One In Particular
Everything had gone black but I didn't notice it was different until I looked up to see Kryten and Dave looking down at me.
"Kryten figured it out, we're back!"
"Yes it was quite simple really..."
But I never got to find out how he did it or how simply he did it because I got up and hurriedly made my way towards my room. I had just wanted to forget everything.
Walking down the corridor my mind a blur but still focused on one thing. I didn't take a blind bit of notice to where I was going; I am amazed I even reached my quarters. Even when I reached my room it didn't occur to me how I got there, as long as I was there it didn't really matter.
When I approached my quarters I heard the hurried foot steps behind me and it wasn't until I was walking through the doors did I hear the out of breath David Lister say "wait up Rimmer"
I ignored him and carried on into the room. The only problem now I was here, I was trapped. He stood behind me, I couldn't see him but I knew he was, his heavy breathing gave him away.
"Why am I getting the cold treatment then?"
And I whipped my body round to face him, Suddenly angry.
"Why do you pretend Lister? You don't care!"
"No you don't, I thought you did but you don't, no-one does!" He tried to reach out to me but I backed up, Not sure what I would do if he touched me... I would either hit him or break down crying, Either way I didn't want it to happen.
"I do care"
"You left me, you said you wouldn't!"
"It wasn't as if I had a choice!"
"But you said..."
"I never left you; I stood by you while Kryten brought you back"
That's when I noticed the change in his demeanour, He could tell he wasn't going to get through to me.
"Rimmer I don't get where all this anger is coming from!"
"I would if you'd tell me!"
"Just shut up Lister!"
"No! I want to know why?!"
"Just tell me!!"
"Shut up!!!" And with that I grabbed hold of his shirt and pulled him roughly towards me. Crushing my lips to his and kissing him hard. He never had time to react because I pushed him away and he stared at me. I couldn't look away; I was in shock, shock at what I had just done. I was searching his face trying to find any indication into what he felt, All I could see was confusion.
"What?" He'd asked. I didn't know how to answer him; I had no idea how to explain what had just happened. I just wanted to hide, from him, from myself. I didn't want to face him; I didn't want to make it worse.
"Go away Lister"
"You expect me to leave now!?" He did have a point, I'm sure if it was the other way around I would want an explanation, But it wasn't the other way around and I needed to get rid of him.
"Yes, Bye bye!"
"Rimmer! You can't expect to kiss me then make me leave"
"I don't want to talk about it"
"I don't care what you want!"
"Just leave!" I shouted, by this time he was mere inches from me and got full force of my words.
Instead of screaming back in my face he grabbed the back of my head and pulled my mouth to his. I didn't want to react but his insistent mouth on mine forced me to behave otherwise. As time went on the kiss became less force full and he eventually pulled away. We were both breathing heavily and he looked into my eyes.
I wasn't in the most comfortable position. His hand behind my neck forcing me to bend down towards him.
"I do care Rimmer, Don't doubt that. The question is, how much do you want me to care?"
"This much" And I kissed him again.
From that day we started our strange relationship. We've had our ups and downs, many fights but that's another story.
He may not have been who I imagined I would end up with but I was happy and in the end isn't that really all that matters?
I can only hope the other Arnold Judas Rimmer's out there feel how I feel. The past, present or the future? - I chose Dave Lister and I choose the present. No longer do I have to live in the past with my failures. Right now is all that matters. Right now this Arnold in particular is completely satisfied.
Arnold. J. Rimmer.
Hope you liked, This probably is my first attempt at some proper romance and it cough kind of shows.
Ah well, I can only get better (damn I just got the song, Things can only get better in my head)
The more you write the more you improve.
The ironic thing was when I was getting taught English at school I was terrible at it and since leaving I got better.
Anywho, Please review, constructive criticism or telling me that I'm a god... either one welcome :)