A/N(Super Ceech) And here comes the FINAL chapter of Love is Blind. Last one, guys! There will be no more after this! So enjoy this parting chapter to the fullest!
A/N (Calum the Angel) Mary-Sues everywhere...BEWARE!
Sora, Akara and Rasha: RUN AWAY!
She descended from the heavens on the pearly white wings of an angel. Half human, half cat demon, half bird demon, half wolf demon, half dog demon, she was the very picture of beauty. Her long, long, LONG, shimmering, shining, glossy, matted, framed hair streamed out behind her like a cascade of obsidian. Well, not really, since obsidian is actually a stone, so it was really more like really long, fine strands of pliable obsidian. That's what her hair was like. Anyhow, it was black. But gorgeous! And her eyes. Don't get me started on her eyes. Violet, like the flower that bears that same name, and like anything else that is violet. Eggplant, perhaps? But such a vegetable is unsuited to a beauty like her. She wore a silky pink kimono that accentuated her every curve, her SLIM waist and her LARGE breasts and her FINE rear-end. Need I go on?
...Well I will.
Her mother had been the most powerful priestess in the land, a long-time rival of the second-most powerful priestess in the land, Kikyo. Her name was Utsukushiisakurakanpeki-kun-san-sama-chan, but usually just went by Sally. Her father had been the most powerful demon in the land, a long-time rival of the second-most powerful demon in the land, Inutaisho. His name was Ringo-Momo, but usually just went by Most Powerful Demon In The Land.
But I digress.
Last we heard, she was descending from the sky in all her gorgeosity and beautifulness when she spotted a group of people on the ground with her crystalline, sky blue eyes. She landed right in front of them, her powerful aura of powerfulness and gorgeosity bringing two of their ranks to their knees in shock and amazement.
One was a hanyou, much like she was, only not quite as beautiful and without quite as much impressive credentials, with long silver hair and golden eyes.
"Are you a goddess?" he asked in awe. "My name is Inuyasha, and I'm in love with you."
"Really?" the totally hot babe said. Her voice was like the clear crystal chime of clear crystal bells on a clear crystal day. "That is very interesting. Even though I am far too important and awesome to fall in love, I slowly find myself attracted to your mediocrity and wish to steal you away from any of the people you're actually in love with."
"I'm in love with no other!" Inuyasha shouted. "I only love you! I was a fool to think that I ever loved Kagome or Kikyo when there's you!"
"Hey!" a girl in strange clothing protested. She glared at the wondrous woman of wondrous awesomeness. "See here, you—!"
"Now now," the sexy lady chided. "Even though I am the most powerful being in all the world, I am highly opposed to violence. I am supposed to be a friendly figure to you, one you can relate with and swap girly stories with. In fact, we will become such good friends, you will very graciously allow me to covet Inuyasha."
"Oh," Kagome said with a smile. "Okay!"
"Pray, what is your name, o beauteous one?" Miroku inquired.
"To say my name would bring about the destruction of the entire world," the comely female explained. "No living being has ever uttered it and lived to tell the tale. So just call me Marisu, if you must."
"Marisu, would you do me the honour of bearing my children?" Miroku pleaded.
"I cannot have children until I willfully choose to," Marisu explained. "That way, I can have relations with whomever I choose and never get pregnant."
"Convenient..." Sango muttered suspiciously.
Marisu turned her vibrant green eyes on the monk. "However, I do not see why you cannot at least try your luck. Would you care to spend a night of passion with me?" She flipped her shiny, shimmering, glittering, fluorescent, incandescent obsidian hair over her perfect, feminine shoulder.
"Would I?" Miroku exclaimed.
Conveniently, it was now night, and there was a conveniently placed shack nearby. Conveniently, Kagome, Sango, Kirara and Shippou all went off picking wild flowers for no particular reason.
Inuyasha sat in a lone tree, surveying the shack. Marisu and Miroku were in there now, and Inuyasha was extremely jealous.
Soon, lemons and limes started flying out the door of the shack. Inuyasha hopped down from his tree branch and sniffed one of the citrus fruits.
"Hm," he murmured. "Metaphors."
Marisu and Miroku stumbled out of the shack. Well, Miroku stumbled, and Marisu walked gracefully and with perfect poise. Miroku's hair was tousled and his hair rumpled. Marisu's hair and clothing were perfect, as usual.
"I'm going to ask you what the hell was going on in there," Inuyasha stated. "I'm just an innocent little hanyou, and no one ever told me about the birds and the bees. Maybe you can teach me, Marisu!"
"Come," she beckoned him sexily, her warm brown eyes glittering seductively in the moonlight.
Miroku sat by the lone tree and watched as more citrus fruit started getting flung from the door of the shack. He noticed as a large, pinkish-orange one bounced over next to him.
Inuyasha stumbled out of the shack, and Marisu followed, still as perfect as ever.
"Now I am the one who is jealous!" Miroku exclaimed.
"Then why do you not team up and both fawn over me together?" Marisu suggested.
Inuyasha and Miroku shared a look, and shook hands. The three entered the shack, and the following ensued: Marisu/Miroku/Inuyasha, Marisu/Inuyasha/Miroku, Inuyasha/Marisu/Miroku, Inuyasha/Miroku/Marisu, Miroku/Inuyasha/Marisu, and Miroku/Marisu/Inuyasha.
The next morning, Marisu decided it was time for her to leave. Conveniently, Kagome, Sango, Kirara and Shippou had not yet returned from picking flowers.
"But why?" Inuyasha demanded. "You're the only woman I've ever truly loved!"
"You are also the only woman I have ever truly loved!" Miroku added. "Why must you break our manly-yet-sensitive hearts thus?"
"Do not worry," Marisu said softly, looking back over her feminine shoulder with dazzling gray eyes and offering the sweetest smile in the history of sweet smiles. They melted on the spot into two puddles. Marisu sighed. "That always happens... Well, if you can still hear me, I will return to you...someday. For now, I must go defeat Naraku."
So she flew away; never to be seen again? It shall be revealed in a later chapter that will never be written.
She was flying majestically over a mountaintop when she spotted a lone wolf demon on a conveniently flat, sheltered, seductive plateau. She soon found her heart softening once again to the mediocrity of the common demon. She landed before him in a flash of unfettered glory, and he gaped at her gorgeosity and beautifulness.
"I find you rather attractive," Marisu said to the wolf demon. "I would do well perhaps to comment on how muscular you are, or perhaps how lovely your hair is, or what charming blue eyes you have. What is your name?"
"K-Kouga..." he stammered. "You are by far the most beautiful sight I have ever laid eyes upon. Way more beautiful than what's-her-face, Kaga... Kaga, Mumu, whatever... You've come at a good time: I was just angstily contemplating how romantically lonely I am, and was hoping someone such as yourself would arrive and relieve me of my sexual frustration."
"That can be arranged," Marisu said suggestively. Despite her suggestive tone, her voice was always chaste and very pretty. "I am part wolf demon, you know."
"Oh, good!" Kouga exclaimed. "Wolves are monogamous, after all, and you are the only one I could ever love!"
Conveniently, it was night again. Many citrus fruits went flying over the peaks of the mountain. Conveniently, Ginta, Hakkaku and all the wolves were on guard-duty elsewhere and never thought to go search for their leader, who had mysteriously disappeared for some time now.
Ginta was bonked on the head by something, and he managed to catch it in his hand before it fell to the ground.
"A lemon?" he said, puzzled. "Where did this come from?"
"I heard lemons are bad omens!" Hakkaku cried anxiously. "Throw it away, throw it away!"
Ginta hastily tossed the fruit over the side of a cliff like a hot potato.
When it was morning again, Marisu needed to depart again.
"My little wolfy heart is breaking," Kouga said sorrowfully, "But I know you are bound to destroy Naraku, and I will not try to stop you. I will never forget you."
Marisu looked back at Kouga one last time, her ghostly white eyes filled with regret. "Farewell."
She made one last little detour on her way to Naraku's castle, which she knew the exact location of due to her vast magical powers, which she learned from the second-most powerful magician in the land (she was the first, of course.) She spotted a demon man on the ground, and he was by far the most magnificent specimen she had ever laid eyes upon. His long silver hair undulated sensuously in the breeze that always seemed to be around when there was long hair to be undulated, and a large fluffy...thing was slung over his shoulder. This was by far the softest, fluffiest looking...fluffy...she had ever seen.
She landed before him. He did not fall to his knees, and therefore had the best self-control of any man she had ever met.
"You are beautiful, and I find even my stone cold heart melting," the man said. "I, Sesshoumaru, should like to drag you off into the forest and take off my clothes."
"Okay, but then I really have to be somewhere," she agreed.
Conveniently, Jaken and Rin had gone off to...um, to... Well, they just weren't there. Sesshoumaru and Marisu wandered off into the forest, and, as Sesshoumaru had promised, he began removing his kimono.
Marisu sat by a tree and watched. "I find you very prettily attractive. The sight of your finely sculpted chest makes my heart beat faster."
"It gets better," Sesshoumaru purred. He bent down and began to remove his shoes. Or at least he would have, were they not double knotted.
"Come on, stupid things!" Sesshoumaru muttered, hopping around on one foot trying to unlace his shoe on the other. "Why must you never undo when I'm about to get lai-ai-ai-aid!"
"I can help you," Marisu offered. She snapped her fingers and conveniently, Sesshoumaru was naked. He looked down at himself and covered up with his fluffy modestly.
"I am impressed and embarrassed by your sexy skills," he said, blushing.
Not long after, night had conveniently fallen and many a citrus fruit went flying out from the forest. Rin gathered up the lemons and limes happily, as she was actually collecting fruit with Jaken at the time.
As Marisu flew away after giving Sesshoumaru a long, angsty speech about how the threads of fate had become tangled and could not be undone by a simple clothing-removal spell, Sesshoumaru lazed upon his fluffy in the forest and looked up at the sky.
"She'll be back," he said. "They ALWAYS come back!"
Finally, Marisu arrived at Naraku's castle. She could have easily blown it up and ended it there, but she was very opposed to violence of any sort. She walked right in, through the seductive corridors and into Naraku's seductive private chamber. He did not stop her, for he was captivated by her beauty.
"For some reason I cannot explain, I have fallen in love with you," Naraku said. "Even though technically I should love no one, nor should I have a gender."
Not only was Marisu strikingly beautiful, but she also had the most advanced intellect of anyone alive at the time. She would lull Naraku into a false sense of security before destroying him, the only way she knew how...
"Perhaps you would enjoy inflaming your passions with me," she offered. "It does not even have to be night. That sexy miasma around your castle provides the proper mood lighting."
"But...there's something you should know about me..." Naraku mumbled, suddenly embarrassed. "I have no genitalia..."
"But there are so many other fun things we could do," Marisu suggested.
So limes went shooting out of Naraku's seductive private chamber, covering the floor of the seductive corridor outside.
After the flow of limes had ceased, Marisu suddenly jumped up and outstretched her palm at Naraku, red eyes flashing dangerously.
"I will now destroy you, because that is my true calling in life!"
"Pff," Naraku snorted. "Loosen up, baby."
She fired a shot of pure energy at Naraku. He leapt out of the way just in time. The blast created a giant hole in the wall, and in one side of the castle, and everything else that happened to get in the way. It finally stopped and exploded where the Mongolian Desert still stands today.
Marisu gaped at the hole she had caused— and it wasn't through Naraku!
"I m-m-missed?-!-?-!" she cried in horror. Smoke began pouring off of her once-hot body, and she slowly fell to the ground into a puddle. "No! My powers! They're evaporating! I'm melting! Melting! Oh, what a world...!"
Inuyasha, Miroku, Kouga, Sesshoumaru and Naraku all cried because Marisu was dead.
A/N (Calum the Angel) Just for reference, a rough translation of the name of Marisu's mother, the priestess Utsukushiisakurakanpeki-kun-san-sama-chan, is Beautiful Cherry Blossom Perfect Male-Friend Mrs. Queen Female-Friend. A rough translation of the name of Marisu's father, the demon Ringo-Momo, is Apple Peach. XD
A/N (Super Ceech) And sadly, this concludes Love is Blind once and for all! We hope you all enjoyed it, but we're not hanging you out to dry quite yet! Go check out our new parody, Copy and Paste, on Calum the Angel's account! You can access her profile through my Favourite Authors list. Drop in and tell us what you think!