What If? By Spunky

Summary: What would have happened if Hagrid had given Harry to Sirius that fateful Halloween night? Misunderstandings, pranks and a very mad Hermione.



Disclaimer: If Harry Potter was mine, would I be writing Fanfiction? None of this belongs to me so everyone else can battle it out arguing that it's theirs. Let me know who wins.



Author's Note: Let it be known that the characters in this story are alternate universe characters. They will behave differently then they do in the books because they have lived their lives differently. However if they act differently, reasons will be give for their change in behavior. They are not Out of Character (OOC) in this story because the situation is different. I have done my best to make the behavior changes realistic. Everything up to when the Potters are killed is the same as is described in the books.



Yes, I know that I said that it would be a little less than a week till this chapter came out. But it hasn't been. To sum it up, I've been lazy. This may or may not be the last chapter I post but It's pretty self explanatory from here on.



I solemnly swear I am up to no good!



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Ron stared wide eyed at the boy- no, Harry Potter- standing in front of him. "You're HARRY POTTER?!?!"



Harry sighed, "Why is that such a big deal?"



"This is amazing!" proclaimed George, "The ministry is looking everywhere for you and WE found you! I mean, you defeated You-Know-Who!"



There was a long pause. In which there was a lot of staring.



"So, what do we do now?" asked Harry abruptly.



"Excuse me?"



"We are stuck in the Muggle World. Do you know how to get back to Hogwarts?"



Fred crimped, "Well, we didn't quite plan that far ahead. But I guess we can just go back the way we came."



"Lead the way, oh great navigator Fred!" proclaimed George.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



A few hours later...



"I'm sure we were supposed to turn right back there."



"Just like the last time where we turned right and we ended up in the middle of a Muggle Parade, right Fred?" George elbowed his twin.



"So I haven't always been right. How was I supposed that it was Orange Day in Devon Village?"



Ron piped up, "Maybe from the six signs we passed on the way into town."



"You're not helping Ron."



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Molly Weasley was not the least suprised when Errol the Owl plopped onto the kitchen table in the Burrow. This was the fourth owl that she had received this year about the twins' behavior. Thus far they had blown up a cauldron in Potions with a filibuster firework, cast a spell on a Slytherin second year so that his skin flashed the colors of the rainbow and let Lee Jordan's pet tarantula loose in the staff quarters. Needless to say, Professor McGonagall had not been happy when she woke up at three in the morning due to something furry crawling across her face.



Molly looked at her husband, pleading. "Arthur, would you please open that? I don't think I could stand to find out what the twins have done this time."



Arthur obliged. He untied the note from Errol's leg and set him in his cage.



"What prank do you think those two rascals pull this time?" Arthur grinned with mirth. His laughter faded as he saw Molly wasn't amused.



He opened it and turned pale.



"What did they do this time?" Molly lamented.



"Nothing Dear. Nothing." Arthur maneuvered the letter away from her sight.



"I declare Arthur! If they've blown something else up, I'm going to find out. You might as well tell me."





"That's just it. They haven't blown anything up or pulled any other types of pranks." Arthur paused. "The twins and Ron have run disappeared."



"WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"



"Percy wrote that no one can find them."



Without saying another word Molly raced over to the fireplace, grabbed a pinch of floo powder and threw it into the fire. "HOGWARTS!!!" She cried.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



By the time Harry, Ron, Fred and George arrived in Hogsmeade it was evening. The four had slowly returned to normal conversation although they tactfully stayed away from topics that concerned Harry being.....well,.... Harry. As they approached Honeydukes they were discussing the Chudley Cannons.



"They're still in last place?!?!" That was Harry.



"They're going to be making a comeback soon, just you wait. Just this year they-"



Ron was cut off by George, "You'll have to excuse Ron. He's under the delusion that the Cannons are going to win a game sometime in the next ten years. We're working on getting him to a psychologist in order to help him work through these issues he's having."



"I am NOT having any ISSUES! You just wait and see! Any day now they'll be back on top!"



"Not in a million years."



Harry interrupted the brother's heated debate as they arrived in the center of town. "Where do we go from here?"



Harry watched as the twins shared a glance between them. Fred spoke.



"You have to promise that you won't tell anyone."



"Tell anyone what?" Harry asked.



"Promise."



"All right, I promise. Tell anyone what?"



George pulled a piece of paper from his pocket. "This, is a very helpful mischief-making tool." He pulled out his wand, "I solemnly swear I am up to no good." Lines spread out on the piece of paper until a map of Hogwarts was formed.



Harry gasped, "The Maunders Map!"



"You've heard about it?!?!"



"My Dad and Sirius helped write it!"



"They helped write it?!?!"



"Sirius was Padfoot and my Dad was Prongs. Another of their friends, Remus Lupin, was Moony and the idiot back in the alleyway was Wormtail."



"Wicked!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Molly Weasley burst into the Headmaster's office trailed by her husband. The Headmaster was seated at his desk speaking to two men.



"Professor!"



Dumbledore looked up, "Molly. Thank you for coming. I'm afraid we have a small problem."



"Any news about the boys?"



"I'm afraid not. But please, sit down and join us, you also Arthur. I believe you've met Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. And of course Minerva McGonagall."



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Parvati Patil watched with amazement as her roommate paced the length of the Gryffindor first year girls dormitory all the while muttering under her breath. She had stumbled in upon this peculiar sight when hurrying upstairs to look up a spell to reapply her makeup.



"Hermione?" Parvati questioned. "Are you all right?"



The bookworm just kept pacing and muttering.



Parvati tried again. "I think the carpet is getting a little thin."



Nothing.



"McGonagall just told me to tell you that you failed your Transfiguration test."



Hermione didn't acknowledge her presence. Now Parvati KNEW something was wrong. Normally at the mention of even one wrong answer Hermione would completely flip out and read every possible book to figure out what the right answer was, the reasoning behind it and anything else she could cross reference in the process.



"Hermione? Can you hear me? Have you gone deaf?"



Hermione did not speak to Parvati but it was then that some of the mumbled words reached Parvati's ears. "Never would have...that dog!...and Chad...missing...no....not really Chad....Harry is his....."



Parvati then remembered Hermione telling her about her brother Chad who was "a bigger menace that the Weasley twins!" as Hermione had put it.



Parvati tried one more time, "Hermione, your brother Chad just took your book Hogwarts, A History."



Hermione suddenly jumped back to reality. "HE"S NOT CHAD!" Hermione trumpeted, and then cringing, "Oh, this is the biggest mess!" and Hermione tore out of the room.



Parvati watched all this in puzzlement. She could never understand that girl. What on earth was- Well, whatever it was it probably wasn't significant. Now, back to more important things. Like that make-up application charm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



A half hour later, Harry and his new friends were at the back of the statue of the One-Eyed Witch.

"Alright," stated Fred. "There's no one on the other side of the statue so we'll just sneak back in and no one will be the wiser. Then you, Harry, can make your grand entrance and scare the bejeepers out of Hermione and everyone else."



"Is that even a word?" asked Ron.



"I don't know," replied Fred. "But it sure sounds cool."



"Wait a moment," intruded George. "Before we head back to the common room do you think it would be a good idea to plant a little suprise for our favorite potions teacher?"



Harry's face lit up. "A prank?"



"No, a basket of flowers." George rolled his eyes, "of course a prank."



"Sounds good to me. What's the teacher like?"



"Oh, he's nasty. He takes points off Gryffindor for ridiculous things. Like getting a potion RIGHT. Meanwhile, he awards Slytherin House lot's of points for small things, like attempting a potion."



"Say no more," grinned Harry, "Let's go!"



They arrived at the dungeons in minute time with assistance from the Maunders Map. George had hardly pulled the dung bombs out of his bag (why he had them with him Harry did not want to know) when Harry heard footsteps coming toward him. George stuffed the dungbomb back into his bag and Harry and the Weasleys hid behind the potions teachers' desk. Just in time.



They hadn't been hid but a moment when a man entered. He was tall with dark greasy hair and reminded Harry a bit of a vampire he had once seen in a movie. It took the man only a minute to find the foursome.



"Out!" he commanded in barely a whisper.



Harry, Ron, Fred and George shuffled out from under the desk.



"So," hissed the man, "The missing Weasleys have been found. You've caused everyone quite a lot of trouble. What are you doing here? Planting another prank, no doubt." The man's eyes loomed from the Weasleys to Harry in one unblinking stare. "And what is your name?"



"What's yours?" Harry responded sharply. The man's demeanor rubbed Harry the wrong way.



"Don't give me cheek. I asked you a question you answer it. You should have respect for your betters."



"You may be older than me," Harry muttered, "But that doesn't make you my 'better'."



"What was that?" barked the man.



"Nothing." Said Harry, and then, seeing how the man was glaring at him he added "sir."



"That's better. Now, what is your name?"



"Harry."



The man's eyes bore into Harry's head as though he was trying to see the answer, rather than hear it from Harry. Harry met his eyes unblinkingly. "I did not ask for your first name. Now, I will repeat this one more time. What is your name?"



"Potter."



The man's eye's widened and his face went from pale to white. "Potter!" He hissed, and then, "5 points from Gryffindor!"



"But I'm not in a house yet." said Harry, puzzled.



"Then once you are in Gryffindor there will be five points taken away. Follow me." The man left the room with a swish of his cloak.



"But-"



"Don't push it." Said Ron. "Snape can get nasty."



"That was Snape?!?!"



"He's the worst teacher in the school."



"He's a teacher?!?! Oy, I'm going to fail!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Sirius Black looked up as Severus Snape stormed into the Headmaster's office.



"Albus I-" Snape cut off upon acknowledgment of the presence of Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley and Minerva McGonagall. "Black." Snape sneered.



"Snape, what a cheerful edition to our conversation." growled Sirius. He had never liked that slimy git.



"I would hold my tongue if I were you Black, I found something of yours planting dungbombs in my classroom." Snape turned to the Weasleys, "And of yours."



"What?" questioned Sirius, unsure if he believed what his arch nemesis was insinuating.



"Your brats seem to have found each other and decided to wreck havoc upon my dungeon."



It was then that there was a knock on the door.



"Come in," called Dumbledore.



The door slowly opened and four boys entered cautiously, three redheads and one- "Harry!" Sirius leaped from his chair and engulfed him in an oxygen depriving hug. "Don't you ever go off like that again do you hear me?"



Snape said something to Dumbledore and bolted from the room but Sirius was too preoccupied with Harry to pay attention.



"Sorry Sirius." Harry muttered. "You forgot your wand and I was trying to find you."



"Sirius," Professor Dumbledore interrupted, "Come sit down. I think there is a lot of explaining to be done."



"Of course Albus." said Sirius, "Harry, this is Professor Dumbledore who I've told you about."



"Nice to meet you Professor." Harry replied shyly. Since when was Harry shy? Sirius wondered.

"It's nice to see you again also Mr. Potter." Dumbledore's eyes gave off a familiar twinkle, "I believe you've met Remus Lupin?"



Harry suddenly turned pink. "Sorry I ran away, I didn't-"



"Understandable, Harry." Remus cut off. "I'm just glad you're all right. You look just like your father, I should have seen it sooner."



Dumbledore turned to Mrs. Weasley who was berating her three sons. "Would you come join us? I'd like to untangle recent events. Minerva, would you mind writing to Mr. and Mrs. Granger to assure them that Harry is all right and then finding Miss Granger and bringing her to my office?"



"Certainly Albus." McGonagall left for the Owlery.



"Now, Mr. Potter." said Dumbledore when all were seated, "Would you please explain what happened from when Remus first met you on the train up until now."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~