Claimer: I do own the idea.
Synopsis: Draco thinks about everything, and admits his feelings when Luna comes to collect her book.
If You're Gone
I think I've already lost you
I think you're already gone
Draco stared around at his room. There were so many memories. Her sitting on the table in his dorm, laughing as he spoke about his hatred of Harry. He didn't find it in the least bit funny. She had found it amusing.
She used to sit at the end of his bed as he did his homework. She used to hum and he would tell her it was irritating. She never stopped. After a few months later he began to stand it. A few days later and he wouldn't hear it again.
In her own strange way, she was beautiful. He loved to watch her reading. Her tongue stuck out between her teeth as she concentrated. Her hair was dull but he loved how it shone in the light. How her eyes lit up when she smiled.
Every time she walked through the door, she glanced around it, looking at who was in the room beyond before walking in. He found that charming. She hadn't even noticed.
He wasn't supposed to feel like this. He was supposed to be happy about her leaving. He had always said to Blaise that all he wanted was 'another notch on the bedpost', though Blaise could never understand why they stayed together so long. I don't think Draco understood it himself.
A knock on the door. "Yeah!" Draco called. She walked him.
"I've come to get my book back," she told him. Draco sighed. He picked it up off the floor and handed it to her. "Thank you Draco." She turned to leave.
"Why did you leave me?" he asked.
"I didn't. You forced me to." All of the insults, all of the time he told her off for crying. . . he never believed he would miss her this much.
"So am I."
"Wait!" She turned back to face him. She raised her eyebrows. "I miss you." She turned her head, avoiding his eyes. He stepped towards her. "Hear me out."
"I know I wasn't great to you, and I know I messed up but. . . you showed me things I didn't know. And I hate this!" She stepped back from him. "I know I scare you. I know I get angry. . . but god Luna! I need you! You've screwed everything up. I wasn't supposed to care about anyone."
"I found out about the bet."
"I didn't let him give me the money."
"You lied to me Draco."
"Yeah, I admit I did. But something happened which wasn't supposed to. I began to care about you and. . ."
"Luna, please listen to me."
"Luna, I think somewhere I fell in love with you. I didn't plan it. I didn't want it to happen, but all I wanna do is kiss you right now."
"Draco, you hurt me so much. . ."
"I know, I know. You shouldn't forgive me for it. . ." he looked down, in anger and self-pity.
"But I do forgive you. I wish I didn't but I do. And you pulled more wool over my eyes than Hermione Granger can spin for her damn house elves! Y'know, after a months I thought. . . wow. This isn't a joke, but Blaise decided to mess it up. . . I was hurt. A lot."
"I didn't want to hurt you. . . it wasn't intended," he told her. "But with my mother in Azkaban, and my father dead. . . I was free. But I guess you're never free from Slytherin loyalites. From a reputation."
"I gave up everything for you! I gave up the first real friends I had in years. I even gave up my father's respect. And I don't even hate you. And I want to. . . bloody hell Draco, I want to! But you won't let me because you won't move on. And I can't. I care about you so much. . ."
"Can't I just kiss you?" he asked. She stared at him. They slowly walked towards each other in a perfect eye-lock, cold eyes looking into her warm ones. Finally, they felt safe.
"Why don't you?" she asked. He moved a strand of hair from her face. He smiled.
"I've missed you." And he pulled her into that kiss. . .
I think we should try
I think I could need this in my life