-- I feel so bad about not being able to update this fic for so long! I've just been so busy with school and I'm also working on another fic so I kind of let this one slip by. Well not anymore. This is actually one of my favorite stories so I think I'm gonna focus on it more!

So I know the concept for this fic is a little different especially the pairing, but once I started to write this I realized that Seto and Mai make quite a pair. What's the term someone once used…'Arrogantshipping?' Yeah I like that! Real funny.

So anyways sorry about the late update and thanks for all the great reviews. I already have great plans for this fic, which I'm sure you all will enjoy. This is probably one of my more humorous fics, so I guess if you like humor with a little drama then this is the fic for you.

Well anyways enjoy and I hope to update soon.'

Disclamer: I don't own Yugioh or any of it's characters (cuz life is cruel). However, I was gonna bid on them while shoppin ebay, but when I was watchin TV I saw this interesting commercial saying that McDonalds is havin this two for two Big Mac sale and well.......

What's Love Got to do With It?

Chp2 Deal me in, Deal me out

"Seto what's goin on! Let me see!" Whined Mokuba as he struggled to peer over his much taller brother's shoulder. "What's wrong? Why are you just standing there? SEtO, quit blockin the door way!"

However, after watching his brother stare outside at the mystery woman in a stupor, Mokuba's patience snapped as he forcefully pushed his brother to the side and peeked his head out the doorway. "Oh, hi Mai! So Seto, where's this woman you hi….red…MAI!"

Mai waved weakly at the younger Kaiba, and then turned her face back towards the shocked Seto. "Oh, man don't tell me that your?"

"Yep." Nodded Mai.

"Well this just gets better and better." Laughed Mokuba as he examined the dazed look on both Mai and Seto's faces. "Well don't just stand in the doorway looking stupid. Come in."

"No. This must be some kind of mistake." Retorted Seto as he finally regained his sense of speech.

"Seto?" Piped Mokuba as he looked at his brother questionably.

"Out of all the women in Japan, why would they send me you?"

"What's that suppose to mean?" Snapped Mai as she suddenly felt offended. "I mean sure their ain't a lot of rich guys in Japan, but still. I'm just as shocked by all of this as you are."

Seto glared at Mai suspiciously as he studied her eyes for any signs of deception. He then grunted something intangible under his breath and swiftly turned and walked away.

"I guess that's an invitation to come in." Smiled Mokuba feebly as he motioned for Mai to follow. Mai hesitantly entered the huge mansion, as she was astounded by what she saw. The floor was paved a brilliant white and blue marble color and the main hall was huge. Just short of the entrance was an enormous staircase with a golden banister shaped like a dragon whose body ran along the towering staircase. The walls were also painted a light white and blue color, and were decked with many famous paintings that Mai would have sworn belonged in museums.

'So Kaiba has a little taste.'

"Katsugia, what is the meaning of this?" Growled Seto into his cell phone as he made his way back into the kitchen. Mokuba shook his head remorsefully as he and Mai soon followed after him.

"Don't you guys have a house cleaner or something?" Cringed Mai as she stepped into a puddle of cheerio's.

Mokuba let out nervous laugh as Seto glared bitterly at the box of cereal in front of him. "Men." Shrugged Mai, as she wasn't quite sure what to make of their strange response.

Finally, after yelling into his receiver a few times, Seto calmly set the phone down and glared over at Mai and Mokuba. At first he had intended to say something insulting to the blonde, but he quickly changed his mind as he realized Mokuba was having too much fun. The two of them were now tossing cheerio's at the kid on the cereal box, and currently Mai was in the lead.

"You've done this before haven't you?" Frowned Mokuba.

"Sure kiddo. I spend all my Friday nights smackin cheesy American kids in the head with cheerios."

"Hardy har." Drawled Mokuba as he rolled his eyes and flicked another cheerio at the box. "Oh and that puts me in the lead! Now what?"

"So is the big bad Kaiba done huffin and puffin into his whittle bitty cell phone?" Smirked Mai as she realized that Kaiba was staring at her and Mokuba oddly.

"Tch!" Sneered Seto as his normal cold exterior returned. "You can joke all you want, because as we speak, Katsugia is sending me over another wife."

"Fine by me Romeo." Shrugged Mai as she hopped out of her seat and grabbed her purse. "It's not like I want to stand around here and be insulted by you. Besides, you're associates already gave me a down payment of 10 million yen, so I guess this day wasn't a total loss."

"They what!?!" Exclaimed Kaiba, before he nodded his head and smirked. "…Never mind. It doesn't really matter to me. All merely chump change."

"You know you have a really shitty attitude Kaiba." Frowned Mai as she responded to his indirect insult. "That's just something I've always wanted to tell you."

"Well you're the one with the primped up personality and the sleazy wardrobe." Countered Seto smugly, as he seemed amused by the look on Mai's face. "That's just something I've always wanted to tell you, although I'm surprised no one hasn't done so before."

Mai's face turned an angry crimson as she balled up her fist up and winced. However, she soon let out a forced breath, before she arrogantly flicked her hair over her shoulders and snapped her head away from Kaiba. "You know I have the right mind to take you out, but seein as how I like Mokuba so much, I'll let it slide just this once."

"Fine." Smirked Seto as he watched the flustered blonde retreat. "Don't let the door hit you on the way out."

Seto's smile only widened as Mai flicked him off without even turning around to face him. Oh how he loved to torture his opponents. The weaker they were, the more riled up he could get them, henceforth, the reason why he figured he got his best reactions out of Jonouchi.

"Seto! Why do you have to always do things like that?" Scolded Mokuba as he glared at his brother angrily.

"Because…I can." Chuckled Seto as he realized that answer was the honest truth. However the sound of the doorbell quickly interrupted his entertainment, as both brothers stared at each other questionably.

"Man that Katsugia sure does work fast." Laughed Mokuba tensely.

"Eh-eh," nodded Seto in disagreement. "Try again."

"Well if that isn't him then who…"

Mai stormed down the hall as she made her way towards the door, cursing Kaiba with every step. "That stupid Jack Ass. Now he's got me all riled up! Why I just wish for once someone would put that man in his place!"

However, just as Mai began to open the door so she could make her exit, the doorbell rang.

There before Mai stood a tall, lanky man, clad in a tacky tan suit and a matching cowboy hat. "::Well now if only service at my house was this efficient::" Hooted the man just before he looked Mai up and down and stopped his eyes at her chest. "::And good lookin!::" Mai nodded at the man with confusion, as she seemed to have no idea what he had said.

"::Oh pardon me mam::. I-don't-speaka-very-good-Japanese." Slurred the man in a very Neanderthal Japanese accent.

"::Well I speak perfect English::." Replied Mai back as she refrained from rolling her eyes.

"M-Mr. Avery!" Exclaimed Seto as he appeared behind Mai.

"Oh Kaiba!" Whooped the man as he slapped the brunet across the back so hard that he nearly fell over. "Good to see you, and who prattle is this fine vixen?"

Seto turned and looked at the confused Mai apathetically, but turned his head too quickly to see the malicious smile that had appeared on her lips. "Oh her? Why she's merely my-"

"Wife!" Blurted Mai as she pushed Kaiba to the side, snatched Avery's hand up, and shook it ecstatically. "Yes I'm Mrs. Mai Kaiba. A pleasure to meet you."

Seto's face paled as he snapped his head back at Mai and gawked. It was then that he noticed the mischievous gleam in Mai's eyes and her equally devilish smirk. However, he soon regained his composure as he and Mai stared at each other through a mental lock, unconscious to the world around them.

'You just signed your death wish woman.'

'Oh, Kaiba dear. I'm about to put you in your place!"

"Oh I should have guessed a pretty face like that belonged to you Kaiba!" Beamed Avery as he seemed to be completely oblivious to the sudden tense atmosphere that had developed around them.

Avery's sudden statement quickly snapped Seto out of his visual battle with Mai, as he shook his head and turned back towards the man. "Uhh, Mr. Avery what brings you here?"

"Oh well I had to stop here in Japan for a little business and I decided to drop by and give you a line. Mind if I come in?" Questioned Avery as he gave Seto a suggestive glance towards the inside of the mansion.

"Uhh well actually I was just about to head over to work. I'm sure you much rather pay a visit to the main office of the company you just signed with." Laughed Seto in a tone that bordered between nervousness and anxiety. "Besides, you will have plenty of time to tour the house once your family gets here."

"Well I guess you're right." Shrugged Avery dumbly, before he turned back to Mai and tilted his hat at her. "Well, Mrs. Kaiba it sure was a pleasure to meet ya."

Mai waved back at Avery coyly before she stared at Kaiba through the corner of her eye, and winked. Seto felt his blood freeze as he shivered at the feral like smile Mai was giving him.

"Ohhh. Umm I just had to grab something before we head out. I'll meet you in the limo." Avery blinked back at Kaiba and nodded before he finally turned towards the limo and left.

As soon as Avery was well out of earshot, Kaiba forcefully pushed Mai back into the mansion and slammed the door behind him. "What do you think you're doing!"

"What do you think?" Smirked Mai as flicked her hair over her shoulders proudly. "Haven't you ever heard of a little word called karma?"

"WOMAN!" Thundered Seto as he felt his thread of patience snap.

"Now, now dear, do you really want to get on my bad side?" Purred Mai suggestively. "Why isn't Mr. Avery just outside waiting for you. Hmm, maybe I should pay him a visit and tell him all about your little lie."

"Fiiine!" Growled Seto as he ruffled his fingers through his hair irritably. "Name your price."

"Mmm hmm." Nodded Mai as she shrugged her shoulders. "So do you always flip out your check book every time you have a crisis?"

"It's never failed me before, now either you take my offer or leave here empty handed." Snapped Seto bitterly.

"Well at least I would have the self satisfaction of ruining your plans." Chuckled Mai before she noticed the icy glare Seto was giving her. Suddenly the room turned very cold as Mai felt a shiver run down her spine. "Okay, okay…how bout…Double the original deal!"

"DOUBLE!" Shouted Seto as he nearly shook the entire hallway. "But that's 170 million yen!"

"Hmm, I guess you do have a point" Sighed Mai as she stared at the floor thoughtfully "Okay how bout' TRIPLE. A bargain considering the pain and mental stress I know being married to you will give me."

"TRIPLE! Why you conniving…"

"The more you talk the more higher my prices go up. Besides Kaibakun, isn't this all just chump change?" grinned Mai as she did a play on Seto's own words.

"Fine! Fine." Barked Seto through clenched teeth. "You have yourself a deal!"

"Ohh boo hoo Kaiba. You look like you're gonna cry." Chuckled Mai as she nodded her head in a superior manner. However, her victory party was soon cut short as she noticed Seto's face had transformed from tense to just down right creepy.

"I wouldn't be so smug because when I come back I'm going to make sure you earn your money." Hissed Seto, before he headed out the door, leaving Mai with the task of interpreting exactly what he meant.

'What's that suppose to mean? Kaiba wouldn't dare…would he?' Shuddered Mai as the mansion's temperature dropped another ten degrees.


"KUJAKU!" Roared a furious voice, causing Mai to nearly drop her tray.

"Y-yes Jakusama?" Sighed Mai as she made her way towards the angry man.

"I told you to have table five cleared an hour ago! So why is it still a mess."

"That's because I did clear it, but seeing as how that was an hour ago, more customers came by and messed it up again." Clenched Mai as she struggled not to hit her boss.

Jaku blinked sheepishly as he realized Mai was right. "Don't sass me Kujaku. Now clean it up again!"

"Stupid ass. I'm the bartender not your waitress." Growled Mai as she headed towards the table to clean it.

"My what a glamorous life we do lead." Gleamed a smug voice from behind Mai. Mai quickly jerked her head around as she came face to face with a pair of icy blue sapphires.

"What are you doing here? Don't you know you're too young to come into a place like this, junior?" Scowled Mai as she glared at Seto who was leaning in the booth across from her.

"Heh." Chuckled Seto queerly.

"I don't have time for you right now." Grumbled Mai as she decided to ignore his questionable response. "Isn't it past your bedtime or something?"

"Here." Snapped Seto as he shoved something in Mai's face.

"What's this?" Blinked Mai as she tried to focus on the paper, but failed.

"It's a contract. Years of business conditioning have taught me that you can never trust a verbal agreement." Frowned Seto as he set the document on the table in front of Mai.

"Please Kaiba, I already signed a contract with your business associates." Sighed Mai wryly as she ignored the paper and began to wipe the table around it.

"I tore it up." Muttered Seto strangely. "Seeing as how you changed the terms of service I decided to change a few little details myself."

"Oh?" Blinked Mai as she dropped her towel and decided to examine the contract.

"Take your time reading it if you must. I have all night, but if you want me to give just a brief summary of it then I tell you now. The contract basically states that I will pay you 255 million yen for your services, however if in any case you were to breech our contract I'm entitled to paying you not one cent including the 10 million yen my associates have already given you."

Mai scrounged her nose at Seto's statement, as the alarm signal in the back of her mind suddenly went off.

'Crap! I already used most of the money Kaiba paid me to pay off my rent and all of my credit card bills. If this deal goes bust, I'm gonna owe the jerk a lot of money!'

"And what if I decided not to sign this. Avery has already met me, so you basically need me." Replied Mai self-righteously.

Seto raised a brow at Mai and shrugged.

'Hmm not quite the response I expected from the little twerp…he seems a lot more cool and collected in comparison to earlier today…I don't think this is all a very good idea.'

"Then I could just make up some kind of lie to cover up for you're sudden absence. That might injure my credibility a bit, but in the end that's something I'm willing to sacrifice." Replied Seto calmly.

'Oh now I see. The little peon is so smug because he knows he has the upper hand now. Damn, before Kaiba just got on my nerves, but now I'm really starting to hate him. Jonouchi was right.'

"KUJAKU!!" Thundered Jaku as he realized what she was doing. "Stop flirting with your little boy toy and get back over here!"

"Hmm," Grimaced Seto as he eyes narrowed in on Mai triumphantly. "255 million yen could let a woman like you live a pretty comfortable life, that is between winning a few tournaments here and there. So what do you say?"

Mai glared at Seto suspiciously before an angry voice busted her train of thought.

"KUJAKU! Who said you could leave your station in the first place. Get back here and serve these customers their drinks!"

"Well?" Shrugged Seto haughtily as he waved the contract into the air.

Mai stared at the paper nervously and then cursed under her breath. 'What should I do?'


"Fine!" She blurted as she snatched the paper out of Seto's hands. "You have yourself a deal. Now let's blow this place!"

"Heh, I knew I'd get my way in the end." Chuckled Seto as he watched Mai sign the contract.

'Hmph. That's what you think Kaiba-boy, because when I'm done with you, you'll never want to cross another woman again!'

To be continued…

So the wheels are finally set in motion and now the real fun can finally begin! Oh I have such plans! I love to write scenes with Seto and Mai. Both of them are so arrogant and stubborn! I love it! Why didn't I ever look into this pairing before…Well actually I don't think I ever seen a Seto/Mai pairing. I'm sure they're out there…well whatever!

Anyways for any of you who wondered the amount that Seto agreed to pay Mai is approximately 2,323,462 US dollars. That's a lot of money huh? Heck Seto wouldn't ever have to pay me nearly that much to get me to marry him…Hell he wouldn't have to pay me at all. If I could ever get my hands on him…Yes, such a sexy hot bisho!

Also the stuff in ::bold print with the funny dash marks:: means that the people are speaking in English. I didn't know how else to signify it, and it's obvious that for the majorty of the time thier speaking Japanese. So just thought I'd let you know

Well I hope you guys liked this chapter and I would just love it if you told me how you felt through many wonderful reviews! Until then I'll check you all next time (hopefully soon)!