I don't own Naruto. Must you spite me all the time?
Title: Hot blooded - The Prologue
Author: Purrfectly679 - e-mail for comments and suggestions. Feedback highly appreciated.
Rating: R, bad language, sarcasm, Naru x ? , Sasu x ?
Notes: OK I know I kinda hinted that I would write a humour fic... But it was much harder than anticipated . So I decided to do a normal romance instead lol. It's quite sarcastic at times - not meant to be funny really lol. It's also a little more light-hearted compared to my other fics, but hey! That could and probably would change later on...
And if you wonder where I got the idea for this fic from, blame it on reading too many Draco Malfoy Veela fics haha!! (HP books)
Finally - this chapter is dedicated to kayoko - thanks for the Gravitation dj's and all the online advice! And thanks especially for being such a great email pal :)
-x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x--x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x-
It all started one cold and windy night…
Wait, no – actually, it was a rather nice and quiet night… Some might call it a peaceful night – you know, one of those infrequent ones where you don't wake up wanting to eradicate the entire planet of those damn screeching cats… (But that's a different story.) In other words, it was the perfect night for the perfect ninja to get a perfect night's sleep…
But… Alas - we all know that perfection does not exist!
Hence, 5 minutes later…
Knock knock knock knock knock!
Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock -
Sasuke threw open his front door and glared dangerously at his silver-haired sensei. Or more accurately – his former silver-haired sensei… Standing outside his front door. At 3am in the morning.
"If you want to train, then you're 18 hours too late…" he growled, extremely irritated at his stupid teacher for interrupting his much needed rest, especially since he had just gotten back from a 5 day mission…
A 5 day mission with severe lack of sleep!
"Neh… I'm hurt Sasuke-kun… Maybe I'm just 6 hours early, ne?" Kakashi grinned happily.
"Don't be stupid…" Sasuke muttered scathingly, his expression set into a permanent scowl. "You and early don't belong in the same sentence…"
"Aww I'm hurt…" the silver-haired jounin pouted, albeit un-cutely.
The dark-haired boy held back the urge to vomit all over the older man's shoes. No wonder why his ex-teacher was always late for their team meetings… He was way too happy and way too energetic for 3am Monday morning… It made him wonder what time the erratic shinobi usually went to bed…
Or whether he went to bed at all…
"So why the hell are you here?" Sasuke demanded in aggravation, unfazed by the fact that he had just thrown his infamous and impassive demeanour to the wind. Maybe he could act quite patient when needed to be, but god – he had never been tested at 3am before…!
"Ahh… Maybe I just wanted to see my favourite Uchiha…"
"Cut the bullshit…" the dark-haired boy suppressed the impulse to massage his temples in exasperation. God, sometimes he wondered how the hell the silver-haired man qualified to be a teacher… Did he somehow bribe the educational authorities or something?! Or were the people on the committee just extremely blind and stupid?
"Ah fine… Tsunade-sama told me to collect you…"
Sasuke's eyebrow twitched sporadically as he forced himself to remain calm. "At 3am in the morning?"
"Well… Ah…" Kakashi had the dignity to look sheepish. "I kinda got sidetracked and stuff so… I'm kinda a little late…"
"Well… Couldn't you have waited till morning?" the Uchiha muttered through clenched teeth, even as he smothered the intense urge to violently throttle his sensei. Surely he wouldn't be judged nor sentenced too harshly, especially since the victim was the silver-haired man… Anyway - it wasn't as if anyone actually liked him…
Hell – he might even get an award or something!
"Ah… You see… She said it was extremely important… And vital… And she emphasised the important part… Twice…"
The raven-haired boy felt his head start to throb dangerously. "If it was that important, then why the hell are you so late?"
Kakashi opened his mouth, as if about to explain –
"Actually, no… I don't want to know."
The copy ninja simply grinned.
-x- -x- -x-
Sasuke sat tiredly outside Tsunade's office as fingers twitched in impatience. It was now currently 3.15am – and he seriously felt as if he had just crawled out of his own grave. He glared hatefully at the thought of his sensei – how dare that moron drag him off his front doorstep without even giving him time to change out of his pyjamas…?!
Gah… Oh well – at least no one had seen him… He shuddered in fear as thoughts of the villagers laughing hysterically at his baby blue Pokémon pj's crept into his mind… He pouted defensively. So what if he wore embroidered Pikachu clothing to bed? They were on sale! And he was a ninja for god's sake – he didn't have time to waste, especially on silly mundane things such as shopping…!
Shaking his head in trepidation, the dark-haired boy began to wonder just why the Hokage wanted to see him… What could be so important that he had to be untimely dragged out of bed for? At 3am nonetheless?
Sasuke sighed as 'said moron' made his presence known – complete with a fresh new black eye. He glared at the copy ninja in annoyance. "Just what the hell is that?"
"Ahh… You see…" the silver haired man seemed to fidget on the spot. "Tsunade-sama was a little… uhmm… Irritated when I woke her up…"
The Uchiha rolled his eyes, before slumping noisily in defeat. He was too tired for this… His brain was too tired to handle all the stupidity… Might as well give up while ahead, right?
"But… Aah… She'll see you now… And… Uhmm… A word of warning…" Kakashi trailed off, before a sheepish grin plastered all over his face.
Sasuke raised an eyebrow in weariness.
"Don't comment on the state of her hair…" the jounin whispered solemnly, before disappearing with a quiet 'poof.'
-x- -x- -x-
Tsunade-sama – to put it bluntly – was not very pleased.
"I don't know what the hell is wrong with your teacher…" she yelled, oblivious to the fact that it was 3.15 in the morning, and that most normal people within Konoha were trying to get a decent night of sleep. "But for god's sake – even retards know the meaning of respect…! So what the hell does that make him?!"
Sasuke tried not to fall asleep in his seat as the legendary Sannin (with the very messy hair) rambled on and on… And on… And on… After all – he had heard variations of this speech many, many times… And no, he wasn't the slightest bit concerned about his sensei's eccentricity…
Nor his lack of responsibility…
And he definitely didn't care about his incompetence…
"SASUKE ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?!"
The Uchiha blinked in bewilderment. Huh? Did he miss something?
"Look…" the fifth Hokage murmured through clenched teeth, as she looked Sasuke straight in the eyes with an eerie sense of calm severity. "You probably want to be here just as much as I do… So let's get the formalities out of the way, and get straight to the point, so we can both go back to bed…"
The raven-haired boy merely nodded mutely, as tried his hardest not to compare Tsunade-sama's fluffy blonde hair to that of a well puffed baby chick.
"Basically… You just came back from a mission, ne?"
"Well – you have now just been removed from all duties until further notice."
Sasuke's eyes bulged out of his head as he snapped upright within his seat. "NANI?!"
"That means no missions, no mission-reports, no weekly patrol - "
"I know what that means!" the Uchiha almost yelled, his expression contorted into one of semi panic – which was really, really unexpected from the usually stoic boy. "But why?! Have I done something wrong?!"
"No… no…!" the fifth Hokage was quick to placate the half hysterical, half fuming boy. "We… Just… Have a somewhat… Uhmm… Call it a long-term mission if you will…"
Sasuke narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "I didn't sign up for any long-term missions…"
"Yeh… Well… Something's come up… And we think you're the best person for the job…" Tsunade-sama had the dignity to look sheepish, which immediately made the dark-haired boy feel uneasy…
What kind of 'job' could be so important that he had to be dragged out of bed at 3am for? And forcefully released from all duties nevertheless?
"Well… As you probably know, Naruto is due back from his 2-month assignment tomorrow at noon… We want you to collect him, and to take him back to your house. Look after him and make sure that - "
"You want me to baby-sit him?!" the Uchiha interrupted incredulously, his discomfort already increasing exponentially at the mere mention of the blonde-haired idiot. Naruto?! How the hell was Naruto involved?!
Sasuke immediately fell off his seat, and crashed to the floor with an almighty BANG. Baby-sit? Baby-sit Naruto? Was this some kind of sick joke?! And why the hell would the hyperactive prat need looking after anyway? After all - it wasn't as if he could get ill or injured - the Kyuubi's impressive healing abilities immediately eliminated all of those concepts…
And judging by the Hokage's stipulations, this person had to be off duty and available 24/7… Which comes to the crucial point - just why the hell would Naruto need someone around 24/7?! Sasuke shook his head wearily as he slowly climbed back onto his seat – too much in one night – he couldn't handle it anymore…!
It only took him a split-second to make up his mind.
To his credit, Tsunade-sama actually looked quite stunned at his adamant refusal. But the Uchiha didn't care – damn his cool demeanour and usual politeness to hell!
He wasn't stupid enough to get himself involved with anything that concerned a certain loud-mouthed klutz! Gah – just thinking about that blonde haired idiot was enough to start giving him a migraine…!
"Sasuke-kun…" the blonde-haired woman hesitated, as if choosing her words very, very carefully… "This isn't a question of your approval…"
Sasuke's eyes bulged out of his head for the second time that night. "NANI?!" Didn't all shinobi's have a choice as to whether they wanted to accept a long-term mission or not?! Why was this any different?! This was blatant 'employment inequity!' Where were the damn fair employment unions when you needed one?!
"I'm sorry Sasuke, but this is extremely important," Tsunade-sama's voice was grave and serious. "That 2-month mission we sent him on… Did you hear anything about it?"
It was a miracle that the Uchiha was even able to breathe - let alone answer - given that he was still trapped within a volatile state of shock. The injustice of the whole situation – it just wasn't fair! But being the perfect professional that he was, the dark-haired boy forced himself to stay focussed upon the current issues in hand… After all – the Hokage was still the Hokage… And the Hokage demanded a certain level of respect.
Even if she did look like a chicken.
"Yes…" Sasuke answered slowly and carefully, his wariness apparent upon his face. Even though the two ex-rivals hardly ever worked together anymore, they still saw each other around the village every now and again. "I heard it was a reconnaissance assignment or something…"
"Yes well… It was all fabricated."
If possible, Sasuke's expression became even more bewildered. Eh? A fabricated mission?! What the hell was she on about now?!
"You see… We had to… remove him away from the general population… So that we could study him more effectively -"
"Study?!" the dark-haired boy interrupted weakly. Sure he had always thought Naruto was some kind of animal – but to be assigned a 'fabricated mission' just to be studied?! This was beginning to sound too weird to be true…
This just had to be a dream!
"Well…" Tsunade-sama sighed. "What I'm about to tell you is strictly confidential, and you must promise not to disclose this information to another living soul, unless permitted by me. Do you understand?"
Sasuke suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. Who the hell was he going to tell anyway? His pet fish? "Yes, I understand," he answered dully.
"Well… It all started 3 months ago…"
-x- -x- -x-
Throughout the Hokage's speech, Sasuke's glare rapidly increased in intensity. The situation was beyond getting ridiculous – was he actually supposed to believe this nonsense?! God – he was Uchiha Sasuke – he wasn't that gullible damn it! Maybe this was some kind of test? Some kind of new exam?
But damn it – why the hell did Naruto have to be involved?
"So do you understand the situation now?" Tsunade murmured, even as she rubbed her eyes in irritated sleepiness. It was strange – he had never expected 'her' to be one to play practical jokes… Naruto yes… But the Hokage herself? He sighed in defeat - Well… You learn new things every day…
"So basically," the dark-haired boy muttered sarcastically. "The Kyuubi inside of Naruto is female… And his puberty phase somehow caused her to prematurely enter her mating season?"
"That's not possible," Sasuke interjected in annoyance. Ah that must be it! Maybe this was some kind of test on demon characteristics!! Ha ha ha!
A small smile graced the blonde's woman's lips. "And why not, Sasuke-kun?"
"Firstly – factual evidence from the past shows that humans and demons have never bonded nor connected outside of the seal. Unless there happened to be a life threatening cause or situation, the demon will continue to remain dormant and separated from the human host," the dark-haired boy half stated, half recited with an almost bored tone. "And since puberty can hardly be defined as life-threatening, whatever hormonal transformation Naruto has or will experience, will NOT affect the Kyuubi. What you're saying is technically impossible."
The Hokage raised an eyebrow in mild curiosity. This Sasuke kid sure knew his stuff – although he was missing one extremely crucial factor… Naruto wasn't like 'everyone else' – his tie with the Kyuubi had been growing exponentially ever since the seal was performed… And at the moment, she was willing to bet that their connection surpassed any other man-demon relationship in the past… She wouldn't be surprised if one day the two beings completely merged…
That Naruto… Always so full of surprises…
"And secondly…" this time, the Uchiha managed a small smug smile. "What you explained isn't possible because Naruto hasn't entered puberty yet. And I doubt he ever will."
Tsunade rolled her eyes. "Look, we wouldn't be making such a fuss about it if we didn't think it was important. And no matter what you say, we're still going to take precautions."
"But this is a waste of time and money!"
"It may be so…" the Hokage answered as a matter-of-factly. "But what if it wasn't?"
"Well what's the worst that could happen?" Sasuke demanded stubbornly. Gah why was Naruto so damn troublesome?!
"Ah I'm glad you finally asked…" Tsunade's eyes glinted predatorily, sending unwanted shivers down the dark-haired boy's spine. Gehh… What was she up to now?! "Well… Do you know what happens when a fox goes into heat?"
Sasuke pondered the question for a split second, before answering effortlessly off the top of his head. "Increased energy, raised metabolism… Possible bouts of insomnia, restlessness and increased sexual cravings -"
"Bingo," the blonde woman smirked knowingly.
The Uchiha frowned. Although the thought of Naruto having any kind of sex life made him feel extremely nauseous, he was sure the idiot could handle it. He could suppress the symptoms, right?! He HAD to suppress the symptoms!! Otherwise… Otherwise it'll jus be too gross!! "How difficult could it be? He's suffered much worse!"
"I'm not finished! Now… Think of a demon fox… One with unrestrained power and energy, and the relentless desire to cause destruction and pain… What does that spell out for you?"
Black eyes blinked blankly. Damn – maybe this was more dangerous than he had originally thought? "You think that the fox will try to take control of Naruto's body?"
"No, no, no…" Tsunade shook her head vehemently. Why does everyone always underestimate the loud-mouthed brat? To keep the Kyuubi under control took a lot more willpower than some people seemed to take for granted…!
Sasuke looked on in mild puzzlement.
"OK imagine you were the fox, and you were kept from the thing you loved the most… How would you feel?"
The raven-haired boy frowned. How the hell did this question having anything to do with anything?! "I guess I'd be a bit angry…"
"Ok, what if there was absolutely nothing you could do about it?"
"Hmm… Frustrated I suppose…"
"Bingo!" The Hokage's eyes adopted that unnatural gleam again, causing goose pimples to rise up upon Sasuke's arms. "Now how would you help relieve some of that frustration?"
"I'd go training," the Uchiha answered automatically. What a stupid question. Training was the universal answer to everything! A legendary Sannin - of all people - should've definitely known that!!
"No, you're the fox remember?" Tsunade seemed slightly aggravated, causing more uncomfortable prickles to crawl down Sasuke's neck. "You can't go training – in fact, you can't do anything that involves fighting nor combat."
The dark-haired boy paused in silent contemplation, before his eyes bulged out of his head once again.
"You mean he's going to start running around and screwing all the foxes he can find?!" the Uchiha half gasped, half choked out. Indecent images were now rapidly forming within his mind, and he began to feel more than a little sick. Naruto with a red fox… Naruto touching the red fox… Naruto with his trousers down… Naruto… ARGHHH Nooooo!! His poor little mind! The corruption - it hurts!! It hurts!!
"No baka!" the Hokage yelled angrily, as a vein started to pulse sporadically at her right temple. Sasuke might've been offended at being called a baka, if he weren't feeling so damn disgusted. "Naruto's human – he's human damn it!! In other words, he's going to go round screwing other humans! Get it?!"
The dark-haired boy frowned, albeit weakly - the image of Naruto with other girls was even worse! "But that's not possible either… You see – all the girls in the village find Naruto revolting… Besides – I don't think the baka knows what 'sex' is…"
Tsunade-sama suppressed the urge to throttle the Uchiha. Wasn't this boy supposed to be intelligent?! He was supposed to be a genius damn it! God, if this was the standard of the village, then maybe she should just give up now and retire! In fact – if this was the foundation of Konoha's future, maybe she should migrate ASAP!!
"Sasuke…" she muttered through clenched teeth. "Have you seen Naruto recently?"
The dark-haired boy frowned. The last time he saw the blonde idiot was about 2 months ago… And to be honest, he couldn't recall noticing any dramatic transformations between Naruto-now, and Naruto from 4 years back… Sure the hyperactive klutz was a little taller, a little broader… Yes, he lost his baby-fat, and so what if he had a decent body? His hair was still wildly untameable, his eyes still that indescribable blue…
And most importantly, he was still damn annoying and irritable as hell!
"In case you haven't noticed," Tsunade-sama muttered, with a glare. "Naruto has grown up to be a very fine young man. In fact – he's been becoming more and more popular with the female inhabitants of the village…"
Sasuke's expression remained blank, effectively concealing his underlying shock. Naruto… Popular? With girls? Was that even possible?! Was everyone on drugs?!
"OK… So he's going to go around and screw all the girls?"
"Yes!" the blonde woman exclaimed with a huge sigh of relief. "You finally understand!"
The Uchiha remained nonplussed. Even if it was disgusting, Naruto's sex life had absolutely nothing to do with him! And he was intending to keep it that way! "Ok… And the problem with that is…?"
The Hokage glared fiercely.
"Ok , ok, just hear me out, cos I'm still a little confused…" Sasuke muttered. Geez – women could be scary when they wanted to be. "So you're telling me that Naruto going through puberty has somehow triggered a parallel response in the Kyuubi's spirit, causing the fox to go into heat… And that due to the suppressed destructional urges of the demon, the accumulated frustration has somehow manifested into intense lust, and sexual desire…?"
"Yes." The answer was short and flippant.
"Ok, and now I ask you again - what does that have to do with me?"
"You're going to look after him!" Tsunade answered naturally, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "Someone has to be there, in case something happens… After all, we don't know the full extent of his situation at the moment, so we need someone with him at all times…"
"But why me?"
"Because you're the closest to him!"
"Why not Sakura? Or Kakashi-sensei?"
"Sakura's a girl… And Kakashi…" the blonde woman trailed off, as her eyebrow twitched erratically. "Well… You of all people should know about your sensei's incompetence. And knowing that retard, he'd probably try to encourage Naruto's behaviour."
"How long is his syndrome going to last?" He was beginning to panic now…
"Don't know," the female Sannin smiled sweetly.
Sasuke sighed pitifully. "And if I say no?"
"Then goodbye ninja career!" Tsunade smirked, with unrestrained glee. Ah – sometimes being Hokage could be sooo rewarding!!
"So when do I pick him up?" the Uchiha muttered, shoulders slumped in defeat. Great – just great…! Now he had to spend days, weeks… Maybe months with a sexually frustrated blonde idiot. Gah – if he was annoying normally, then imagine how irritating he'd be if he were frustrated?! He had a sinking feeling that his life was suddenly going to get a little more difficult…
Little did he know just how much.
-x- -x- -x-
At exactly 12 noon the following day, a very irritable Uchiha Sasuke sat glaring at Konoha's entrance. The blonde idiot was late. He scanned the surrounding area and found absolutely nothing. Great, just great…! Damn the Hokage for keeping him up till 6am going over their stupid mission parameters…! Could life get any more annoying?!
He sighed in frustration as he recited the 3 most important rules within his head, even though he was fairly confident he knew them all off by heart.
'Number 1: No one, not even Naruto, is to know about the true situation.'
To be honest, he found that rule rather stupid. Surely the idiot had a right to know what was happening to him?
'Number 2: Naruto must not participate in any form of sexual endeavours until more information is gathered.'
Sasuke grimaced distastefully. That wasn't going to be hard right? Like anyone would willingly sleep with the loud-mouthed moron! And gah – getting involved with the blonde's sex life was definitely not his idea of a pleasant assignment.
'Number 3: Naruto must be kept away from the female population at night.'
That was supposedly when the 'urges' were at their most powerful – especially on nights with a full moon. Something to do with lunacy and tides – something ridiculous like that.
Gah – never before had he ever been so glad to be male-
The Uchiha fell over onto his back as a blur of blonde and bright orange suddenly tackled him head on. Gah – so fast! Where did he-?!
"Yo Sasuke!" Naruto grinned down at his ex-rival from atop of him, his bright blue eyes shining teasingly. "You miss me?"
"What?!" the dark-haired boy spluttered incredulously. What the hell was the idiot on about? Miss him?! Never!! Was he crazy?!
"I asked if you missed me!" the blonde grinned jovially, still straddling the Uchiha's lap in a rather provocative way. This did not go unnoticed by the taller boy.
"Get off me baka!" Sasuke muttered angrily, even as he tried to wriggle his way out from under the hyperactive boy. Gah, when did the fool get so damn heavy anyway?! And what if someone saw them like this?! They might start thinking something! Che – did the blonde have neither self preservation nor dignity?!
"Aww, you're no fun!" Naruto pouted cutely as he hopped off the dark-haired boy's lap, brushing intently against his groin in the process. Sasuke tried to ignore the sudden loss in body warmth, even as his heart pounded furiously within his chest. What the hell was happening now? Why was he feeling so… so… uncomfortable? And so… so… so damn hot?
Black eyes snapped alert in shock, as the dark-haired boy stumbled unsteadily onto his feet. Naruto… What was Naruto… Was Naruto doing something to him? Something didn't feel right… Something… Everything felt unbalanced…
"Uhm… Sasuke… Are you ok? You're looking kinda ill…"
No… He wasn't ok… He felt unstable, disorientated… It was hot… When did it suddenly get so hot…?
The Uchiha flinched visibly as the blonde boy took a curious step forward. He felt as if he were drowning, and yet deep inside he still welcomed the pull of the current. His pulse and breathing rate had both rapidly increased… Everything felt suffocating, overwhelming… And yet so damn exciting and intense at the same time…
Those eyes… When did they…? When did they ever become so blue? And those lips… Those soft, pink lips… Slightly parted in invitation… As if begging to be touched… As if begging to be kissed…
If only he leaned in a little closer, he could just about reach those -
"ARGHHH!! GET AWAY FROM ME YOU BAKA!"
"WHAT?!" A furious and confused Naruto entered the shouting contest.
"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU STANDING SO CLOSE TO ME?! YOU TRYING TO COP A FEEL OR SOMETHING?!"
"Kyaaaaaa!! I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU, YOU UNGRATEFUL BASTARD!"
And so the insults continued, until a rather red-faced Sasuke stomped away, with a persistent and irate blonde tailing him close behind. Naruto had sure learnt some rather creative swear words in the past few years, and he wasn't afraid to demonstrate his new found skill either…!
But more surprisingly… Just what the hell had almost happened? Did he almost kiss the blonde-haired idiot? And why the fuck would he do that?! The mere thought of touching the moron made him sick to the stomach, let alone the thought of kissing him!
The dark-haired boy suppressed a sigh as he continued to walk towards the village centre. The severe lack of sleep and all the talk about hormones must be starting to affect his mentality. Yeh that had to be it… Why else would he even consider kissing the blue eyed prat? His lips were horribly chapped, and he'd probably still somehow taste disgustingly like ramen (even if he hadn't eaten it for days…) He was almost certainly a terrible kisser, probably even worse than he was 4 years ago…
But then again… Maybe his lips would still be as soft? And still just as swe-
'GAHHH!!' Sasuke screamed hysterically within his mind. It was official!! He had cracked – his mind had completely cracked!! Something was terribly wrong with his brain!! And yet, throughout all the madness, he still had a sinking feeling that things were going to become much, much worse…
Little did he know just how much.
-x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x-
Whee that was just the prologue lol. It gets much more 'fun' later on haha.Of course, our beloved Sasuke-kun won't have it that easily... Obviously he's going to be attracted to Naruto... Duh!! and our lil blonde will continue to play the oblivious temptress! Oh, and did I mention that loads of other people will be vying for our kitsune's attention?? Ooh Sasuke's got competition!! =p
So whatdya think? Carry the idea on? Or forget it and start something else??
Ooh wanna join the mailing list? then mail me lol. ;) or leave me a review with ya email in it!! Ja ne!