The Joy of Fatherhood

Part 2

Wedded Bliss.


Carrot blinked as he stepped out of the hotel room he and his new
wife had gotten for the weekend. It was in a fairly nice hot springs
just outside of Tokyo. Things had been going reasonably well, and on
Tuesday, he'd be back in school again.

Nodoka was somewhat traditional in many ways, in others, he wasn't
exactly certain if she was even human. The woman had somehow gotten it
into her head that he was some sort of insatiable pervert. "At least
she's not into that bondage stuff. I don't know how much more I can
take though."

"Carrot?" said a familiar voice.

He looked up and simply stared at the man in front of him. "Soun?"

"What are you doing here?" they said in unison, much to the
amusement of the young girl standing next to Soun.

"Honeymoon. You?" replied Carrot lazily.

"The same actually," muttered Soun as he coughed into his hand

"Really? You told me you were engaged, but..." said Carrot in
genuine surprise.

"Well, yes. This is my wife, Kimiko Tendo," said Soun as he
presented his wife to Carrot.

"Oh, is this a friend of yours?" said the woman with a small
oblivious looking smile.

"Uh, yes ma'am," replied Carrot as Soun floundered for the answer
for a moment.

"Yes, quite so. My name is Tendo now, by the way."

"Oh? You too huh? My new name is Saotome."

"Well, perhaps we should get together later, for dinner or
something?" said Soun cheerfully.

"Yes, I'd like that," said Carrot calmly as Soun ushered his wife
away. He raised his eyebrow slightly as he saw her profile from the
side. The girl was slightly pregnant, and was holding her hand
tentatively against the small of her back already. "Hmmm, that must be

"Genma, darling!" said a familiar voice. Carrot turned to see
Nodoka skipping up to him cheerfully. She was still wet from the
springs, and dressed in a yukata.

"Hello, dear," said the boy with a weak smile.

"I was looking for you," she said as she walked up beside him and
took his arm.

"Actually, I was looking for you too," he said as he managed to
straighten up a bit.


"Yes, I'm getting hungry, so I thought we might eat together," he
said cheerfully.

"That would be nice, I was just starting to think about lunch
myself. Wow, we must be more alike than I thought!"

Carrot winced slightly at this. "Er, honey? I'm always hungry,
see?" He pat his belly for emphasis and smiled at her gently.

"Oh, oh my," she said as she looked down at his gut.

"Come on, dear," said Genma as he led her towards their room.


"Fancy meeting you here, Saotome," said Soun as he walked into the
hot springs a few hours later.

"Hello, Tendo," said Carrot with a small nod.

"How is your wife?" said Soun cheerfully.

"Huh? Oh, fine I guess, she's over in the woman's side right now,"
said Carrot with a small cheerful smile. "I can tell this is going to
take some getting used to. I've always been a bit of a loner, now I've
got to start thinking about both of us."

"Huh? Oh yes, you just met your wife. It must be hard on her,"
commented Soun with a serious nod.

"Actually, she seems to be having the time of her life. I'm the
one who's having trouble adjusting to this. It was all just so fast,
plus, she somehow decided that I'm some kind of pervert!" Carrot hung
his head as he said this and sighed.

"That doesn't sound so bad," commented Soun with a wistful smile.

"It's not, physically, I'm having the time of my life. Mentally
I'm trying to figure out what happened to me still. Nodoka can seem so
oblivious at times."

"Well, you'll come around. You seem to be getting along well. I'm
sure she'll make a fine wife," said Soun with a cheerful pat.

Carrot looked over at him and smirked. "I'm just hoping she
doesn't turn into her mother in law. That woman is scary."

"Actually, I agree with you. My mother in law had a nodachi
sitting across her lap throughout the whole ceremony," said Soun with
a heavy sigh.

"Nodachi?" Carrot looked over at the man in surprise. "Wow, you
got me beat, mine just had a katana."

"So, you got your wife pregnant too did you?" said Soun with a
little understanding crossing his features.

"Actually no. You were there the first time I met her two days
ago. Remember?" said Carrot with a slightly nervous chuckle. "I think
her mother is a bit impatient."

"I guess it's just me then," muttered Soun with a sad look in his

"Cheer up ,Tendo, I would have gotten Nodoka pregnant early given
half the chance. I just never did get the chance," said Carrot as he
pat the man on his back.

"Thanks ,Saotome! You don't know how much that means to me!" said
Soun with tears in his eyes

"Relax ,Tendo, I'm sure we'll both be fine," lied Carrot.

"Saotome..." said Soun as he suddenly became calm again.


"What do you say? Would you like know...?" said the man

"What? Here?" said Carrot as he looked around in confusion.

"Why not? We both need to blow off a little steam, and our wives
aren't going to object at the moment," said Soun with a serious nod.

Carrot blinked as he noticed that the men, who had once surrounded
them in the water, were now all sitting comfortably on the opposite
side of the spring. "What's with them?"

"I'm not sure..." said Soun as he shrugged his shoulders.

"Right, let's go then," said Carrot as he stood up and grabbed a
towel. Soun followed him out of the springs and into the changing


"Hiyah!" cried Carrot as he landed from a jump kick that sent Soun
sprawling across the ground. The man sat up and smiled dumbly as he
dusted himself off and readied himself again.

"That was a good shot ,Saotome!"

"Quite so ,Tendo!" agreed Carrot as he smirked and prepared to
attack again. "Ready?"

"Ready!" said Soun as he started to rush forward.

"What the hell is going on here?" said an angry sounding voice
from behind Carrot.

Soun went pale and shrank back under a gaze that Carrot knew they
were both receiving at the moment. "Uh oh..."

Saotome slowly turned to see Kimiko and Nodoka standing side by
side, glaring at the both of them. Each wife moved as if
choreographed, rushing up to her husband's side and twisting his ear,
dragging them both off to their respective rooms.


"Having a good time?" said Carrot with a look that told Nodoka
that he hoped it was the right answer.

"Beating up another man is fun?" snapped Nodoka angrily.

"But, that's Tendo! We do this sort of thing all the time!"

"You invited one of your friends to stop by for our honeymoon?"
said Nodoka with her eyebrow twitching slightly. She seemed to be
grabbing for something at her waist that wasn't there absently.

"What? No!" cried Carrot as he pulled the futon up in front of
himself in a vain attempt to hide from his wife. "It's just a
coincidence! I swear!"

"It had better be!" snarled Nodoka angrily as she calmed slightly.

"It is! He got married the same day we did! He's here for the same
reason as us! I didn't even know about it until we got here!"

"Very well," said Nodoka, as she seemed to accept this finally.

"Yes dear?" said the man pathetically from behind the futon.

"Leave the dogi on, we're going to play 'wandering martial artist'

"Can't we just have sex? I can never get into this role playing

"No, now try to remember your lines," said Nodoka as she unfolded
her futon on the ground again.

"Yes dear..." grumbled Carrot as he kicked at the dirt.


"So, you're still alive too?" said Soun as he took a swig of a
large bottle of sake. He was sitting on the outside steps of the small
hotel, drinking alone.

"Yeah," said Genma as he sat down next to him, with his own bottle
in his hand. His dogi hung from his body in tatters, but still covered
enough of him to be decent.

"Women," muttered Soun.

"Yup...'Wandering martial artist, and lonely housewife'. You?"
asked Genma lazily as he took a swig from his own bottle.

"Evil shogunate warlord, and slave," muttered Soun as he picked up
the a nearby samurai helmet off the ground.

"Here's to the women," said Genma as he raised his bottle.

"And their husbands," said Soun as he tapped it with his own.

"Soun, come back to bed," said a feminine voice from behind the
men. They both turned to see Kimiko standing in the door of the hotel.
She turned to walk back, and paused, turning her head slightly. "Bring
the helmet."

"Yes dear," said Soun as he jumped to his feet and followed after

"Well, I've known her for three days, and I'm as whipped as he is.
Downright pathetic," commented Carrot as he stood up and walked back
to his own room.


"There's someone I want you to meet. He's a great uncle of mine,"
said Nodoka as she sat across from him in their room.

"No couldn't be..." muttered Carrot to himself.

"He's a grandmaster of a very powerful form of martial arts, and
his name is Happosai," continued Nodoka with a very formal look about

"Uh, dear...this man...why do you want me to meet him?" said
Carrot warily.

"You wish to be a martial artist? I shall support you, he has told
me he will take you as his student if you wish," said Nodoka calmly.

Genma froze in complete terror. The tone implied that it wasn't
really a choice, and the real Genma Saotome would have caved in an
instant. "Honey, I appreciate that you are willing to support

"However?" said Nodoka with an arched eyebrow. It was obvious she
wasn't expecting opposition from the man she had been feeding a steady
diet of sex to over the past few days. According to her mother, that,
and a serious and formal tone, would be enough to break him. Having a
weapon with you would also help; perhaps that is what she was missing.

"Look, I'd like to see how far I can go on my own, before I seek
the training of a Grandmaster. A man like that wouldn't have time to
teach me the basics really."

"But, you have already have training," pointed out Nodoka.

"A red belt in Tai kwon do isn't training," said Carrot in retort,
secretly he was relieved that he'd never certified his kenpo training.
"Look, I want to learn a real martial art, but I need a little time.
I'll seek out the help of a grandmaster when I can't go any farther.
With Soun's help, I should do fine."

Nodoka pursed her lips and frowned. It had to be the sword; she
needed a sword to get her way. "Very well husband, I shall send word
that you do not feel you are ready yet."

Carrot had to stop himself from sighing with relief.

"Come husband, Kimiko has offered to have us with her and her
husband for dinner," said Nodoka calmly as she stood up.

"Hey, great!" said Carrot cheerfully as he stood up. Disagreeing
with Nodoka was harder than it first appeared to be.


"I feel so fat," whispered Kimiko to her husband.

Carrot froze suddenly and slowly moved a little further away from
the table before Soun opened his mouth.

"Of course dear, you're pregnant! It's only natural that you gain
a little weight! You'll be fine!" said the boy obliviously.

Nodoka noticed her husband inching away from the table, and
clamped her hand down on his knee, preventing him from moving away any

"Insensitive bastard!" cried Kimiko as she broke into tears and
turned away from Soun.

"Nonsense dear, you look fine," said Nodoka cheerfully. Using the
same fake cheerfulness that she had fooled Carrot with when they first
met. She turned her head towards her husband and smiled at him, while
clawing at his leg in warning. "Right dear?"

Carrot nodded vigorously. "Of course! She's absolutely beautiful!
Look dear, doesn't she just seem to glow? Why, I'm absolutely jealous
Tendo," He turned his head and saw Nodoka twitching, apparently he'd
laid it on a little too thick. "I overdid it?" he asked her out loud.

"Wahhhhh! A stranger thinks I'm more beautiful than my own
husband!" cried Kimiko as she turned and started to beat Soun in the
chest lightly as she cried.

Soun was starting to cry himself. "Saotome! How could you!?"

"Well, maybe she could stand to lose a few pounds," muttered
Carrot in a desperate, and incredibly stupid attempt to make up for
over doing it.

Nodoka was starting to turn red, and Soun simply cried with his
wife, who had stopped just long enough to look back at Carrot again.

"I'll just sit here and be quiet now," said Carrot softly as he
hung his head.


"Well, it's the third night, and we've already been kicked out by
our wives," commented Carrot as he sat outside and watched the snow
fall to the ground lightly.

"This is all your fault, Saotome!" grumbled Soun angrily.

"It's the fault of our stupid mouths, and your wife's hormones.
Besides, we're both out here, so you aren't suffering alone you know."

"You're right, Saotome," muttered Soun dejectedly.

"Well, Tendo, shall we?" said Carrot as he pointed out to the snow
as it slowly drifted to the ground outside.

"Huh? It's freezing, Saotome!"

"We'll freeze to death if we just sit here, we'll do a little
workout and then go into the springs again," said Carrot with a small
shrug. "Come on, we want to be masters of the art someday, we gotta
start training now."

"You're right, Saotome!" agreed Soun. "For the art!"

"For the art!" agreed Carrot as he stood up and walked out into
the snow.

The resulting noise woke everyone up in the middle of the night,
and promptly got both families thrown out of the hot springs.


Next time: Suffering for the art.

This fic will be updated approximately 'whenever I feel like it'
which should be once a month. So, unlike my others, it will not be on
a constant writing schedule