Conversations With the Hat

By Anterastilis

Summary: Everyone has been sorted at one time in their lives. What did various characters hear when they were being sorted?

Rating: G

Gryffindor: Minerva McGonagall

"McGonagall, Minerva!" the deputy Headmaster's voice rang through the hall and young Minerva scampered up to the stool where she had the Hat placed on her head.

"Hello, my dear," the Hat said into her head.

"Hello!" Minerva chirped at the Hat.

"My, but you are a bright little thing, aren't you?" the Hat observed. "Where shall I put you?"

At that, Minerva sobered. "I don't know," she replied primly, folding her hands into her lap. "That's your job, isn't it?"

The Hat chuckled. "So it is, child, so it is. Well, let's see what you've got, shall we? Hmm... Much too straight-forward to be a Slytherin. Very loyal I see. You'd do well in Hufflepuff."

Minerva wrinkled her nose, but kept quiet.

"Ah, don't like that, do you? Very well then. Ravenclaw, or, perhaps, Gryffindor? What do you think, my dear?" the Hat asked again, desperately trying to get Minerva's input. For students such as this, the Hat rarely liked making a unilateral decision.

Minerva frowned slightly. "I don't know," she replied firmly.

"Well, well, well. You're quite clever, but... Ah... What's this?" The Hat quieted for a moment and searched through the memories that had just come up. "Well, my dear, I see that there is only one place for you... GRYFFINDOR!"

Ravenclaw: Filius Flitwick

"Flitwick, Filius!" the deputy Headmaster's voice rang through the Great Hall as he called for the next of the newest students to be sorted.

Young Filius, even shorter in stature than he would be when Harry would be a student, hurried up to sit on the stool where the famous Sorting Hat nearly swallowed his head.

"Hello," greeted the Hat.

"Hello," Filius' mental voice squeeked at the Hat, just a wee bit nervous.

The Hat mentally chuckled to itself. "Well, there are two places for you, lad... I see that you can go into Hufflepuff -- you're really very loyal, I see. But... ah, yes, you've got quite a mind. Know quite a lot of charms for your age, don't you? Quite the studious one you are."

"Oh yes," breathed Filius excitedly. "It's really quite a fascinating subject -- there's so much to learn!"

"All right, all right," the Hat replied quickly -- before Filius could get too excited. "I see there's only one choice for you after all... RAVENCLAW!"

Hufflepuff: Pomona Sprout

"Sprout, Pomona," the Deputy Headmaster called the name of the next new first year with a tired air -- this year's class was just a little bigger than usual, and he was already having nightmares about what trouble they would start.

Eleven-year old Pomona Sprout walked shyly up to the stool and sat down. The Deputy Headmaster placed the Hat on her head and stood back.

"Hello there, lass," the Hat greeted Pomona cheerfully.

"Hullo!" she greeted the Hat in an equally cheerful tone.

"Well, well, if it isn't the latest Sprout to come along. Your father was quite the Herbologist, you know."

"I know," Pomona replied solemnly, "he worked very hard at what he did."

"And I see that he passed that trait along to you," replied the Hat lightly. He hummed to himself for a moment or two as he searched through Pomona's mind. "You're very loyal, aren't you? Willing to stick to your friends no matter what. Good, good, that is excellent."

Pomona giggled nervously at the Hat's words.

"Well my dear, just as with your father before you, there's only one place for you... HUFFLEPUFF!"

Slytherin: Severus Snape

"Snape, Severus!" McGonagall's voice rang through the Great Hall as she called for young Severus to be sorted. A small boy with greasy hair that was just longer than appropriate for a boy his age in the wizarding world walked almost hesitantly up to the stool and sat down. McGonagall placed the Hat gently on his head.

"Well, well, a half-blood Prince, eh?" the Hat said by way of greeting. "You've got quite a history, boy," it added.

Severus scowled at the mention of his heritage and didn't reply. Of course he knew what his history was! Bloody hat...

"Well, Princes have been Ravenclaws and Slytherins alike through the ages. All things told, you might be better suited to Ravenclaw." The Hat was a little too firm for Severus' liking on that point.

But then the Hat spoke again: "I see here that there's the potential for something... more?" The Hat sounded surprised. "Well, there is a quality I wouldn't have expected in the last Prince. There's quite a bit of bravery in you, lad!"

Severus shuddered, almost imperceptibly, but the Hat being the Hat caught the motion. "Not Gryffindor, eh? Well, if you're sure..." Severus nodded silently. "...Better be SLYTHERIN!"