Amon and Laundry v 2.0 by Aisling-Niamh
Disclaimer: Ais does not own anything you recognize.
This is the re-posting of A&L, with some changes, small or large, because Ais is never satisfied with anything she does, apparently. Thank you to everyone who reviewed v 1.0! I haven't been around in so long because of jobs and school and various other things.
Amon stood staring in desperation at three very large hampers overflowing with various kinds of black cloth. He had nothing to wear. Literally nothing to wear. He'd worn the same outfit for four days, and tomorrow was Febreeze time. Touko had done his laundry until very recently; before that he had just thrown everything in the Laundromat machine and put it on hot with way too much soap. Then he'd had to buy new clothes all the time. They kept shrinking, and he kept running out of money. Even before that his brother and mother had done all the laundry.
But now he was alone. There was nobody left to do his laundry; they had all abandoned him. Well, that wasn't entirely true. He could ask Nagira but he sure as hell wasn't about to. Nagira was an expert at teasing even his brooding younger brother. It almost made him wish he hadn't broken up with Touko—if their relationship hadn't exactly been good, he had gotten clean, normal-sized clothes out of the deal. He wondered sometimes
He knew he was just procrastinating on the much more urgent and distressing problem at hand.
"I don't have enough money to buy another complete wardrobe again! Maybe I should go buy that Febreeze now" he said out loud, for once not muttering. But then he had an inspiration. He would ask somebody from the STN-J to help him.
Amon quickly got a roll of extra-large plastic trash bags and some twisties, and began methodically moving all his clothes from the three huge hampers to the trash bags, and twisting them carefully closed. He stripped all the (black) bedding from his bed and bagged it too, and even searched under the bed for (black) dirty socks. He remembered to check the bathroom for used (black) towels.
All in all, it amounted to six very full bags. He sat down on the floor in the middle of them and sighed. What now?
He could ask Robin... No, he couldn't ask Robin. He didn't know why, but he couldn't. It would be about as bad as asking Nagira, he reasoned. Ugh. Robin, with her weird hair, with her glasses always way too far down on her nose, her beautiful emerald eyes like that one really good scene in The Wizard of Oz
Amon thwacked his head. Hard.
Let's see. He could ask Sakaki... but Sakaki probably got Doujima or some girlfriend, landlady, or sister he didn't know about to do everything for him.
Speaking of Doujimaâ€ No, she couldn't keep a secret if her life depended on it, and it was very embarrassing to not be able to do laundry...he really didn't want it to get out. His credibility as a Hunter could be called into question!
Michael seemed pretty self-sufficient and he could probably keep a secret. But of course he couldn't exactly leave...
The Chief and Zaizen were immediately crossed off the list for obvious reasons. Amon gave the Signature Amon Frown. Like hell was he asking Hattori for anything.
It was either back to Robin or... wasn't he forgetting something?
Oh yeah! Karasuma! Of course! He'd worked with her the longest, he knew she could keep secrets, he wasn't romantically attached to her in any way (which seemed rare anymore), she would know better than to make fun of him like some idiots he knew –coughsakakicough-- ...and of course she could do laundry.
He pulled the Great Black Audi from the black garage and into the driveway, popping the trunk.
Amon was frustrated. Only three of the six (black) bags of dirty (black) laundry would fit in the Great Black Audi's trunk! And to make matters worse, the old neighbor lady stuck her head out the door.
"Mr. Amon, if you have that much trash, then why don't you just put it out on the curb instead of taking it to the dump? Are you remodeling? It's about time, with all that black! Don't you ever get tired of it? My cousin Effie"
Amon shivered, shoved the rest of the bags in the back seat, slammed all the doors and the trunk, and peeled out of the driveway as fast as he could.
Amon saw that Michael was the only one around when he arrived at the STN-J.
"Where's Karasuma?" he asked shortly.
Michael didn't hear him. Once again, loud American hard rock music was blasting out of his headphones as he sat in front of his computer doing God-knows-what.
"Michael. Michael! MICHAEL!"
"Huh? Did you say something, Mr. Amon?"
"TURN YOUR MUSIC DOWN!"
"If you don't talk louder, I'll have to turn my music down."
Amon muttered under his breath and shot Michael the Patented Amon Death Glare.
"Uh—Oh! You mean turn the music down! Gotcha!"
Michael received another Death Glare for good measure. "Where is everybody?"
"Let's see—Haruto and Miss Doujima went on a Hunt."
"Sakaki and Doujima?"
"Miss Karasuma called in sick today. She said she has a really bad case of scry-induced flu, whatever that means. And Robin's doing some research in the conference room."
"Are you okay, Mr. Amon?"
"Fine. Just fine."
Robin sat at her seat in the conference room, flipping through the witch's bio for the hundredth time. There was nothing to do. Karasuma was sick, Haruto and Doujima were on a Hunt and they didn't seem to want her along, Amon was uncharacteristically late, and she didn't want to bother Michael anymore. The day was so slow they might as well all go home.
"Amon?" He had appeared behind her suddenly.
"I need you to do something for me."
He leaned closer and looked in her eyes.
Robin's heart: THUMPthumpTHUMPthumpTHUMPthump
"Can you keep a secret?"
"I need you to do my laundry."
Robin's mouth dropped open several feet. "Excuse me?"
Amon glanced around nervously. "My laundry," he whispered. "I can't do it myself. Don't tell anybody!"
Then, to retain his Badassness, he shot a death glare at various unidentified spots around the room.
"Your laundry." Oh jeez. "Er... this is a definitely a side of you I can safely say I've never seen, Amon."
You probably didn't notice, being as it hasn't been updated in centuries, but I pulled down New Life, my 'serious fic,' for revision. Expect a Noir fanfic at some point, too.
There seem to be some format problems, so if there's any weird random things that don't make sense, that's what it is. I mean, like more than usual. --rolls eyes--