5. The Phantom of the Opera.
Scene 1. Take 1
Enter Raven pushing an elderly Mad Mod into the theatre ruins.
Mad Mod. "I don't like it here. I want to go to the park. I want to feed the duckies!" Hits Raven with stick.
Raven. Rolls eyes. "Remind me again how he agreed to do this?"
Robin. "He didn't. We just stole his hearing aids."
Mad Mod. "Hello?…..Hello?" Hits Raven again.
Cyborg. "Okay, how much for this green lamp?"
Raven. Points to Mad Mod. "I think he wants it."
Cyborg. "Anyone else? No? Okay sold to-"
Robin. "-I'll give you my whole titan girl shower videos, including all local hotties such as Blackfire and Jinx!"
Cyborg. Eyes widen. "SOLD!"
Raven and Starfire look at each other. Shake their heads then walk off. Green lamp turns into a giant green T.V.
BB. "Play the tapes!"
Boys gather around television.
Mad Mod. "Hello? I want to see the duckies!…..hello?"
BB and Raven stand on a stage.
BB. "Dude we're buying this supposedly haunted theatre….. Cyborg you have to be on stage!"
Cyborg voice over."I am NOT coming out."
Raven. "It can't be that bad."
Cyborg enters the stage dressed in a pink frilly dress and large white wig.
Cyborg. "Why do I have to be Carlotta?"
Raven. "Because no way in hell am I putting that dress on!"
BB is on the floor in a fit of giggles. Pauses."I think I have to go to the bathroom." Runs off.
Raven rolls her eyes."Lets get this scene over with." Makes something heavy fall on Cyborg.
Cyborg. "That's it I'm leaving."
Raven. "oh….no. We have lost the leading lady. What ever shall we do now?"
Robin leaps on stage. "I know lets ask the sexy understudy to take over!" winks at Starfire and puts his arm around her. "How you do?"
Starfire. "Yay!" Jumps into centre of the stage and starts singing. All the windows break. BB runs out of the bathroom.
BB. "Dude, someone made all the toilets exploded. AND I HAVE TO GO!"
Starfire. "Oh no. It is the evil Phantom of the Opera, of whom is my beloved teacher and is also crushing on me."
Phantom swings down to the stage, grabs his target then swings back to the ratters.
Cyborg. "Eh…Slade. Wrong Titan."
Robin over Slade shoulder. "Yeah, you're suppose to kidnap Starfire!"
Starfire. "We did not rescue from the dead so that you could make off with Robin again!"
Slade. "You know I prefer little boys."
BB. "Wasn't Terra your apprentice."
Slade. "You really didn't know Terra that well did you?"
Starfire. "Let Robin go or else!"
Slade. "Or else what?"
Slade. "Ah I'm deaf!"
Scene 2 take 2
Lights off. Lights On. Robin gone again.
Cyborg. "Cut. Wrong Titan again!"
Slade. "Sorry I have a one track mind."
260 takes later.
Raven. "I know how to solve this problem." Dress Robin in dress. "Now you're the girl!"
Robin. "Oh joy."
Cyborg. "Cheer up Rob! Dresses make me feel pretty." Twirls.
Slade and Robin in underground lair.
Slade. "And now that I finally have you, I can make you my apprentice!"
Other Titans appear.
Robin, "Hi guys."
Slade. "What the f! How did you find my lair so quickly?" Glares at Cyborg. "And why are you still wearing a dress?"
All turn to Cyborg.
Cyborg. "Dresses make me feel pretty." Spins.
Robin. "Okay…Anyway Slade there is nothing that you can say or do to make me join you!"
Slade. "Oh really?"
Cue Star Wars theme.
Slade. "Even if I told you I was your father!"
BB. "Hey that's not in the script!"
Raven. "You haven't read the latest type, have you?"
Slade. "Back to the point, if you please."
Robin. "Been done! Someone stop that music!"
Robin. "Thank you."
Slade. "Then there is nothing I can give you."
Robin. "Nope….well expect maybe a new play station."
Slade. Thinks. "What if I give you stuff then you will work for me."
Cyborg. "Yeah, we teenagers remember. We're shallow."
5 seconds later. Cyborg, BB, and Robin are all destroying the town.
Slade. "Well ladies what about you."
Raven. "There is nothing you can give us to make us work for you."
Slade. "Not even for a …." Holds up a bunny.
Another 5 seconds later, Starfire and 'Fluffy' are destroying the town as well.
Raven. "You guys are so easy!" Glares at Slade. "Nothing at all!"
Slade. "Well then I'll just have to let Beast Boy look at your diary!"
Raven. "NO! But then he'll learn that my favourite colour is pink and I secretly I fancy him!"
A further 5 seconds later and Raven is also destroying the town.
Slade. "I should have thought about this sooner!"
Cut back to ruin theatre.
Mad Mod. "Hello? Hello? Where has everyone gone? I haven't feed the duckies!"