Ta-da! My first one shot! I had it for a Saiyuki fic but I just couldn't wait to get this down on paper. Its just too much fun not to share with all of you.

InuYasha:Ahhh Chaos, I don't think one shot is gonna cut it. ;D

Me:Down boy! We'll just have to see.

Kagome:Really? Only one?

Me:Yes dear, only one. I don't wanna kill them, if you know what I mean.

Oh and I don't own anybody in this fic. curses long string of explitives

Don't stick your tongue out unless you know how to use it.

Sango and Miroku had been going at it for quite awhile. Even Shippo had given up on trying to stop the argument between the taijiya and the monk. It was amazing that Sango hadn't killed Miroku over a thousand times already. She was too busy verbally abusing him to think about her advantage over him. It had all started when Miroku groped Sango in the usual spot, and the typical argument had ensued. By now InuYasha, Kagome and Shippo had left them on their own to resolve their differences. Both were too busy verbally ripping each other apart to notice.

"You're always groping me! Dammit Miroku, what gives you any idea you can just touch me like that?" Sango glared at the lecherous monk, her already intense gaze drilling holes into him.

"It's the way you react that says it all," Miroku replied innocently. Sango just glared at the lecherous monk while trying to think of a comeback. She had used all her good ones in the previous dialog and she needed something to shut him up, for good. He always had something to say right back and she couldn't keep up. Maybe, if she didn't say anything, rather did something totally unexpected, that he would be caught off guard. So she stuck her tongue out at him. He blinked and said very nonchalantly, "You shouldn't stick your tongue out unless you know how to use it." Sango was taken aback by his quick wit, but decided to use it against him. She pulled out a small dagger from within her robes and walked over to Miroku. Placing a hand on his chest, she shoved him down on the ground and began to slowly rip his robes in a line down his chest. She straddled him as he lay on the ground, and began to trace that line all the way from his belly button to his collar bone. He moaned slightly in pleasure.

"Is that how you use your tongue, houshi-sama?" she whispered. Sango had secretly been wanting to do something like this for awhile now and she would enjoy every minute of it. All he could muster was a faint no as Sango continued her assault on his body with her tongue. She worked her way up to his watering mouth. She smirked at him as she leaned in for the kill, planting her rosy lips on his. She wiggled her tongue into his mouth and began to strike at his tongue like a snake strikes at its prey. He began to catch onto her game and started to fight back with his own tongue. She pulled away, much to Miroku's displeasure, and looked at him with a smug smile on her face.

"Is that how you use your tongue, Miroku?" Sango asked in a raspy voice, full of lust and desire. There would be no hiding it now, he she wanted him and that was just what she wanted. But the games weren't over yet, she still had a few more devious tricks up her sleeve that she had read about in one of Kagome's "mag-a-zine" thingys.

A raspy, "no" that was barely audible, was all Miroku could muster. Sango had him in such a haze, it was all he could to keep his wits about him. He knew that if he said yes that Sango would stop her little game and leave him on the edge of bliss. He was becoming wise to her games and was forming a game of his own to keep her there with him, where she belonged.

Sango could feel Miroku throbbing against her backside and that was exactly what she was looking for. She lifted herself off him momentarily to reposition her body so she could have better access to him. The large bulge in his robes showed just how happy he was with her. This time, instead of ripping his robes even more, she lifted them and pushed them backup onto his chest. The sudden exposer to the open air caused him to drop slightly, but as soon as Sango ran her tongue along the pulsing vein, he perked right back up. She tormented him with her tongue by drawing it up the side slowly a few times then quickening her pace only to slow back down again. She licked the tip and he quivered under her. His reaction was making the fire of lust pool in the pit of her stomach and she didn't know how much longer she could go on. He was so close to going over the edge she could see the precum beginning to dribble down. That was her queue.

"Is that how you use your tongue Miroku?" she sat up, leaving him hanging. All of his reason and cunning went out the window as Sango stopped her assault. He did not know how to respond, so he said the first thing that came to his mind, "Yes Sango. Yes yes yeess."

"Okay then, my lesson is over. Lets go," she said nonchalantly, rising from her oh-so dominating position over Miroku and started to walk away. His senses slowly returning, Miroku jumped up from the ground with renewed fervor. He was not going to let Sango get away without showing her the proper technique. He grabbed her arm and spun her around.

"Now who said anything about the lesson being over? You have good form but you need to learn the proper technique." He wrapped her in his arms and played with her mouth like she had played with his. He sucked on her bottom lip and did things with his tongue she never thought possible. With one hand he untied her kimono, leaving nothing in his way but her armor. His other hand trailed slowly down, untying everything and letting it fall to the ground. He trailed gentle kisses down her chest, snaking his tongue out to taste her. The moans she whispered in his ear made him go hard again, bringing back the hungry desire ten fold. He made his way down her stomach, enjoying the little giggles she made at his butterfly kisses tickling her with each one. He spiraled his tongue around her belly button and sucked on that as well, slipping his tongue into her innie. He laid her down gently for his next chapter in the lesson plan and brought her legs up on his shoulders. He licked her lips teasingly and she whimpered in protest. She was hot against his mouth as brought her core to his lips. He flicked it and her hips bucked in excitement. He liked having her in the palm of his hand, so he sucked on her core, flicking it more and more. He slid his tongue inside her and swirled it around loving the slickness and bittersweet taste of her. It was Sango's turn to be left on the edge of bliss as he sensed her closeness and he withdrew from her entirely. He was hard as a rock but he was going to have to wait just a little longer to get his release.

"And that my dear Sango.....is how you use your tongue." Miroku got up with a smug look on his face this time as she looked dazed, her eyes glossed over. She sat up in confusion as to why he stopped, then she saw him smirking at her. The lesson was over but she wasn't done. She wanted more, needed more and she was always good at getting what she wanted.

"Miroku," she gasped. "Don't you have two tongues?" Miroku caught on fairly quickly and dropped his robes in a hurry, hastily laying them out for the bedding.


"Do you tink it's safe to come back now, InuYasha?"

His ears perked up, scanning for any sign of the fight. It was silent as the grave, no screaming, no shouting no sign of life. He sniffed the air. Bad move. The smell of sweat, sex and musk pervaded the air. He nearly puked at the combination, then got a very naughty idea. He just needed to get rid of the furball.

"I think we should leave them alone for now. I have an idea where a jewel shard might be, but the runt's too small to bring along." he grinned lecherously. Kagome got the general gist and sent Shippo to see Kaede.

(A/N): mwhahahahahahaha! I am victorious! I am quite happy the way this turned out. Now I just need to know what you guys think!