Ok, this is my FIRST really dramatic/romantic story, and I am really pround of it. I don't care if you think it's total crap, maybe compared to other stuff it is, but that doesn't make me any less proud of it! :D But, anyway, this story is about a girl from Tatooine who thinks she's in love with Luke Skywalker. The idea came from the quote this story starts with, kind of a "what if it wasn't relaly that way" thing. It pretty much fits in with the movies and takes place just after ANH. This story mostly involves a few characters I made up. Luke, Leia and Han do appear in the last few chapters. Pining Heroine is not the official title, but I wanted to put this up, and I couldn't find anything that really felt right besides what I call it for reference. Title suggestions would be appreciated if you think you've og something I could use.
Man, I'm not good at summarizing! Oh well.
"I want to come with you to Alderaan. There is nothing here for me now." – Luke Skywalker
She thought about him all the time.
Several times an hour her thoughts would drift from their usual pattern and his face would fill her mind. She tried to stop it, tried to stop the pain the image of his soft blue eyes and light blonde hair would evoke. She tried to pretend nothing was wrong. But it was no use. The image would fill her mind, and his face was so clear it was like looking at a picture.
There was no way to escape the memories of him. He was gone, not a part of her life any more, and she wished she could just shed all thoughts of him from her mind. But no, she had to remember every single second she had spent with him, every single word he'd ever said to her, every single word she'd said back...
Saera sat on her soft, cushy bed. I t was a beautiful bed, an antique. The frame had been her grandmother's and the quilt her mother's. Saera had loved this bed when she was a child. She had always felt safe in this bed. But it could not comfort her now.
He was dead. The scouts had said everyone was dead. Killed by Sand people.
"Why?" Saera cried into her pillow. How could he be dead? She had known him all her like, and no he had been wrenched away from her so suddenly, so violently. He had always been there in the past; he'd always been a part of her life. He was only a year older than her, but they were in the same year at the local school. Well, they had been, when they'd still gone. She and Luke had had their first day of school together. He had helped her whenever she was didn't understand the schoolwork, even if he was equally miffed.
Luke had always protected her from the bullies at the school like she was his little sister. Little sister, she thought bitterly. Like a little sister.
Why was she remembering this about him? She should be remembering more important things. The things that had made her love him...
Luke had never known how she'd felt about him. How she loved him, all of him. For as long as she could remember she had loved him. And she had never told him. She had been too afraid of what he might think of her. She knew he would never, ever laugh at her face, but what if that was what he felt like inside? She could never have lived with that.
So she just never told him. And now she never would.
Saera sobbed harder into her pillow. She felt so empty inside, like there was a big hole in her soul. Then she heard a knock at her door.
"Go away!" she yelled. But with the pillow muffling her, he knew she'd never be heard. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore.
"Sweetheart, Saera, darling, can I talk to you?" a deep voice called from the other side of the door. She couldn't be bothered replying; her father would barge in no matter what she said, and she was too exhausted from grief to deal with him. Saera heard, as she had predicted, the sound of a door opening and someone walking into the room. Then the door closed and her father walked over to a chair near the bed and sat.
"Saera, what's wrong?"
Saera lifted her head from the pillow and sat up. "What do you mean, 'what's wrong?' Three people I knew my entire life just got murdered brutally by a bunch of sand pigs and you ask me 'what's wrong?'" She yelled the last part. She knew her father would get all uppity about it, but she didn't care. He was the only one that cared. Who was going to hear her, his stupid rock gardeners? They didn't care. Who even needed rock gardeners, especially on a sand pit like Tatooine?
"Well, yes, it's sad about Beru and Owen and Luke. Tragic really, but you don't need to get yourself so worked up about it. I don't know why you're acting like this, it's not like you at all."
"No, Dad, it's not like you. This is exactly like me. I wear my emotions on my sleeve all the time, and I act like an idiot sometimes, but that's me. Of course, that doesn't matter to you, does it? Because you're so wonderful and perfect and I'm supposed to be like you in every way and grow up a perfect lady and move to some weird culturally rich place like Alderaan or something. I always have to be exactly like you or it's completely unacceptable. Why is that, Dad? Why is it that you're so horrible and demanding?"
"Watch your mouth, young lady! You are not to speak to your elders like that!"
"There it is again." Saera flopped down on her bed so she was lying on her side facing her father.
"You just don't understand, do you?" she said tiredly. "They mattered to me, and I'm going to show that. Can't you get that?"
"Well, yes, I suppose, but I just don't see why. They were just low-key moisture farmers."
Saera sat up. "Oh, I see. That's it. You're annoyed because I don't want the whole "high society" thing you've got planned for me. You're annoyed because I care about them and they weren't as well off as us." She spat it out.
"No, that's not—"
"Yes, it is true! I should have never bothered trying to talk to you. You don't understand. You've never understood! My mother would have understood!"
"Don't you speak to me like that! I've had enough of you disrespect!" Now her father raised his voice. He was always upset when her mother was mentioned. She knew he was going to blow completely soon if she kept going on like this, but she couldn't help it. She was so angry she wanted to scratch his eyes out,
My own father...
"Dad, why do you have to be so...so..." Finding herself not able to select the exact right word, she turned and screamed into the pillow instead.
"Well, really, they were just poor farmers. Owen was a bad gambler who couldn't hold his liquor, Beru was never anything special even in her youth, and Luke was a silly deluded boy!"
"How dare you say those things!" Saera screamed so loud she made her own ears ring. "Are you really so shallow that all you see is outside appearances? Owen was loyal and hardworking and kept up with his farming, even when times were rough. Beru was kind, gentle, sweet, and always willing to help. And Luke was smart, and strong, and caring, and handsome, and...Saera drifted into a misty gaze. Suddenly aware of her father's eyes she looked down and picked slightly at the quilt.
"I see where this is going, Saera. I don't like it. Why?"
"Jeez, Dad, why are you so horrible? Just because I loved someone who was not a kajillionaire or whatever doesn't mean anything." She jumped up, then gasped. It was the first time she'd confessed her love for Luke to anyone. But she couldn't stop to think about that now. Not when she was on a roll. "It doesn't mean anything, except that I'm not a prejudiced pig like you!"
"Sit down right now." He stood up, speaking through clenched teeth with such anger that she was scared for a couple seconds but mustered her resolve. She had to take a stand and start to make her own decisions.
"NO! I'll sit down hen I want, I'll yell when I want, I'll stand up for what's right when I want. Can't you see, I'm not a child anymore! I can make my own decisions, and I'll do whatever I want!
Her father seemed somewhat surprised at this statement, an emotion she didn't often see him wear. Then all of a sudden his expression changed back to one of pure rage.
"You'll regret you ever said that," he barely uttered, a sure sign of his mounting anger.
He stormed out of the room before she could come back at him, slamming the door on his way out.
She knew what was coming next. He was going to come back at her full force, make her life a misery for months to come. He'd ban her from going anywhere, doing anything. She knew because she'd done things like this before, though not quite of this magnitude.
Yes, she knew all about the routine. But she was so sick of it.
Please review! :)