Parenting Class finished on: July 7, 2005

Sequel can be found as One Step at a Time on my profile or in the link below:

Completed Spanish Version:

Completed German Version:

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Disclaimer: I claim no ownership to Harry Potter characters, classes, or anything else related to Rowling's works of wonder.

Parenting Class

No Way!

"So what do you think this new class is going to be about?" asked Ronald Weasley, his freckled nose crinkled as he reread the notice each sixth year student had gotten that morning at breakfast.

"It's a parenting class," said Hermione Granger, honey eyes shimmering with excitement. "Dumbledore wants us to all experience being part of a family and gain practice in caring for those younger then us."

"But why?" the redhead protested, stuffing the paper into his back pocket. "I've already had plenty of practice at my house. I have five older brothers and a younger sister for Merlin's sake! What do I need more practice for?"

"Well Ron," said Harry, "not everyone has a big family like you do. I mean, I have Dudley who could be classified as a brother but Hermione doesn't have any siblings. Neither do Dean or Lavender."

"Besides Ron," laughed the girl, "if you're as good as you say you'll get top grades! Think of it as an easy class for you to pass." Ron brightened considerably and the three continued up to the East Tower in silence, all of their energy going to the steep climb.

"Who in their right mind puts a class all the way up here?" panted Ron. "Sure, Trelawny's got her North Tower spot but at least it's by a major staircase and we know a secret passage! Say, Harry? Does the map show any shortcuts around here?"

"Nope, sorry mate," Harry said with a grin. "Do you think we might be able to create a passage Mione?"

"We can't do that!" Hermione exclaimed, pausing her climb to turn around and look at her friends. "The castle was built to be as it is...we aren't supposed to change anything!"

"Not even a little, tiny, mini passage?" Ron pleaded.

"No," she said firmly, voice holding a closing note. "Now hurry up or we'll be late." Increasing their pace, the three best friends reached the top of the winding passage exactly eleven minutes and thirty-six seconds later.

"Well, here we are," said Harry looking at the door in front of them. "Should we go in?"

Hermione rolled her eyes and pushed the door open, a gasp expelling from her throat at the classroom in front of them. It was about half the size of the Great Hall with desk lined up in neat rows. Students from each of the four houses were sitting down with their friends, glancing nervously at a closed door in the back of the room where the teacher currently was.

A large, crystal chandelier hung from the center of the room, candles sparkling amongst the gems. An ornate red and silver rug was beneath their feet, the only classroom they knew of to have carpeting. Golden picture frames adorned the walls, all of them holding a scroll of some sort.

"This isn't actually a classroom," said Hermione, sliding into one of the empty desks. "Hogwarts a History says that this is actually a conference room for the teachers that they use to plan out events and course schedules. Back in 1944 the Prefects actually got to use this room as a meeting place for themselves."

"Is everyone from sixth year here?" asked Harry in wonderment, glancing around the gigantic room. In a far corner sat Draco Malfoy, legs propped up on the desk with Crabbe and Goyle sitting on either side of him.

A cluster of Hufflepuffs were towards the center of the room and Ravenclaws dominated the front rows of the desks. Other students were dotted around the class, talking in small groups or remaining strangely silent.

"Looks like a full house," remarked Dean Thomas, dropping into a chair next to Ron. "Why do you think all of us are here at one time? Can one teacher really handle us all?"

"I would think they could if we didn't a few certain people in our class," said Ron, giving a dark look over to the Slytherin corner. "But it is weird."

Two sharp handclaps caught the group's attention and everyone at once quieted down and turned to look at the front of the room. A rather petite woman was standing there, her black hair cut to chin length with clips holding back some of the shorter strands. She wore a set of light purple robes, a wand in her left hand.

"Welcome to Parenting Class," she said with a bright smile. "I'm Professor Tobin and will have all of you for the first few weeks of the school year. If you are not a sixth year student and somehow accidentally wound up here please show yourself out." No one moved.

"Very well then. First off, I'd like to announce the schedule for this year. Quidditch will be canceled for now and restarted in February," she began, ignoring the gasps from the Quidditch players. "This class will only go on from now until the end of October. During that time, some of your classes you normally take may have to be changed to incorporate your charge's needs." Here several glances were exchanged warily amongst the students.

"Professor?" asked Hermione raising her hand. "I understand that this is a parenting class but would you please tell us what it is?"

"I'm getting to that Miss Granger," the professor said with a chuckle. "I'm sure that many of you will be happy to hear this next part," she said, turning to face the class. "This is the only time we will ever meet here. In fact, this is the last time you will have Parenting Class." Eyebrows were raised in confusion but Tobin continued.

"Today you will all be randomly split into groups of three depending on the closeness of your schedules. And yes, you may be paired with other houses," she said in answer to the unasked question.

"From now on, skip over this period and use it as a free class until Parenting Class ends. You will then go back to your normal schedules. In your group of three one of you will be turned into a five year old child."

"What the-"

"She can't be serious!"

"No way!"

Exclamations of protest rose among the students until Tobin raised a slim hand for silence. "There is no use making a big deal out of it," she answered calmly. "In turn, every two weeks someone else in the group will turn into the child and the previous child back to their original age. Each 'family' so to speak will be given a small house of their own inside of the castle. It is there you will live for the two months with your group."

"What exactly are we learning from this, Professor?" queried Hermione.

"To be a responsible, mature adult," the teacher responded promptly. "As a parent you must never let the child out of your sight unless you have worked out arrangements with your partner or a friend to watch him or her for you. You may not however have a younger student sit for you. Are there any more questions?"

"How are we being graded on this?" asked Parvarti, her brown eyes sparkling with enthusiasm for the project.

"Your grade will be based on how content the child is and how well you are managing. Your charge will come with you to classes that both you and your partner share where professors will observe your interaction with the child."

"When you're the child will you have any memories after the five year old age?" asked Hermione.

"The potion we're using is very complicated. The child will remember events from their past but his or her current 'guardians' will be in place of his or her mother and father. You will of course look different but to the child you will be that parent. Another handy little spell is all of the child's clothing will shrink to fit as soon as the potion had been drunk. If no one has any further questions I'll call out the groups."

Hermione tightly gripped her friends' hands, wanting to be with them. "First group is Padama Patil, Seamus Finnagin, and Hannah Abbot. If you could please come here..."

The three said students nervously rose to their feet and made their way up to the teacher. "So I only have to say this once listen up," ordered Tobin. "I'm giving each group a map to bring them to their temporary rooms where their trunks already are. In the top corner of the paper is the password to your room. Inside you will find three glasses. Please have everyone take one and drink it. One of them has the potion and as soon as the glasses have been emptied your assignment has started."

Hannah took the rolled up parchment and her small group left the room, a relieved smile on all of their faces. "Group two is Ronald Weasley, Lavender Brown, and Terry Boot. "

"Have fun," whispered Hermione to Ron as he got up and left the classroom a moment later, his face a slight shade of green.

"Group three is Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, and Harry Potter."

"This can't be happening," murmured Hermione, rising to her feet and going to the front of the room, Harry walking protectively next to her.

"If the ferret tries anything I'll make sure he'll regret it," Harry comforted, a grim smile on his face. Draco joined the two Gryffindors a moment later, a scowl on his pale face. Whispers ran around the class as the Gryffindor pair stared at the Slytherin.

"Thank you," said Hermione stiffly, taking the handed map from Tobin, her brown eyes never leaving Draco's silver. Silently she turned and exited the room, the map clutched tightly in her hand.

"Listen here Malfoy," growled Harry, pausing once they were out of the class. "If you try to do anything to Hermione you will pay."

"Let's all just try to get through this," Hermione pleaded. "No fighting, insulting or teasing, okay? It's only for two months...can we try to get along for that time?" She held out her hand expectantly to Draco.

He hesitated before quickly shaking her hand before wiping his on his robes as though he'd just caught a germ. "I'm doing this so I don't fail the class," he hissed, glaring daggers at Hermione.

"Where are we supposed to go?" butted in Harry, trying to avoid arguments at all costs. He too wanted to pass the class and prove that he could survive life with the Slytherin for two whole months.

"We're down by the charms corridor," Hermione said, peering intently at the map. "Our portrait should have a jester on it. The password for the two months is 'Parvulus'." In a tense silence the trio made their way to their temporary home, each thinking their own thoughts.

'I can't believe it! Two Gryffindors! And they just happened to be the Mudblood and Potter. Can life get any worse?' grumbled the Slytherin to himself, gray eyes stormy. 'Father will be furious with the arrangement...I should talk to Tobin and see if I can get a new group, but for some reason I don't think she'll change us.'

'I guess I should be lucky it's only Malfoy,' thought Harry. 'What if I'd gotten stuck with him and Zabani or Parkinson or some other Slytherin instead of Hermione? I think they would have either brought me to Voldemort as a sacrifice or I'd have much bodily harm done to me. Yep, guess I'm very luck to have Hermione.'

'Maybe this won't be so bad,' mused Hermione, her expression thoughtful. 'If Ron were here instead of Harry I can see some problems...with his temper and Malfoy's mouth we'd be digging ourselves into a pretty deep hole. But if we can all work on our truce we should be okay, right?'

"We're here," said Hermione, pausing a few moments later. The trio stood in front of a portrait of a man wearing a red and black jester's outfit, his face painted white with a large grin.

"Ah ha!" he exclaimed, juggling several bright green balls. "You must be the group I'm taking in. I'm Leviculus and at your service. Do you have the password?"

"Parvulus," said Hermione clearly.

"Jolly well done," Leviculus chuckled. "I'll open up after I lay down some basic information that Professor Tobin gave to me. Righty, first off is each of you has your own bedroom so no sharing unless you happen to be the child. That is allowed if the child would like to stay with someone. Second, the portrait is child locked from the inside meaning whichever of you is the little tyke you can't exit unless you have a guardian with you. And that's it. Go on in."

Leviculus swung open and the three entered, eyes taking in their living conditions.

"Who decorated?" exclaimed Draco, eyes widening in horror. Bright orange couches sat in the front room with yellow fringe on the pillows. The walls were a sky blue with green polka dots and the carpeting was a dazzling shade of red.

Hermione giggled. "We do have a jester as our portrait...he probably gave his input on the room. It's quite different, don't you think so Harry?"

But the boy-who-lived wasn't listening, his eyes focused on three glasses sitting on a pink table. Each glass was half full of a deep purple liquid. Hesitantly he picked one up and sniffed it. "It smells like grape juice," Harry said with a smile.

Draco picked up a glass and Hermione took the last one. "Cheers," she said, the three of them clinking glasses before downing the liquid.

Draco set his glass back down on the table. "None of us changed," he remarked, staring at his reflection in the mirror that hung on the wall. He was still almost six feet with his silvery blond hair where as Harry was slightly taller then him and Hermione came up a little past his chin.

"It does take a while," yelled Leviculus from outside. "Just you wait."

Seconds later one of the images in the mirror wavered and began to shrink until a small child was standing on the floor and peering up at the two teenagers.

"Oh my God..."

Author's Notes:

Well, this fic is going to be my attempt at humor and away from some of the darker themes I normally write. If you are a reader of some of my other fics, gomen for writing this but I have all of these ideas popping up and I had to get at least one down on paper!

Does anyone have any clue of which character I made into a child first?

Updates may take a while cuz of school and all but I will update as soon as I can. A quick tip I learned...more reviewsfaster updates. n.n

Please do leave a review so I can see what you all think of this. Arigatou! (That means Thank You in Japanese. I'm a big fan of their language, culture, and most importantly their anime!)