Disclaimer:I do not own ReBoot, any of its characters, or Mainframe Entertainment. I also do not own any of the movies or songs spoofed in this. I do not own M&M/Mars Inc. I am making no money off of this work.
Notes:Thank you to Charisma, Norcumi, and Morning Cereal for their help with this fic. Thanks also to Meghan, to whom this fic is dedicated, for inspiring this. Yes, it's all her fault. Happy Birthday, Meghan!
Bob handed Dot her popcorn and made a disgusted face.
"How can you eat this stuff without any butter? Dry popcorn always sticks in my throat."
Dot grinned and popped a piece into her mouth. "I'd rather not have a heart attack delete me. That butter is loaded with cholesterol."
Bob shook his head. "Women…" He ducked as Dot swung an imaginary punch at him.
Dot looked up as Enzo's voice called from across the lobby. "Yeah, Enzo?"
"Can I borrow a few units? I want to get some M&M's"
Bob leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Does he really need sugar?"
Dot chuckled and walked over to where her little brother stood at the concessions stand. She goggled a bit at the huge bucket of popcorn and large soda he had gotten for himself. "Enzo, do you really need any more junk food?"
"I just don't think it's good for you to eat all that."
"Oh, hey! The movie's starting!" Bob said, quickly, stopping the argument before it began.
Dot flashed Bob a quick smile. "Enzo, you and Bob go find us some seats. I'm going to get some butter on my popcorn."
Bob stared at her in disbelief, opened his mouth to reply, and then thought better of it. "C'mon, Enzo. Let's get our seats."
Enzo groaned as he looked up at the screen. "Why do they show all these previews at the beginning of every movie? They're boring."
Bob shrugged. "Some of them are kind of funny." He tossed a piece of popcorn into the air and tried to catch it in his mouth, missing it completely. A binome in the row of seats in front of them was hit and turned around to glare at the Guardian. Bob gave a sheepish smile. "Heh heh…sorry!"
The binome grumbled something unflattering and turned back to the screen. Dot plopped down in the seat next to Bob with a grin on her face.
Bob rolled his eyes. "Just watch the previews."
Dot put her hand over his. "This does look interesting," she agreed, looking the screen.
(Angsty music plays in the background as Matrix walks down a dimly lit street. A voice begins speaking over the soundtrack) Matrix...by day, he's an angst-filled renegade Guardian. Misunderstood by his friends and family...seeking understanding and inner peace.
(Matrix walks along the street, stopping under the dimly lit sign of a nightclub. The music starts to swell) There's only one place he can go.... Only one place he can express the passions that drive him...
(Matrix walks into the club. The camera cuts away from him to slow pan throughout the club and show the various patrons. The soundtrack becomes increasingly dramatic.)
(Suddenly, a single spotlight hits the stage, illuminating a figure with their back turned to us. Everything stops for a single, dramatic moment)
(A voice begins to sing over the soundtrack) Ask when there's nothing but a slow-flowing dream...and your fear seems to hide deep inside your mind. (The figure turns to reveal Matrix dressed in a leotard, dance shoes, and legwarmers) All alone, I have cried silent tears full of pride...in a world made of steel...made of stone...(close up of a single tear running down Matrix's cheek)
(Matrix suddenly breaks out of his paralysis, as the music picks up, and begins to dance) Now I hear the music...close my eyes...feel the rhythm...wrap around, taking hold of my heart!
(Matrix gives a sudden, spectacular leap to the front of the stage) WHAT A FEELING! Keep believing I can have it all...now I'm dancing for my life!
(Close up of AndrAIa hidden in the shadows, watching Matrix, with tears running down her face. She turns away, leaving the club)
(Cut to a shot of Matrix sneaking away from the club later that evening) He can't tell them. They couldn't understand...but Matrix someday must give into the fires that burn within him...(pause) coming soon from Ryuu-sama productions...FLASHBOOT!
Enzo snickered. "Oh sure…I wanna see some movie about a ballet dancer."
Bob laughed with him. "Oh yeah. Who watches stuff like that?"
Dot shrugged. "I don't know. It looks like it might be good."
The binome that Bob had hit with the popcorn turned around to glare at them. "Do you mind? Some of us are trying to watch this!"
"Sorry!" Dot called.
The binome grumbled something and turned back around. Enzo stuck his tongue out. Dot glared at her brother. Bob nudged her.
"Look, a chick flick."
(The scene starts with a wide-angle shot of Mainframe. It moves around and in the city, finally closing in on Dot's Diner. The camera moves into the diner, and stops across the room from Dot who is sitting at the counter, absorbed in something on her organizer screen. Bob walks in and sits at a booth, watching Dot out of the corner of his eye. Light, romantic music plays.) Once upon a time, a Guardian fell in love with the most beautiful sprite in the Net. (Bob ducks his head as Dot looks up. She sees him and smiles. The scene cuts to the two of them standing in front of a ship at Mainframe's docks.)
Dot: (teary-eyed) I'm afraid I'll never see you again.
Bob: (puts his hands on her shoulders and smiles) This is true love. Nothing can stop it. I promise, Dot. I will return for you.
(The music swells as they hug and Bob walks aboard the ship.) With a final kiss goodbye, and promise to return, Bob leaves to seek his fortune. But soon, Dot gets some bad news…
(Sad music on the soundtrack. Cut to a scene of Dot holding a letter and looking grief-stricken. A concerned-looking Cesil hovers in the background.)
Dot: (choked voice) T-they say the Dread Pirate Capacitor attacked the ship at dawn…
(Close up of Megabyte. Ominous music plays. The shot moves back to show Dot standing beside him. He takes her hand and smiles.) Soon, an evil virus makes his own plans for the lovely sprite. All seems lost for our heroine with her beloved Bob gone forever. Or, is he?
(Cut to a shot of the Sprite in Black fencing with Mouse. Swash-buckling music plays. Dissolve to a scene of Dot looking at the Sprite in Black.) Find out just how far true love will go in this exciting new film from Dragonlady Pictures!
(The music stops. The screen goes black. The title appears in green calligraphic lettering) The Princess Sprite…because true love is always worth waiting for.
Dot had tears in her eyes as she watched the trailer. "That is so sweet! Do you want to go see that when it comes out, Bob?"
Bob had a slightly glazed look on his face. "Uh…sure, Dot. It looks great."
Enzo shook his head and pretended to retch. "Ugh…kissing movie."
Dot looked over at him and laughed softly. "Well, someday you won't mind so much, Enzo."
The boy snorted. "Not likely!"
Dot smiled tolerantly, shrugged, and returned to watching the previews.
(The scene is a perfect spring day in the Supercomputer. The shot moves to show the outside of the Guardian Academy and focuses on a lone figure that walks out and moves behind a nearby tree, watching another figure, this one obviously female, move past. The shot moves in closer to reveal the first person to be a young Bob who wears a goofy grin. The song "Close to You" begins playing.) Do you remember your first crush? That one person you'd give anything to get to notice you?
(Cut to a scene of a nervous Bob talking to the same girl who he was watching earlier. She is exceptionally lovely, with long, flowing, golden hair, wide blue eyes, and pale, perfect skin.)
Bob: Uh…I was wondering…er…do you want to go to the prom with me, Mary Sue?
Mary Sue: (blushing faintly) That would be wonderful, Bob!
Bob: Oh, great! I'll, uh, pick you up at eight, then.
Mary Sue: I'll see you, Bob. (walks away).
Bob: (watches her go before punching his fist in the air) Yippee!
(Cut to a shot of Bob getting dressed for the prom in his dorm room. A picture of Mary Sue catches his attention and he smiles mistily, distracted for a crucial second. Cut to a shot of the exterior of the Guardian Academy.)
Bob: (voiceover) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(High-angle shot of Mainframe. The camera moves over the city in one of those vertigo-inducing shots.) For those of you who always hoped that fate would give you a second chance at that first love…
(Cut to a shot of a bored-looking adult Bob seated in a booth at the Diner. The door opens and his jaw drops as a still-stunning Mary Sue walks in. She stares at him in shock as Dot fumes quietly in the background.)
Bob: Mary Sue!
Mary Sue: Bob!
("Build Me Up, Buttercup" begins to play. Cut to a shot of Bob walking down the street with Ray Tracer talking earnestly to him.)
Ray: I don't understand, mate. You dumped Dot just so you could try and hook up with this Sheila? What is it about her?
Bob: Ray, she's perfect. Beautiful, brilliant, funny, the greatest Guardian ever initialized…I have to have her. Whatever it takes, I've got to get her back.
(Mary Sue walks past and smiles at the two of them, causing both men's jaws to drop. She passes by. Ray and Bob look at each other and promptly begin to exchange blows.)
Bob: She's mine! I saw her first!
Ray: No way, mate! You've got Dot!
(Cut to a shot of Dot, Mouse, and AndrAIa watching the fight in disgust. The shot pans over to Mary Sue who smiles dazzlingly at the audience. The title "There's Something About Mary Sue" is superimposed over her image.) No one ever forgets their first crush.
Bob, Dot, and Enzo stared at the screen along with everyone else in the theatre. They all wore identical expressions of disgust, shock, and horror.
"User!" Bob exclaimed. "Why would anyone want to see a movie like that?"
Dot shook her head. "That's crazy. No one's that perfect. Wouldn't it be annoying if they were?"
"Man…I'm going to have nightmares after seeing that," said Enzo.
Bob patted his shoulder. "We all are, Enzo."
Dot sighed in relief. "At least it's over now. See? The movie's starting."
The three sprites settled down to watch the opening credits.
Enzo thought again of the last trailer, shuddered, and whispered to Bob, "So, do you think it'd be possible for anyone like that to come to Mainframe?"
Bob shook his head. "No way, Enzo. No one like that really exists. Just watch the movie."
Enzo nodded. "Okay, Bob."
Bob smiled and put his arm around Dot. She leaned against his shoulder and became absorbed in the action on the screen. Enzo quickly scanned the theatre and relaxed, seeing no one with blonde hair in the seats near him. Good. At least none of those creepy Mary Sues really existed. A tiny smile quirked at his mouth and he laughed silently.
Mary Sue…what a crazy idea. No one's basic enough to create one of those!