This was more or less written at 11 p.m. the night before a chemistry test I hadn't studied for while I was on PMS and doped up on Tootsie Rolls. And I'd just finished rereading the first six chapters of Borath's Experiment (THE best Darkshipping fic out there). So that accounts for the weirdness. Yami Bakura POV, but you'd think that was obvious.

You think I own them? pfft, think again, buddy.

Warnings: Darkshipping, Heartshipping, Yami Bakura rambling in his head, cussing, and thoughts of sex. I think that's about it.


It was a Saturday morning. No school for the hikaris, but most normal teenage boys would be quite content to lay around in bed until noon or later, especially with no parents around to make them get up. Not Ryou. He'd been meaning to talk to Yugi about something for awhile, and today the little anklebiter was minding the Game Shop while the old geezer was at some gaming conference.

So up Ryou gets at the crack of dawn (a.k.a. 8 a.m.) and drags me up with him. After a token fight I allowed myself to be dragged, since going to annoy the pharaoh was better than sitting around staring at my soulroom wall all day. And hey, I might be able to take a pot shot at the Puzzle while I was there. Not bad for a weekend's "work".

"Now yami," Ryou cautioned me as we walked toward the Moto's. "Please, please be nice to Yami Yugi." Psssht, when have I ever been 'nice' to the pharaoh? Oh, is Ryou still talking? My bad... "I have something very important to tell Yugi, and I'm bloody well going to be annoyed if you interrupt."

Woah, did Ryou just cuss at me? It was a sissy British cuss (he's been watching way too many of those American sitcoms lately. What was that one... The Nanny? Like I care.) but still a cuss. Maybe the little cur is growing a backbone after all. Finally!

...Hold on. I raised an eyebrow, glancing at Ryou out of the corner of my eye. Was he blushing, or was it just my imagination? I snickered quietly. "Awww, does hikari have a crush?" Yup, definitely blushing. Oh boy, my light has a crush on the pharaoh's brat. I'll have to remember to taunt the pharaoh about that. Heh. Can you imagine them in bed together? They'd spend all night trying to decide who would be seme. Ryou and Yugi, I mean. Not Yami and anyone. Whooo... Evil thoughts, there. I don't want to imagine Yami in bed with anyone. Scary thoughts, there.

Must get away from that train of thought. Ack, no, I do not want to imagine Yami naked, thanks. That's just.... ewwww...

I shook my head sharply, becoming aware of the fact that Ryou was talking again, at a rather fast pace now that we were nearing the Game Shop. "Please yami, don't ruin this for me!"

"We'll see," is my comment. I continued to smirk, just to keep him nervous, but honestly I had no plans to mess up his supposed love confession. Everyone deserves a chance to be happy, even if it is with a runt like Yugi Moto.

...And if that sounds un-Yami Bakura-like, deal with it. Eight years of living with a creame puff like Ryou can change even the evilest of evil spirits. Not that I'm a good guy now, or anything dumb like that.

We spent the rest of the walk in silence, Ryou blushing and me brooding. Was I acting un-tomb robberly? Yeah, I'll admit it, I was depressed. Hell, why wouldn't I be? I hadn't had sex in thousands of years, and anyone who was worth having sex with wouldn't even call me by name, let alone let me seduce him.

Woah. Hold on. I did not just say 'him'. Last time I checked I was straight. Damnit! Why does my mind keep jumping back to the damn pharaoh?! No, I do not want to see him naked, thank you very little to the voice in my head.

By the time we reached the Game Shop, I was so far in gloom that I nearly missed the way Yugi's face lit up when Ryou walked in. Seemed the runt returned my light's sentimental feelings. Peachy.

"Ryou!" Yugi cried, the happiness obvious in his voice. Then his eyes drifted to me, and his face fell a bit. "Oh, and Bakura-san..."

I grinned. "Hello munchkin."

Yugi wrinkled his nose a little, then tapped his knuckles against the side of the Puzzle. "Come out, Yami-kun," he said, speaking aloud for mine and Ryou's benefit.

A moment later the pharaoh appeared next to his hikari, and as soon as he saw me he scowled and crossed his arms. I scowled right back, trying to fight off the sudden primal urge to mentally undress him. Ra, what was with me today?! Hadn't I sworn I would never be desperate enough to screw the pharaoh? As usual, the hikaris ignored the animosity between the pharaoh and I.

"Ryou and I are going up to my bedroom," Yugi chirped, although he and Ryou both blushed when I snickered loudly. "Can you mind the store and try not to tear anything up, Yami-kun?"

"Of course." Yami smiled at his light. "You two play nice."

Ryou and Yugi both blushed bright red again, but I was too surprised to snicker. By Ra, the pharaoh had just made a joke! I didn't know he even knew what sexual innuendo was! Yami must have seen my started expression, because he gave me a funny look as Ryou and Yugi left the shop to go upstairs. Quickly I turned away, making a pretense of studying a new Duel Monsters display to avoid the pharaoh's eyes. I heard him moving, and glanced over my shoulder to find him sitting on the stool behind the counter, drumming his fingers idly on the glass top. He stopped when he noticed me looking at him, and gave me another funny look that I couldn't interpret.

"This is beyond disturbing," he said after a moment, gesturing in the general direction our lights had gone. "Them being our reincarnations, and together, and all..."

"Oh, you noticed?" I asked sarcastically.

Yami rolled his eyes. "Thief, their hormone levels are so high that if I'd been mortal I'd have drowned in my soulroom."

I snickered, turning fully to face him and swaggering over to lean against the counter. Yes, I can swagger. I didn't spend a year with Malik and learn nothing, after all. "And that would be a bad thing because...?"

He shot me a dirty look, going back to drumming his fingers against the counter. "Thief..."

We were interrupted as the bell over the shop door chimed. Both of us looked up to see one of Ryou and Yugi's teachers coming in, looking around as if he was uncertain he was in the right place. Then he saw us by the counter and smiled, looking more sure of himself. "Ah, hello Ryou, Yugi. I'm looking for a gift for my niece and someone told me you sell games here."

I did a quick mental dig through Ryou's memories. This was his algebra teacher, a subject that Ryou detested. Seemed he didn't like the teacher much, either. I could see why, the guy was so damn nice. Payback time, then.

Yami sneered. "Obviously." he said dryly, rolling his eyes and gesturing at the racks of games. Ahhh... looks like the pharaoh and I think alike at times. The teacher looked startled, and I smirked at him.

"What, has all the math rotted your brain down so far you can't tell a game shop from a book store?" Okay, it was a lame insult, but Yami snickered. Yay me! ...No. I did not just cheer for making Yami smirk. Cheering for anything about Yami is just wrong. Anzu is living proof of that. Shudder, shudder, smack. Okay, I'm better now.

Now the guy was beginning to look mad. "Look boys-"

I snickered. If he knew just who he was talking to... "At what, your potbelly or non-existent hair?"

Yami snickered again from behind me as the teacher's face turned purple in rage. Turning on one heel, he stalked out of the shop. As he left, Yami and I could just barely hear him mutter, "Strange, Ryou and Yugi are usually so nice..."

As soon as he was gone, Yami and I collapsed against the counter in helpless laughter. Oh Ra, that had been fun! And I hadn't laughed like that in a long, long time. Too long, probably. It felt... good to laugh again.

"If only he knew..." Yami snickered, propping his chin up on his arms, which were leaning against the glass counter. He smirked at me, a real, honest-to-goodness smirk. Not a 'I'm going to send you to the Shadow Realm' smirk. Not a 'I'm holding all the winning cards as usual' smirk, but a 'this is amusing and fun but I'm not actually going to let myself smile' smirk. Idly I wished I could see it more often.

Ryou's hormones must have been rubbing off on me, because before sanity managed to kick me in the head I leaned over the counter, grabbed Yami's chin in my hand, and kissed him.

There was a moment were he went absolutely still, and I was just waiting for him to pull away. But then to my surprise one of his hands entangled itself in my hair, pulling me closer. I grabbed him by the front of the shirt with my other hand, making a damn good effort to bruise his lips.

After a few intense moments in which sanity ceased to exist we broke apart, both of us panting and wide-eyed. He managed to catch his breath first, and asked "Where did that come from?"

I shrugged blandly, averting my eyes. Yeah, go ahead, send me to the Shadow Realm until I find another foxhole out... "Do you know why I tease you, pharaoh?" Ra, where did that come from?

Yami blinked, as surprised by my change of topic as I was. "...No, why?"

I scowled slightly. "Because I damn well can't remember why I hate you."

There was a moment of silence, and then Yami chuckled. Chuckled, I tell you! "Bakura,"

I turned to face him, amazed that he'd actually called me by name. The look on his face amazed me even more. "...What?"

He came around the counter, backing me up against it with just his very presence. He stared up at me with half-lidded eyes as I started mentally stripping him again. I didn't mind so much this time, as he had his hands in my hair again and it felt rather good. Pulling me down close to him, he stood on tip toes to whisper in my ear.

"I don't remember either."

I smiled and twined my arms around his waist, wondering if losing control in the front room would hurt the shop's business any, or if it would attract it. My mind flitted to the hikaris for a moment, then dismissed them. They'd understand, or at least they'd better if they knew what was good for them. Yami's hands in my hair brought me back to reality, and I smiled, leaning down to capture him as my own again.

"Good."

When you've lived for a few thousand years things start to get redundant. The past fades until it's only a faint light glimmering somewhere far behind you. The future stretches out ahead, bleak in its promise of immortal monotony. And when you can't remember the past and you can't stand to look at the future, your only choice is to live in the moment.


So how was it? I kinda like it, but then again, I'm still high off Tootsie Rolls. (What are they made of, anyway? Chocolate plastic? They're good, though.) Reviews!