FINAL GOODBYES
Written by Star
Chapter One - Not a Night to Die

In the West the sun shall set
While in the East the sun shall rise
While in the west the moon shall rise
And in the East the moon shall set
What will rise is that which will set
And so too does life rise and set...

(Pixie Wings)

It seems a life time ago I last slept in my own bed, but there I was, back under my green blankets. Nothing in this house changed, structurally, it was the house we left before the Argos mission. If only we'd never left...if, I hate that word. Our world is full of ifs', we spend too much time pondering if'. The word if' only means we won't move on, we'll be stuck in the past forever, wondering forever...if'. If you'd never taught me that, Star, I'd never know how futile a word it is...

A million Stars light
This beautiful night
This is not a night to die
Let me sing and dance
Beneath the sky

Since we discovered the moon's secret, I've shied from looking at it. I didn't think the moon could be anything but evil and sinister, but tonight its light is a heavenly glow around a sleeping Goddess. How did I manage to find anyone so damn beautiful, as beautiful on the outside as the inside? I don't know whether to laugh or to cry; how can the luckiest man also be the unluckiest at the same time? I'll have to give you up soon, leave you all alone when we've finally overcome our shyness. Life sucks, that's the only way to say it; first my family's destroyed by Radam who are holding Earth hostage, second, the fate of the planet rests on the shoulders of a twenty-one year old who'd rather lie next to his girlfriend and watch her sleep. Third...will I have the guts to say goodbye to you? I get so angry Star, I just want to lash out at the world and scream, what about me?!', but I know that pounding my fists against a wall or screaming out loud will get me nowhere. I remind myself I have a duty to fulfil, that countless are counting on me...as you are, to give you a future. I just pray I can see your face when I'm fighting the last battle.

I have such love to give
To Give!
I want a chance to live

I've never been with anyone Star, never loved anyone in a way that would make me think about kids or the future. I realise these words will be of no comfort when I'm gone, but I need you to know how I feel. I've never been any good at expressing how I feel, verbally, I'd screw this up even more than I am now. At least on paper, I can say these things without bumbling and stuttering.

Why didn't you give up on me Star? As though showing your defiance to what would've been best, you stir and tighten your embrace. I should never allowed this, it'll only make it more difficult when I die.

Stop your morbid fascination already and fall asleep... You mumble softly.

You're cute when you're sleepy, you know that? Without thinking, I tighten my own embrace around you and you giggle sleepily. I've tried resisting you, but I can't. I should've known I wouldn't have been able to resist your magical eyes.

Live
For the one I love

I'm not sure what's more frustrating, the fact that I'll die soon, or the fact that I've accepted it. If I could lie in your warmth and do nothing else, I'd die happily and my life would be complete. What's my morbid obsession with destiny, Star? You wouldn't understand, no matter how hard you try or how much you love me. How can I explain how I feel? I know, without question that my next battle will my last; even if I defeat my brother...

Love
As no one has loved

Destiny can wait. I'll make it wait for me as long as I can so long as I'm here with you. So long as I'm looking at you, holding you or making love to you; you'll be my thoughts and not destiny. For now, while we're here in a world free from the scars of time, I'll be the man you want me to be, give you the attention you deserve to receive, worship you as I should've long ago. I'm tired - I've fought enough. Maybe, just maybe my memory will grace me the memory of these final and sweetest days - the love we shared, your strength, your courage. And maybe, just maybe, I can free the world for you.

Give
Asking nothing in return

There is no point in mourning for what you cannot change, embrace what you can and move forward. Shed your tears, but live on my love; live the life I could not. I could never rest peacefully knowing you could not enjoy what I fought to preserve. Remember me, but move on. Love is gift that can come in many forms - I know you'll always love me, but you're still young; too young to give up. Mourn for me; find solace knowing we'll be reunited. Know in your heart that this is the truth, and that I wait for that day.

I'll love, until love wears me away
I'll die, and I know my love will stay
And I know my love will stay

...TO BE CONTINUED

AN

Artist - Tina Arena
Song Used - Live (for the one I love)

DISCLAIMER

Tekkaman Blade/Teknoman and its characters are the property of Tatsunoko. The author of Final Goodbyes has written this for pure enjoyment, not money making purposes. All original characters are the property of the author.