A sort intro before you start: This is an excerpt from the first fic I ever started writing, and it still makes me laugh...that's why I am putting it up here. And also to show you all how awful I used to be at writing, not that I am any better now.
The two main characters are Jessica and Arlyn who are two American exchange students (Yeah, yeah shut up we all have a story like this) at Hogwarts in Harry's third year. It turns out that they are worst than Gred and Forge when it comes to pranks, and they even have a line of candy in the making, which we are introduced to more here. And here it opens up with the two girls sitting in the Gryffindor Common Room talking.
Oh, and if you get confused...my cat's name is Prince. Don't question...just remember.
The weeks passed by rapidly, and soon the days were getting colder and the nights grew longer. Before our friends knew what hit them, it was almost already Halloween...
"Wow!" Jessica exclaimed, "I can't believe that it is already Halloween! I can't wait!"
"I know!" Arlyn laughed, "I wonder how they celebrate it here...?"
"Yeah me too..." Jessica wondered aloud. "I bet our old school is nothing compared to the way they run Halloween around here..."
Both of the girls laughed.
"I wonder if they have a dance?" Arlyn asked.
"That would be a good idea, but I don't think they will..."
"Yeah, it would be cool though," Arlyn agreed.
"You mean it would be wicked..." Jessica corrected her. Both of the girls laughed again.
They had been trying to use more British slang, since they were going to be living in England for the rest of their lives. They said 'dude' way to often, and they soon discovered that it sounded quite odd to everybody if before every sentence they ever breathed began with 'dude'.
"Sounds like you two have been hanging around our little Ilke Ronniekins to much..." A voice said from behind them.
Fred and George had been listening in on the conversation, and decided to join in.
"Hey guys!" Arlyn greeted them.
"What's up?" Jessica smiled.
"No, no Jessica you said it wrong," Arlyn explained trying not to laugh, "You say it like this..." She cleared her throat and said as she stuck out her tongue, "WHAZZZUUPPPP!!!!"
Jessica was laughing so hard that she fell on the floor, her face was turning red, and gasping for air.
On the other hand Fred and George were just sitting there, staring at Arlyn with the faces that read 'That the hell are you talking about?'
Finally they clamed down, but Jessica didn't have the strength to climb back up onto the couch. So she just sat on the floor.
"Oh my god!" she sighed, "I forgot all about that!!"
"Okay," Fred said leaning back on the couch.
"Yeah," George seemed to agree with him, "We are going to pretend we knew what all that meant..."
"Sorry, it's just a American Muggle thing... It's pretty funny...but, no you wouldn't understand," Aryln sighed; she had forgotten that Fred and George wouldn't have the slightest idea about what they were saying.
"Yeah okay," Fred said a smile spreading across his face. "We just came over here to see if you two have that new product?"
"Oh!" Jessica face lit up with excitement, "Let us go and get it...!"
Both of the girls ran up to their dorms...
Harry and Ron sat in their dormitory with Dean, Seamus, and Neville.
"So Harry," Dean asked smiling and slipping on a new shirt. "When are you going to ask Jessica out?"
Harry turned red. "W-why would I w-want to do t-that?" he stammered pretending to be looking for something in his trunk.
Seamus rolled his eyes. "Oh, Harry give it up! Ron already told us u fancy her..."
Harry shot a spiteful look at Ron.
He smiled innocently, "Hiya ole' buddy ole' pal...!" He was prepared to run for his life, but was stunned when Harry didn't make any effort to attack him.
Harry sighed, sat down on his bed, "Well I was going to ask her at Hogsmade, but then I remembered...I can't go to Hogsmade."
"Well why don't you ask her before we leave tomorrow..." Neville said to everyone's shock. Neville wasn't very keen to piping up in these kinds of conversations. "She's liable to stay behind with you if she knows that you can't go..."
"Yeah," Dean agreed, "Then you won't be so lonely." He winked at Harry and smiled evilly.
Everyone laughed except Harry, who was turning redder by the minute. "Ha ha ha...very funny Dean." Harry said trying to cover up is embarrassment.
Just then, the whole boys dorm heard the sound of a door slamming, followed closely by the sound of people running down stairs.
Everyone was quiet until Seamus commented, "Merlin, what did someone tell the girls' dorm that Gilderoy Lockhart was in the Common Room?"
Harry and Ron looked at each other, remembering what happened to them and Gilderoy last year. They stifled laughs.
"Sounds like it," Dean said. "Let's go have a look shall we?"
Everyone followed him to the Common Room to find Jessica and Arlyn sitting on the couch in front of the fire talking to Fred and George.
They all turned around when the boys entered the room.
"Why hello there!" Fred said cheerfully.
"How nice it is to have the third year boys join us!" Jessica laughed.
"What you four up to?" Ron asked suspiciously.
"Oh, nothing we were just talking about you know, stuff..." Arlyn said trying to sound as casual as she could.
"What kind of stuff?" he pressed on.
"Oh well," Jessica said thinking quickly, "Just about Halloween and the Hogsmade trip..."
"Oh," he said still eying them. He knew better let that he couldn't trust Fred and George. And after the lollipop incident with Seamus, he knew he couldn't trust Jessica and Arlyn either.
"So what are you guys up to?" George asked trying to change the subject.
"We decide to come down to the Common room to see what was going on," Seamus said as he sat down in one of the big arm chairs. "We thought we heard a stampede..."
"Oh," Arlyn smiled. "That was us we just...you see, Fred and George here asked us if we had any candy and we told them that we had a few lollipops..."
"Yeah, but this is the only one we could find," Jessica added holding up a yellow lollipop.
Ron, Harry, and Seamus looked at each other and smiled; somehow they knew what was about to happen...
"Yeah," Arlyn said, "Fred and George said that they didn't like yellow. And we don't either so do one of you want it?"
"Nah, that's okay...." Seamus replied. He wanted to laugh at sucker that ate the lollipop this time.
Harry and Ron shook their heads, their eyes wide.
"That's okay," Harry said waving his hands, "Me and Ron will pass..."
"No, I don't much fancy the yellows one either." Neville said.
"Sure, why not? I'll take it." Dean said extending his hand.
Jessica threw the lollipop to him and he opened it and stuck it in his mouth.
Everyone grew quiet.
"Sooo..." Fred said smiling insanely, "Dean, how are you today?"
"Oh I am fine George, or Fred...?" Dean said lollipop still in his mouth. "Hey this lollipop is really good! It tastes like...like pineapple! And yumm...bananas! Wicked!"
Fred and George looked at Jessica and Arlyn.
"It didn't work..." Fred said.
"No, you see this isn't like the other lollipop," Arlyn explained.
"Yeah, you have to say the name of an animal..." Jessica smiled.
"An animal?" George asked bewildered.
"Yep!" Arlyn laughed.
"Go on, try it..." Jessica said pointing to Dean, "Before it wears off..."
"Er, okay... Hey Dean!!" George said.
"What?" he asked.
Suddenly a dazed look came over Dean's face. The lollipop fell from his mouth, and onto the floor. "MMOOOOOOO!!!!!!" He cried as he slipped off his chair and onto the floor on all fours.
"WICKED!!" Fred and George said in unison.
"MOOOOO!!!" Dean said again as he took the rug into his mouth and began chewing on it. The whole Common Room burst into laughter.
"Does it work with only one animal?" George asked.
"No, you can say another one, go on..." Jessica smirked.
"Okay it's my turn George," Fred said looking at Dean, "Hey Dean?!"
"Moo?" he asked looking up at Fred.
Right away a dazed look came over his face again. He dropped the rug from his mouth. His nose began to twitch. He started to hop around, and everyone laughed again.
"Let me have a go at it!" Seamus said laughing, "Hey Dean!"
Dean looked up at him.
Dean suddenly roared. He looked like he was trying to breathe fire, but none was coming out. He seemed frustrated with himself and tried at least four more times then roared with anger.
"Err, Seamus," Harry said looking at Dean, "I don't think a dragon was such a good idea..."
"OOOWWW!!!!! HEY STOP IT!!!!!" Neville yelled, "HE BIT ME!!!!!"
"Hurry! Say another animal!!" Arlyn yelled.
"Unicorn!" Ron shouted.
Dean suddenly started galloping around the couch.
"Hey I wonder what would happen if we said skunk?" Seamus laughed.
"I wouldn't want to see that..." Harry sighed.
But it was to late a dazed look came over Dean's face again. He looked a Seamus and then looked very frightened. He turned around still on all fours. His butt faced Seamus.
"AHH!!" Seamus ducked, "HURRY SAY ANOTHER BLOODLY ANIMAL!!!!!"
"CAT!!" Jessica yelled at Dean. Jessica said it just in time because Dean sat down and started licking his hand. Then he walked around to the back of the couch.
"Is he gone?" Seamus said looking up.
"Yes Seamus," Ron laughed.
"Don't laugh at me!" Seamus screamed at him.
"Well you brought it on yourself!" Harry laughed.
Then Dean running his fingernails down the back of the couch interrupted them.
"Dean stop it!" Jessica said hitting the back of the couch, "I swear he reminds me of my kitty..."
Arlyn and her suddenly sighed in a girly fashion, "Awwww! Prince!
Dean stood up from behind the couch.
"Hello milady," He said bowing and taking Jessica's hand, "My name is Prince Dean," He kissed her hand.
"HEY!!" she screamed jerking back her hand, "I think I liked you better as a CAT!"
"Meow?" Dean asked. He lost his balance and fell onto the floor.
"I think we still have a few bugs to work out," Arlyn sighed
Everyone laughed, but then stopped when the Portrait Door swinging open.
Oliver Wood walked into the Common Room. His head was buried in Quidditch Though The Ages. Why were they not surprised?
His head suddenly popped up from his book and looked down.
Dean was rubbing his back on Oliver's leg.
He purred then looked up at Oliver, "Meow."
"Awww..." Arlyn said laughing and pointing at Oliver, "He likes you!!"
Oliver didn't say anything for a few moments then he looked up at the twins and said, "Fred! George! What did you do to him?"
"Ollie! It wasn't us!!" Fred said laughing.
"It was Jessica and Arlyn!!" George said pointing back to them. They smiled and waved innocently at him.
Another short intro: I decided to put these few lines in here from Chapter 7 because they are just too good not to share. This chapter takes place the day after at breakfast before everyone goes off to Hogsmeade. Here it picks up just as Jessica and Arlyn explain how their candy works...
"Oh!" Fred said looking at his twin, "That's a clever idea! Now George, why didn't we think of that!?"
Harry saw another opportunity again and was about to ask her when Ron said:
"Hey Jessica! Watch this...!" Ron looked at Dean you just happened to be sitting across from him and said, "Hey Dean?"
"What" he asked looking up from his food.
"Moo..." Dean said with a dazed look on his face but then shook his head vigorously, "I said stop it WEASLEY!!" he yelled throwing down his fork in frustration.
The table burst into laughter.
"Stop laughing at me!!" Dean screamed.
"Oh Dean, it was only a joke!" Jessica laughed.
"I don't care!"
"Cat!" Jessica smiled.
"Meow...I said STOP IT!!" he bellowed again.
The whole table was close to tears they were laughing so hard.