Author's Note: Sirius tried so hard to take over this story, that I just had to create a 'deleted scenes' chapter for him. Many of the things he did were quite funny (at least to me) but had no place in my story. So here they are. If you liked the story the way it was feel free to skip this part. If you can't get enough of Sirius, though, you're in the right place.
"You two were in the library?" Lily looked up at the pair, and while James was too disconcerted to continue, Sirius jumped in.
"Well, until we were kicked out, anyway. Pince had never actually seen us before, so she didn't think we were students, and when we uh, accidentally opened one of the books in the Restricted Section about poisonous boils, she was so mad she started chucking books at us from the check-in cart. She tried to hex us, but her hands were so swollen she couldn't hold her wand. Apparently that particular page of the boil book affects only witches, and it was chaos in there, what with the girls screaming and wailing and the books flying about. Good thing we only wear our uniforms in class, hey Prongs? She doesn't even know what house we're in. Anyway, this little book hit James in the back of the head, and when I saw his name on the cover, I grabbed it. Apparently, it tells the future. You guys are getting married, and your kid will be famous and people will write stories about you. It's a how-to book!"
"What have you been sniffing, Black?"
"No really, look!" And with that, Sirius pulled her to the floor to sit in between them. With a very self-satisfied grin, he handed her a slim, shiny book. "By the way, Evans, why didn't you ever tell us the library was so much fun? No wonder you're always studying! I'm going back tomorrow!" Lily looked at him with severe distaste, pulled a lock of her hair out of James' grasp, where he had been surreptitiously sniffing her vanilla shampoo, opened the volume, and began to read.
As Lily and James stepped back through the portrait hole, they had expected to find the common room empty. Instead, they found Sirius surrounded by a group of younger students at the fireplace. Some of them seemed to be studying in books far above their level. Others were opening Sirius' broomstick servicing kit and preparing to wax his Shooting Star for what looked to be the second time, two girls were putting photos of Sirius and his various dates in chronological order in a photo album, and one blushing, starry-eyed Fourth Year was actually giving Sirius a pedicure as he chatted animatedly to her. Lily looked puzzled, but James just groaned.
"Sirius, what have I told you about using your 'special' set of Gobstones against the underclassmen? You know what McGonagall said she'd do to you if she caught you gambling again."
"I know, Prongs, but I didn't think she actually meant it. So Wendy, did Lucie really say that about me? Because I heard that she and -"
"Do you really want to find out? I mean, being transfigured into the seat on Moaning Myrtle's toilet seems - I don't know - a bit unnatural, don't you think?"
"Oh, I don't know. Myrtle's kind of cute. Besides, I've never dated a ghost before. Maybe I should expand my horizons a little. I don't want people to think I'm prejudiced or anything."
"You are so thoughtful, Padfoot."
"I know. I'll have to thank McGonagall next time I see her for opening my eyes. What a gal! Hey, do you think those rumours about her and Dumbledore are-"
"Oh. Black. Stop. I feel ill." Lily sat down on the sofa after shooing the boys hard at work on the Shooting Star, looking a bit green.
"Well, you look ravishing, love. Let's get started, hey? Same time tomorrow, People!" At the stern looks from Lily and James, however, he shook his head at his young minions. "OK. Never mind that. We'll have to reschedule some other time. I'll let you know. Until then, practice at Gobstones, won't you? I want a bit of a challenge anyway. Got the book, James?"
It was a beautiful autumn morning, and James and Sirius were on their way to Hogsmeade to meet Lily. They had been walking with their mates Remus and Peter behind a group of Slytherins, but Remus and Peter had hurried away with their dates after Sirius had ridden Remus piggyback, hit on both girls, led the group in a rousing chorus of the Hogwarts theme song, enchanted rotten eggs to float over Snape's head and attack him every time he said the word, 'mudblood', and eaten enough Blood Pops to turn his entire mouth blood red and spout fangs. All this had happened before they reached the gates of Hogwarts.
"How many more of those nasty things have you got, anyway?"
"Sorry Prongs, you can't have any. I've heard that one of the best ways to woo a girl is with candy, so the rest of these are for the lovely Miss Evans. Too bad you can't compete." Sirius grinned wickedly, his fangs glinting white through the blood dripping from them.
"If you're my competition, Black, I may actually have a chance for once."
"Right. And Snape's gracing the cover of Witch Weekly next issue. Face it, Potter, you can't expect to get a girl like Evans with a guy like me around."
"You're right. She might think you're contagious, and want to stay away from both of us." At this, James broke into a run, as the rotten eggs orbiting Snape suddenly whirled and started chasing after him. Sirius sucked thoughtfully on his Blood Pop, and then called after him, "Tell Lily not to fret her pretty head, I'll be in to nibble her neck as soon as I possibly can."
"So, Lily darling, rumour has it that you punched Thomas for making out with Polly Kirke in the Hog's Head today. Pretty feisty, aren't we?" Sirius grabbed a nearby chair and pulled it up to join the two at the window in the common room, seemingly oblivious to the muffled cries coming from beneath him.
"You're sitting on one of the Second Years?"
"Why, so I am!" Sirius leapt to his feet, grabbed the flush-faced young girl up in his arms, and gallantly deposited her on the sofa next to her friends.
"So sorry, Sheila love, speak up next time, hey?" He kissed her on the forehead and rejoined his friends, unfazed by the giggling little girls on the couch, watching him avidly as they whispered to one another.
Lily felt compelled to bludgeon Sirius about the head with the book a few times.
"Black, you are such a prat! You dare to sit here and tell a girl that you break hearts for fun?"
"Ouch! Evans, ow! It's not all bad. Think of the girls you bunk with. I've provided them with half the drama and gossip in their OW! Quit it!... simple little lives the past few years. Not to mention the fact that they get to say that they went out with me, even if just for a week. It's a public service, really. I just want to serve." Sirius struck what he thought was a noble pose. James did his best not to spurt butterbeer through his nostrils, as Lily swelled with anger.
"Just how do you manage to walk around with that humongous head of yours, Black?"
"Oh, I usually have a bird on each side to help me hold it up, Lov- OUCH!"