Disclaimer: Though I love Mara dearly, I don't own her. Timothy Zahn and Lucas Inc. do. (Not that I wouldn't love to own her if they offered, but unfortunately they haven't)

Memories of Tomorrow

I can't remember and I can't forget . . .

The way your eyes open. Clear blue orbs suffused with power, that still the demon in my head. That make me feel what I should not feel. That call to what I didn't know I had, what I had forgotten (have forgotten? will forget?).

The way they widen in shock. Because you can't feel any more than I can. Because I have you where I want you, but I can't remember what I want you for. Because the great Jedi is in the end only a man, and I am any man's equal. Because my blaster is jammed against your temple so hard, you still have (had? will have?) the bruises. Because I can't pull the trigger.

Memories of tomorrow.
-

I can't remember and I can't forget . . .

The way your eyes open. Spheres of ice with nothing to fill them, except me. It's you and not you that I'm fighting, to still the demon in my head. To feel. To gain a power I didn't know I had, that I had forgotten (have forgotten? will forget?).

The way they blaze with hate. Because you can't feel. Because it isn't you; you couldn't feel that. Couldn't be that cold, that empty, that evil. Because you have me where you want me, and are too empty to know what you want me for. Because in the end, the Jedi will not leave the Light, and I am (have been? will be?) left in darkness, with only the glow of a lightsaber to guide me on. Because I can and do cut you down.

Memories of tomorrow, of next year, of yesterday.
-

I can't remember and I can't forget . . .

The way your eyes open. Electric blue globes with nothing in them except passion, except me. The demon in my head is (was? will be?) stilled. I feel. I glory in the power I know now I've always had, and had only forgotten (have forgotten? will forget?).

The way they fill my view. Because we both feel everything from the other. Because we are no longer empty. Because we are no longer separate and alone. Because we are where we want to be, and know exactly why we're here. Because in the end, the Jedi are only human, and all humans need (needed? will need?) love. Because I can and will look into them forever.

Memories of tomorrow, of yesterday.

The decade past, the decade present, the decade to come.
-

I can't forget and I can't remember and I can't forget . . .

The way my eyes open. I feel you close, in a trance and trouble.

And still the demon screams in my head.

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A/N: For those of you worried about the time frame here. This takes place just before Karrde picks Luke up in Heir to the Empire.

I have a request. If one of you lovely people reading this would get in touch with me via e-mail and help me learn the lingo of fan fiction (i.e. what's a plot bunny? How do you define angst? Etc.) I would greatly appreciate it.

Thank you to all my reviewers on other stories. I promise I'm working hard on "You Already Will" I just can't guarantee when I'll have the next chapter up.