Title: Harry Potter and the Ancient God King, Part 1

Author: Nopporn Wongrassamee aka the Evil Author

Email Address:

Spoilers: Everything!

Summary: The new DADA teacher is something else. Harry and the gang want to know what.

Disclaimer: Characters and concepts belong to their owners who I'm too lazy to list.

"Hi, guys," Neville greeted the trio as they sat down for the first DADA class of the year. "What do think of the new teacher?"

"She's probably evil," Harry said morosely.

"She seems nice enough," Hermione said. "Give her a chance."

"Too nice if you ask me," Ron added. "I'm betting she's like Lockhart: pretty and incompetent."

"Hello, class!" the new teacher said with bubbly enthusiasm. "I'm Professor Winifred I. Burkle, and welcome to sixth year DADA class." She opened her briefcase. "I'm sure we'll get along all peachy keen like. And if not..." Professor Burkle pulled a misshapen skull from her briefcase and set it on her desk. Apparently someone had shattered it and inexpertly put it back together with liberal use of spell-o-tape. Her voice also deepened and Harry could have sworn her eyes flashed blue. "...you are all welcome to join this vermin on my desk." In an instant, bubbly Professor Burkle returned. "But let's be positive. This year, we'll be covering..."

Discreetly, Harry held out the palm of his hand. Ron and Hermione dropped some coins into it.