DISCLAIMER: J.K Rowling own everything recognisable. I make no profit, none whatsoever.

This is a response to the Homomagus Challenge at WIKTT. Either Snape or Hermione must be a Homomagus (like animagus just in human shape, which has one identity and not more like a Metamorphmagus)

Title: Who's the man

Author: Pathatlon


Hermione was standing in front of her mirror in her bedroom, completely freaked out. How exactly this had occurred she wasn't quite sure of, the only thing she was sure of was that she was now a man and owner of a big genitalia.

She had for around five hours into the night of June tried to figure out how it had happened exactly, and she had come down to a conclusion.

Since she was quite sure that she wasn't a Metamorphmagus then this had to have happened because of something suppressed. As logical as she was Hermione had written down her problems, in hope to find a line going through it all. But she soon realised that it might not have something to do with only her, but also her surroundings. So, she had started trying to uncover why she in this moment possessed a penis. A rather large one at that! She had now tamed dark, almost black, hair and green-grey eyes. Her hair was slightly long, down to her shoulders, and she was tall, 5"9 and looked quite handsome, though in this moment she was wearing her female clothes, which was a t-shirt and a skirt, and on her male form this looked tight and quite ridiculous!

"Okay," Hermione said aloud to the emptiness. It was rare occasions like these, very rare, that she was thankful for being home alone. Her parents were celebrating their anniversary in Spain throughout the month, which would give her enough time to get changed, she didn't think her parents would like coming home and find their daughter a man. The problem now was just that there was only a week back of the month.

She picked up the piece of paper she had written on and started to look it through. In the end she concluded that this was something psychological. She had no desire being a male, so she supposed that she was just genuinely sick of being called a know-it-all and was in desperate need of being someone else.

But why now? She wondered and looked through the letters she had received throughout the month. In almost every letter Harry, Ron, and Ginny told her not to read too many books, perhaps that was what she was tired of? She also just spent three weeks with her old Potions Professor, who had started out snarky, but had changed gradually once they got to know each other. Hermione knew she couldn't have changed because of him, because secretly then she liked him. They had been making a potion for the Order, and for the first time Hermione felt that Snape didn't hate her as much as it seemed like. But could all these letters and Snape, perhaps the old Snape, have something to do with this?

"Of course it has! Who wants to be labelled as a know-it-all?" Hermione questioned aloud and threw the letters on her desk. "I am not a know-it-all, I just like to learn new things..." Hermione stopped her light pacing and glared at herself through the mirror. That was it! She was in denial! She was clearly a know-it-all (no I'm not, she told herself), so she had suppressed her true self in hope to get rid of the know-it-all image, and had therefore become... a man. Hermione contemplated things and decided that that was rather unique explanation.

"So, I have denied my true self and therefore turned myself into another identity, a man... and-"before she could come up with a further explanation the doorbell rang. "Oh shit..." she muttered and moved slowly, very slowly, down the stairs. Who could that possibly be? She mused, but supposed it might be a neighbour or something. However, it wasn't.

"Re-... Er..." She was faced with Remus Lupin and Nymphedora Tonks.

"Er... Hello," Tonks greeted, her pink hair shining in the light of a nearby streetlamp. "Sorry to disturb you this late, Mr..."

"Er...Nicholas," she lied, forgetting a last name. "And no worries," there was a moment of pause, where Hermione suddenly realised that it was five in the morning. "Er... it's five a.m.," she informed, suddenly feeling sick. Had something occurred since they were there?

"Oh, yes. We apologise interrupting your... sleep," they skimmed Hermione, who was wearing her female clothes.

"I'm Scottish. This is the newest fashion in kilts," she quickly lied and Remus and Tonks looked at her dubiously.

"Yes, right, well..." Remus clapped his hands, indicating that he needed to get down to business. "Is Hermione there?"

"Er... in the moment?" Hermione asked and Remus and Tonks nodded. "No," she stretched the word, giving herself time to think, and then she shook her head. "Um... she's out. I'm watching the house; we're good friends..." she smiled lightly by her own story. Could this get any worse? "Has something occurred? I know all about magic and that, and I am Hermione's confidential, so if something has happened?"

"No, no," the two visitors assured. "We're going to a... meeting..." Hermione knew they were talking about Order meetings, and she wished she could go. She had just recently been accepted into the Order, "-and just wanted to get her..." Remus finished, looking deeply into Hermione's eyes. She wasn't an adept Occlumens, she had been taught in it light, and she knew Remus didn't know Legemens, so she had no worries about him discovering her secret.

"Um... she's out... But she'll be back in hopefully a few days. She had some rather important things to check up on..."

"OK," Tonks beamed and there was an awkward silence.

"She's doing good? Not longing for her parents or friends?" Remus asked in what resembled to a casual voice. He knew Hermione and Severus had gotten to know each other quite well. Remus knew they were both very intelligent and Remus only hoped this guy wasn't her boyfriend, because he'd rather see her with Severus. Not that he'd say it out loud, but between her friend and Severus then he'd vote for Severus.

"Nope, she's doing great..." Hermione beamed happily. "But I will tell her to owl you," her two visitors nodded.

"How good a friend?" Tonks asked, narrowing her eyes at Hermione.

"I'm actually her cousin..." there was a moment of silence where Hermione mused that it would be better to relate her female and male form somehow. "Mother's side..." Tonks and Remus nodded, and Remus felt slightly better that this wasn't a boyfriend. "Well, once Hermione is home I'll tell her you were here..."