This story is a manual Fred and George came up with, and it's kind of like a journal, only with tips in it. Fred's writings are normal, while when George talks its in italics Bold is when both are speaking. I am working on a website about fanfiction, so if you want to be mentioned then let me know in a review.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, but I wish I owned Fred and George!

Chapter One: How to keep a Manual

Well, hello, just me and Gred here. We decided to keep a notebook together and-

It's gonna be a manual.



Don't cut me off like that, I'm on a roll.


My question is, what kind of a brilliant person can cut his own brother off in writing! It's ingenius.


Anyway, we're gonna write down what we think is useful for life.

Yeah, and maybe we'll give it to Ron or Ginny later. Probably Ginny though, because Ron's a hopeless meathead.

Yeah, we'll give it away, if Mum doesn't confiscate it from old Georgie here first.

Hey! It wasn't my brilliant idea to let out flesh eating slugs in the garden to get rid of gnomes. Besides, Mum only got half of them. The rest are still out there.

Brilliant! Maybe Percy will stumble across one or two. If we're lucky.

Yup. Anyhow, me and my wonderful brother here are going to write down tips for everything.

We might even get to toilet scrubbing later on. ( Yeah, that's most likely what our best friend Filch will make us do for detention.)

Ah, detention! We haven't had that all summer.

I know, which reminds me, we need to think of something to give to Snape as a welcome back gift. Mmm, the fresh smell of evil plotting in the morning.

Not evil, my dear brother, never evil. I find it to be quite helpful. Anyway, back to the manual.

Oh, right.

Here are tips and rules for keeping a manual.

You must be a certified genius. (like me and Fred)

You should have an interesting life to write about.

Always carry your notebook around. ( we find that shrinking spells work the best)

You have to be incredibly good looking. ( I say, I do believe these rules were made for my brother and I.)

They were.


The rules were made for you and me.

Whatever. That pretty much wraps it up.

Yup, gotta go, though. Mum wants to tell us something.

Hopefully Pinhead Percy got expelled. Buh-bye.

Your incredible writers,

Fred and George


Ya like? Please review! And if you're wondering what happened to Snape's Unwanted Relation, I'm still writing. See, I'm real fickle when it comes to this, so I switch back and forth all the time.