It's Always the Quiet Ones
Summary: Shikamaru may be a lot more dirty-minded than we think. It's always the quiet ones, after all... right? Ino recounts to her friends how she got together with Shikamaru.
Sakura leaned forward. "So, Ino," the girl said, "tell us how you got together with Shikamaru."
"Yeah," Tenten chimed in. "Everyone was so surprised when you guys announced that you were going out."
When Ino turned a bright shade of red, all the girls looked on with mild interest.
"Well, um," Ino hesitated, "I'm not sure if it's entirely appropriate to tell you guys..."
Everyone exchanged raised eyebrows. Ino was a huge gossip. If she was holding out on them, it must have been something big... Like something X-rated. Shikamaru and anything remotely X-rated? It didn't seem possible. Now they had to know.
"Tell us," Tenten insisted. "I told you about that time with Neji, didn't I?"
"It's just that..." Ino became redder and struggled with her words. "It was just such a shock when it happened..."
"When what happened?" Sakura was dying to know.
The poor girl couldn't have been any redder. "... Alright, fine," she relented. "But you can't breathe a word to anyone about this."
"Just tell us already!"
"Well, this was back when Shikamaru and I were on a mission in the Wind country..."
That day, Shikamaru and Ino were on a mission together. Not any ordinary mission, mind you. They were sent as ambassadors to the Hidden Village of Sand for a special negotiation and to draw up a new, stronger, definite treaty.
As a matter of etiquette, the two Konoha chuunins were invited to a dinner party at the Wind Lord's palace. Ino was, as always, eager for a chance to dress up, and took special care in selecting a beautiful dress with her newly fattened wallet. It was long and elegant, but two long slits at each side gave it a saucy look that Ino was particularly fond of (just as Shikamaru had a fetish for net shirts, Ino had a fetish for slits).
Shikamaru, on the other hand, simply picked out the net shirt with the least rips in it and his cleanest pair of pants. It was too troublesome to go shopping, and he wanted to wear something that was comfortable to sleep in. The dinner, he said, would be an insufferably boring ordeal. The people from the country of Wind were generally a quiet bunch.
Ino scoffed at his nonchalance and informed him that he simply thought that way because he knew nothing of social gatherings.
She was dismayed to find out that he had been absolutely right.
Ino found herself glaring at her food and forcing herself to eat it daintily instead of stabbing it with her fork. She wished that she had had Shikamaru's insight and worn comfortable clothes, too. Shikamaru stuck out in the crowd of well-dressed nobles, but he was spared from the incredible bore of the event; he was sleeping in his chair, but no one noticed, anyway, since he always looked sleepy and cross.
Suddenly, she felt a warm hand slip through the left slit of her dress and rest on her thigh. Stunned and wide-eyed, she whipped her head towards her partner, who sat to her left. "S-Shikamaru?" she stammered, going pink. For some reason, she didn't try to remove the wandering appendage.
Shikamaru still looked asleep, but his hand was most definitely moving over her leg under the table. He did it in such a way that no one would notice what he was doing except his victim and himself.
Ino didn't want to draw any attention. Blushing profusely from the intimate touch, she kept her voice low. "What are you doing?!"
A slow smile that caused flip-flops in Ino's belly started on the supposedly sleeping ninja's face. She drew in a sharp breath when he took action. In a deliberate manner, his index drew lazily on her thigh, inching up in a painfully slow manner. Her breath quickened almost to the point of panting and she felt faint from all the blood that was rushing to her head. It took a little while for the flustered girl to realize that he was writing something.
Ino, at a loss for what to do, simply nodded dumbly.
Shikamaru's eyes were now half-open, his gaze sultry and warm.
Follow me, then. I promise you that we'll do something very fun.
With that, he moved his hand even higher and squeezed before withdrawing. Ino felt her heart pounding so hard that she was sure everyone could hear it. She watched him as he got up and excused himself before hastily doing the same. As if by some unseen force, her feet moved by themselves as she stumbled after him. Her eyes seemed to be stuck to him, now - she couldn't look at anything else. They roved up and down his form, drinking in every detail.
It seemed like ages before they reached their rooms. It was dark outside, and the halls were deserted. Ino clutched her hands to her chest, willing her heart to slow down as Shikamaru took out his key and unlocked the door.
Calm down, she told herself forcefully. You don't want him to think that you're inexperienced, do you? Look cool and composed, as if you're used to this. A worry hit her. Wait, no, that might not be a good idea. There's a good chance that Shikamaru is the type of guy who feels disgusted by girls who jump around in different guys' beds. Another worry came to mind. But what if he's done this before - because, honestly, what he did back there seems more like what an experienced seducer would do - and gets annoyed that I don't know what to do? Okay... think, Ino, think. Try to remember every single thing you've been told about sex. Ugh, why couldn't we have had guidelines for this or something?
Shikamaru held the door open for her. The light was still dark, and she could barely make out a bedding already set up. If even possible, her heartbeat sped up more. She looked back at him to see that his gray-green eyes were still warmly focused on her and his lips sensually curved into a knowing smirk.
He's looking at me with bedroom eyes, she squealed inwardly. She gulped nervously. What's a girl supposed to do when a guy looks at her that way? She tried her best not to melt into a gooey puddle. What-should-I-do-what-should-I-do-what-should-I-do-what should-I –
"Come on in," Shikamaru said, interrupting her frantic thoughts. His light baritone, drawling voice was a few octaves lower and very husky, causing shivers of pleasure to run up Ino's spine.
Swallowing hard, she stepped inside and waited expectantly.
"Hold on." He turned on the lights and went to his bag. Ino's heart sank when he pulled out a shogi board and turned to her with a trademark lazy, shrewd smirk. "Let's play, then," he announced.
Gone was the hot gaze, gone was the low voice, gone was the exciting, exotic, erotic mood... Gone. All gone.
Ino seriously wanted to hit him. She had never wanted to hurt him so badly as she did now. "What is this?" she shrieked.
Shikamaru winced at the shrillness of her voice. "I thought you wanted to have fun," he complained.
She was absolutely, positively, dangerously murderous. "This is what we call 'fun' in your world!" she screamed, gesturing to the board-game.
He scowled. "Well, what else did you expect?" he wanted to know.
Ino gaped at him. How was it possible for a genius with an IQ over 200 to be so stupid? "You're joking me, right?" she said in disbelief.
Shikamaru sighed. "How troublesome," he muttered. "I'm not joking. I thought you actually wanted to shogi, for once."
Ino spluttered. "Shogi? You were writing messages to me on my thigh! My inner thigh! You literally put your hand under my skirt and molested my damn thigh!"
Shikamaru seemed unperturbed. "Yeah, okay, enough with your troublesome thigh," he said. "Do you want to shogi or not?"
"No!" Ino yelled. Tears started to form in her eyes. "I thought... I thought..." she whispered brokenly. I thought you actually wanted me, she finished in her mind. A lump formed in her throat.
Shikamaru stared at her with a frown. "Oh, no. You're going to cry," he complained.
"You insensitive jerk!" she screeched, tears now falling freely. "I don't want to talk to you, ever again!" She turned away, sobs wracking her slender frame. She wanted to run away. She wanted to get as far as possible from here.
Strong arms pulled her into a warm embrace. Ino froze and found herself pressed against the very person she wanted to escape from. "Let me go!" she cried out, fighting his hold on her. "I hate you! I never want to see you again!"
"You don't mean that," Shikamaru said coolly. His arms firmly kept her pinned against him.
"Yes, I do!" Ino found herself weakening her attempts to break free despite her words. "I mean every word! I hate y -"
Her words were cut off by soft lips moving against hers. Her eyes widened. Shikamaru... There was no way that he was inexperienced, she realized distantly as they deepened the kiss. He knew exactly what to do, judging by the hands that were roving carelessly over her behind and rubbing soothing circles on her back. Ino enjoyed the assault of various new, enticing feelings too much to stop him. He started to work on the tie on her clothes.
"Mmm," she moaned into his mouth before he pulled away. Feeling strangely disoriented, she blinked at him and watched his lips with fascination as the tip of his tongue darted out and moistened them.
"Sorry. I'd chickened out."
What? Ino was confused. She seemed to be lost in the haze of the aftereffects of being kissed senseless by the man she loved (the stupid, clueless man who had made her wait for years before being kissed senseless). Wait... He chickened out? From what? Realization dawned slowly on the girl. "Oh." She stared at him. Sometime during the kiss, she had pulled his hair loose from its binding. Her fingers itched to run through the straight, dark hair so different from her own.
Wordlessly, he pulled her into another fierce kiss and led her down to the blankets.
All the girls stared at the dreamy-eyed blonde with pink-tinged cheeks.
"So, um," Sakura cleared her throat, "you guys just got straight down to, er, business." Her red ears ruined the matter-of-fact effect.
"I didn't know Shikamaru-kun had had relationships with other girls," Hinata said.
"Oh, he didn't," Ino injected.
"But, didn't you say he was experienced?" Sakura demanded.
Ino looked thoughtful. "Well, I asked him about it the next day, and he said that I was his first time... And his first kiss."
Everyone's eyes bulged. "What?" they all shrieked.
"It didn't make sense to me, either, especially because he wouldn't lie to me about something like that," Ino explained. "But, later, he told me that he would look at and observe my body during training sessions and figured out how it works in his head."
Sakura massaged her temples. "That scarily explains it," she muttered. "I guess Shikamaru's not only good with strategies and all that other military gibberish. Should I say a 'well-rounded education'?"
Tenten coughed. "It's so weird to talk about a 'sexy Shikamaru'."
"Also..." Ino blushed further, which made her friends try to edge closer inconspicuously while trying to not look too interested, "later on, while we were, um, you know..."
"Yes?" asked Tenten breathlessly.
"He told me he loved me."
"How?" they all exclaimed. "Tell us everything!"
"He used his tongue to trace out the words 'I love you'," Ino mumbled hastily.
"Where?" Sakura wanted to know. She had been more corrupted by Kakashi-sensei and the traumatizing Icha Icha Paradise than she cared to admit.
Ino averted her eyes. "On my chest," she said quietly.
The girls' eyes nearly popped out of their heads.
"I-I don't think I'll ever be able to look at Shikamaru-kun the same way, ever again," Hinata said nervously, red-faced and ashamed.
"Seems like Shikamaru-kun's got a wild side to him," Tenten muttered. "It must be all the quiet ones. Neji sure surprised me, too, though I can't say it's quite up to your level, Ino."
Sakura sweatdropped. "That was a really subtle, yet at the same time not so subtle, way of telling you something like that, Ino," she commented. "It's kind of a Shikamaru thing to do... but at the same time, it's not."
"That was confusing, but it oddly made sense to me," Tenten agreed.
"I actually thought it was really nice..." Ino admitted.
There was a moment of silence during which all girls silently fantasized about this new, strangely romantic and sensual version of Shikamaru.
Everyone jumped up guiltily. "Shikamaru!"
Shikamaru yawned and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Never mind. I came to pick up Ino, but I'll leave. You all look like you're up to something," he noted, not looking like he cared, anyway. "It's too troublesome to deal with girls who are up to something." With that, he left.
"Hinata, you're right!" Sakura wailed. "I don't think I'll ever be able to look at Shikamaru the same way again, too!"
Tenten covered her face with her hands. "The quiet ones..." she groaned.
A.N. Okay, if you were expecting a lemon or something... well, I'll just tell you that I'm not really the type. I wrote this for fun during prep class to help me get a move on starting my real ShikaIno fic. I thought it would be funny to make Shikamaru do surprising things when he's motivated by love and lust. The idea just kinda popped into my head when I saw a couple snogging like there was no tomorrow on the street (the guy had pointy black hair and the girl was blonde). ¬.¬; At first I was going to make Shikamaru really have brought her to his room to play shogi, but I figured it would be too mean, and made up a different ending.
(Writing Shikamaru is extremely fun, as I've discovered from my "serious" ShikaIno fic. He's terribly addictive, and is one of my favorite characters.)