Watching Movies

By Light-Eco-Sage

Rated: PG-13 for implied rape, language, and some mature humor.

Summery: Weird story of Jak, Ashley (Me), and some of the Jak gang watching movies. I was on a sugar-high when I thought this up. SUGAR MAKES YOU CRAZY!!!!!! MUGHAHAHAHA!! Much Erol bashing.

Disclaimer: I don't own Jak and Daxter, they belong to Naughty Dog. (Bless them!) I don't own any of the movies that are discussed though the coarse of this fic. I own myself though.

LES: Note that any time I make fun of a movie or a person, it is all in fun. This fic is not meant to be taken seriously. The opinions may not be my real opinions. Do not, I repeat, Do not take this fic seriously! Thank you.

Chapter I: The Shawshank Redemption

ASHLEY: It's almost Halloween time, and I'm on a scary movie thing. And Steven King is THE Master of Horror; so, I'm, like watching the 'Shawshank Redemption...'

JAK: ::sobbing::

ASHLEY: Shawshank Redemption is a Steven King movie. Did you know that, Jak? 'Cause I sure the hell didn't.

JAK: Oh, Gods, that is, like, so freakin' sad!!

ASHLEY: What the heck? Jak, are you crying?

DAXTER: Oh my Gods! Jak's crying! Someone call Guinness Book of World Records!... I was joking, Ashley!

ASHLEY: ::puts down phone:: Damn! Let's talk about the movie...

DAXTER: Uh, Jak's still crying...

ASHLEY: ::looks at Jak:: Jeez, Jak, stop crying! You're freakin' me out!

KERIA: ::walks in:: Hey, guys, what are you doing? ::looks at the TV:: Hey, isn't that 'The Shawshank Redemption?'

ASHLEY: Yeah, but right now, Jak is creeping us out with his crying...

KERIA: But, Shawshank is a sad movie. Every time I watch it, I cry when those prison dudes rape Andy...

JAK: ::starts to sob harder then ever::

DAXTER: Ok, that's starting to get on my nerves! Stop it! Stop crying!

JAK: But I totally understand what Andy went though! That stuff really happens in prison!

DAXTER: What? Crying?

JAK: Rape!

KERIA: Oh my Gods!

ASHLEY: Kinda makes you wish you could do your guard's tax returns, doesn't it?

JAK: And I was totally innocent! I didn't deserve any of it!

ASHLEY: Jak, Jak, Jak, don't you know that everyone in prison is innocent?

DAXTER: Oh, oh, I know this one! 'What's you do?' 'Me? Lawyer F###ed me.'

ASHLEY: Daxter! I will not have you using the 'F'-word in my house!

DAXTER: What? I'm just repeating the line! That's what they say!

ASHLEY: I know. Just censor yourself, like this: 'Me? Lawyer (beep)-ed me."

DAXTER: Hey, Ashley! (beep)!... What the heck? (beep)! Hey! I can't say it!

ASHLEY: I'm the author, so what I say goes!

DAXTER: I hate you...

ASHLEY: Hate is such a strong word.

DAXTER: I strongly dislike you.

ASHLEY: That's better!


ASHLEY: Jak, consider yourself lucky. You spent only two years in prison before Daxter busted you out. Andy spent 20 years in prison. He had to dig a hole in the wall, then crawl though 500 yards of I don't want to know what!

JAK: Andy didn't get tortured...

ASHLEY: Andy got raped...

DAXTER: Yeah, and by the sounds of it, so did Jak...

KERIA: ::slaps Daxter:: Shut up, Daxter, you stupid, idiotic, good-for-nothing...

ASHLEY: Ok, maybe I should put in a new movie... yeah...