Finally, Elrond thought it had been plenty of time since Celeborn had gone to Gladdy-Poo. He slipped back into his costume and headed to their talan.

Walking across the way, he stopped suddenly stunned as a strangely clad Haldir and Rumil dashed past him and into Celeborn and Galadriel's talan.

Wondering what on earth those two were up to, he quickly followed them.


Haldir looked at his brother balefully. "I really don't wanna do this…"

"Stop being a ninny and get your ass in there! Fight for our Ellyth!" Rumil shoved his brother through the door.

Two sets of eyes stared at him from the bed. Celeborn lied with his back on the bed, and it looked like Galadriel was trying to see how far she could swallow the Great Silver Mallorn.

"Um…Teleporno…It is I…Venom Dick." Haldir said unenthusiastically. "Fear my wrath…"

Celeborn blinked. Galadriel choked, trying to not laugh around the Silver Mallorn.

"By Eru, Haldir, you gotta do it like this! FEAR MY WRATH, TELEPORNO! IT IS I, VENOM DICK! I HAVE COME TO AVENGE MY ELLETH…and Rumil's…" Rumil pushed Haldir out of the way and dramatically jumped up on a chair near the bed, striking a heroic pose, which would have been heroic if he hadn't missed the jump and fallen down beside the bed.

Rumil, blushed, peeked up over the side of the bed, only to see a hyperventilating Celeborn and Galadriel.

At that moment, Elrond burst through the door. Galadriel's eyes bugged out at the sight of her son-in-law dressed up as Orgasm-O, her eyes riveted to the rigid Rod of Rivendell.

"And this is the father of my grandchildren; no wonder the twins are so weird, though I can see why she likes him so much," she thought to herself, admiring his elfhood.

Then she looked at her husband dressed as Teleporno, and the same thought crossed her mind…

"TELEPORNO, I came as soon as I could…" Elrond trailed off when he saw Galadriel staring at him. "Uh…I see you have defeated the Evil One…" Galadriel narrowed her eyes at a sheepish looking Celeborn.

"NAY, TIS YOU WHO ARE THE EVIL ONE!" Rumil suddenly piped up, forgetting his embarrassing situation, as Elrond reminded him of his Elleth.


Thranduil stormed through Caras Galadhon searching for his son. "When I find that boy…" He grumbled, imagining what he would do to him when he found him.

At that moment, he passed a talan and upon hearing the passionate cries of an Elleth calling out Celebdreth's name, he pushed in the door and walked to the bedroom. On the bed beneath a giant hole, amidst roofing materials, was Celebdreth, finally figuring out what to do with his erection from Mordor.

Beinie looked up at the intruder and screamed, as Celebdreth searched for her special treasure with his 'special treasure.'

"Ahem," Thranduil cleared his throat, and Celebdreth jumped up and stood beside the bed looking at the floor, while a quite breathless Beinie tried to cover herself before the king.

"Where is my son…" Thranduil hid his amusement behind a scowl.

"Uh, I don't know, my lord," Celebdreth whispered shyly, trying and failing to cover his enormous erection that put even Thranduil to shame.

"YOU don't KNOW!? That boy is loose, wreaking havoc! I sent you to fetch him!"

"I know my lord, and I found him…but…but…but then I got a little distracted."

Thranduil's gaze returned to the Elleth on the bed, and he sympathized with the young lad. She was quite beautiful and tempting.

"Alright then…you may continue." With that, the king of Mirkwood left the talan in search of his son, hearing the renewed cries of passion from the talan.


Legolas stood in front of a grinning Elleth, striking poses that best showed off the 'Golden Wood.' He was singing his theme song…

The Elleth looked like she was about to split a rib from laughter.

"Oh for Eru's SAKE! Legolas!" His father's voice cut through the night air. Legolas paled and the Elleth finally allowed the laughter out. Thranduil grabbed his son by the arm and led him away from the hyperventilating female.

"DAD! Let me GO," Legolas whined. "You're gonna mess-up my costume!"

 "I'm gonna mess-up more than that, in about 5 seconds," Thranduil spat through clenched teeth, dragging his struggling son to Celeborn and Galadriel's talan.


All eyes focused on Thranduil as he kicked the door open to Celeborn's bedroom. The scene before him caused him to snort.

Haldir was hiding under a chair as Galadriel chased him with a whip. Rumil was on Elrond's back, trying to pummel him with a feather duster.

And Celeborn was running around singing his theme song.

"ALRIGHT EVERYONE! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!" He bellowed. All figures froze at Thranduil's voice.

Once it was quiet, he softened his voice.

"Now, that I have everyone's attention, I have one thing to say. The next time you guys get this crazy idea to dress-up as Super-Sex-Heroes and Villains, and run about all of Arda entertaining your libidos…"

He paused dramatically.

"I wanna play…"

A silly grin crossed his face as all before him sighed in relief.

However, he did not let go of his son's arm…he needed Legolas to introduce him to the seamstress that made his costume.