Ok, I just realized that this story is a lot like an unfinished one on this site…I think it's called "One Year." Any resemblance is accidental; this is just me attempting to write something that isn't completely happy and fluffy. Still a first kiss oneshot, but with an angsty quality.

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans. But, I do own a ticket stub for yesterday's Green Day concert. Oh, what a concert 

The room went completely silent. Beast Boy, Raven, Cyborg, and Robin were all staring at Starfire with a mixture of disbelief and painful acceptance. Robin vaguely heard a snapping sound; he looked down toward the noise and saw that his hands were clenching into fists, the bones cracking in his fingers and the nails nearly breaking the skin of his palms through his gloves. "Starfire," he said quietly, fighting to keep the tremor out of his voice. "What did you say?"

She looked at the floor, clasping her hands in front of her body and moving one of her feet nervously back and forth. "It is…time for me to return home. Only for a while," she added hastily, interrupting her friends' protests before they could be voiced. "I should be allowed to return before a year has passed…"

"A year?" Robin's voice was still quiet, but it possessed an undercurrent of pain that caused Starfire to flinch. The others looked at each other sadly, understanding what he meant. A year was an awfully long time to be without Starfire. They each took a nervous glance at Robin, who was grinding the fist of one hand into the palm of the other behind his back, the muscles and tendons in his arms standing out frighteningly as he fought for control. He spoke again, making a conscious effort to keep the fierceness out of his voice this time. "You don't really have to go…you don't really want to go, do you?" he asked weakly. Without his anger, he sounded plaintive and lost. Starfire felt tears pushing against the corners of her eyes, but she blinked them back and lifted her head. She wouldn't make this harder than it already was by pretending there was any other way. "Robin, every second I remain on this planet places the Tamaranian kingdom in greater danger. I must return to Tamaran to help my people through a dangerous cold war. My diplomatic powers are required for the survival of the empire."
"Bull. They've done without you so far; why don't they get someone else?" Robin spat out bitterly. Beast Boy's eyes widened, Raven pursed her lips, and Cyborg looked away nervously. Starfire's eyes began to glow menacingly, and Robin was so surprised by this that he didn't notice the tears that were glittering in front of the green fire. She flew swiftly up to him, stopping a few inches from his face.

"You understand nothing about my home world or the politics that have kept it alive. You understand nothing of the duty I feel toward my people. Your selfish disregard for the gravity of the situation is not making this any easier for me, Robin!" She hovered over him, her eyes burning with pain and anger, as the others dealt with their surprise at hearing Starfire yell. Robin stood there for a moment, shock and then shame showing rather clearly on his face, as his emotional exhaustion was too great to hide his feelings. He took a deep breath and looked up at her, defeat causing him to visibly wilt.

"I'm sorry, Star. I won't try to keep you here, but…don't ask me to say goodbye to you." And with that, he turned on his heel and marched out of the room. Star flinched again as the door slid shut, the sound seeming to tear through her. She gave up holding the tears back and let them fall, mixing with those of Beast Boy and Cyborg as the others pulled her back to the floor and gathered her into a hug. Raven wasn't crying, but the lights overhead began to explode, one by one, as she grasped Starfire's hand and told her that she would miss her.


Robin kicked the punching bag with every ounce of strength he had, and delivered a barrage of furious punches that had the bag straining at the seams. His wrists began to ache horribly, but he continued. Think about the pain, he thought. Just keep hitting as hard as you can, and think about how much your body hurts, so you don't have to remember that other kind of pain…He let out an anguished cry and gave the bag a final kick, ripping it from the ceiling and raining plaster and stuffing all over the gym. Robin sat on the floor, breathing heavily and covered in plaster. He picked up a piece of the destroyed punching bag, twirling it uselessly between his fingers. He had no outlet for his torment now, except…and then the tears came, slowly and silently, burning trails down his face as he struggled to rein them in. He grabbed a piece of the ceiling and threw it at the wall, but it was too late to tame his emotions with force. The tears kept falling, and he couldn't stop them. He stalked into his room, determined to find something else to tear to pieces; crying was scaring him, as he had so rarely done it before. He stopped short when he caught sight of the bed. There, in the center, was something small that hadn't been there that morning. He bent and picked it up carefully. It was a photograph, taken from the roller coaster that day at the carnival. Robin was extending his hands over his head and laughing joyfully, and Star was clinging to him around the waist, obviously nervous, but with excitement lighting her eyes. She hadn't wanted to go on the ride, but Robin had told her it was safe, and she had trusted him without a second thought. He smiled at the memory, unconsciously tracing Starfire's face with his finger. Turning the picture over, he saw something written on the back in a neat, rounded script


I am grateful for everything you have shown me. I feel as if the Titans are all my family, but with you I feel the strongest bond of all. Leaving you is the hardest thing I have ever done, and I only hope you will not forget the time we have spent together—for it has meant the entire world to me.



He stared at the note. Then he flipped it over, stared at the picture, turned it over again, and reread the message. Love. So that's what this is all about, he thought wonderingly. Rolling his eyes at his own stupidity, he threw the picture down on his bed and took off at a run for the roof, hoping that he was not too late.

"He is really not coming." Starfire said it as a statement, not a question. She and the others were on the roof, saying their final goodbyes. She shifted her backpack on her shoulder, not looking her friends in the eyes. Beast Boy placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently.

"Robin's going to miss you even more than we are, I think," he said gently. "He just…hates for people to see him break down, is all." Cyborg nodded his agreement. Raven rolled her eyes.

"Coward," she said, glaring over her shoulder at an imaginary Robin. She had no patience with people who unnecessarily suppressed their emotions, and she hated seeing her friend so heartbroken. "He'll send you a transmission once he stops being foolish," she added, trying her best to cheer Star up. Starfire smiled feebly and pulled them all into a hug, holding them as tightly as she could without hurting them. Then, grasping her bag, she took off into the night. She didn't hear the roof door slam open, and she was ready to take one last look back when she felt a hand close around her ankle. She felt herself being tugged insistently back to the roof after having flown only a few feet upwards, and was too surprised to fight against it. She was pulled all the way down and set onto the roof, still facing away until a pair of strong hands took hold of her shoulders and turned her around.

Robin. He was there, holding her shoulders tightly, tear stains still apparent on his cheeks. His face was serious and determined as he studied her, searching her eyes for a moment. Then, grasping her roughly around the waist with one hand while burying the other in her hair, he pulled her against him and crushed his mouth to hers. She gasped and stumbled slightly, which only made him hold her tighter. Starfire felt as if all of her pain, all of her sadness was being absorbed by Robin's embrace. She pressed into him as far as she could, winding her arms up and around his neck, kissing him back with every ounce of strength she had left. Robin sighed, allowing everything he had been holding onto to be released into the kiss. Without either of them realizing it, they both started crying again. It wasn't from sadness this time; it was from finally letting go. They broke and hugged each other, their tear-soaked cheeks pressed together. "I could never forget you," said Robin vehemently in her ear as he stroked her hair. She smiled slightly, backing reluctantly away from his warmth. She ran a hand gently down his damp face as she spoke.

"I should hope not, Robin, for the instant I get back you are taking me on another roller coaster." She let her hand linger for a second longer before turning abruptly away and taking off, flying out of sight. Robin sat on the edge of the roof, staring pensively into the sky with a ghost of a smile on his lips. The others, having gathered themselves from their astonishment at what they had just witnessed, decided that Robin should probably be alone, and they left as quietly as they could. Before they closed the door, they faintly heard a voice whisper something into the empty night sky.

"Goodbye, Starfire. I love you too."

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