Insert Sailor Moon! – By DS Wynne


Disclaimer: "Sailor Moon" and "Ranma ½" belong to their respective owners.

Note: This is an alt-fusion story.


Part 6: "Thunder Mousse!" (I)


The day started easy enough. The birds were singing. Dogs were barking. And a certain perverted grandmaster of the Musabetsu Kakuto ("Anything Goes") martial arts was performing his daily "constitution"….

"What a haul!" Happosai yells, as he hops and skips down the street with his last haul of used panties.

"Come back here, you freak!" Ranma says, as he runs after Happosai. Normally, Ranma wouldn't care about what Happosai would do, but somehow, Happosai managed to implicate him in the theft of the panties.

Happosai glances back.

"Catch me if you can-!" Happosai says, as runs headlong into an angry Akane, and her classmates.

"YOU PERVERT!" Akane yells, as she and her friends proceed to pound on Happossai with all manner of instruments.

WHACK! POW! SMACK-!

Soon, Happosai was in a world of daze and hurt, minus said panties.

"Humph," says Akane, as she and her friends seem satisfied with Happosai's beating. "That should teach you about stealing our undergarment!"

And with that, Akane and her friends leave the scene.

"Well, it looks like you've met your match, old man," Ranma says with a smirk.

Happosai gets up.

"Because of YOU, I lost all my darlings!" Happosai says with anger. "You'll pay for THAT!"

"Fat chance, old man," Ranma says. "I doubt that you can make my life a living hell…at least, not more than it is NOW."

With that, Ranma turns and leaves Happosai to stew in his anger.

"I can't, can I?" Happosai says to himself. "We'll see about THAT…"

Later…

WHACK! WHACK! WHACK-!

"Have you seen Happosai?" Akane says, as she steps unto the backyard, where Ranma was toughing up his fists.

WHACK!

Ranma stops a bit, and turns towards Akane.

"What has he done THIS time?" Ranma asked.

"Nothing, and that's what I am worried about," Akane says.

"Well, I wouldn't worry about it," Ranma says as he towels himself off. "He'll show up whenever he feels like shows up-"

Suddenly, he felt several strikes on his back.

"Hey-!" Ranma began to say, as he turns around.

"Happosai!" Akane exclaims.

Happosai folded his arms.

"You said I couldn't make things worse than you?" Happosai says. "Well, we're just going SEE about that."

And then, he takes out a Happo-Bomb.

"Have fun!" Happosai says, as he throws the large "firecracker" at Ranma and Akane.

"Get down!" Ranma yells, as he throws himself on Akane. The Happo-Bomb sails overhead, and into the drink of the Koi Pond.

BLOOSH!

The resulting explosion caused the water to rain all over the Tendo household's backyard, as well as all over Ranma and Akane.

SPLASH!

"Oh, no!" Usagi says to herself. "I'm all wet!"

"You think?" Akane says. Normally, if Akane felt intrusion upon her personal space, she would get really angry with the offender, and that includes Ranma. However, she couldn't really be too angry towards his female form…since it was so "weak".

"Now get off of me, please."

"Oh, okay," says Ranma-chan, as she gets up. "Why is Grandfather Happosai being such a meanie?"

"I don't know," Akane says tiredly. "Why don't you go…get changed?"

"Oh, okay," Ranma-chan says bubbly. "Besides, I like taking baths."

"…"

However, a short time later…

"Ah!" yelled a scream from the furo.

The Tendo sisters ran upstairs and into the bathroom.

"What is it, Ranma?" Akane says, as she tried turn away. Even if Ranma was in her girl form, Akane didn't want to think she was being a pervert.

"I don't know," Ranma-chan says. "I was suppose to change back to me, but…the water is too hot for me to use."

"Then use cold water to cool it down," Nabiki says with a bored expression.

"I…I did, but…it's still too hot."

Kasumi knelt by the furo, rolled up her left sleeve and stuck a hand into the water.

"Well?" Akane asked.

"The water is…lukewarm," Kasumi says.

"But it feels hot!" Ranma-onna whined. "I don't wanna be a girl. WAAHHH-!"

"Oh, dear," Kasumi says, as she got up to comfort the transformed boy.

Akane just shook her head in disbelief.

"Feh, call me when something more important is happening," Nabiki says with a smirk, while turning to leave.

"That's not very nice, Nabiki," Kasumi says, as she comforted the transformed "boy". "Ranma is in a lot of emotional stress right now."

"So THERE!" Ranma-chan says, as she stuck out her tongue.

"I'm sorry, but Ranma-baby's problem is NOT my concern."

"But…you do know what this means, right?" Akane says. "If Ranma is stuck as a girl, then that means that there is no more engagement."

"Yeah, so?"

"And what if Ranma has to marry Dad to unite the family…or, one of us has to marry Uncle Saotome?"

Although none of the girls knew that Genma's wife Nodoka was very much alive, the thought of uniting the families by having one of them marry a sloth-like person like Genma Saotome hung like a dark cloud over the Tendo sisters' collective heads…

"Well, maybe Dad is ready to marry again?" Nabiki says with a smirk.

"Nabiki!" Akane says. "Ranma needs our help."

"No kidding," Nabiki says, as she sees Ranma-onna grooming herself.

"Oh, my nails…they look HORRIBLE!" Ranma-onna says, as she checked her fingernails. "I got dirt underneath my nail."

"See?"

Akane merely shook her head in disbelief.

Meanwhile…

"I'm HUNGRY," says Ryouga-chan, as she trudged through a dense…park. She then looked up.

"Curse you, Ranma! Why must you torment me by being Akane's fiancé?"

"Ami?" says a somewhat familiar voice.

'That name…it sounds familiar,' Ryouga-chan thought to herself.

"Ami?"

Ryouga-chan turns to see a red-haired girl and a boy with glasses standing in the middle of a bike path.

"Huh?"

"Ami, what happened to you?" the girl says, as she comes running up to Ryouga-chan.

"HUH?" Ryouga-chan says. "Who are you…two?"

"She must have amnesia or something," the girl's male companion says, as he walked up. "Maybe we should take her to see a doctor or something?"

"Um, who the hell are you?" Ryouga-chan demanded.

"Don't you recognize us?" the girl asked.

"No, I don't. Well…you two are kind of familiar, but…"

"See?" the boy said. "Amnesia alright."

"Answer my question, damn it!" Ryouga-chan yells, as she grabs the boy the lapels of the boy's shirt.

"Hey!" the boy replied, as he was lifted into the air.

"Ami, you shouldn't do that!" the girl pleaded.

"Then tell me what I need to know."

"Okay, okay!" the boy said, as he struggled in Ryouga-chan's grip. "I'm 'Gurio Umino', and this is 'Naru Osaka'!"

"We're your best friends, Ami," Naru replied.

"Now, can you PLEASE put me down?" Gurio asked.

Growling, Ryouga-chan does as she is told.

THUMP!

"Ooof!"

"Ami, ever since you and the others disappeared months ago, we were SO worried," Naru says tearfully. "But…if you are here, then maybe the others survived?"

"WHAT others?" Ryouga-chan asked incredulously. "Look, I don't know what you are talking about, so I am going to leave NOW."

"But your mother is worried about you."

"M-mother?"

"Yes. And the fact that you don't know us means you have amnesia," Gurio said.

"Please come to the hospital with us," Naru says. "We can help you."

Ryouga-chan frowns a bit. However…

"Okay, lead the way," Ryouga-chan says. "And no tricks."

"No tricks," Naru says. "Scouts honor-"

Suddenly, an image of five girls wearing Sailor fuku(s) ran through Ryouga-chan's mind…

"Ami?" Naru asked again.

"I'm…fine," Ryouga-chan says. "But…why do you call me 'Ami'?"

"Because you are 'Ami Mizuno', right?" Gurio says.

"Riiiight…"

Early the next day…

"I don't WANNA go to school looking like this, Pops!" Ranma-chan whines.

Genma shakes his head. He leaves the vicinity for ONE day, and his "son" becomes a whining crybaby.

"Boy, girl or not, you are going to school…and that's THAT. Bad enough that you don't want to get up for martial arts practice…"

"Come on, Ranma!" Akane yells, as she throws Ranma-onna's book bag to her. "We're going to be late!"

Unfortunately, Ranma-chan fails to catch the bag in time.

KLONK!

"Owie…"

A short time later…

"It's looks like we're going to get rain," Akane says, as she hears rolling thunder.

"I guess so-" Ranma-chan says, as she looks up, just as a thunder bolt struck close to her feet.

BOOM!

"Ai-yiiiiiii!" Ranma-chan says, as she leaped into Akane's arms.

"Do you mind?" Akane says with a hint of annoyance.

"S-sorry, Akane-chan," Ranma-onna says. "But I'm so SCARED!"

"Come on, you cry-baby," Akane says, as she pulls her fiancé by the arm. "We better hurry to class…"

As the two girls run into the schoolyard at Furinken High School, a lone figure stands on a nearby roof.

"Yes, BE scared," says a longhaired, brown haired girl with green eyes, as electricity crackled ion her hands. "The last time we fought, you humiliated me in front of MY Shampoo! But with this NEW body, you day will SOON be over-

BAM!

Shampoo crashes her bike on the girl's head.

CRASH!

"There you are, Mousse!" Shampoo yells. "Great-grandmother was looking for you!"

"But Shampoo, I'm trying to seek revenge on Saotome-" Mousse begin to reply.

BONK!

"I'm NOT the chimney, idiot!" Shampoo yells. "Besides, we got to go and prepare for the lunch rush."

With that, Shampoo takes out a picture of cold water and douses her head slight. Her form immediately changes to that a raven-haired girl with a slender frame.

"Now, get going!" Shampoo yells. "MARS FIRE IGNITE!"

Shampoo throws a burst of fire at Mousse's feet.

"Yowtch!"

And that was that. However, this did not go unnoticed.

'What has happened to the Moon Princess and the others?' thinks a green-haired beauty, as she sits on her perch while carrying a staff of some kind. 'Something must have happened-"

GOOSH!

The girl feels tiny hands on her rear. She quickly turns to see a tiny old man.

"My, you're a healthy one!" Happosai says jovially. "You want to play?"

The girl, known only as "Sailor Pluto", was normally calm. But never in her considerably long life has she ever face such a "threat" as this…this…

"PERVERT!" Sailor Pluto yells, as she proceeds to use her Time Key Staff to beat the grandmaster of the Musabetsu Kakuto martial arts to a nice pulp.

Tbc.