Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any characters affiliated with Naruto.

NOTES: I write this silly stuff when I am suffering from writer's block. Actually, I wrote this a long time ago on the forums at the now-defunct narutoinfo website. However, a month ago, someone emailed me, saying they had the story saved on his hard drive, and he was wondering if I wanted it. I got the chapters, of course, and now, I guess I'll put them up here on

BTW, if you're wondering about Butterflies, I get to it when I can, but the progress is minimal at the moment. It's the same problem as always: writer's block. Actually, my version of writer's block usually isn't mental; it's always caused by other factors, mostly exhaustion. Between school, work, and life in general, I just don't have the energy to come up with a satisfactory level of writing. Avid readers might have noticed that I've written virtually all of Butterflies' chapters during the winter and summer, when there's no regularly-scheduled schooling.

So, when winter comes around again, progress on Butterflies will probably pick back up again. Until then, you probably should not expect more than one new Butterflies chapter from me. :(

Either way, I hope you like this juvenile humor. It is drastically OOC. You have been warned!


One morning, while Hinata was brushing her teeth, she decided that enough was enough. She was tired of being the nice little girl who everyone pushed around. No, today, she was going to be a different person. She was going to change, just like Naruto-kun had done. She was not going to be a wimp. She was going to be a winner!
Her father yelled from downstairs, "Hinata! Did you clean up your room?"
"Y-y-yes, I did!"
"You better have, you useless weakling!"
Hinata did not reply, as a vein throbbed inside her forehead. F8ck this, she said to herself, as her eyes strayed over to her father's toothbrush, which was sitting before her on the sink. She then giggled evilly as she picked up her dad's toothbrush and swished it around inside the toilet bowl. "Hee hee hee! I'm so naughty! Hope your breath is minty fresh, pops! Hee hee hee!"
"Hey Hinata!" Her little bratty sister, Hanabi, was at the bathroom door. "What are you doing?!"
"I-I-I'm cleaning dad's toothbrush," Hinata replied in her quavering voice. "Wh-wh-what does it look like I'm doing, you stupid b-b-bitch?!"
Hanabi gasped at her older sister's bad language. "Oh my god, you swore! And you're doing something bad to dad's toothbrush! I'm telling on you!"
"Toilet water tastes good though. Honest!"
"It does?"
"Yes, it does!" Hinata then grabbed her sister and dunked her head into the bowl. "See?! It tastes good, doesn't it!"
Her little sister gurgled, "Glaargh!"
Hinata let her sister struggle for a couple moments, then she pulled her out of the bowl. "So, you gonna tell pops or not?"
The terrified Hanabi shook her head. "No! I won't tell, I promise!"
"Better not. Bitch." Hinata dropped her sister. "Tell dad that I'm going out to train with my teammates."

As Hinata walked out of her house, she noticed that cranky cousin of hers, Neji, sitting off to the side. She called out, "Hi Neji! How are you feeling today?"Neji blinked at her unexpected greeting. Usually Hinata just avoided him whenever she could. "Uh, I'm feeling fine, Hinata-sama."
"Oh, I see..." Hinata activated the Caged Birdie Seal on his forehead. "Well then, how you feeling now, BITCH?!"
"Aaaargh!" Neji was rolling on the ground, holding his head in agony. "Stop it! Please stop!"
"Oh fine, just because you said please." Hinata turned off the seal. "Remember, Neji, you're my bitch. Don't you ever forget that. If you even dare to look at me funny, I'm gonna fry your brain into dried-up little rat turds."
Neji was too shocked to respond, as Hinata walked off...
Kiba and Shino were both waiting for her outside the Hyuuga estate. And Kiba called out, "Hey Hinata! What's up?""Nothing much." Hinata sighed. "Hey, let's practice at Training Area #12 today!"
"No way!" Kiba pointed to himself. "I'm the leader, and I say we practice at Training Area #5!"
"Oh okay..." Hinata kicked Kiba in the nards. "Whatever you say, leader!"
"Yowwww!" Kiba rolled around, cradling his nuts while Akamaru yapped angrily at the cackling Hinata. "Hinata, what was that?!"
Hinata ignored Kiba, mostly because that damned mutt Akamaru was being really annoying. "Shut up, you stupid mutt!"
"Yap yap yap!"
"Shut up!" Hinata reared back a leg and booted the howling Akamaru over some nearby power lines. "God damn, I hate dogs."
The ever quiet Shino looked with concern upon his teammate. "Hinata, are you feeling okay?"
Hinata answered his question with her own question: "Hey Shino, is that one of your bugs down there on the ground?"
Shino looked down where she was pointing, and he nodded. "Yes, that is one of my Kikai bugs."
"Oh okay." Hinata smashed a foot down onto the hapless bug. "Well, he's not one of your Kikai bugs anymore, ya hahahaha!"
Shino screamed in anguish as he dropped down to his knees next to the fallen insect. "Nooo, you killed Hubert! Hubert, speak to me! Hubert! It's okay, just hang in there, I'll get you to a hospital!"
While Shino wailed over his downed comrade, Hinata sighed in satisfaction as she looked up to the sky. "You know what. Fuck this training shit. I think I'm gonna go pay a visit to Naruto-kun!"