Screams in the Night

A Lost drabble by Merrie.

Disclaimer: If I ask really nice do you think ABC would give me Sawyer? No? Damn.

Pairings: Kate/Sawyer. I just love the two of them together.

Warnings: Spoilers for Confidence Man

Status: Completed. I think.

Author's Note: while this is far from my first fanfic, this is my first Lost fic, so I hope you will take that into consideration in your reviews. This may turn into a longer fic if anyone's interested as well. There are just not enough good Sawyer fics out there.

Also, this is completely AU taking place after the events of Confidence Man.

Rating: PG-13 for violence, language and major angst.

A woman (mother) screams, pleading for her life, for the life of her child. Her attacker doesn't seem to care or even listen to her pleas before silencing her with a single loud gunshot that echoes through the room, seemingly louder than it should be. Mother is dead. Why is she dead? What had she done? The boy doesn't understand. Why did he do that? Is he going to be killed next?

The man, her (mother) attacker (father) turns to the boy (son) and looks at him just long enough that the boy thinks his 8 short years on this earth have come to an end. He can't understand what is happening. Only that father has killed mother, yelling at her about some man named Sawyer. As the boy sees the betrayal flicker in his father's eyes, he begins to understand. Mother did something bad. Something with this man Sawyer. The boy was smart; he had heard his parents yelling. He had been told that their money was gone by his father before…before this. Was that why father did it? Because he didn't have any more money? The boy had a piggy bank that he had been keeping since he was five. There was almost 5 dollars in there, and father could have it all if…if what? If mother came back? The boy could tell by the way she stared over to him with glassy eyes that she was never coming back.

The boy's father sent one last look at him before putting the gun he had used to kill his wife and the boy's mother to his own temple and pulling the trigger. The shot sent the boy to his knees in a grim mockery of his father's own limp movements as blood spilled in bright crimson rivulets down the back of his head where the bullet had gone through. The boy could only stare in horror as he remained where he was within a few feet of the bodies of his now dead parents. His father had killed his mother and then killed himself. He was an orphan. He knew the word; never thought that it would ever apply to him. But it did. And it was all his fault. All Sawyer's fault. The boy made a vow as he sat there in the silence of death. He would find him, find Sawyer, and he would make him know what had been done. He would…he would make someone understand what he had lost. For yes, the boy felt loss now. He was lost. As an only child with no surviving relatives, there was no one else for him. He was alone and that was how he would remain. Always alone.


The man who now called himself Sawyer, the boy who lost his parents to the man he had taken the name from all those years ago, awoke with a gravelly yell that he just barely managed to rein in before waking up the whole goddamn beach. He slumped back in his makeshift bed and wiped a hand across his sweaty face and hair, trying to will the images of the dream/ memory away with the gesture. It wasn't working.

A soft sigh from somewhere close startled himself into full wakefulness and he quickly scanned his eyes across the beach, squinting in the starry darkness for a glimpse of his intruder.

"You were having a nightmare." Kate's soft voice seemed to float out of the darkness and he turned in the direction it had come from, hoping to catch a glimpse of her.

"So? What's it to you, Freckles? I get my share. If I didn't know better, I'd almost think you were worried about little old me," he drawled.

"I am," Kate whispered.

Sawyer scowled at that. "Don't. I don't need your looking after me like I'm some little lost puppy. Unless you're here to warm my bed I have no use for you."

"And if I am?" Kate asked and Sawyer could practically hear the smirk he knew he would see in her voice.

That was clearly not the answer he had been expecting, but Kate had to give him credit for the ease with which he rolled with her offhand comment.

"Well hot damn, I say about time, sugar. I thought you got all hot and bothered for superdoc. Should have known you were weak in the loins for me. Chicks always go for the bad boys," he said knowingly.

"Just shut up, Sawyer. I came because I was worried about you. Deal with it," Kate said with mild irritation, sounding as if she didn't like the situation any more than he did.


"Why what? Why was I worried about you? I would assume that it was obvious," Kate said, gesturing down to Sawyer's bandaged arm. "Did you want to die? You told Jack to let go and to let you bleed to death. Why?"

"Don't ask questions that you aren't going to like the answers to, Freckles. You'll be far happier that way."

"Why do you do that? Why do you automatically assume that I'm not interested in what you have to say? You don't have to lie to me, Sawyer. I may not know you very well, but I know you better than anyone else here so just cut the bullshit. And don't think I didn't see the expression on your face before we kissed. How many women have you had willingly? How many of them were there because you wanted them to be, not because you were trying to get something out of them?" It was a low blow, but damn, he was good at pushing her buttons.

"Ah, there she is. I was wondering where the firebrand I know and love ran off to. Y'all can't kid a kidder, Freckles. You don't care about me. You may be Miss Save-the-World during the day time with Chief Jack, but here in the dark with me I don't buy it."

She let out a groan of frustration. "God, you're irritating."

"Well golly gee, and here I thought I was charming, sweetness. Must be spending too much time away from the homeland. The southern charm's wearing off."

"Oh, it wore off the moment after you first opened your mouth, Sawyer," Kate said wryly. "What were you dreaming about? And know that I'm not leaving until I get a straight answer from you, even if it takes all night."

He gave her a long look as she moved into his line of sight, his eyes adjusting in the dim light. "Why do you want to know?"

"Humor me, Sawyer."

"My parents, alright? Are you happy now? Satisfied that your worry for poor lost Sawyer was justified?" he asked, each syllable growing bitterer and bitterer.

"Tell me about them," Kate asked gently.

"Tell me about what you did to wind up under the care of your very own genuine federal marshal."

Kate didn't have an answer for that one; didn't even know how he had found out about that, and Sawyer smirked, seemingly victorious. "If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen—"

"I killed a man," Kate interrupted before he could gloat any further. "He was threatening to blackmail my father. We didn't have any money to pay him, so I killed him."

"Intentional or accidental?" Sawyer asked, keeping his voice free of judgment. Guilt at fact that he had blackmailed a few fathers himself wasn't so easy to hide.

"Does it matter?" Kate asked with a frown. "I killed him. It doesn't matter how."

"And do you regret it?"

After a long moment of silence, Kate answered in a wavering voice, "No. He would have killed my father. Maybe not by murder, but he would be dead all the same after that man got through with us."

"Then stop beating yourself up over it, Kate. It was self defense. It doesn't matter how it happened, if you hadn't killed that man he would have killed you. You stopped him, pure and simple."

Kate blinked back the tears that had been threatening at his use of her real name. She didn't fully agree with him, but she didn't refute his explanation either. "It's your turn. I told you what I did, and now it's your turn to tell me about your parents."

After a few long moments of contemplated silence, Sawyer did.


A/N: This is meant to be a one-shot fic, but with proper motivation I could possibly write something longer. I like writing super long fics. Anyway, I hope everyone liked it. Please review!