Title: Wintertime Shenanigans

Author: Jade Hunter

Disclaimer: None of the characters or properties of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Smallville belong to me.

A.N.: In answer to #105 at the FFA. It didn't specify Lex Luthor from which continuity, so I just chose Smallville, since everything else would pretty much gross me out.


Lex sighed as the call had absolutely no affect. He had really messed up this time, and she had been in a holy snit since last week. Every time he tried to approach her, she would hum something, or sing something under her breath, a song he couldn't quite make out the lyrics to, and simply ignore him.

Of course, Lex Luthor was nothing if not persistent, which was why he was tromping through a foot of snow behind his manor.

"Buffy," he called again, and added, "I'm trying to apologize, here!"

Something he was getting very used to, with this girl. All of his past girlfriends (if they could be called that) had been easy enough to mollify when he'd inadvertently insulted them. He had simply showered them with expensive jewelry, something that cost a pretty grand or two, and they would squeal happily and promptly forgive him.

Except, he had quickly found out, it didn't work so well with Buffy.

Oh, the minor trespasses, he could be forgiven with the right trinkets. But for the major faux pas, there was no gaining back her affections until she was properly convinced of his sincere regrets, that he was not just saying so to pacify her.

It was strange, in a good way.

Clark said she did him good, and Chloe's sentiments were similar. Even Lana and Pete were in agreement, which was saying something. His father said she made him weak.

Lex rather agreed with Clark and his friends.


Whirling, Lex reached behind and felt the area of the impact. His glove came feathered with snow - someone had hit him with a snowball.

Well, there was no question as to who that someone was.

"Buffy," Lex sighed. "I'm sorry."


This one hit him square in the chest.

Obviously, sorry was not good enough. Unperturbed, he headed in the direction from where the snowball had originated. "Please, can we talk?"

Pulling out the big guns, saying please already. Surely Buffy would take it as a sign that he was really sorry?


Apparently not.

Brushing off the snow from the back of his pants, Lex sighed and did a turnaround, heading in the new direction, though he knew it was futile. Buffy was the Slayer; it would be impossible for him to catch her if she really didn't want to be caught. But, similarly, if she was truly boiling mad, her snowballs would have been packed a lot harder, and thrown with far more force.


Sighing, Lex decided to pull out his main weapon, "I hired a private plane to take us to England, tomorrow at three."

No snowballs.

Relieved, he walked over to a stone bench, dusted off the show that had layered on top of it, and sat down, mindless of the ice that caked the surface. "Can we talk, now?"

The sound of snow crunching under boots was his only warning before his petite girlfriend sat down warily next to him, nose red from the cold, breath coming out in visible puffs. Despite that, her cheeks were flushed with anger, and her brows were furrowed, the corners of her mouth pulled down.

"I'm sorry," Lex said again. "I should have asked you before I agreed we would to go to that party."

She remained silent, glaring at him balefully. Her fingers were tapping out a strange beat, and he could imagine that it was the beat of the song that she'd been humming all this time whenever she saw him. It had gotten so bad that he'd been hearing the damn tune in his dreams; he could imagine hearing it anywhere, even in the tap of Buffy's fingers.

"And I cancelled, so we can go visit your family for Christmas," Lex finished. "I swear. Tomorrow at three, there will be a jet at the airport that will take us to England."

"You swear?"

The relief rushed in like high tide. "Yes. I swear."

She smiled grudgingly, "Okay, then."

"I'm forgiven?" Lex asked hopefully. Having Buffy mad at you was not something good for your health.

Shrugging, Buffy nodded half-heartedly. She was still resentful that he had even considered making her forego a visit to her Scoobies, and although the visit was a good start, it wasn't forgotten by far. He would have a lot more to do to earn enough of her forgiveness that she would start forgetting.

But, it was still a good start.

Wrapping an arm around her, Lex sighed, "Okay, then."

They sat there for a while, in the cold, until the chill had seeped in through their winter clothes, and the ice underneath their butts had melted and soaked their pants. Then, Lex helped Buffy up, even if she didn't need it, and she let him, because she liked chivalrous gestures like that, and they trouped back to Lex's manor.

"By the way," he asked as they were heading in. "What was that song you kept humming?"

She looked surprised that he hadn't recognized the tune. A little smile made her way across her face as Buffy realized that her subtle way of digging at him had been useless, since he hadn't even known what song she'd been annoying him with.

"Nothing," she answered finally, stomping her feet to dislodge the snow stuck to the soles of her boots. "Just a song."

She took off her coat and scarf and hat, giving it to Lex, and danced into the manor, all the while singing under her breath.

"You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch / You really are a heel / You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch / You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!"