Kaitoumiko: I should be working on Yamato in Wonderland but…I still have to salvage it from my old broken computer…that's right I actually have a new one!

Taichi: You know, it's bad enough you are way behind schedule…

Yamato: And now she is starting a new one…I knew she couldn't finish what she started

Kaitoumiko: I don't want to retype everything again…and I am going to finish it.

Yamato: It's karmatic law! It's what you get for postponing things…procrastinator.

Taichi: She doesn't own digimon. Taito kinda limeish…Daiken and implied Takori. And this is a response to Rae's challenge "Dialogue in a Bathroom."

Yamato: The rules are as follow.

1) There can be more than just dialogue, but I want the basis of the story to be 'speaking.'

2) The story cannot LEAVE the bathroom. At all. For any reason. If you have to literally lock your character(s) in, do it. For no reason should the story leave the bathroom. (Yes, I'm strange.)

3) It can have as few as one characters, I will accept monologues. There is also no maximum limit of characters allowed, so if you wish to have a story with two football teams sharing a bathroom for some odd reason, please do.


And enter Taichi…


"Yama, I'm coming over."

"You're what?" Yamato turned to look at the receiver, "I'm about to take a shower Taichi, come later." True to his word, he currently stood clad only in a skimpy white towel that hung low around his waist. The far away hiss of a running shower urged him to hurry and stop wasting water.

"Don't take a shower, I like how you smell." -click-

"Tai—" he frowned at the phone plunking it down in its place. "Why can't he just listen to me for once." He grumbled to himself as he stepped into the shower.

What had started as a romantic sleepover had turned into a straight out all boys night as Takeru, as well as Daisuke and Ken—by default—had invited themselves over, having heard Yamato's dad was going to be gone for the weekend, and his brother's virginity was being threatened.

And it was for those reasons that he was currently cursing them over. But he was slowly calming down as he washed his hair and rubbed soothing circles on his scalp.

He had just finished rinsing his hair when he heard to his horror, the bathroom door shut with a quiet click.

Yamato threw the shower curtain open and stared at the offender, who cheekily smiled back.

"Taichi you bastard!" he shrieked. "You just locked us in the bathroom, you idiot!"

The boy stared at the blonde. "Since when are you claustrophobic?"

Yamato sighed and shut the water off having realized he had managed to make a puddle on the tile floor. Taichi helpfully handed a towel to him. He dried himself hastily and wrapped the damp towel around his waist crossly.

"Taichi?" he asked peevishly, sitting on the floor.

"Yes, love?" The brunette responded, plopping down next to him.

"Do you realize what you have just done?"

Taichi looked up dramatically, drumming his fingers on his lips in feigned thoughtfulness. "Let's see, I…snuck into your apartment using the key I stole from you last night, infiltrated your bathroom and saw your sexy ass wet and naked?"

Yamato rolled his eyes. "You just locked us in, jerk."

"You already said that."

"Well, it doesn't seem to have sunken into your thick skull."

"Calm down, I just closed it Yama-sama." He got up to prove this point, but the knob in his hands wouldn't budge."

"Like I said, you locked us in. The lock is broken, it only opens from the outside."

"Why didn't you just say that in the first place?"

"Because I thought it was obvious."

"How is that obvious?" Taichi demanded incredulously.

"Why else would I say 'you locked us in' and why else would I take a shower with the door open?"

"Because you have a tendency to be over dramatic and you didn't want to fog the mirror?"

"It was a rhetorical question."

"Both of them?"


"You didn't specify."

" 'rhetorical questions,' happy?"


A small silence ensued but was interrupted by Yamato's chattering teeth.

"Cold, Yama?"

"What do you think?" After all, he was sitting on the cold tile floor wrapped in a damp towel, in winter no less.

Taichi took his sweater off. "Here, it's getting hot in here anyway."

Yamato looked at him crossly but snatched it from him anyway, thankfully putting it on. "Now we are stuck till my dad comes home…"

"Or until your brother and company come to save us."

"He doesn't have the key."

"Funny you should mention that…"

"What's so funny about it…"

"I kinda left your front door open."

"You what?"

"Just a crack, really." Taichi defended, scooting closer to the door and away from Yamato.

"Great." Yamato flailed his arms. "Now we'll get robbed."

"See, you are over dramatic."

"I'm not being over dramatic."

"You flailed your arms."

"Out of exasperation."

"Flailed nonetheless."

Yamato sighed. "Whatever." He shook his head and glared at Taichi. "How could you leave that door open and close this one?"

Taichi shrugged. "No one will notice. You're not even on the first floor, so it doesn't matter."

There was no point arguing with Taichi, and it didn't matter anyway, since there was nothing either one could really do about it. And at least, they could leave the bathroom in a few hours.

"Still cold?"

"A bit."

"Want my pants?"

Yamato smirked. Only Taichi could make that sound dirty. "Won't you be cold?"

"I'm hot what are you talking about."

"You know what I mean."

"Nah, it's kinda stuffy in here anyway…and you are welcomed to keep me warm." He waggled his eyebrows.


"You're no fun, Yama." But he took his pants off nonetheless and handed them to him.


"No problem. It's my duty to help those in need."

"Are you saying you'd take off your pants for anyone?" he asked slipping into the pants.

"No…Yama, stop being mean…I'm trying to be princely here."

Yamato laughed. "I can't see you as a prince, Taichi."

The brunette frowned. "What do you mean; you can't see me as a prince. Look at me! Prince charming in the flesh!"

This only made Yamato laugh harder. "I don't know Tai, I see you more as a knight in somewhat shiny armor."

Taichi glared indignantly. "You bumped me down to a knight and my armor isn't even shinning?"

"Look at your hair," he said pointing to the unruly brown mass atop Taichi's head.

"For your information, I style it every morning."

"By running a hand through your head when you wake up?"

"Ha ha, very funny."

"Anyway, you have a grease stain on your pant." He said pointing to the stain on the pant leg.

"Fine." He pouted. "But that makes you the damsel in distress.

Yamato gaped at him. "How does that make me a damsel in distress?"

"Well, since I'm not a prince you can't be a princess, so you are a damsel in distress."

"What makes you think I'm not a princes—prince."

Taichi rolled over laughing. "Too late Yama, you can't cover that up you called yourself a princess."

"That—that—" he fumbled. Taichi only laughed harder when he looked up to see how red he had turned.

Yamato waited indignantly, until Taichi had regained his composure.

"That still makes you a damsel in distress though," Taichi stated wiping the tears from his eyes.

The blonde huffed and set his chin on his knees. "Not like it matters."

Taichi poked at Yamato's ribs. "C'mon Yama, I was only playing."

He couldn't help but giggle at the incessant poking. "Taichi stop it." He swatted at the offending hand.

"Not until you say I'm prince charming."

"Taichi!" he pressed himself further on the wall in an attempt to escape Taichi's probing fingers.

"That's not the magical word, princess."

"I can't breathe."

"Say it."

"It." He said between gasps and giggles.

"Very funny princess, what are we in fifth grade?"

The brunette avoided an attempted kick, pinning Yamato successfully to the floor.

Yamato wheezed trying to catch his breathe.

"Say it."

The boy only shook his head.

Taichi nipped at the boy's nose. "Princess Yama…" he wheedled.

The blonde only shook his head defiantly.

"Hmmm…" Taichi looked down at the boy pensively. He looked so cute disheveled and pinned to the floor. "This calls for extreme measures."

" 'Extreme measures'?" He arched an eyebrow.

"It seems like the princess is currently in denial and needs the truth extracted from err—him."

"Wouldn't that statement make me a prince though?"


"You say princess…which refers to a girl but then you say him…so it make me a boy—which I am by the way if you hadn't noticed."

"You're a boy?" he asked in mock astonishment.

"No, I'm just flat chested and have an extra appendage."

"Very interesting." Taichi smirked.

Yamato didn't like the tone in his voice.

"I wonder where and what this extra appendage is."

"Taichi, you just saw me."

"Did I?"

"When you locked us in the bathroom!"

"I don't seem to recall…maybe the steam was blocking the view."

Yamato was about to argue that he had gotten a good long stare at him but decided not to. There was no stopping Taichi when he got in this frame of mind.

"It's time for some exploration." He declared, shifting his weight so that he could hold both the blonde's arms down with one hand and 'explore' with the other.

"Explo—wait Taichi, what if my brother comes."

"Let him come." He slid his hand below the sweater, running his fingers along the planes of the boy's stomach.

"That sounded wrong Taichi."

The brunette smirked. "Someone is thinking naughty things."

Yamato blushed. "You're the one that said it so suggestively."

Taichi shrugged. "They won't come so early."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because, they have to pick up Ken all the way in Tamachi."

"What if he meets them here instead?"

"He won't," He lifted the sweater so that he could claim the "princess' " flat chest with his mouth. "Daisuke and Takeru had a huge argument over it." He said between sucks and nibbles.

"Over picking Ken up?" he was beginning to breath heavily, regardless of his attempts to keep it even. " What are they romantic rivals now?"

"No, Takeru said Ken could ride by himself," he said swirling his tongue around a pert nipple. "Daisuke said perverted creeps that can't keep their hands to themselves ride on trains."

"How cute." He gasped.

"Isn't it?" Taichi smiled, trailing kisses down to the boy's stomach. "I wouldn't want you riding alone either; I'd want to beat the bloody pulp out of anyone who laid a hand on you."

"What am I your property now?"

"Damn right." He said, moving up to kiss the boy on the mouth.

Yamato smiled into the kiss. It had a nice ring to it.

"So, Daisuke and Ken are going to meet Takeru at his house or what?" he asked breaking the kiss.

"No Takeru tagged along to make sure that Daisuke and Ken make it over here and don't become distracted."


"That's why it is necessary to inspect you to see if you really are a princess. Though if you are, you certainly are flat chested."

Yamato squirmed to loosen Taichi's grasp so he could smack him upside the head, but settled on biting him playfully when the brunette decided to kiss him again.

"That hurt Yama" He pouted.

"Serves you right."

But his sulkiness didn't last long, as his gaze slowly dropped to Yamato's lower half.

"Haven't looked here." He murmured to himself. "Maybe the legendary appendage is here?"


Taichi shrugged. "Everything is legendary in fairy tales, princess."

Yamato rolled his eyes.

"How did I end up being the princess anyway?" he gasped lightly as Taichi began unbuttoning the pants.

"Because I'm the knight in somewhat shiny armor." He said matter-of-factly, pulling down on the pant's zipper. "And it's easier to say than 'damsel in distress'."

He glanced up at Yamato, "Looks like I found the legendary appendage, princess." He ran his fingers along the blonde's waist line. "Guess you are a boy."

"Taichi, this isn't the bes—"And he interrupted himself with a loud moan as Taichi had decided to see if the legendary appendage was edible or not.

So it was with good reason that neither boy heard Takeru announce their arrival. Nor did they notice that four boys had assembled outside the bathroom after hearing muffled voices being emitted from within.

At least not until something knocked on the door loudly and was answered with a moan.

"Oi, you guys just scarred Takeru for life."

Taichi disengaged his mouth and replaced it with his hand, to answer, "How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough" came Ken's muffled reply. "Takeru is having a fit."

"That's nice." Taichi leaned over to kiss Yamato full on the lips. "Go watch tv for awhile"

"This is more entertaining." replied Daisuke.

"Didn't think you guys were kinky enough to do it in the bathroom." mused Ken.

"Taichi," Gasped the blond, "shut up." He was really too far gone to care who the hell was outside the door all he wanted was to…

"Come on Takeru, it was gonna happen eventually." Daisuke stated. "Stop sulking."

"Taichi open the door." Takeru shouted banging on the door.

"I can't we're indecent."

"Yamato, what is he doing to you." demanded the blonde on the other side of the door.

Dammit, he thought. And made an attempt to push Taichi's head in the right direction, but Taichi only shook his head.

"I'm talking Yama. I can't do that and talk at the same time."

"That's too much information Taichi."

"Iori's here?"

"Yes." He stated. "Now open the door, Takeru is going into hysterics."

"Maybe he's jealous cuz' you're prudish Iori."

"Open the door or die." Came the seething reply.

"I would, but unfortunately the door only opens from the outside."

A scuffle and a few insults were heard but the door didn't open.

"We'll be back in awhile so hurry up, we can't hold them back forever." shouted Daisuke.

"Really Taichi, out of all the things you could say." admonished Ken

Taichi only smirked and went back to what he was originally doing.

And thus he found that the legendary appendage was partially edible.

Though it would be awhile before Yamato and consequently Taichi, could muster the courage to dignify their guests with their presence.

Not that they were let out of the bathroom any time soon.

The End


Kaitoumiko: Taichi, I thought I told you to keep it rated PG.

Taichi: Look at him though!

Kaitoumiko: -looks- Point taken. Well, as a leap of faith I labeled it as PG-13. I don't think it was strong enough to be R...if you believe so I'll change the rating..Ack I can't help being paranoid!

Yamato: Taichi said it was limeish in the disclaimer...More importantly, you cheated it wasn't fully in the bathroom.

Kaitoumiko: Well..okay so Yamato was not in the bathroom for the first few lines but then he was! With Taichi even, the rest of the fic!

Yamato: What about the peanut gallery?

Kaitoumiko: But the main dialogue was in the bathroom.

Yamato: A cheater and a procrastinator. I give up.

Taichi: review please…