Until The Day I Die

Author: Pumpkin Belly

"You remind me of the times when I knew who I was. But still the second hand will catch us like it always does."

"Spike?" Buffy whispered sitting up in the bed she was currently sharing with Spike.

"Humm?" Spike asked not moving from his position on his side.

"Are you asleep?" Buffy asked looking over at Spike.

"If I answered you, how could I be asleep?" Spike asked rolling over and propping himself up on one elbow to look at Buffy.

"You could have been sleep talking." Buffy suggested.

"What's wrong, luv?" Spike asked.

"I couldn't sleep." Buffy answered.

"What would you like me to do about that, pet?" Spike asked with a sigh.

Buffy looked at Spike thoughtfully for a second, "Nothing. I'm sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep." Buffy responded falling back into the bed and rolling on her side so her back faced Spike.

"I'm sorry, luv. Sometimes I can be such a prick sometimes." Spike said moving closer to Buffy, laying a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"No, it's not your fault. I shouldn't have woken you up. There's nothing you can do." Buffy said, tears in her voice.

"Oh don't cry." Spike said rubbing her arm.

"I'm sorry." Buffy said trying to stifle her tears but failing.

"No, no don't be sorry. God, I should be sorry." Spike sighed, "I can't stand to see you cry." He confessed.

Buffy sat up and tried in vain to calm herself, "Everything's just been so crazy lately." She said wiping at her eyes. Spike looked at her expectantly but didn't say anything. Neither did Buffy for that matter. Spike opened his mouth to say something but Buffy chose that moment to continue.

"I shouldn't have left Dawn alone. What if something happens? Why didn't I call Xander or Willow?" Buffy seemed to have forgotten that Spike was even in the room let alone right next to her. She was talking to fast Spike had to strain to hear her at all, "God I am such an idiot I didn't even think to call someone because I was too busy thinking about spending the night with Spike. I was too busy worrying over a guy I have feelings for to think about the well being of my sister. The only family I have left. I should be shot. I should be hanged. I am the worst sister ever." Buffy said finally taking a breath and looking over at Spike.

Spike was staring at Buffy with a look of shock on his face. For one she had said all that without pausing for a breath and she has confessed that she has feelings for him.

"You're not the worst sister ever and none of those awful things should happen to you." Spike said alerting Buffy that he had heard everything she said.

"Oh god." Buffy groaned, "You should have stopped me before I rambled through my whole life and divulged all my secrets."

"I don't know, pet. I found what you said very interesting." Spike smirked sitting up so he was level with Buffy instead of leaning on one elbow.

"Ugh!" Buffy sighed pulling her legs up to her and leaning her head on them. She looked up at Spike, "Really?"

"Look, Buffy. You know how I feel about you. I love you. It's not that bad admitting your feelings." Spike said.

"It's not that bad for you, Spike! It's harder for me. I don't know who I am. I'm so lost in my life since my mother died. I'm balancing all these rolls and then I like you and that just confused me more. You're not like that at all. You know exactly who you are." Buffy sighed.

"I've had over a hundred years to figure it out though." Spike smiled, "I didn't start out this bad and sexy." He said causing Buffy to smile.

"Thank you." Buffy said sitting up.

"Why don't you call Dawn and make sure she's ok." Spike suggested.

"It's kind of late." Buffy said looking over at her watch.

"You know you want to." Spike said.

"Yeah I really do." Buffy said climbing out of the bed to get her phone.

"Buffy?" Spike called.

"Yes?" She said looking back at Spike.

"Do you really have feelings for me?" Spike asked, hope in his eyes.

"It's not love, but it could be." Buffy said.

"Come here." Spike said calling Buffy back to the bed. She obliged him taking her cell phone with her, "I love you." Spike said pulling Buffy into a kiss.

Before his lips connected with hers several things happen. Buffy's cell phone went off with a piercing ring, causing Buffy to pull back. And at the same time a loud crash was heard in the upper part of Spike's apartment.

"Damn it," Spike cursed pulling away from Buffy.

"Hello?" Buffy asked cautiously into the phone, "Dawn, is that you? Speak louder I can hardly hear you. WHAT? No I just. I'm stuck here Dawnie. I don't know when. Dawn I have to go you're breaking up. Love you, bye." Buffy said closing the phone.

"Spike?" Buffy called out.

"Shh." Spike said placing his finger to his lips.

"What's going on?" Buffy whispered.

"Didn't you hear the loud crash?" Spike asked.

"No, what is it?" Buffy asked back.

"Someone's trying to break through the shield."

TBC

A/N: WOW a plot!? So unexpected. This was going to be all Spuffy without a plot but then someone suggested it and look what happened. I don't know if I like the direction this went in so please review and tell me if you hate it or love it or only like it. Doesn't have to be one extreme or another. What did Dawn call about? Who's trying to break down the shield? Stay tuned to find out.