Seduce This Broken Body
R
Summary: Joe comes to term with his losing battle, but who will he hurt when he finally opens up his heart and bares his soul?

This is a Mimoe for Glay, who has to be the nicest person I've ever had review me. Thank you so much Glay!!! If you ever want a fic, tell me! I thought I'd give you one as a surprise!

Also, thank you everybody for the nice reviews! Keep them coming! I love them!!

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He leaned against a dark, shaded height away from the sunlit circle within the barriers of innocence. His dark blue eyes watched the shining actors on the stage before him, some vibrant and glowing, others dim and moody.
All were happy, all were within the purity of souls.
Joe was not.
His stormy indigo hair swept aroung his face as he watched them darkly. His back was braced against the bark of the tree, causing the black cotton of his t-shirt to pick up debri. He had a jean clad knee pulled up, and he rested his muscular arm upon the denim. Joe appeared relaxed, inside he was coiled like a snake.

He sadly surveyed the Chosen Cildren

Courage, the word held no meaning for him anymore. To him, courage meant rushing headlong into a dangerous situation without knowing the possible outcomes.
Courage was stupidity.

Friendship, merely a facade. A mask used to hurt others in order to hide inner pain.
Friendship was abuse.

Knowledge, had lost it's potential. Now it was how many facts and figures you could spew forth in the span of 60 seconds.
Knowledge was a mindset

Hope, only a wish. Desperation for those hanging on the bottom rung.
Hope was futile

Love, a beautiful dream. A lonley wish for others as sorrowful as himself.
Love was wistful

Light, a faded hope. The end of the tunnel was dim to his eyes.
Light was paling.

Kindness was trivial. A barrier to the nasty inner thoughts.
Kindness was hiding.

Sincerity, a need for fake security.
Sincerity was believing in weak hopes.

Reliability, was linked to sincerity, though not in the way he wanted.
Reliability was wanting.

He didn't hate the digidestined, merely was embittered to what they stood for. It seemed, as he watched them chat and wrestle and hug in their circle, all but one had forgotten him.
He needed her to forget him, because she was not his despite the fact he possesed every part of her, and she of him.
Angry for what he could not share with the world, he stretched his lanky form and unfolded himself from his recluse.
Pushing his navy ponytail behind him, he strode away from their chaste gaity...And her lost, topaz eyes.

He was skipping rocks across a small pond when her soft, small footfalls reached his burning ears.
He sighed, his sadness breathing through the sound.
"You shouldn't have come."
Joe didn't turn around, he kept his eyes pinned to somewhere, anywhere but her secretly cherished face.
He pushed his wire framed black glasses upward, agitated. The gesture's familiarity comforted him, and some of his inner anger smoothed away.
Agony he could not let out swiftly replaced it. Now he dared not turn around for fear of her seeing the agony etched within his sapphire eyes and along the firm line of his mouth. He clenched his jaw as her sweet voice rang through the summer breeze, the gentle sound sent shards of painful rememberance through his soul.
Did she speak like that to him? Did she look at him all soft and dewey? Jealousy tore at his shredded soul, and he clung, once again to anger in order to stifle his hurt.
"You knew I would."
His usually gentle voice was harsh and grievious, as he bit out a reply.
"I hoped you wouldn't."
She merely sighed ever-gently, and stepped closer.
"No you didn't."
Joe sighed despairingly, a ragged half moan as he blinked back tears. Edging away, he stepped closer to the stream, bending down and dipping his fingers in the cool element.
"No...I didn't...I need this...You."
He cast up his arms, flicking glimmering droplets of water over his body.
"But I'll never really have you! I'll never be able to hold you in my arms and declare to the world how much you mean to me, or kiss you with ever bit of emotion I have! Because, Mimi, you don't belong to me!"
She joined him be the water, gracefully skimming the liquid with her small hands.
Her golden eyes were tearful and somber.
"Nobody has ever had me like you."
Her statement infuriated him, and he threw himself up and glared down at her small frame.
"No? I wonder sometimes Meems, do you talk to him the way you talk to me? Does your voice melt his heart like it does mine? Do you look at him with eyes like that? Do they fill with this inner light when you watch him?"
As he painfully voiced his nightmare, he gestures wildly with his hands, as if by gesticulating he would clarify his pain to her.
"Do you hold him like you do to me? Like you want to hold me well the world crashes down around us? Do-do you cry his name out when you make l-love? Do you make him cry because just by touching him, you've put him above the rest, and make him feel like nobody else could get as high as he is at that m-moment?"
Mimi watched the anguished young man in front of her, his torture mirrored within her soul.
"Joe...Oh Joe...Never. We both know that! Did you know, that even before we discovered this, US...I had to stifle YOUR name when we slept together? Did you know that I haven't made love to Matt ever since I belonged to you! And I do! Only you Joe! It's not just you who's in pain! I have to hide my love because of the his feeling, when I know that were just making it worse for all three of us!"
She broke down into great, wracking sobs, and Joe was immobolized for a moment.
Mimi felt the same way...She cried HIS name out...She was...
"I'm sorry Meems."
He cradled her to his broad chest, stroking her silky hair as she cried, kissing her temple as she mumbled his name.
"Why is it us, Mimi? Maybe we're not supposed to be this agonized, or this happy..."
Mimi drew back, desperate fear climbing through her eyes. "What are you saying Joe?"
He smiled gently at her, stroking her hair again in an effort to comfort them both. 'These are the moments we remember the rest of our life Meems,' He thought absently 'These precious, beautiful seconds that are so few, and so cherished.'

His large hands continued their path down her shoulders, down her back, relaxing her body with the movements. Ever so gently, he turned her tearful face to his and pressed his mouth to her sweet lips. She responded with gentle fervor, entangling her fingers within his blue hair, and setting his glasses askew, even as he cradled her face between his large palms, like it was a glass rose.
Their caresses continued, as he lay her down on the velvety grass beside the water.
She looked at him through a sheen of tears, despair causing his heart to ache as if he was dying.
"I love you Joe, so much...I won't let you go. I'll find a way back to you."
He silenced her with a tender kiss, his own crystal tears trickling down her porcelain skin.
She would not come back to him, he would not be there to come back to.
He wept, and she held him, as they made love for the final time. It was the most beautiful thing Joe had ever experienced, and he couldn't stop crying even when he fled the digital world.
He kissed her fiercly, wildly, as his bright, desperate eyes searched her treasured visage, memorizing every feature, every inch of perfection.
"I love you, dear God I love you...I love you, I love you. God...Be with me always Mimi..."
She cried just as hard, unable to read the emotions coursing through the only man she had ever loved, Joe Kido's eyes.
"I will Joe! We can! Please! Just don't do whatever you're planning! I can't live without you!"
He crushed her to him, burying his face in her neck, breathing in her smell, memorizing every contour and plane of her body and soul.
"I love you, I love you...Meems...You'll live..."
And then he was gone, through the portal, and she broke into anguished hysterical sobbing, clawing at the ground. Her digivice back at the glade.
"Joe! Joe! No! Joe! I love you! I love you! No! No..."
She clawed her way to her feet, and took off through the forest. The digivice wasn't to far. She had to find him before it was to late.

When she did find him, he was lying peacefully on his black leather couch, looking for all the world like a handsome, smart young man.
His glasses were immaculate, his clothing without wrinkles, he still wore the jeans and black shirt, his hair was mussed from their earlier love making. But tears still were wet agains her shaking fingers...Blood still warm to her skin.
The shiny silver revolver clutched within his limp grasp had her screaming and hysterical as he tried to wake him up, tried to kiss the sweet breath back into his beloved body.
"NO! NONONONONONONONO!"
She yanked on his shirt, unable to move the weight of his body, so curling onto his lap and shivering from shock.
Screaming and crying, she denied the truth even as her shaking fingers franticaly grabbed the revolver.
"You never understood Joe! I loved you so much! Without you...I'm already dead..."
Weeping gently, she leaned forward and kissed his lips, just like he had done an hour before.
Memories flooded through her mind and she brushed his azure hair from his restful face.
"I love you..."

The second shot that morning, rang through the building.


Matt found them Mimi collapsed upon Joe's form, curled peacfully within his oblivious embrace. Tears filled his own icy gaze.
"I-I didn't know..."
Sora wept uncontrollably, Ken comforted a hysterical Yolei as she gripped him tightly, Izzy called the police, and Kari cried on T.K's shoulder.

Cody said nothing, as he found a neatly scribed slip of paper upon the coffee table before the tragically beautiful figures, and brought it to Tai.

The brunette wiped tears from his own eyes, as he sadly read Joe's tidy, print.


Dear Mimi,
Don't despair, I loved you more then anything. I'll be watching over you, from heaven or hell, I don't care which, as long as your safe.
Remember how much I loved you, and forgive me. I couldn't handle not having you in my arms anymore. Matt will be good to you, he doesn't need to know about us, unless you want him to. I'm sitting here, my final spot, and I'm crying, and remembering. Do you remember the night in the rain? When I said 'I hate being a coward and a geek'
and you told me 'No Joe, you're handsome and giving !' and you smiled at me? I do, That was the moment I felt you really loved me. It's silly really, because that wasn't the most wonderful time we had. I remember the night on the beach, the first time we made love, and you cried and told me you loved me. My name on you're lips was the greatest moment in my life. Wherever I am, or I'll be, I'll remember that moment. I hope I gave you more then pain Meems, I didn't want to hurt you. You gave me so much...The life and love I dreamed of, the courage to face my feelings, the friendship to get over them, the knowledge to handle them, the hope to sustain them, the kindness to show them, the sincerity to believe them and the light to guide them. And the love, I can't get over that. The most beautiful thing I've ever experienced. Everything and anything beautiful in my life stemmed from you. I hope I gave you a little of that back, because all I ever wanted, from the moment I saw you way back at summer camp, to the last glimpse I had of you're tearstreaked face, was to make you happy.
The fact that I may have failed, is enough to destroy me.
Remember the way I love you. Even if you forget me, and the agony we went through to be together. Remember me, and the way I loved you

I'm so sorry,
Love forever,
Joseph Kido


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