DISCLAIMER: I do not own Resident Evil or "The Twelve Days of Christmas".

A/N: Just because I'm feeling festive. I hope you enjoy! (Everything in italics is the actions and comments by the various characters.)

--------------------------------------------------------

The entire Resident Evil cast is dressed in their best and ready to begin. The girls are wearing long red dresses with green holly in their hair and the boys are dressed in black tuxes with red bow ties and cumber buns. The group are standing on risers in front of a reproduction of the R.P.D. which is covered in Christmas decorations.

----

(Claire)

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me…A Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Wesker - currently tied to a pear tree with a big red ribbon)

"I'll get someone for this!! This is so wrong on so many levels you dirty ($()!!!"

----

(Steve)

On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Two Psycho Twins…

----

(Alfred and Alexia - wearing matching red Mrs. Klaus dresses, with big red bows in their hair. )

"Don't we look cute!?"

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Characters)

And…A Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Ada)

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Three Annoying Children…

----

(Lilly, Rott, and Sherry - also wearing big red bows.)

"Are we really that annoying??"

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Characters)

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Leon)

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

----

(Jill, Barry, Rebecca, and Chris - dressed in their S.T.A.R.S. uniforms. All of them are wearing little red bows on their heads.)

"I love Christmas!"

"I want a gun for Christmas!"

"I want Billy for Christmas!"

"Personally I'd like to have Jill for Christmas..."

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Memebers/Minor Characters)

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Annette)

On the Fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Five Golden Herbs…

----

A table is wheeled out. On top of the table is five plates containing the golden herbs, which everyone knows is what you get when you combine blue, red, and green herbs together.

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Memebers/Minor Characters)

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Birkin)

On the Sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Six Labs Exploding…

----

(Lab Computer - A green fluorescent timer has just popped up above the cast's heads.)

"The self-destruct sequence has been activated…"

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Memebers/Minor Characters)

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Marcus)

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Seven Zombies Squishing…

----

(Zombies - Wearing slightly bloody and somewhat soiled red bows)

"Argh…."

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Characters)

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Carlos)

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Eight Nemmys Stalking…

----

(Nemmys - Wearing a really big red bow)

"starrsss…"

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Memebers/Minor Characters)

Seven Zombies Squishing…

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Billy)

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Nine Lurkers Lurking…

----

(Lurkers - yea, with a red bow)

Just sorta hops around…

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Characters)

Eight Nemmys Stalking…

Seven Zombies Squishing…

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Bruce)

On the Tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Ten Lickers Clicking…

----

(Lickers - with bows and whipping their tongues about)

"Blah…."

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Chracters)

Nine Lurkers Lurking…

Eight Nemmys Stalking…

Seven Zombies Squishing…

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Morpheus)

On the Eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Eleven Neptunes Swimming…

----

(Neptunes - in a big aquarium with a red bow on it)

Umm…well…err…they're basically just swimming around and trying to break out of the aquarium.

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Characters)

Ten Lickers Clicking…

Nine Lurkers Lurking…

Eight Nemmys Stalking…

Seven Zombies Squishing…

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Fong)

On the Twelve day of Christmas my true love gave to me…Twelve Hunters Leaping…

----

(Hunters - with bows…leaping around)

High pitched screams…

----

(Outbreak Cast/Dead S.T.A.R.S. Members/Minor Chracters)

Eleven Neptunes Swimming…

Ten Lickers Clicking…

Nine Lurkers Lurking…

Eight Nemmys Stalking…

Seven Zombies Squishing…

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----

(Entire Cast)

Twelve Hunters Leaping…

Eleven Neptunes Swimming…

Ten Lickers Clicking…

Nine Lurkers Lurking…

Eight Nemmys Stalking…

Seven Zombies Squishing…

Six Labs Exploding…

Five Golden Herbs…

Four S.T.A.R.S. Survivors…

Three Annoying Children…

Two Psycho Twins…

And a Wesker tied to a pear tree…

----------------------

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!