One shot. Back to old school diary-format. Read and review. No more slacking in the review department, peeps.
Omijason, I just noticed something while going to put this up. There is now a 1800-Where-R-You section. Aahhh! I heart those books almost as much as PD. And since I was a little disappointed in ol' Mikey in the sixth book, Mr. Rob Wilkens has totally snuck up on my hot-fiction-book-guys radar. Mmm, I'm so thinking of jumping ship to that section now. Sorry if that was old news, but I haven't been here in forever. And I'm totally excited. I'm off to write 1800 stuff now! Hurrah!
Anyway, on with this story.
Disclaimer: Meg Cabot owns all characters.
Saturday, May 6th 2:02am
My birthday is officially over. I'm fifteen. Finally. And I can already tell that being fifteen is going to mean some big changes around here. More responsibility or whatever. The first thing I noticed is that when I pitched the idea of a boy/girl sleepover to mom, she actually said yes. My mother, said yes. To boys and girls being squished up in sleeping bags in the same room.
Although, of course, I'm still in my room. By myself. Mom made the excuse that there wasn't enough room for everyone to be in the den, so she said I may as well sleep in my own room. It's like she thinks everyone out there is participating in one giant orgy, and although she doesn't mind it happening, since she let them all stay over, she just doesn't want me to be a part of it.
As Lana would say, puh-lease.
But anyway, Tina, Lilly, Shameeka, Ling-Su, Boris, Kenny and…Michael are all out there. I still can't believe Michael said yes to coming. I only asked him because Tina said that I needed more boys, and I couldn't think of anyone else.
But I shouldn't be thinking of Michael. I mean, it's not like he's my boyfriend. No, Kenny is my boyfriend. Kenny should be the reason I can't sleep, simply because he's just a few rooms away. And it's not like I've never been in this situation with Michael before. Whenever I stay over at Lilly's he's always just on the other side of the wall. I guess it's just different because now it's my apartment. My territory.
I wonder what they're all doing out there. We stayed up until about 12:30 talking, and then mom came out and said that we had to 'retire to slumber.' I bet they're all out there talking still.
I bet they're talking about me!
Calm down, why would they be talking about you? It's your birthday, surely they wouldn't bitch about the birthday girl…would they? No. They're my friends. They wouldn't be here if they were the type of people to bitch behind my back. It's not as if I invited Lana! Not that she would come to my, in her words, 'lame ass' party in the first place. When she heard I was having one she made a joke in front of the whole class, that I was finally growing up, but that I was still light years behind her.
She still gives me grief about Kenny too. Just because I turn my head when I see him coming towards me with his huge, slobbery lips. Why should I have to kiss him if I don't want to? Just because we've been going out for…seven months, it doesn't mean he can invade my mouth with his.
I really need to break up with him. It's wrong that I don't want him to kiss me. And it's unfair of me to drag him into my misery. Especially when I wouldn't mind certain other people invading my mouth with theirs…
Not that Michael Moscovitz would ever dream of mashing his mouth with mine. No, that kind of thing only happens in my sad, pathetic dreams. And that gorgeous dream catcher he brought me for my birthday was probably just his way of saying that only in my dreams can I have him. Not that I need the reminder. But it was still the best present I got, even if it was only for the fact that HE gave it to me. I mean, he could have given me a cheeseburger, and I would have cherished it above all my other gifts. That's how sad I am.
Oh, all this worry about boys and what my friends are talking about out there is making me stress, and stress always puts pressure on my bladder as well as not letting me sleep. Maybe if I sneak out, I can see if they're all asleep or still up talking.
Saturday, May 6th 2:57am
So, it turns out people were talking about me. Only it wasn't bitching behind my back like I first thought.
I'd carefully opened my bedroom door and stepped out into the hall. But I didn't make it very far before tripping over the large object in my doorway. I fell with a bang on the wooden floor.
"Ow!" I cried, clutching my legs into a ball position and looking suspiciously at the unidentified object in front of my door.
From somewhere deep inside the mound, it spoke. "Thermopolis?"
"Michael? What the hell are you doing?" I whispered urgently. "You scared me!"
A dishevelled head emerged from the covers of the sleeping bag. In the light pouring out from my Mickey Mouse night light, he still looks cute. Even with his bed head and sleepy expression.
"Well, you almost killed me. What are you doing out here?"
"I'm going to the bathroom. What are you doing out here?"In the dim light I could see him go red and slightly flustered. "Oh…um…Kenny was talking about you earlier. And um, he was saying how he wanted to come in and surprise you with a midnight make out session. And I didn't think that was right…I mean, you'd be surprised and probably not welcome to the idea, so I thought I'd station myself out here and he wouldn't be able to come in."
I was horrified. How could Kenny think about something like that? Did he actually think I'd be welcome to the idea, like Michael said? Hell no.
"Oh my God. What an asshole."
Michael smiled. "I thought you'd think of it like that. That's why I'm here."
I smiled back, suddenly thinking of something. "So you're protecting my innocence from my lustful boyfriend?"
He looked down. "Well…when you put it like that it sounds stupid. But yeah. I never liked that Showalter kid in the first place, and I don't want him pushing you into anything you don't want to do."
"Thanks, Michael. I really appreciate it. Sometimes Kenny can be a handful."
Then I stood up and stumbled into the bathroom. Checking first that Kenny and everyone else were sleeping. There's no noise coming from them, so either they are, or they're just pretending.
Then I walked back to the hall. Michael had already snuggled back into his sleeping bag, so I stepped over him carefully and walked into my room. Which is where I am now. Wondering if it was all real.
Was Michael really outside my door protecting me from Kenny? Or is that just the work of my over-tired mind, telling me what I want to see?
Saturday, May 6tb 4:21am
Okay, so I cracked and went back outside to see if it really was my mind playing tricks on me. I mean, why would Michael Moscovitz want to protect me from Kenny? Why would he even care about Kenny's evil plans?
Because he's valiant, nice, dependable, trustworthy, and perfect. That's why. But it's not because he likes me. Right?
So anyway, I carefully opened the door and looked down, hoping to see a lump that would tell me it wasn't my imagination. That Michael really was protecting me from Kenny.
But there was nothing there. No sleeping bag, no Michael, no valiant protector, no knight in shining armour, nothing.
I let out the breath I hadn't even realised I'd been holding and sighed.
Jesus Christ. He scares me again. I looked down the hall to see him shuffling down in his sleeping bag. Baby step by baby step. It's possibly the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life.
"Jesus, Michael. What are you doing?"
"What am I doing? I took a two-minute break to use the bathroom. But don't worry, I checked to see Kenny was still sleeping peacefully. And he is. He's knocked out like a light and snoring happily. What are you doing out here? Need to pee again?"
I blushed. Sure I'd told him I needed the bathroom before, but I'd never use the word 'pee'. How embarrassing!
"Um, no. It's nothing. Night."
Then I quickly shut the door as he settled down against it.
So it wasn't part of my imagination. He really is out there. Protecting me. I guess he's trying to let me sleep peacefully, with the knowledge that Kenny can't come in with him there. But to be honest, knowing he's out there isn't helping me sleep any better.
Wait, what's that noise out in the hallway? It sounds like a struggle. And now the door's opening!
Kenny beat Michael up and is coming after me!!!
Saturday, May 6th 5:07am
There goes my over active imagination again. Because of course it wasn't Kenny coming for a midnight (or 4.30am) make out session. It was Michael who stumbled through my door.
I clutched the covers to me, squinting in the dim light. "Michael? Now what are you doing?"
"Yeah, it's me," he said. "I just want to talk."
"Um, okay." I smoothed the covers at the end of my bed over and he sat down. Still in his sleeping bag.
"What was that thump out there?" I asked him. "I thought Kenny had tried to beat you out of the way."
He laughed. "No. That was just me falling back down to the ground as I tried to stand up. Stupid bag is slippery on the wooden floors."
"Oh…so what did you want to talk about?"
"Well, I can't sleep. And I knew you were still awake. So I just thought I'd come in and talk about the thing that's keeping me awake." He brushed a lock of hair that was sticking out the side of his head back. But it sprang right back. I wanted to smooth it down for him.
"Oh? And what's that?" What could possibly be keeping Michael Moscovitz awake all night?
"Well…you and Kenny…"
"Me and Kenny are keeping you awake all night? Michael, if you don't want to stand guard at my door, you don't have to. Go back and sleep on the couch. I'm sure it's more comfortable there, you'll be asleep in no time."
"No, it's not that," he said, his eyes not meeting mine, but choosing to fix themselves on my Mickey Mouse night light instead.
"Well, you don't seem to like him all that much. In fact, you seem to like him less than I do. So I just don't get why you are still with him."
Michael Moscovitz can't sleep at night because I don't like my boyfriend.
I looked out the window, but because it's still night, the curtains are shut, so there was nothing to see. "I can't break up with him," I told him. "I just can't."
"Why not? If you really don't want to be with him, then you shouldn't be. You should be with someone you want to be with."
"Yeah," I faked a small laugh. "Well the chances of that happening are not the greatest. So meanwhile, I'm stuck with Kenny."
Michael sighed. "Well you shouldn't be. It's not fair to you to be with someone you don't want to be with, and it's not fair to Kenny to be with someone he thinks likes him a hell of a lot more than she does."
"And…" Michael continued. "It's not fair to the rest of the population who want to be with you but can't be because you're with him."
Who is he talking about?
"Michael, like I said, the chances of me being with someone I actually like is not the greatest."
"But they're not impossible, Mia. You should go for what you want. And you should never settle for something just because you think you can't get any better. Especially when what you're settling for is someone you don't like."
I nodded. I got what he was trying to say, although I don't know if I can take the advice. I mean, breaking up with Kenny is something I've been trying to do since we first got together. But something always comes up. Plus, it doesn't help that I'm chicken shit.
Michael sighed and patted the doona, where he supposed my knee was. "When you finally get the balls to do it, come find me." Then he stood up to shuffle out the door again.
What does that mean?
So I asked him.
He turned around, still clutching the sleeping bag to his chest. "If you don't get it by now, Thermopolis, you never will." Then he left, leaving me to ponder.
WHAT DID HE MEAN???
I know what I want to think it meant. But the chances that Michael slept protectively at my door, and said all those things about being with someone I actually like, as a way of telling me he actually likes me, are absurd, aren't they?
Or am I just being naive and slow? He has been tutoring me in G&T for months now, even though he has better things to do with his time. And he is constantly walking around his apartment shirtless, and Lilly says that he only ever does that on Friday nights. Friday nights are when I stay over.
Is this all his way of telling me he likes me?
Well, there's only one way to find out. I'm going to have to go out there and ask him myself…If I can drum up the courage to ask someone something like that.
Saturday, May 6th 6:09am
I carefully opened the door, half hoping that Michael wouldn't even be there, so I could avoid this on all counts. But he was. He stirred when he saw the light from the door and rolled over, so he was facing up at me from the floor.
"Thermopolis," he said simply. "What can I do for you?"
I knelt down in the doorway and took a deep breath. "Um, I just want clarification."
"Clarification," he repeated, sitting himself up against the other side of the wall.
"Yeah, you see…I have an idea of why you said all those things you said, but I just need to know whether or not it's my over-tired brain, or whether I'm right."
He nodded sleepily and stifled a yawn. "Right. So what's your theory?"
He wants me to spell it out for him?
"Um…" How do I tell him? What if I'm wrong and he laughs at me? "…that you maybe, like, wanna be with me?"
All the blood in my entire body rushed to my head. If he was going to break my heart, he'd also be putting me in a coma.
But he smiled and half laughed. I readied myself for humiliation, unable to determine whether his reaction was good or bad.
"Thermopolis, you couldn't be more right."
OH MY GOD.
I didn't move. I couldn't move. Not until my legs gave way from underneath me and I crashed to the floor.
"Are you okay?" he asked, leaning towards me and grabbing my arm.
"Uh huh," I mumbled, unable to look him in the eye, concentrating my gaze on the chips in the wooden floor.
"So, now you know how I feel…how do you feel?"
"Well…I'm going to have to break up with Kenny," I said, realising it myself and feeling worse than I already did because I just found out Michael likes me.
"Because…you want to be with me?" he asked hopefully.
Right before he leaned forwards and kissed me, he said, "You know, I never thought insomnia could actually lead to something good."
I think I muttered an agreement before he invaded my mouth with his. And this time, I didn't mind the invasion.
And now I think I can get a few hours sleep because of it. Just so long as Kenny doesn't come into my room to kiss me good morning or anything. Although with Michael sleeping outside my door still, I don't think he'd even try it.
As I said, no more chapters for this story. But I hope you liked nonetheless.