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Last Updated: 9/2/14

BAD SCIENCE
By: Angela Jewell

Disclaimer: I do not own Jimmy Neutron (though I certainly wish I did) so please don't sue me.

Also, I apologize in advance for the technical/pseudo-science mumbo-jumbo in this story. I know next to NOTHING about science, so I basically put large words together, and prayed it didn't sound too stupid. And if it does, please just ignore it. Despite the title, science really isn't the main focus in this story, Jimmy and Cindy are. Kinda. ;)

And remember: read and review!


He watched her nervously, his heart pounding at an alarming rate per second, despite his best efforts to control it. Cindy was lying completely still, her eyes tightly closed and her expression lax. Her face looked different—peaceful even, which he knew was a trick of the light—and her blonde hair fell down over her shoulders, loose from her ponytail. Taking a deep breath, he tore his eyes away.

He had to kiss Cindy?

Puking Pluto, please let it be a mistake. . .

Jimmy turned to glare accusingly at Sheen, the cause of all this trouble.

Sheen, for his part, seemed completely oblivious. He was rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, whistling. Standing behind him, Carl shook his head in a regretful manner and Libby crossed her arms, just as Jimmy took a threatening step towards their hyper-active friend.

"Um . . . Sheen," Carl said, poking him lightly. "I think Jimmy's mad at you."

"Huh? Why?" Sheen opened his eyes to see his big-headed, funny-haired pal standing angrily before him. "Hey there, Jimmy!" he said brightly, hoping to cheer his good friend up. "Beautiful weather we're having, isn't it?"

Jimmy ignored the comment, and forced himself to breath deeply, lest he strangle his soon to be ex-friend. After all this time, he was seriously beginning to wonder if he'd underestimated the security measures he'd taken with Vox. "How did you guys get in here?" he demanded, looking at them all in turn.

Silently, Carl held up a brown paper bag filled with hair, the same one they'd used when the Twonkies had attacked. Jimmy groaned; he knew he should have taken it away from them. "Okay, stupid question," he replied grudgingly. "Now, allow me to ask a better one: What are you guys doing here?"

"Ooh, ooh! I know, I know!" said Carl eagerly.

Jimmy put a hand to his head and sighed. "Go ahead, Carl."

The plump Weezer boy smiled gratefully. "Well," he explained, suddenly feeling important. "You see, we sorta, kinda . . . um . . ." Carl paused uncertainly, and squinting his eyes, began to look around the room in confusion. "Why did we come here again, Sheen?" he asked at last.

"Beats me," the Mexican boy shrugged, having honestly forgotten.

Jimmy turned towards Libby, who put her hands up defensively. "Hey, don't look at me," she said. "They promised us cake."

"Chocolate cake," Carl added proudly, happy to be helpful. He never forgot food.

Jimmy sighed, having realized he wasn't going to get any straight answers now, or possibly ever. "I guess that's not important," he relented, partially because he had no choice. "But what IS important, is how exactly this managed to happen?" Jimmy motioned towards his lab table, where Cindy remained unmoving, fast asleep. "Care to explain?"

"Well," Carl began thoughtfully. "Sheen did hit Cindy with your sleepatron-thingy, Jimmy. Maybe that has something to do with it. . ."

The boy genius groaned. "I knew it," he said unhappily. "The computer readings, her sleep-like state," he glared in Sheen's direction, "my Somnus 2000, broken on the floor." Sheen smiled innocently as he began once again to whistle. "All the data pointed to that outcome—I had just hoped it was something else."

Libby looked at him in confusion. "Then what's the bid deal?" she asked. "Lots of your inventions go wrong, can't you just fix it?"

"Yeah, Jimmy," Sheen said, grabbing a cool-looking invention off Jimmy's table. "Just press the undo button or something." Making rumbling sounds, Sheen began to race the egg shaped instrument through the air.

"No, I can't just undo it!" Jimmy complained. "I told you it was only a prototype, Sheen. I still have a lot of bugs to work out—it wasn't ready to be tested yet!"

"But it was so shiny," Sheen argued. "It would've looked awesome in my new life-sized Ultra Man's utility belt!" Sheen gestured proudly to the large "action figure" that stood behind him, the helmet gleaming where the fictional superhero stood. "Isn't he cool?"

"Please don't tell me you—"

Sheen frowned. "Oh," he complained, his hands moving in wild, chaotic circles. "And I suppose you're going to say that it's "my" fault your dumb invention wouldn't fit, and just "happened" to go off and hit Cindy?!"

At that moment, the instrument Sheen was holding suddenly emitted a strange red light that exploded from it's coiled wires, shooting across the room where it narrowly missed Carl's massive head. Laughing nervously, Sheen quickly placed the instrument back on the table, putting his hands in the air, as he slowly backed away.

"But Sheen," Carl said in a small, whiny voice. "Jim's sleepy-tron-thingy did go off like you said."

Sheen looked thoughtful for a moment. "Oh yeah," he replied with a laugh. "So it did."

Libby shook her head as she turned to look at Jimmy. "So you're saying Cindy's stuck like that?" she demanded, her hands on her hips. "Ooh, you best be jokin'."

Carl sashayed his hips. "You tell him, girlfriend."

Jimmy swallowed the lump in his throat and frowned. "Well, there is a way," he said uneasily, turning aside so he wouldn't have to meet their curious gazes. "But I warn you now . . . it's not pretty."

Libby scoffed as she waved a hand in dismissal. "Like we haven't heard that one before," she reminded him. "So, what do you gotta do? Feed her something disgustin'? Clip her toenails? What?"

"Ooh, ooh! Does it have anything to do with petting a baby llama?"

"Don't be stupid, Carl," Sheen berated. "I bet he has to fight a dragon and steal its horn while wearing a dress!" At the visual image, Sheen doubled over laughing. "That would be hilarious!"

"Don't be ridiculous," Jimmy said. "I just—I mean, someone just has too—um . . . kiss . . . her." He could feel the blush as it quickly spread over his face.

Libby stared at him in disbelief. "You serious?" she asked.

Jimmy nodded. "I wish that I wasn't," he told her sincerely.

An uncomfortable silence fell over the room. Everyone turned to look at Cindy who was lying comfortably (and thankfully for Jimmy) obliviously on the table.

The sound of Sheen's laughter broke the silence several minutes later. "Ha Ha! Great going, Jimmy!" he said, patting his friend on the back. "It's not every day you make such an awesomely cool invention!" Sheen rolled up his sleeves with determination as he turned to face Libby. "Please," he said, taking a hold of her hands, suddenly serious. "Do not weep. Once I wake Cindy, we can zap you and you can have your turn. Now," he said as he started walking towards the prone blonde. "Let's get this show on the road!"

"I don't think so," said Libby, grabbing a hold of his shirt. Sheen whined as he felt himself pulled back.

"Hey," he complained, "let go!"

Libby ignored him as she turned to look at Jimmy. "Go ahead, genius boy," she said, smiling. "Wake her up."

Jimmy backed away, his hands in the air. "Oh no," he said quickly, shaking his head. "There's no way I'm kissing her. She'd kill me!"

"I'll do it!" Sheen said, waving his hand in the air. Libby's grip on his shirt tightened, and he felt himself go short on oxygen. "On . . . on the other hand . . . Jimmy," he said between gasps. "I think . . . you . . . should do it."

Carl meekly raised his hand. "Umm . . . I—I'll do it," he stuttered, though his offer was drowned out by the sounds of their arguing.

"Why me?" Jimmy was demanding as he faced off against Libby and Sheen.

"Because," Libby said, rolling her eyes. "It's your stupid invention. What were you thinking anyway—'she has to be kissed'? Is that some stupid guy thing?"

Carl took a smaller step towards them. "Hey guys," he repeated timidly. "I, I said I'd do it." His offer, sadly, continued to go unheard.

"Hey!" said Jimmy defensively. "It was not a stupid idea! The fairytale modular was only temporary—I was going to recalibrate the settings and then replace it with a noise synthesizer! It's not my fault all of your stupid girly fairytales end with some dumb kiss!"

"Oh that's it!" Libby yelled. "Hold me back Sheen, or I'm going for his big head!"

"Uh, Jimmy," Sheen said, holding tightly to Libby's waist. "Run."

Suddenly Carl's voice exploded throughout the room. "I SAID I'D DO IT!" he screamed.

Three heads turned in unison, surprised to see Carl breathing heavily, his hands curled into fists before him.

"Wow, Carl," said Sheen, letting go of Libby. "I'm impressed."

Carl blushed as he kicked at the ground, embarrassed. "It was nothin'," he said shyly.

"You don't have to do that, Carl," Jimmy said, sighing. "After all, it was my experiment. You shouldn't be punished for it." Carl's face fell.

"Jimmy's right," Libby interrupted. "It's his mess; he should fix it. So come on," she said, turning to glare at the young genius. "Go on and kiss her already."

Jimmy was blushing furiously now. "Okay, okay," he said as he walked towards Cindy. For some reason he couldn't quite fathom, the thought of Carl or Sheen kissing her upset him much more than he cared to admit.

But despite this, Libby couldn't help but notice just how slowly he was walking. . .

Taking a slow, deep breath, Jimmy approached the table. I can do this, I can do this—he repeated the words over and over again, like a silent mantra; a silent mantra that didn't help much. It's just Cindy, he told himself. Just your part-time rival, semi-friend. Nothing to be nervous about.

She was lying in the exact same position, her hair, for some reason, down. He wondered briefly what made her want to release it from her familiar ponytail, but in the end gave up. He had learned long ago that the one enigma he could never hope to unravel was the mystery of girls.

As he stared at her, trying to gather his courage, he couldn't help but notice just how pretty she looked. She had always been attractive—he couldn't deny that fact—but now, here, it was in a noticeably different way. For once, her expression looked peaceful . . . and well . . . gentle. It was rare for him to see her like this; her guard completely down.

Of course there had been times when she wasn't hitting, kicking, or teasing him, but those occasions were infrequent, at best. And although he'd never admit it, he kind of, sort of . . . liked her when she was being nice. Not that he'd ever tell her that!

But to have to kiss her?!

"Hurry up, Jimmy!" Libby shouted impatiently. "We don't have all day!"

"Yeah! Come on!" Sheen yelled. "Just pucker up and lay one on her."

Jimmy blushed as he suddenly realized the path his thoughts had been taking, and turning, glared at them. "Leave me alone," he shot back. "This isn't easy you know!"

Carl stood morosely by himself, too embarrassed to offer his services again.

"Come on, Sheen," Libby said as a grin slowly spread across her face. "Let's give Jimmy a hand."

Sheen smiled back at her. "Anything to help a friend," he said, laughing maniacally. Then the two were slowly advancing towards him.

"Uh, come on you guys," he said nervously, not liking the look in their eyes one bit. "Let's talk about this like scientific equals and mature—" His words were cut off as he suddenly felt himself pushed forward.

Jimmy cried out as he found himself fighting a losing battle against gravity. All he could do to keep himself from falling on Cindy was to brace himself against the table with both of his hands. Buckling against the added weight, Jimmy lost. . .

. . .And that's when he felt it; soft, warm lips against his. It lasted only a moment—a second, really—and then he watched, horrified, as Cindy slowly opened her eyes.

He scrambled back as quickly as he could, knocking Sheen and Libby over in the process.

"Neu—Neutron?" Cindy sat up, looking confused. "What were you just doing?" Although she meant the words to sound angry and harsh, she was too groggy and confused to put any real conviction behind them.

"Don't say a word," Jimmy hissed to the two people sprawled beside him. Laughing uneasily, he sat up. "Uh, hey there, Cindy," he said, forcing a smile. "You were, just, uh . . . sleeping. We've all been waiting very patiently for you wake up."

Cindy didn't look very convinced.

"But Jimmy," Carl said from across the room. "I thought you had to kiss her? Did your sleepy-thingy wear off or something?"

Jimmy groaned as he put a hand to his head in exasperation, and seeing the look of outrage on Cindy's face, smiled uncomfortably. "Heh, heh. Surprise?"

All hell broke loose seconds later.


Cindy and Libby walked home, talking amicably. Well, to be more precise, Libby was talking—Cindy was grudgingly listening.

"And then Carl volunteered. But me and Jimmy quickly put an end to that," she said with a laugh. "Ooh, but you should have seen the look on Carl's face: oh boy, did he look devastated! But don't worry," she added quickly, winking. "He'll get over his disappointment soon enough—just as soon as he sees Jimmy's mom again."

"Ewwww!" Both girls shuddered at the thought.

"But it's too bad you were asleep for most of it," Libby continued. "It was almost better than listening to Dirty D and the Rhythm Bucket's latest single!"

Cindy made a face. "No thanks," she said. "The last thing I'd wanna see is Nerdtron, Ultra Loser, and Llama Freak fighting over who gets to kiss me. Now, throw Nick into the equation. . ." she trailed off dreamily.

Libby smiled knowingly. "I don't know," she replied. "You should have seen Jimmy. He suuure was looking at you a long time. . ."

Cindy forced back a blush. "N—Nerdtron? No way. He was probably just stalling as he tried to think of a way out of it." She remembered all too vividly the few times they'd come close to kissing before. . .

Libby shrugged. "Suit yourself, girl. All I know, is that you certainly don't seem too upset with the fact that Jimmy kissed you."

Cindy laughed. "Not upset? I tore his lab apart and left him in a crumpled heap."

"A crumpled heap?" Libby smirked. "Well, you did make a mess of his inventions . . . he was crawling around on the ground, trying to find the pieces you threw."

Cindy blushed. "Well, I'll—I'll hit him next time," she promised, smacking her hand into her fist for emphasis.

Her friend raised an eyebrow. "Next time?" she asked.

"Libby!"

Finally reaching the large pink house, the girls disappeared inside. The only thing remaining, were the sounds of, "Libby! Stop laughing!"

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THE END
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