Disclaimer-I am not the brilliant Eoin Colfer.

Yes, I know perfectly well that I am insane, starting yet another fic, I had to murder The Halloween Ball to manage to juggle all the other stories I started. But I really like this idea…be good…don't steal it…

Chapter 1- He clones himself.

"Butler! Is everything ready?" Artemis Fowl II called. "Everything in my lab must be absolutely perfect if this is to succeed at all!"

"Really, Artemis, I don't see why all this is necessary. Your project will be perfectly fine without all this fuss," Juliet told him.

"Mother says I should try to act my age. This is one case where I will allow myself a moment of childishness," Artemis replied.

"It's ready!" a shout could be heard from the lab that Angeline Fowl had agreed to have constructed for her son. Artemis and Juliet proceeded to lab. They looked in.

"Artemis, are you sure that this is entirely safe? I don't mean just your, um, moment of childishness, I mean the actual cloning process. Are you absolutely positive that you won't harm yourself?" Butler looked as if they were all standing just outside a very black, gloomy, dark house surrounded by a legion of thorn-bushes, about to go in.

"Butler, I am the youngest mastermind to ever walk this planet or what? It's not like I haven't gone on other crazy, insane adventures before. I'll be perfectly fine," Artemis said.

"Couldn't you at least use me as your test subject? Madame Ko would be most displeased when she finds out about this," Butler replied.

"No, Butler. I cannot let anyone else take the risk, should it go wrong. And I'm not saying it will. I even had Foaly look the whole thing over, and he says there's no reason why it shouldn't work.

"Still, we'd feel a lot better if he was actually here, overseeing this," Juliet said.

"Well, in a way, he will be," Artemis said as he set up what looked like a mirror with lots of different buttons at the edges. He pressed one of them, and Foaly's head filled the screen. They could see Holly and a very disgruntled-looking Opal Koboi in the background.

"Mud boy, it's best if you just get on with it. Better not to think about it when you embark on a most perilous journey," Foaly greeted them.

"For the last time, this is perfectly safe. You should know, both you and Koboi there looked the whole thing over. Now, let's just do this," Artemis was beginning to get seriously impatient now. Butler sighed and flicked a switch on the wall. The lab was immediately filled with eerie lights and weak imitations of lightning. Brightly colored liquids began to bubble.

"Oh, boy," Holly muttered at this little scene. Artemis, at that moment let out an evil cackle most unlike his usual voice. Then, he slowly walked into a contraption that looked like a mini-elevator. The special effects died down, and the lab was relatively calm again.

Juliet and Butler took their places, and started pushing various buttons and connecting various wires. Then, the whole group, both in Fowl Manor and in the Ops Booth of Police Plaza held their breath. They waited for several long, dragging, agonizing minutes. Then the mini-elevator thing started to whirr, and odd noises began to sound. Then, it stopped.

"Come on boys, your clothes are all laid out for you here. Done? Well, open this thing!" Artemis's voice was filled with hardly restrained glee. The door opened, and not one, but five Artemises stepped out. All bore huge grins that were so rarely seen on his (their) face(s).

"Oh, my gosh! YOU DID IT!" Juliet screamed. Butler clapped the lead Artemis on the back saying, "Congratulations, Artemis."

"D'Arvit!" Opal could be heard muttering. No doubt she was not pleased at the fact that a mere human, and a child at that, had beaten her to anything. Foaly and Holly were both nearly dancing in delight despite themselves, and the Artemises were still grinning like idiots, well, actually, geniuses.