BLEED WITH ME
Two lovers re-united in the most sadistic of ways…
The substance which is craved, the need which shall be condemned…
Let's get all the boring stuff out of the way shall we? Okay so I know its been like forever. Yes I, as most fanfic writers lost my interest at some stage. However I always see to it that I finish what I start. I have no inspiration for this story, I have no idea where it is headed but I will continue anyway. I will be finishing off my stories one by one and this is my chosen first as it is the shortest. Although I can't promise the updates will be regular, I will do my best. Encouragement from my audience will always do well!
Well this chapter probably isn't worth the wait but I hope you enjoy it anyway, Happy Reading everyone!
Chapter Three: Acceptance
I drew my hands around my knees, touching the skin that now felt as cold and as dead as this night. I could cry if I wanted to but there were no more tears to cry anymore. I had already cried so hard my shirt had been wet and I no longer saw the point of crying. What good would it do me now?
I had been turned into a monster, a lifeless object that craved blood. How long would I sit here acknowledging this fact, tracing patterns on the ground? The ground's texture was new to me, a sensation I had never felt before.
How did Tidus expect this of me? My Rikku, Gippal, and Paine. As well as many others I had come across in my journeys, people whom I had come to trust and who had put their utmost trust within me, their high summoner, and the one who had defeated Sin. There was no way I could cut them off from their life, not even for him, my Tidus.
Looking back on this time and place I was so confused. Tidus had taken my life, yet he had given me a new one also, a life that perhaps I should have been grateful for since before I had stumbled across him, I had felt dead within. I couldn't stay angry at him no matter how I longed to. I was finally with him, it was what I had dreamed and prayed for. I had gotten my wish of course… but this wasn't what I had hoped for. Who wanted to hear the news Tidus had to give? I was confused, in love, thirsty and so apathetic towards it all.
After Tidus had told me of the news there was a moment's pause. I felt the blood I had taken from Tidus slowly lose its fire. My head was beginning to think something along the lines of my old self again. My old self despised blood; it was even scared of it. My old self loved Tidus, a Tidus that wouldn't ask me to do something like this, a Tidus that never would have drained me dry, a different Tidus. How long had he been with these people he seemed to describe as a higher race? Were they his friends? These people who snatched me in the middle of the night and brought me to a starving fiend that was barely human?
I wanted to tell myself to shut up, I shouldn't have these thoughts.
I punished myself… I had enjoyed the taste of blood, I had lusted for more. What was happening to my body? Why did I feel like a completely different person? I had questions and I needed answers… but I couldn't go to him now. Not after telling him to leave me in peace. I couldn't find the strength to look at him after he had told me what the whole kidnapping had been about. If he really wanted to keep me safe from these monsters who liked to see themselves as higher beings, he could have found me. He could have warned me.
Where was he anyway? I wouldn't ever know where he went to in times like those… Was he outside the bedroom door listening to my heart beat faster every second? Could he feel the pain that ran through my body? The turmoil running through my head? Or was he even reading my thoughts? Would there ever be any privacy, would I ever be safe?
"Rikku…" I whispered to myself. Her name didn't mean much to me at first… just something that rolled off my tongue. Yes, I was concerned for her but I was weak and I couldn't process what my mind was probing my legs to do. Was it to stand? Or perhaps to run? Far away. Somehow no matter how I felt betrayed… or how much I thought the man I had grown to know and love, the man who had saved me was no longer himself. My sense of loyalty still remained… it seemed stronger than ever. Like parting with Tidus now would cause the death of me. Was it in blood that I had made this contract? Or was it just my undying attachment to him. The promise I made to myself somewhere along the lines to stay with him no matter what the betrayal, hurt or pain.
I sighed, knowing that my anger with Tidus would not last forever. I had been caught up in the moment when I slapped him away from me. I couldn't believe my ears, no matter how keen the sense had grown; I still could not believe I had heard the words come from his mouth.
"We must annihilate Rikku, for the wellbeing of the entire Toreador."
She was the leader after all wasn't she Tidus?
My legs had failed me, but my hands seemed to have a great sense of their duty, slapping Tidus smack bang across the face with a new found strength I had inside of me.
"Get out." I had shouted, and this wasn't even my room, my house, my estate, my world. But Tidus turned towards me in a second, puffing his face up with anger at himself. "Leave!" I repeated. He had seen the tears brim in my eyes and sighed before closing the door behind him with parting words that pounded in my head.
"Okay Yuna, we will do this your way. But remember… sooner or later you are going to have to feed. You cannot hide from the clan forever, we both need them now. We obey, or we thirst to death."
With that, the door was slammed shut with a thud that echoed in my head. The thud was now becoming a steady pulsating throughout my body as I felt the thirst rise. I had been sitting here in my own pathetic sadness, wallowing over nothing. My body was starting to crave what I had tasted before. I hadn't fed enough for someone who had lost so much blood… Tidus had given me the luxury of all this information. Information I was too heartbroken to hear. But now here in this empty room it made perfect sense. It was becoming more important as the minutes ticked by. The sounds of the gears inside the clock were sending me insane. I could hear everything, see things I hadn't seen before, and smell the different scents of human blood which I needed, yet it was that same need I condemned. Could I really have been stubborn forever? How long was it till my pride dwindled? All I know was, the information my brain was trying to process was foreign and strange. I didn't have enough energy to deal with it…
Quicker than I thought my hands were pressed over my ears, trying to block out the never ending sounds. Arrghh! What was I supposed to do? I needed guidance? I needed help. I knew I was a creature of the night but more than ever I needed to be held. I needed someone to tell me I would be okay.
The floor, the bed, the curtains, why were they all laughing at me? Like everything had eyes I had never noticed before. Everything wanted to bring me down and I had nowhere to turn without admitting defeat and submitting to the clan who believed they owned me.
They didn't own me! Tidus didn't own me! He wasn't my master! He wasn't going to command me! I wasn't going to kill Rikku! No matter what I wasn't going to give in.
The questions swirled and swirled again before my head came to a complete stop and my heart froze. He was behind me…
I turned abruptly and my eyes grew wide as they fell upon the shadowy figure of Tidus.
"How did you get in?" I gasped, remembering the dirty state of my face. Tears had spilt and makeup had probably run, however he didn't seem to care. Why did I even care? I would have looked like a wreck even if my make-up was perfectly intact.
"It wasn't hard Yuna; you have been holding your head in distress for almost half an hour. I had to make sure you were okay…"
"I don't need help Tidus!" I turned and folded my arms. I know to this day that he knew what was making me upset. Asking me to kill my cousin ring any bells Tidus?
"I know you're angry but Yuna you have to look after yourself…"
"Oh like the way you looked after me in that dark empty prison cell?"
"Geez I don't remember you being this snappy."
I turned with a sharp look of anger on my face and stood, once again I didn't believe he had crossed the boundaries. Did he know when to stop? "Well yeah! I don't remember you sucking me dry then telling me to go kill my cousin either."
"The situation is different…"
"Yes it is!"
He sighed and bowed his head; it was a circular argument no matter how it went. Did he expect me to be docile Yuna after fighting with the Gullwings and then being turned into something inhuman, something that needed other innocent people's blood to live? I didn't want to live that way…
"I know what you're thinking Yuna,"
"Oh so you can read my thoughts also? Any other invasions of privacy I need to know about Tidus?"
He fell silent, and my hand that rested stubbornly on my hip fell to my thigh as my chest tightened with an intense pain I had never felt before. The ache hurled me forward onto the bed, which I was glad for. I instantly clenched my chest in anguish. What was happening?
"You're body is getting used to living off blood, that's all Yuna it will pass. It will pass quicker if you feed."
I heard his words but didn't understand them because everything was a blur.
"We all go through it, I experienced the same thing."
I tried to open my eyes, but when I did the world just became a distortion of all colours. Were they laughing right now? Knowing that I would have to succumb to them and be taught the ways of the clan? That I would have to join them for meal time where they poured us all glasses of a red substance and encouraged us to engage in intelligent conversation. Who were they trying to fool? Do they really believe they were anything close to a human? A human who experienced the suns rays, who felt pain but yet extreme happiness. A human who dies but lives with such frailty. These people were nothing like a human and if they thought they were, they were really fooling themselves.
They kidnapped me in the middle of the night. Was that supposed to be a humane act? Oh maybe they just thought they'd make an exception this time.
I had no idea how much time had passed, I just lied there absolutely paralyzed with thoughts of greater days spinning in my head. I heard some frantic voices nearby, one that perhaps was Tidus, I don't know. I didn't pay much mind to them and rolled my eyes to the side as I watched a familiar person talking to Tidus. What were they saying? I'm sure it was something about me.
Oh what did I do to deserve this? And when did I become so pathetic. Yuna of the Gullwings would have stood and done something, anything. Yuna of the Gullwings would have devised a plan with Rikku… who wasn't here. Did this prove that I always needed a prompting from someone? That I always thought I was doing well, but in general I was just following orders.
"Ouch!" I whined as a felt a cold hard slap across my face. I didn't deserve that either. However, no matter how much pain my check was in, my body didn't seem to respond and my eyes were once again closed by my will to sleep.
"Snap out of it Yuna!" Tidus' hands lifted my eyelids open; I did as commanded and looked at him. He held a small glass to my lips and I obligingly took a sip.
"We have much to discuss about this one Tidus…"
I continued to drink as I looked up at the women with her arms folded across her chest. I looked back at Tidus who seemed terribly concerned and coaxed me to drink more.
I sat up, swallowing more of the liquid. I felt the warm substance run down my throat and turned to smile at Tidus.
I felt better already.