I don't know if 'bill' is the right word to use, but... I don't care, so yeah. :o)
Zack sighed. "Bill... bill... bill..."
"Bob," said Freddy, coming up behind him, causing Zack to jump. He heard Freddy's familiar snigger, and sighed.
"So you got rid of that girl you picked up last night, then? The one you said was ugly, but then brought home anyways?"
"Dude, keep it down!" hissed Freddy. Zack threw him a questioning look. "She's still in there," he explained, jabbing his thumb towards his bedroom for emphasis.
"You need to send her home. We need to have a Talk."
"Now, Zack, it's things like this that make people think you're gay."
"I'm not -"
"Gay, yes, I know. But when you say, 'We need to have a Talk,'" said Freddy, using a ridiculously high-pitched voice in an effort to imitate Zack, "it doesn't really give out the right impression. Now, if you said something like, "Dude, get that chick the hell out of here,' well, that might have more effect."
Zack stared at Freddy in an attempt to understand him, but gave up, and turned away. "Just send the poor girl home, ok?" Freddy stuck his tongue out at Zack before walking into the bedroom. A few minutes later a leggy blonde girl rushed past him, pausing long enough to give him a fleeting glance before hurrying out of the door. Freddy walked up looking very pleased with himself.
"What did you say?"
"Just that you were planning to photograph her," said Freddy innocently.
"Just like that?" asked Zack suspiciously.
"We-ell, I might've added a little wink." Zack started to say something, then stopped. He walked into the other room and sat down on the couch. Freddy flopped down beside him.
"So what's this Talk that we need to have, then? Hey, have you noticed how if you say the word 'talk' over and over then it loses all meaning? Talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk!"
"Shut up!" snapped Zack, ignoring the hurt look that Freddy sent his way. "Look," he said, pulling himself together with an effort, "we need to get jobs." He ignored Freddy's involuntary shudder and carried on. "We have the phone bill, the electric bill and about fifty other bills, and we can't pay any of them."
"What do you mean, no? It's not a question!"
"No, I'm not getting a job."
"There's no such thing as work-o-phobia, Freddy. We are going to the job centre tomorrow, and we are going to get jobs, ok?"
"No," repeated Freddy stubbornly. "There is absolutely no way that I am going to go anywhere near that place, ok?"
"I can't believe you actually made me come to the job centre!" whined Freddy, dragging his heels.
"I didn't make you come anywhere. I simply said that if you don't come then I'd tell your mom where you're living right now," replied Zack calmly.
"Like I said, dude, you made me," argued Freddy. Zack made no answer, as they were now in front of the job centre.
"So you're telling me that you have no qualifications whatsoever?" said the receptionist behind the counter. Freddy smiled lazily.
"Look," - he checked her name badge - "Sian, if you're looking for a good time, well, I'm sure there'll be plenty of girls out there who'll give me excellent references." Sian just gave him a dark look, before turning her attention to Zack.
"As you seem to be the sane one, may I ask you a few questions?"
"You can ask me all the questions you want," interrupted Freddy.
"Let me get this straight," she said, ignoring Freddy, "you didn't even graduate from high school?"
Zack took a deep breath, wanting to tell his story as briefly as possible so he didn't have to relive his past. "Me and Freddy here, well, we were in a band, and we dropped out of high school to give it all our time, and we got one good record out and then," - he winced - "and then we had a bad breakup. We don't have any qualifications, because we've been living off the royalties of that record. Now they're all gone, and we desperately need a job. Please help us."
She rolled her eyes. "Stop, please, you're breaking my heart. Look, I'll get back to you, if you'll just write down your phone number -"
"No!" said Zack angrily. Sian regarded him coolly.
"Can I help you?"
"You can help me," interrupted Freddy again, annoyed that she didn't seem to care about him.
"You come onto me one more time, Sonic, and I won't be responsible for the consequences."
"Sonic?" said Freddy, confused. "I don't get it."
"You have spiky hair, so does Sonic," explained Zack wearily.
"Is he always like this?" asked Sian, and Zack nodded.
"Pretty much. But, come on! I – we – need jobs!"
"Look, I'll see what I can do, ok? But I'm not promising anything."
"That's good enough, I guess," said Zack, watching as she tapped a few buttons on the computer, then sighed exasperatedly.
"Stupid thing's broken again. I'll be back in a minute, I've got to go get Head Office."
"'Kay." Five minutes after she'd gone, the phone rang. And rang. And rang. Freddy reached for it, but Zack slapped his hand.
"Owww!" he whined, cradling his hand in his other one. "What was that for?"
"Don't answer the phone!"
"But Za-ack! You know a ringing phone annoys me!"
"Whatever, Freddy. Look, I'm gonna go use the toilets, I'll be back in a minute. Don't. Touch. The phone." Freddy grumbled an agreement, and Zack left, looking back every few minutes to make sure he hadn't touched the phone. The minute Zack was out of sight Freddy snatched up the phone.
"Hello? ... Yeah, this is Freeman's Job Centre ... You want a temp.?... Yeah, I can help you ... Is it ok if an assistant comes along, as well? ... Mmm, that's right, you only have to pay the teacher ... Yeah, it is like two for the price of one, I guess ..."
"Freddy! What the hell are you doing?" yelped Zack when he came back, but Freddy shushed him angrily.
"Oh, that? Just a customer talking to her son ... You thought it was a woman, too? Very good guess, sir! ... Yes, we'll be along as soon as possible! ... Horace Green? ... No, no, there's no problem ... And are you the principal? ... I see, so we won'tmeet the principal unless we stay for over a month? ... Ok, so, tomorrow? ... I'll see you then! ... No, thank you!" And with that Freddy put the phone back, and just in time, too, as Sian came back then. Throwing Freddy a warning glance, reminding him of her remark earlier, she spoke to Zack.
"I'm sorry, but nothing's available right now. Do you want to come back tomorrow?"
"Ye – no, no," said Zack, after a sharp dig in the ribs from Freddy. "No, we'll be fine, thanks. We'll, um, do... something. Well, got to go, bye!" he said, as Freddy dragged him towards the door. Freddy paused just before leaving.
"See you, gorgeous," he said with a wink. "Bring on the consequences." Sian picked up the nearest thing, which happened to be a pen, and threw it at him. It whistled through the air, slowly turning over and over, before landing squarely in the middle of his spikes, quivering. He gave her a frightened look, and hurried out of the door after Zack. Sian smiled, and went back to looking busy on the computer.
"Ok," said Zack, once they were safely outside, "what was that all about?"
Freddy smiled smugly. "I got us a job."
"Right. And, um... what kind of job would this be?"
"We are going to be temping at Horace Green. Battle of the Bands is coming up soon, so we are going to do a Dewey, and turn those kids into a rock band!" Freddy said excitedly. Zack blinked.
"And, uh... why exactly would we want to do that?"
What do you think is going to happen, huh? To find out... REVIEW! I'll give the person who guesses closest... a surpise! So review! :o)