Author's Note: I got this idea from a friend of mine actually. She had just mentioned that it would be funny if someone did a fic like this, and with this song! lol, so I decided to make it happen!
Also, you may find this story either funny, or stupid. Doesn't matter, hell I laughed. Maybe you will too! Please read and review! Oh yes, and I will say right now that the characters will be mostly out of character, but that's sometimes to be expected in a humor fic as this.
>>> I posted this again because there were a few things in here I wanted to change, that's all. Please read and review! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha
Sango was sitting on a large boulder by herself near a village. She saw in the distance that Miroku was flirting with some of the village girls….Again. Jeez, when is he not flirting?... with anything?
Sango was fuming and she clenched her fists. 'What's his problem! When we're traveling for jewel shards, he treats me as though I'm the only girl in the world that makes him happy. But whenever we come across a village like this, he always just has to flirt with anything that moves!' Sango screamed in her mind.
'Well, fine! If he's going to be like that the whole time, then he won't ever get what he expects from me.' She smirked, knowing that when they started traveling again with the hanyou and miko, that Miroku would go "insane" without a girl to be with him.
He would have of course flirted with Kagome, but Inuyasha would always get angry and hit the monk on the head.
'Yeah, this is it, no more of him making a fool of me. Miroku, you're not getting any of these goodies ever.'
"Farewell kind villagers!" Miroku called back and waved to the village that he had just exorcized from a 'demon' that had possessed it. Sango rolled her eyes as she saw those same girls wave at him and bat their eyelashes. 'Hmph…Ass kissers…"
Sango was walking behind the group, which had never really happened. Kagome noticed this and walked to her from Inuyasha's side, "Hey Sango, what's wrong?" She whispered.
"I'm so sick of Miroku and all his…well, himself! I can't take it and so I'm not going to let him talk all sweet to me when he doesn't even mean it. It's all going very bad. "
"Sango, everything sounds bad when you say it with that attitude. Just give him another chance." Kagome whispered.
"Kagome…That's the fifth time you've said that to me in a situation like this…" Sango whispered back.
"…Hey, why are we whispering?" Whispered Miroku. He was right behind the girls, his head practically in between theirs.
They both screamed and then soon recovered. Sango hit him, "Don't do that!"
Miroku rubbed his head, "Uhn, my apologies. I had only wished to know what was so secretive with you two."
"It's none of your business." Sango muttered and Inuyasha became impatient, "Will you all shut up and come on? We're almost at the place where the jewel shards are." He said with much irritation and started to lead the way again, Shippo and Kilala sleeping on his head...wtf?...
They all nodded and followed him. Sango made sure that Miroku was far ahead of them before she spoke to Kagome again, "I'll just give up, if he's always gonna be like this, then he doesn't deserve me."
Kagome nodded, "Yeah, but next time he tries to come on to you, we've got to tell him off…But in a way that'll blow his mind." She said in excitement.
"I agree, but how?" Sango asked.
Kagome put a hand under her chin in deep thought, "Oh I think I've got an idea of how…Here's what we'll do..." Kagome whispered in Sango's ear the rest.
"Let's take a break." Kagome suggested. Inuyasha was about to protest, but at seeing everyone sitting down, he just did the same. Kilala and Shippo rested nearby and the other four sat around a fire... that had miraculously started itself…
Sango and Kagome set up things for dinner. They needed a small bucket of water to boil and so Sango turned to Miroku while she stirred something mushy in a little pot. "Hey Miroku, could you please do something for me?"
Miroku nodded, but then got a mischievous look on his face, "Wait wait, for you?... Or to you?"
Sango growled and even Inuyasha was getting scared, "That's it!" She screamed.
Sango unexpectedly smirked and so did Kagome as they stood up together and did a sexy pose.
Inuyasha slapped a hand to his forehead, "Oh man, why do I think that they're going to start rapping about something stupid right now?"
Sango held out her open hand and a microphone appeared in it. They all suddenly heard a beat and both Sango and Kagome were bobbing their heads to it as Sango sang first, "My goodies, my goodies, my goodies, not my goodies OW!"
Inuyasha sand Miroku looked up at them with beady eyes, "Uhhh……Uh?"
"You may look at me and think that I'm just a young girl but I'm not just a young girl. Baby this is what I'm lookin' for: Sexy, independent, down to spend it type that's gettin' his dough. I'm not bein' to dramatic that's the way I've got to have it. "
"Um, Sango? I know you're mad but-" Miroku asked, but his voice was drowned out by the mysterious beat that had come from nowhere.
Kagome had a microphone this time and they both sang, "I bet you want the goodies. Bet you thought about it-"
The monk had a blank look on his face, "…Well yeah…"
"-got you all hot and bothered, mad cause I talk about them. Lookin' for the goodies keep on lookin' cause they stay in a jar Oh oh oh oh yeah!"
Miroku placed a hand under his chin and had a thoughtful look on his face, "So...They were in a 'jar' this whole time were they?...The sneaky little devils." He chuckled and shook his head.
Inuyasha, on the other hand looked confused and angry, "Kagome, this song better not be about me! I'm not perverted like this monk here so why are you singing it too?" He screamed, but his voice cold barely be heard over the music.
Sango and Kagome just kept singing, "Just because you drive a Benz I'm not goin' home with you. You won't get no nookie or the cookies. I'm no rookie. And still I'm Sexy, independent I ain't wit' it so you already know. I'm not bein' too dramatic that's the way I gotta have it. You think you're slick tryna hit but I'm not dumb I'm not bein' too dramatic it's just how I gotta have it."
Inuyasha narrowed his eyes, "Ok…they're having WAY too much fun with this..."He muttered.
Another microphone, once again, appeared out of nowhere in front of Inuyasha and Miroku, the hanyou sighed and gave it to the monk, "Here, you need this more than I do…"
Miroku sighed as well, and took it. He stood up and moved his body to the beat and began to rap when it was his turn, "So damn hot but so young, still got milk on ya tongue, slow down lil one. And you ain't got it all. Hey shawty you think you bad but you ain't bad I'll show you what bad is. Bad is when you capable of beatin' the baddest. I been workin' at it since I eva came to this planet and I ain't quite there yet but I'm gettin' better at it. Matter of fact, lemme tell it to you one mo' again All I got to do is tell a girl who I am (Miroku!) Ain't naa chick in here dat I can't have Bada boom bada bam ba bam!"
Sang rolled her eyes and sang, "You're insinuating that I'm hot, but these goodies boy are not just for any of the many men that's tryna get on top. No you can't call me later. And I don't want your number. I'm not changin' stories just respect the play I'm callin'. I bet you want the goodies. Bet you thought about it, got you all hot and bothered, mad cause I talk about them. Lookin' for the goodies keep on lookin' cause they stay in a jar Oh oh oh oh oh yeah!"
The mysterious beat had stopped and Kagome wiped sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand, "Well, that was fun."
Inuyasha shook his head, "That was stupid…"
"Oh whatever, you know you wanted to rap along to." Kagome teased.
"Yeah, maybe if I was struck with a two by four, someone paid me, gave me all the ramen to last me a life time, and a bag of courage(wtf?)so I could tell you how much I love you, and-" Inuyasha covered his mouth.
"Oh Inuyasha! You do care!" Kagome wet and jumped on him. They started kissing and making out, and getting frisky. Kagome pulled away and looked worried as she asked him, "Hey Inuyasha, now that we're together do you think our relationship is creepy and weird?"
"Kagome, if this relationship wasn't creepy and weird, then I wouldn't be in it." He said and kissed her again.
Miroku and Sango were having their own little discussion.
Miroku looked at Inuyasha and Kagome who were still currently 'busy'. "See? Look! Look at them Sango, why can't we be like them!" Miroku asked desperately.
Sango hit him with her microphone, "Did you not pay any attention to the song at all?"
"I'm sorry Sango, listen, I don't mean to flirt with other girls. It's just that I feel lonely and need someone to be with is all. I'll try to not be after your 'goodies' anymore, alirght? I promise." Miroku tried to convince her.
Sango smiled, "Oh fine, but you better keep your promise."
Miroku smiled too, "I will." He said and kissed her. After a few minutes, they broke apart.
Miroku and Sango just both looked at each other.
The monk had other things on his mind though, "………………….No seriously, where is this jar you spoke of?"
Shippo and Kilala jumped awoke, "I wonder what's been going on around here." Said the small fox demon, he spotted a microphone nearby and picked it up. He sniffed it and scrunched up his nose, "Hmm, it smells like a gangsta."
He and Kilala just shrugged their shoulders.
As the other four were making out, a beat started again and Shippo and Kilala found that their bodies were moving to it.
"Hey…Hey! What's going on? Why do I suddenly feel the need to rap about my goodies?...WAIT! What are goodies!" He asked and started to sing anyway.
"My goodies, my goodies, my goodies, not my goodies, OW!"
"SHIPPO! NO!" All of them shouted.
Shippo looked confused, but the music stopped and the microphones disappeared, "What? I just want some goodies…and I mean the candy kind."