This is my first Hellsing fic!-claps- I kinda worked hard on it, so if you flame me, be nice about it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hellsing..-coughs- T.T But...ONE DAY....I SHALL RULE THE WORLD!!

alu:-throws a book at her-


Never opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don't just say
And nothing else matters
-- Metallica, Nothing Else Matters

Pain. That was all Alucard could feel as he lay there on the table, his crimson eyes glazed and dull. In his body were a multitude of blades, but the one that stuck out was the long one that had impaled his heart. He could feel himself slowly dieing, actually feel his own blood seeping out of his body.

"This is your defeat, Count," A voice whispered, and the vampire strained to look up and focus at the face. Yet, he could not get a clear view, no matter how hard he tried. "This is no nightmare."

He tried to snarl back, tried to defend himself, but only blood seeped out of the corners of his mouth. Footsteps came toward him and stopped in front of him. Again, he tried to focus and came up empty handed. But as he listened, the voice suddenly started going from feminine.

"Your dominion are no more. Your power is no more," It said before it became horrifyingly familiar. "..The Police Girl is dead."

Instantly, he was able to focus and stared, wide-eyed, at his Master. Integra. She was pointing a gun, his OWN gun at him, like it was nothing. "You are a pretty pathetic No-Life King..Now that you have nothing...You were born a dog..You lived as a dog...And now you will die as a dog..."

She pressed the gun to his forehead, cocking it. "May God and Her Majesty be with You." She stared pulling the trigger, whispering,"Amen."

Alucard opened his eyes slowly, taking in his surroundings. He opened them more and for a split second nearly panicked before he forced himself to calm down. "A dream," He snarled, his body drenched in blood. He started to tremble with fury and uncertainty. "Dreams...To think, ME, dreaming....And having a..." He didn't allow himself to say it, he refused to. Humans and weaklings had dreams. He did not.

Yet, there he was, laying in his coffin, trembling and sweating out blood. The vampire groaned and pressed the button, waiting impatiently for the lid to rise on the coffin bed. He climbed out, glancing at the clock on his wall and snarling at it.

Ten A.M. Way too early to be up. Cursing in about three different languages, he grabbed his trenchcoat from a chair and wiped his blood off on it, still trying to calm down. He felt a strange pain in his chest, a constriction in his throat, and it baffled him. "What is it?" He pondered aloud, baring his fangs. "What's the matter with me?"

A low and feral growl escaped his lips as he paced around slightly, suddenly feeling wide awake. His body protested, wanting to sleep, but his mind kept replaying the dream over and over again. He groaned, nearly feeling the pain of his master's own blade impaling his heart, of getting shot by his own gun.

It was like that time before, He thought, still bristling with fury. Except this time... A shudder shot through his spine, as he was suddenly unable to control how he felt. Rage, betrayel, and another strange feeling coursed through his body, and he could not stop them.

It made Alucard feel helpless.

And Alucard hated feeling helpless.

Sitting down, Alucard slowly started to calm down, pushing violent thoughts away from his sleep-deprived mind. The pain started to slowly fade, but his throat still felt constricted. Vampires do not have dreams, He kept trying to convince himself, repeating it over and over again to himself. Vampires do not have dreams, vampires do not have dreams, vampires do not have dreams, vampires do not have---

Wait... He closed his eyes and opened them. Maybe I don't have dreams...At least that often...But.. His eyes traveled to the wall of his room, and he could nearly see who was on the other side, sleeping peacefully. ..I know someone who does.... Standing up, he trotted over to the wall and phased through it, looking around. As he expected, Seras was fast asleep in her coffin.

Asking himself exactly why he was in his fledgling's room and not in his, he sat down in a chair, stared at the coffin intently, and waited.

Seras didn't know what exactly woke her up from her deep sleep, but she grudgingly thought that it better be good. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she pressed the button on her bed controller, yawning as it slowly lifted up. But she nearly jumped when she saw Alucard sitting in a chair, head down, eyes closed.

The police girl had never seen him like this. Instead of his usual attire, he only wore black pants, no shirt. His chest was lean and pale, a scar visible just where his heart would be. His hair was longer than usual, to about his shoulders, yet she had never felt him seem

Lost. She thought simply. That's what he looked like. And if her master was reading her thoughts, he certainly did not show it. Before she could say anything, he spoke.

"Dreams," He muttered tonelessly. "Such useless things....Showing a world that is not meant to be, an illusion, a halucination, a projection of the heart's desire, a manifestation of the darkness that creeps through one's mind..." He looked up, opening his eyes. "Useless...Pointless... Meaningless..."

Seras stood up and took a hesitant step toward him. "..Master?" She said softly, but he made no movement to show he heard her.

"Dreams are for the ones who would rather find the solice their pathetic heart craves than face the reality of the world," He continued. "Heh....It's sad really...when it comes right down to it...I'm over 400 years old...I've fought more battles, recieved more wounds, vanquished more foes...And I can't even handle something as small as a mere dream..." His tone was bitter as something dripped onto the floor. The police girl blinked and stared at it.


Blood? But..

At first she didn't understand. But all of a sudden, she was hit by a wave of anguish that almost made her cry out. And it was coming from her Master. "Master.." She whispered, gulping slightly. "..You're...You're crying....Aren't you?" No reply, which just justified her statement.

"You cling pitifully to your humanity, Police Girl," He said softly, not bothering to wipe away the small streams of blood forming on his cheeks. "So tell me: What is the meaning of these dreams that refuse me the sleep I desire? Why do I tremble when I try to recall them? Why do I fear them; Does that make me weak?" His eyes locked onto hers. "Or do you not have the answers that I seek?"

-nervous laughter- This was supposed to be a one shot thing...But it'll be at least two chapters....Read and Review if you want, just to let me know that someone's out there.