Disclaimer: if One Piece was mine I would not have licensed it to 4kids entertainment
NC: hey guys, my first one-piece fic here! I've only been a One Piece fan for a short time, I don't know a whole lot about it but I know enough to get me by, you see, I started with the manga and fell in love with the story plot, I was overjoyed to find out it was on TV, but to my dismay I discovered the dubbed version, now I know I'm not the only one pissed off about the over edits and un-matching voices so I wrote this to see who else did, hope you guys like it, and sorry for mistakes if you come across them, no flames k...
Down with the dubbed
In a town with no name lived a man. This man lived his life by his job. What was his job? He worked for The Worldwide Entertainment Company Network or the ENC. Company's like Funamation, Pixar, 4kids entertainment, Disney, so on and so forth were all apart of the ECN. What would the ENC do? They are, in so many words, those who would produce, dub, edit, or promote what they had to offer. What would he do? He was the general manager of the complaint center, if any sort of cartoon, anime, or digital character had a problem with something or someone, he's then one who would "try" to fix it, or try to make it better. His job wasn't one with morals. He lied to many saying he'd do his best to fix their problem. He had the power to change it, but most of the time he didn't bother. He only looked out for number one, himself, whatever got him the most money.
He passed a room filled with all sorts of characters, some more patient than others. All of them were in an extremely small room titled "The Waiting Room", like many businesses these characters had to schedule an appointment to see this man. It was his job. It's what he lived for. As he passed through to get to his office he noticed a boy he recognized. A boy in a straw hat. He and a group of people with similar animation glared at him as he entered the next room.
His office was five times bigger than the waiting room with a huge desk of solid oak, bookshelves, and a comfy lazy boy. In front of the solid desk was a single chair, mainly meant for whom he'd be meeting with. As he placed his black trench coat on the coat rack near the door one of his many assistance approached him giving him some needed files.
"Whose my first appointment with?" he asked before sitting at his luxurious desk.
"Your first appointments with a, Monkey D. Luffy" a random assistant in a black suit answered. The man sighed.
"Send him in" the same assistant walked out of the office and into the waiting room. He cleared his throat before speaking.
"Luffy… Monkey D. Luffy?" a small group on one side of the room turned their heads to is direction. The assistant became tense realizing who these people were. The straw-hat pirates. The 17-year-old boy sitting in the middle stood up and began walking toward him. "Right this way" he directed the boy into the room closing the door behind him.
"Luffy, surprised to see you here" the man dressed in a black suite with black sunglasses sarcastically remarked. Monkey D. Luffy had been trying to schedule an appointment to talk to this man for more than three months. He would have preferred to simply raid the office to get what he wanted, but Nami said it wouldn't be a good idea. They would be outnumbered. As each week past Luffy was more determined to talk to him, for every week a new episode of One Piece appeared on the Fox Box, now called 4kids TV.
The leader of the straw-hat pirates wasn't himself, he was pissed off, his facial expression did not fail to show it. The corporate big shot named Larry (not real name) signaled Luffy to come closer. "Now I understand that you have a problem, tell me and ill try to fix it in the best way I can" he stated in Japanese. Larry was multilingual so he would be able to understand Luffy in any language.
"Explain to me" Luffy started in his original Japanese voice. "Why I sound like this!" he ended in his newly dubbed voice. Larry let out a sigh.
"Luffy we've been over this, we didn't pick your voice" he started (in English) before being interrupted by Luffy.
"But you had the power to say we don't like it, you had the power to change it, you had the power to say no!" he stated going back to his Japanese voice.
(The rest of the conversations in Japanese just picture subtitles at the bottom)
"I'm not the one who deals with those decisions, there's nothing I can do about it, is there anything else you'd like to complain about?" Luffy gave a death glare before speaking again.
"As a matter of fact I have a list" before continuing Luffy pulled out a small piece of paper. "Ok why is the devil's fruit called the cursed fruit, what was wrong with the devil's fruit? Why is The Going Merry called The Merry Go? And how come you changed what I said when I was little to "I got a punch like a rocket" rockets weren't even freakin invented at the time! Not only that but it makes no sense… rockets don't punch, well when I think about it neither do pistols, wait I didn't say pistols punch, I said my punch was as powerful as a pistol! Wait are pistols powerful? Wait- that's not the point!" Luffy said getting a little distracted.
Larry rolled his eyes. "Then what is the point, Luffy?" Luffy didn't hesitate to answer.
"The point is you guys are editing One Piece to much! You're destroying its original story plot! Your ruining everything Oda-sensei worked so hard to create!" Luffy waved his fist in the air. Larry sighed again.
"Luffy there the ones who license it, if they find a problem or something they don't like they wont hesitate to change it-"
"You can change it, I know you can, all you corporate big shots have some sort of power!" Luffy interrupted.
"No we cant!" Larry yelled back.
"Well I know you can!" Luffy protested. They began staring each other down when a weird alarm went off.
"What's that?" Luffy asked referring to the ringing noise that filled the air. It was the alarm that stated when a certain appointment was over.
"Your times up Luffy, please take this complimentary ham as a gift for the inconvenience" Larry pushed a button on his desk silencing the alarm. A ham was thrown at Luffy as two assistance came and escorted him out.
"Hey wait, you bastard! I'm not done with you yet!" Luffy was thrown back into the waiting room. He glared at the door then looked at ham, realizing it was there. "Meat!"
"Glad that's over, now whose appointment is next?" Larry asked his assistant Stan (not real name).
"You'll be seeing a Nami, then a Roronoa Zoro" Larry's eyes popped out.
"What!" he screamed snatching the clipboard from Stan. "Nami, Rorona Zoro, Chopper, Sanji, Ussop, Captain Shanks?" he read from the clipboard before looking at Stan. "What the hell, I have appointments with all these pirates!" Stan nodded. "They have appointments so you have to meet with them" Stan explained. Larry sank in his chair. "Damn it, there all probably going to complain about the dub, damn it!" Larry massaged his temples.
In the waiting room a Stan lifted the clipboard to his eyes. Lifting his head he called out the next name on the list. "Nami, Mr. Fittersworth will see you now"
NC: well there you go the first chapter, hope you guys like it, I haven't even scratched the surface as to how many ways they've messed up One Piece, ill cover from renaming Zoro, Zolo, (shudder) all the way to why the marines have water guns, ill try to update at least twice a week or more, ill try to make the future chapters a bit more funnier and not so serious, hope to get a few reviews, it would make me happy! And if your going to flame me please don't be about some technical stupid crap like, that company doesn't exist, this is what it would look like in my mind, so if your going to flame me make it worth my time, besides that have fun and tell me what you think!