Zakura: what the heck are you crying for this time?
Miss.Ecofreak: dork2 is over, never again can I write more randomness in it
Zakura: oh... but you can write a sequel
Miss.Ecofreak: good idea! It's a trilogy! (although there is only two parodies in the story) Now that I've completed Jak3 and Dork2 Ican finally start uploading my fifth fic and third parody, I give you: DORK3! NOTHING SPECIAL!
Starting the best game ever
Once upon a time in the Jak and Daxter-world a large blue air train named Sophia was driving trough the unforgiving wasteland.
As the train stopped, two freedom league guards dressed in blue armor came out along with a prisoner.
"Can we drive again? That was fun!" the prisoner asked.
"Shut up Jak! You're banished!" another guy said, an evil-looking guy with a book named count Vaguer (the man was called that, not the book).
"It's Veger! You idiot!" said count Vulgar, "Argh, I hate you miss Ecofreak", then he turned to Jak again, "By order of the great council of Haven City you are banished to the wasteland for life."
"And that's a bad thing?" Jak asked as the idiot you should have known he is if you have read Dork2.
"That's practically a death sentence" Ashelin, the governor answered.
"That doesn't sound too good" Jak said.
Suddenly a new voice was heard from the air train.
"We are outraged! Outraged beyond words!" the monkey-bird in the train answered.
A precursor…ottsel and a flut-flut…leprechaun appeared behind him.
"We want a recount" the ottsel said.
"Right, not everyone agrees with this ridiculous decree!" the leprechaun said.
"Hey! That's my line!" Pecker said to the leprechaun, Well…ehm…eh.
"You can go with him if you want to" Vegar said, ignoring the fact that I just misspelled his name, again.
"I'll stay. I hate riding air trains anyway" Well said, jumping out of the vehicle and down on the desert sun.
"Good bye Jak, remember to stay out of the sun" Pecker said, "And remember to drink lots of water"
"Aw, I wanted coke" Jak complained, he looked around, "Hey, there's no shade around here, or water"
Ashelin gave Jak some little glowing thingy, "good luck Jak, and stay alive or I'll kill you" she said.
"Ok. What does this thing do?" Jak asked shaking the glowing thingy.
"Don't break it you moron!" Ashelin said, "I've got something else for you too"
She went back into the air train and came out with a t-shirt, but as she came back out, Jak, Well and even Daxter and Pecker were gone.
"Where did they go?" Ashelin asked before walking in to the air train again.
Somewhere far away, Jak and his friends were hiding behind a large rock.
"That was too close" Pecker said.
"What did the t-shirt say anyway?" Jak asked.
"I looked like "Erol is the best-looking cyborg ever"" Well said and shivered, "I don't like Ashelin's t-shirts"
"Fine, let's and die in the desert!" Jak said, "I've always wanted to try that!"
Suddenly a flashback started so that the readers would know why the hell Jak and Daxter were out in the wasteland with Well and Pecker.
In the freedom league headquarters Torn was looking at a large thing.
He was wearing a t-shirt; the text on it said "It's so sad Praxis isn't appearing in this game".
"Dude, we've got some serious trouble" he said.
"You bet, the metalheads are attacking from the west and kg-bots have taken over the industrial area!" Jak said.
"Who cares? I'm talking about these t-shirts! Don't Ashelin ever run out of these things?" Torn said.
"That's a problem" Well said, "Who cares about metalheads when there's still more t-shirts around in the city?"
Then Samos the sage came in, he was wearing a t-shirt saying "I love this city. And the guy who founded it", "I like these t-shirts, they're kind of sexy" he said.
"And they fit so well into the storyline. Being completely ridiculous" his daughter Keira said, she was wearing a t-shirt saying "Who cares about Mar? Jak is waaaaay cooler anyway".
"That's cool you guys… but am I the only one who have noticed there's a war going on?" Jak asked.
"What war?" Torn asked, proving Jak obviously was the only one who had noticed.
Back to the present Jak and his friends were walking around lost and alone in the wasteland.
"Man, I wished my daddy would come pick me up" Jak said, "But my cell-phone is out of power".
"Who's your daddy?" Daxter asked, although he had known Jak almost his entire life he had never seen his father.
"I have no idea. But he should have saved me anyway!" Jak said.
Then they all fainted because author's rabbit was bored of their pointless conversation.
So we take another flashback shall we?
The palace fell over. Flashback over.
Jak, Daxter, Pecker and Well…ehm…eh was sleeping in the desert… fine, they were unconscious.
Then a couple of guys named Damas and Kleiver appeared.
"Cool. We found some live ones!" Kleiver said.
Damas picked up the glowing thingy in Jak's hand.
"Here's the beacon we were picking up, who gave you this?" he asked Jak.
Jak didn't answer, he was still unconscious.
"Stupid head. He won't even answer! Man he's just as unfriendly as my son" Damas said. "But we'll take them with us anyway"
So Kleiver and Damas brought Jak, Daxter, Pecker and Well…ehm…eh to Spargus City.
What is Spargus you might ask? What? You haven't played Jak3? Read the next chapter and you'll find out.