Disclaimer: Full Metal Alchemist and characters belong to Arakawa Hiromu and Square Enix . . . Has this become an Alternate Universe fic? You just don't know! Artistic license and spoilers abound- so untwist your panties and simply have fun.

To any stranger, untrained to military life, it would have looked like his office was the center of command during wartime; people rushing about in a desperate attempt to get everything delivered in an orderly fashion and do their real work at the same time. Roy had been trying to finish off the paperwork that had collected on his desk before noon- but yet another box thudded down on the small mountain that had formed in front of him.

Roy detested birthdays.

Why celebrate turning a year older? It was beginning to feel like the countdown until his death- or even worse, retirement. If he didn't work his way up to the top before he hit his forties, he wouldn't have any chance of continuing in the army as an old man. No matter how good of a State Alchemist he might be, even age could eventually render him useless to the military.

Turning thirty felt like he had wasted too many years along the way. He had joined the military young, had expected to become bigger than Lieutenant Colonel while he was in his twenties . . . underneath his own power. Filling up the political vacuum that had been created by the Furher's death and the following disappearances of other important military officers somehow left Roy feeling unsatisfied. Even though he was finally in a position with true authority, change was still an agonizing slow process. The army was in complete disorder simply because the chain of command had been so thoroughly broken. Roy had his hands full trying to assign people he could trust to take over the countless amount of ordinary soldiers- the lot of which seemed to be taking advantage of the chaos to desert their posts.

It reminded him of a missing Alchemist, one that had disappeared in the general chaos following the Furher's death. His corpse wasn't found in the rubble that had once been Central City's Military Headquarters. There had been no word from the brat . . . beyond the fact that his little brother had shown up in Rizenbol, his body apparently returned to the same day before he had been transmuted into a suit of armor. Roy had gone to see Alphonse in what could have been considered desperation, hoping that his State Alchemist would just as amazingly materialize if he went. The visit had been fruitless, since Alphonse didn't have any memories of the time he had spent as a soul affixed to armor.

He had been struggling with the most rudimentary of alchemy arrays in the front lawn with ridiculously small hands when Roy first met Alphonse Elric in the flesh. His hair was short and a plain, dirty blonde color with lightly colored puppy-dog eyes. The boy had barely reached above Roy's waist, his face dirty from playing all day long as he demanded for some sort of present or candy. Oblivious and trusting, an innocent smile that went from ear to ear- everything that the Elrics hadn'tbeen. Roy could only stare at the child like some sort of dumb, mute idiot; realizing for the first time just how young that hulking suit of armor had really been. He had been suddenly afflicted with guilt for treating the Elric brothers so harshly, actually having the time to feel sorry for himself now that the country was at some sort of relative peace.

Roy wouldn't have told Alphonse a thing, regardless of if he had been ordered by the Rockbells to stay quiet. He didn't have the heart to destroy that innocence and naiveté, the second chance Alphonse had managed to regain . . . likely at the cost of his older brother's own life. It was like Edward Elric had managed to leave this world completely, gone without a trace, without even saying a word. Roy had assumed that Edward would want to have one final scene, another tantrum about quitting the military for good . . . before the Full Metal Alchemist predictably came back crawling on his knees with his tail between his legs.

Only this time, it seemed like the smart-mouthed brat was gone for good.

Roy sighed, resting his chin on one hand as he leaned back in his chair and surveyed the presents that he would eventually have to go through or just incinerate the lot of. Boxes of varied shapes and sizes, all wrapped up in bright ribbons and paper with individual notes on each one. There was enough here to count for all the female personal on base two times over. Roy would bet money that some men had sneaked their own gifts into the mess in the groundless hope that he might be bribed into letting them off easy.

He would have set fire to his entire desk and the explosion of presents on top if he didn't know that in the midst of all these useless gestures would likely be something from Riza. She was a smart woman, and had bought him serviceable presents year after year. He still carried about a pocketknife from the first few times Riza had given him something for his birthday, a remarkably well-made piece of steel. There was also a handsome leather wallet when Roy had complained of his old one finally breaking, new filing cabinets for the office, and even a gun cleaning set. He had yet to receive a birthday present from Hawkeye that he couldn't use . . . it was the rest of the lot that he was dreading going through.

Roy closed his good eye, already feeling a strain on his vision from being overworked. It was almost going to be a year since he had been wounded. Permanently blinded.

No doctor or medical Alchemist had given him hope for anything different, so Roy had learned to accept it along with so much else. All he could do was learn to work with it and eventually overcome it . . . but that didn't keep Roy from getting headaches and having trouble gauging long distances. At least he instinctively knew the length of his arm and what he could easily reach instead of making himself into a fool by knocking things over in another clumsy mistake- Roy managed to keep that within the privacy of his own apartment. Riza at least had the good grace to pretend like nothing had happened while she tidied up after him, while everyone else had to stare upon him with pity . . . or with open horror at the eye patch he wore to cover the scar tissue.

It didn't seem to deter the flow of birthday presents, making Roy wonder how any of these idiots had found out about it in the first place. He had hired extra secretaries since becoming a temporary, military Head of State- and two had quit this morning after trying to keep track of all the birthday cards coming in as well. Havok had stepped out for a cigarette break hours ago; leaving Riza, Fuery, and several other dedicated souls to deal with the circus that had become of his office. Roy moaned, flicking his gaze around the presents and paperwork to Hawkeye going through a collection of messages at her own desk. If the intelligent bitch hadn't wisely positioned her desk exactly by the door to make sure a certain commanding officer wouldn't leave work early as he had done countless times before, Roy would have tried escaping long ago. Instead, he was stuck here until Riza dutifully checked out at five o'clock- thus giving him permission to leave as well. Even so, Roy's mind was working at a furious pace in attempt to figure out some way to convince Riza they should all just pack up and go home . . .

He doubted that repeating the fact that it was his birthday would work as an excuse on Hawkeye.

Roy began absentmindedly scratching the tip of his nose instead of attempting to actually get something done, leaning back in his chair in a slovenly manner . . . exactly on time for the door to open and let in a soldier that made the whole room go still.

He heard the distinct sound of high heels before he could actually make out the petite feet and slender black shoes that definitely weren't a part of military uniform. Neither were the thin white stockings that covered her perfect legs up to mid-thigh, allowing the slightest, teasing bit of tan skin be shown before Roy's engrossed stare hit the blue miniskirt. He had to blink at that, letting his eye rest for a moment before checking again just to make sure it wasn't a trick of his inconsistent eyesight. The miniskirt was still there in all it's pleated glory, underneath a standard and stiff jacket that soldier wore; an utter shame as it hid the slightest curve of a breast.

And, to top it all off, she was a blonde. Golden, glimmering hair pulled up into two perfect pigtails that fell down to her shoulders. Roy had the sense of mind to stop scratching his nose before she turned away from Riza, able to get past his secretary with a few, soft words. He barely noticed how Hawkeye was staring after her, struck dumb by the strange, new woman's approach.

A blonde beauty in a miniskirt. She was his ideal woman, plucked straight out of dreams, and seemed to be carrying a small envelope that was meant for him. His chair suddenly seemed to become unbalanced at that moment, and Roy had to jerk himself upright and slam both feet on the ground in order to regain his seat . . . still managing to look like a fool, but it was better than if he had fallen over completely.

"General Mustang?" was asked in a heartbreakingly soft and shy manner, some aristocratic daughter that was horribly out of place among the other she-beasts prowling around in the military ranks. He liked the sound of her saying his name, wanting to tell her that it was alright to call him 'Roy' . . . and immediately felt the heat of Riza's glare turn up a notch even across the room, like she could read his mind. Roy snapped his full attention back to the new woman addressing him- determined to get her phone number before she left- and found himself staring into a pair of golden eyes.

Her coloring wasn't all that odd. Even Riza had yellow hair and darker eyes- but that was like comparing a piece of straw to the sun. It was like looking into a bizarre, mirror image of Edward Elric; one that was pretty, demure, and more importantly, female. She didn't seem like the type that would give him attitude- in fact, she could be a wife in an instant, in Roy's own opinion. Her entrance into his office was all Roy needed to decide he wanted her.

"Yes?" He tried to make the simple response as charming as possible, hoping that his eye patch wouldn't be too much of a deterrent. She raised up one thin eyebrow at that, bringing Roy's attention to the complimenting smear of glittering, tan make-up shadowing her eyes. It just made that gold light up in comparison; a lovely set of red lips that pursed and glistened wetly below . . . and finally opened up to speak.

"It's an urgent telegram for you, Sir," she prompted, holding the folded piece of paper in her hand up higher without actually shoving it into Roy's face. He took it slowly, his mind racing as he tried to think of something that would keep her there beyond the necessary delivery of this message. He flicked the paper open, his vision needing a moment to adjust . . .

'If you're reading this, you really have gotten old.'

Painfully familiar handwriting, that sort of childish scribble unique anywhere.

Roy's head whipped up, staring up at that woman in mute shock as she grinned- exactly in the same manner as Edward Elric had done, white teeth flashing in triumph.

Roy felt his jaw dropped as he finally recognized just who was standing by his desk. He couldn't help glancing back down at those remarkable legs; both natural instead of one being auto-mail. Roy had to read the smart, arrogant message one more time just to be sure, then went back to that face . . . a little older now, the childish roundness to the cheeks gone, more mature and defined than before; if not any taller.

He hadn't seen the Full Metal Alchemist for years, but that wasn't a reason not to recognize him, no matter what he was wearing. He was damned lucky that there was a nice wall of birthday presents to hide his shocked reaction from his fellow officers- while Edward's grin grew wider every passing second.

He softly cleared his throat, refolding the message and tucking it into his breast pocket . . . buying precious time to collect himself while the former missing Alchemist gloated quietly. It took a tremendous amount of will not to just smack that sneer off the idiot's face and demand where he had been all this time. As rattled as he was by the brat's sudden appearance in drag, Roy understood that he had to go along with this act as long as they were in his office and under watchful eyes.

"Well, I see that this needs my personal attention," Roy finally mustered up a good excuse, pushing himself out of the chair and waving a hand at the 'message girl' to start moving. Edward raised up a fine brow, his smirk so much more defined with a little bit of lipstick; but he turned around and began walking toward the door nonetheless. Roy followed immediately on instinct alone, his mind blanking for a moment that this was Edward Elric when that skirt started swishing about the boy's legs.

It demanded his whole attention, Roy hardly seeing the rest of his staff scowling at him in pure loathing.

"But, Sir- . . ." Fuery moaned in a futile attempt to stop Roy, one hand raised up as if he just might dare to hold him back. He patted the Lieutenant once on his shoulder in reassurance before easily breezing past the man, leaving him whimpering alone as he stared at the daunting pile of birthday presents Roy was leaving behind. Nobody knew just how hard it was for Roy to stroll behind Edward at an easy pace instead of running off with the idiot to someplace private so he could demand a fucking explanation for it all! It was one thing to make a surprise visit after disappearing off the face of the earth- to show up in the military uniform of Roy's dreams, shamelessly wearing girls' clothing just to make an utter fool of him was another matter entirely. Roy refused to let this get the best of him, determined to play along even if it killed him . . . at least while they were still on military grounds and he had a title to uphold.

"Don't have too much fun," Hawkeye murmured in a voice that promised punishment later. She didn't even look up from her papers, obviously already aware of what was going on. Riza was probably only letting him go because it was his birthday, a surprisingly sentimental woman at times. Edward didn't seem bothered at the response, hell; the brat had probably already worked out some sort of deal with her. Roy would have started to intensely hate the both of them for conspiring against him- if Edward didn't lean forward ever so slightly to open the door and obliviously show off the slightest hint of white panties.

Definitely silk and cut for a girl, but on Edward's ass.

The door was shut behind them before Roy came to his senses long enough to realize that they were out in the hallway. He looked down both ways, checking to see that there were no personnel to spy on them for now. Edward spun around in a manner that would have befitted a young girl, quite pleased with herself for pulling such a stunt on Roy Mustang. He opened his mouth to say something that would no doubt be smart and filled with foul language . . .

Roy grabbed the insolent pup by the scruff of his neck, slamming his lips down on top of the blonde's own in a kiss he had meant to give years ago. Edward squirmed and protested for a moment, both of them staggering back until Ed hit the wall. The shorter blonde resisted for the proper amount of time, a few curse words spilling out between their mouths at the rough handling. Roy didn't really give a damn, more intent on kissing the utter life out of the brat . . .

He'd be damned if Edward wasn't wearing vanilla-flavored lip-gloss, a ridiculously expensive import from none other than Ishibal natives. One hand was slipped around Roy's back smooth as water, one leg prodding between his knees in a silent attempt to get closer. It made Roy have to wonder if Edward had learned that from someone else- and wanted to murder that someone out of pure jealousy. Ed's aggressive flirting shouldn't have made him this upset; it was more the fact that Hughes had been right. A nameless stranger had probably gotten to Edward first, and he could hardly stand the thought of it.

Roy came to his senses, grabbing the obnoxious little snot by the shoulders and pushing him off quickly. Edward stood there grinning like he had won some sort of prize, which only pissed Roy off further. How dare the fucking midget show up here after so long, having never once sent word that he was alive! Did he have any idea of the slow numbness Roy had gradually worked up as the months passed by without any sign of Edward Elric? He had already begun to start thinking about the possibility that the Full Metal Alchemist really had died, and then the blonde showed up in front of him like no time had passed at all.

Showed up in a miniskirt and two real legs of flesh and blood.

"Wha- . . . Ho- . . . Whe- . . . the fuck!" Roy couldn't make a whole sentence, unable to decide which question to ask first. Edward just smiled right back into Roy's sputtering face; shifting his weight back in a way that forced him to look back down at that damn skirt.

"Let's go somewhere else before we get into that," Edward whispered into his ear- needing to haul himself up onto the tip of his toes by an arm hooked over Roy's shoulder. He couldn't help but notice it was Ed's left arm, checking back at the other; unable to tell if there was auto-mail underneath that uniform or not. Roy wanted a goddamn explanation for this all- why Edward was alive, had two real legs and the audacity to show up in the heart of military command in that outfit.

Instead, he followed like a dog after Edward to wherever the shorter blonde had in mind; every step making the Alchemist's hips sway back and forth until Roy's gaze couldn't be ripped off of that wonderfully developed rear . . . officially gone dumb with desire.


Riza sighed down at her paperwork, doing her best to ignore anyone who came in with yet another gift for Roy since the pile of presents on his desk was already obviously where the rest should go. She also tried not to listen to the rest of the staff go on about the short and slender little beauty that had just walked in, how old habits never died, damn Mustang for stealing yet another woman from them and etc. Riza couldn't help but keep an ear out for any sort of talk that might point toward deeper problems. Roy depended entirely too much on his natural charm, which only wore off more and more each day. He didn't think to listen to his subordinates and make sure that they were all undoubtedly loyal. Roy was much too oblivious, arrogant, and dense as a rock when it came to certain things . . .

Black Hayate began barking outside, no doubt trying to call her attention. Someone important was either entering or leaving the building. Riza frowned, carefully finishing up her last sentence on the page before putting the pen down. She rose from her desk and quickly went to the window, her fellow subordinates not even noticing her moving as they speculated on how far the Fuhrer would have gotten with that blonde number by now.

Riza looked down at the front grounds, quickly noticing Black Hayate running up to meet another dog. Even from the second floor, Riza could tell that the other dog had one auto-mail leg, his leash leading up to a slim figure in a blue sundress and wide-brimmed hat. Riza immediately recognized Winry Rockbell and her dog; the girl showing up willingly at a place where the man who executed her parents under orders.

Today was just full of unexpected guests.

She didn't even bother asking Fuery or Havoc to take care of things, deciding to follow the example of her superior officer and leave without a word. Riza made short work of out of the office, down the stairs, and through the front entrance; pausing once to make sure that her uniform was still in impeccable place before calling out to the girl.

"What a surprise, Miss Winry! What are you doing in Central City?" Riza waved a hand in greeting as she went up to meet the genius mechanic. Black Hayate barked one more time at the strange dog before quickly trotting up to Riza's heels. He was trained not to act too excited, but the excessively wagging tail told her just how happy the dog was to see her. Riza hadn't been able to go on her usual breaks because of Roy's birthday, so she hadn't been able to give Black Hayate his normal amount of attention.

"Riza! It's been forever!" Winry cried out, though she was standing right in front of the girl. Not much time had passed since she had last seen the female mechanic; just as much with Edward Elric. Now, the both of them showed up in the same day looking like the years had treated them well. Winry's face was a little bit longer, her eyes and lips more pronounced; but still childish in the soft-blue dress with a large yellow flower on the bottom of the skirt. It was a good thing she did have such a tough dog with her, otherwise such an innocent-looking girl was bound to call trouble to herself in a big city like Central.

"How have you been? I can't believe how big Black Hayate's gotten!" Winry asked warmly, holding her free hand down to the other dog. Black Hayate just glared at the offered fingers, not even bothering to sniff them before taking a seat squarely in front of Winry's dog. Black Hayate was protective of his master, obviously not about to let any other animals enter her affections.

"Today's been a little troublesome, but it's a nice surprise to see you here," Riza answered honestly, smiling at the girl. It was truly pleasant to see both Winry and Edward doing so well, even if the brats didn't have the common courtesy to contact either her or Roy beforehand. They had both been worried sick, gradually beginning to accept that Edward Elric was no longer in this world if not truly dead, Alphonse Elric was nothing more than an ordinary little boy now, and Winry Rockbell would never be able to get over her parent's death. Riza had a hard enough time hiding her shock over seeing the Full Metal Alchemist waltz into the office as if no time had passed at all . . . and in Roy's fantasy of the female military uniform, complete with a miniskirt. Thankfully all the women and any man they could get their claws into unanimously voted down his first bill as Fuhrer. Even so, with Edward showing up so ridiculously out of place, Riza didn't know why more people hadn't recognized the bo- . . . man, Riza corrected herself, unable to call Edward anything different after seeing how much he'd grown up, a little more mature if not any taller.

"Den's starting to get old, so I really can't leave him at home. I just thought he should see a little bit more of the world before . . . before he . . ." Winry trailed off sadly, smiling in a lonely way that meant she had already accepted the fact. She was older too, handling the inevitable death of beloved pets very well; but, something about her was still very young as well. Riza hated to think that the matter of the fact might be that she was getting old herself. Birthdays passed by with little celebration, most often working in the office instead of partying to the point of ridiculousness, unlike some officers.

"So, I see Edward is doing well," Riza urged the conversation into more polite grounds when the silent pause began to grow uncomfortable. Surprisingly enough, Winry blushed liked she had been there herself; sandaled feet shuffling around on the paved road nervously. Black Hayate's ears perked, noticing the embarrassment of the new and suspicious person standing by the strange dog. He was very good on picking up people's emotions, sometimes better at finding the guilty criminal in a lineup than the witnesses were.

"Ed asked me to help with . . . um, that. Did it work?" Winry asked, scratching the side of her cheek as if trying to decide between being proud or humiliated. Even though she hadn't been the one actually strolling about in drag trying to get into the Fuhrer's pants, she had definitely had a hand in that outfit. Riza had been wondering how the Full Metal Alchemist had managed to find matching shoes that certainly weren't military issue, along with the well-done make-up and hair. Edward had never been known for his fashion sense before, rather taken to wearing black since he was twelve years old.

"Perhaps a little too well," Riza sighed, recalling how Roy had been all but drooling over the formerly-missing Alchemist. She had been doing her best not to jump out of her seat and demand an answer from Edward at gunpoint for why he had been gone so long, but silently went along with it instead. She had been slightly interested to see how long it would take Roy to notice as well . . . only to find herself growing more and more irritated with every passing second as Roy continued on obliviously. Really, he could be such an idiot at times. If Riza didn't keep an eye out for him, Roy would have been dishonorably discharged from the military years ago- not to mention the illegitimate, bastard children he had undoubtedly sired along the way. Roy didn't know how deeply indebted he was to her for always making sure there was a condom in the Fuhrer's desk or coat, knowing for damn sure that the fool didn't even bother to buy the things.

"I almost didn't believe Ed when he told me who it was for," Winry giggled nervously at the end, trying to make polite conversation out of it all. Riza just smiled back quietly at the mechanic, having realized many years ago that no woman would ever be able to stand the Full Metal Alchemist for long. He was still a selfish, arrogant brat that was far too prone to doing things his own way, without ever informing anyone else. Today had just been another prime example.

"Is . . . is he around?" the girl asked when the silence grew uncomfortable again.

Riza was certain that Winry wasn't referring to Edward, but the man who had killed her parents. If only the girl could see Roy when the man was finally off duty and let himself break down. There was so much regret in the man's heart that it hurt just watching as Roy drank himself to death, alone. He wouldn't let anyone join him, not since Hughes had died. Mustang had been trying to drown himself in the responsibility of his new position in the army, wasting away quietly no matter what Riza tried. Even so, it had still stung a bit inside when Riza had seen Roy's reaction to Edward's appearance, true and honest expression flooding into his face. She hadn't been able to do anything for Mustang, not like Edward could. It hurt- just ever so slightly- but she had to admit Edward just might be able to bring back that idiotic, perverted man that Riza had first sworn to follow as her commanding officer.

"I think that the Fuhrer is probably busy right now. Why don't you come with me to get some tea?" Riza suggested instead, wanting to divert them both away from this. She didn't really mean to think about what the Full Metal and Flame Alchemist might be up to by themselves, or have to worry about Mustang being sure to take the necessary precautions. It clearly wasn't her problem, so all Riza could do was take one possible threat out of the area. For better or worse, she would leave those two to their business and get Winry away before she could possibly interrupt them.

"I think I would like that," Winry agreed in a defeated tone, glancing back toward the military building in obvious longing. Riza just smiled civilly as she had been doing all day, resigned to allowing Roy this one day of freedom.


A quick shove and one locked door later, Roy finally had the older Elric brother alone in a room, without any prying eyes or listening ears. After the smoke had cleared and the military recovered from the mess Edward had left behind, Headquarters found itself with numerous empty rooms that had been cleared out. The Full Metal Alchemist somehow managed to strike the final blow against the Homunculus and all the traitors and spies that had been connected with them. The majority of them had to have been removed, leaving the current army understaffed, but Roy was still paranoid and secretive. He couldn't risk any sort of blemish on his newly found authority . . . however, he still managed to find loopholes to those rigid rules of etiquette. Being promoted to Fuhrer meant having the master key the building.

The room was drab, not exactly the place he'd imagine for finally having the Full Metal Alchemist in. It used to be a study, but the bookshelves were empty. All texts had been confiscated and were slowly being redistributed by the Central Library; once they had made sure it carried no heretic Alchemy equations or anti-government sentiments. There used to have been a large carpet on the floor, a clear outline on the wood that hadn't been protected from treading feet, but it was gone now. Similarly, large squares and rectangles were imprinted into the walls to mark where original paintings had once hung. Many of the valuable items in Military Headquarters had gone missing as well, mostly likely sold off for a nice sum by the thieving traitors that had deserted.

At least there was still furniture, placed miserably in the center of the room. Two couches sat directly across from each other with a little trash scattered between them. Some soldiers must have been using it as a break area, though Roy didn't understand why anyone would willing want to stay in such a depressing place. The only saving grace was the large windows that stretched all the way to the ceiling. They were high enough for there to actually be a view over the city's rooftops, distant mountains that Roy didn't give a damn about appreciating right now.

All he cared about was that there was no chance of interruption as he turned around on the Full Metal Alchemist. Nobody even knew that he had walked in here with an upstart little brat in drag, instead of an attractive young girl. Well, except for Riza, and she seemed to be in on the whole plot . . . not that Roy was about to complain when the result was Edward Elric wearing a skirt.

The blonde was still recovering his balance, wobbling forward on heels that he wasn't as accustomed to as Roy had first assumed. That didn't even matter though, not when Roy was caught up in everything above the ankles. Ed had always known how to put on a show, but this was rather ridiculous. How was he supposed to act like a gentleman when the smart-mouthed idiot was bouncing around in barely decent attire? There was no way that anyone could blame Roy for what would follow, not even Riza. Edward had called it upon himself the moment he had put that skirt on.

"Well, happy bir- . . ." Edward began, wearing that insolent smile from the first moment Roy had actually recognized the brat. They may have been reunited for only a few minutes, but Roy had already figured out that the best way to interrupt Edward was to kiss him firmly.

He grabbed both arms in order to hold the Full Metal Alchemist still while he leaned down to assault the blonde's mouth all over again. It wasn't just the lip-gloss this time that was driving him wild, but the taste of Edward himself and the warm, velvety inside of his mouth. Roy would have never imagined this sort of scenario for himself, all too caught up in the moment to give a damn about the consequences this could bring about later. Hell, the Full Metal Alchemist was supposed to be dead, but somehow he'd managed to cheat that too.

"So, you like your present?" Edward asked when Roy finally allowed them both the chance to breathe again. The blonde actually had the audacity to lick his lips like a cat that had just swallowed up a mouse whole, making Roy wonder just who was being taking advantage of here.

"You little shit, where have you been!" Roy demanded, not about to be drawn into Edward's game. His hands tightened around Edward's arm, noticing that the right one was solid and hard . . .

Roy glanced down at the blonde's feet, checking again the two legs that both seemed to be made of true flesh with none of the terrible scarring that was usually leftover on any sort of Human Transmutation. There was a reason why it was taboo practice. Edward, however, seemed content to dabble around in the art, a child that never learned his lesson. Roy let his hand slide down the thick sleeve of Edward's uniform, catching the blonde's fingers and tugging off the glove that had been covering them.

Sure enough, underneath were mechanical digits, steel shaped into something that resembled muscles with fine electric wiring for veins. Roy had been foolish enough to assume that since Edward had managed to regain his leg, he had also gotten his arm back as well. He was still in a bit of shock from merely seeing the Elric brat alive, his brain not picking up on these details like usual.

"What about your leg?" Roy asked softly, not really surprised to see the auto-mail. It was more the thought of Edward willingly performing the Alchemy that required human life for Equivalent Trade. Just the mere mention of the act could make weaker Alchemists break into tears, but Roy had managed to wrestle it down to slight, instinctive nausea. He had to when one of his subordinates was constantly wrestling with the equation to make human life.

"It only took one arm to get back here . . ." Edward trailed off, eyes rolling over to Roy's face and noting the confused look plastered all over his face. The shorter blonde sighed heavily, waving his hand through the air in defeat.

"It would take too long to explain right now. I already went through all this trouble, so . . ." Edward trailed off, big golden eyes enhanced by the mascara. Roy should have been able to resist, but the Full Metal Alchemist had brought up a very valid point. Edward Elric was standing there in a miniskirt and high-heels, all wrapped up in this flamboyant clothing for his birthday.

It was by far the most considerate thing anyone had done in years. Roy could ask as many questions as he wanted to after, becoming more focused on unbuttoning the front of Edward's uniform. The conceited little runt dared to lean in; lips brushing against his ear as Ed started unfastening the collar of Roy's jacket. It wasn't like he had been fantasizing of the smart-mouthed Alchemist lying back and taking it with obscenely loud moaning . . . well, he had done so a few times before, but reality was always very different from what he expected.

Roy made sure to savor the moment, even if he did tear the offensive clothing off Edward's shoulders. The Full Metal Alchemist still had a trim, flat chest, hardened muscle that came along with carrying the weight of auto-mail. Roy had to wonder how he could have been fooled for a second by the older Elric brother, cursing the miniskirt that had managed to fool him so well. There was still terrible scarring at Edward's collarbone and armpit, becoming thicker and darker until the metal docking port cut off his skin. The auto-mail gleamed in the afternoon sunlight coming through the windows, inhuman and foreign. The metal shined so bright it would have almost ruined the mood . . . if the lighting didn't do a damn good job of bringing out the highlights in Edward's hair and the soft glow of his skin.

Roy 's hands moved of their own accord, pulling out the pigtails until the length of it was falling around Edward's shoulders. Roy knew damn well that most women would kill to have hair so fine and smooth, unable to stop his fingers from running through it. How many times had he wanted to grab that braid and haul the Full Metal Alchemist back into his office when the whelp tried to run off after getting the last word in? Who would have been able to guess that Edward Elric would have been able to grow up into such an attractive adult? Roy had assumed that Ed's foul attitude would have kept him out of any other lover's arms- had sat around and waited until Edward right up disappeared from his reach.

It had truly felt like Edward all but died on that chaotic day when the war finally reached a climax . . . simply because Roy had stubbornly refused to accept the fact that the oldest Elric might have actually managed to get himself killed this time.

"You selfish little punk. Do you have any fucking idea how worried I was?" Roy managed to growl out, ignoring how hard his hands were digging into Edward's arms. He didn't even remember grabbing a hold of the boy; but just had to feel him, smell him, make sure that this wasn't another hallucination brought on by his own guilt and misery. Roy wasn't about to admit to any sleepless nights spent drinking himself into a stupor- because thinking about all the possibilities that could have befallen the Full Metal Alchemist while sober made Roy physically ill.

But, then again, Edward Elric was alive and standing before Roy with two natural legs, barely anything hidden by that miniskirt. He looked better than fine, a few years doing the Elric more good than anyone could have guessed. Not that he was doing any better in the height department, but his face and cheekbones were more developed, childish fat fading away to defined muscles and bones structure.

Roy couldn't even put into words how perfect Edward's nose was.

"Bitch at me all you want later," the boy ordered softly, fingers dancing along the waist of Roy's pants. It had been so long since anyone had dared to talk back to him, to give him any sort of attitude after becoming the Fuhrer . . . and even longer since he had been able to feel human enough to actually want to have sex. Now, his pants were becoming so tight that he could hardly see straight, leaning down to smother Edward's lips with his own. He didn't even know how rough he was being until the Full Metal Alchemist's legs hit against the edge of a sofa and they both went tumbling down. There was a small grunt from Edward, the only sign of discomfort from the blonde before resuming in sucking on Roy's lower lip. He didn't know how Edward could have figured out that little trick, but it was more than enough to drive Roy up the wall.

"Shit . . . I missed you," Roy spoke honestly with his subordinate for the first time. It had been utter hell without the brat there to give him sarcastic rebuttals, never cowed into obedience like the fools running around in the military now. The boy had always been there to slam down on Roy at the slightest mistake, even worse than Riza when he put his mind to it. As infuriating as that attitude had been, the Full Metal Alchemist's absence had been enough to remind Roy exactly why he'd kept the Elric brother around.

It wasn't because of Edward's undeniable genius or his little brother's mysterious condition; he'd fallen in love at first sight, when he'd finally responded to a near-illegible letter that turned out to be nothing more than a child's scrawl. Edward had been wrapped up in bandages, nothing but stubs for two missing limbs, and was still coherent enough to catch his offer about become a State-certified Alchemist. It was rare enough to find a child that could read and write so far out into the countryside, but to find a boy that had already attempted Human Transmutation was beyond imagination.

Roy didn't have words to explain how impressively unique Edward Elric was. He didn't bother with trying to undress the smug little bastard, just flipped the skirt up over Ed's waist to show off the petite, pretty and lacey panties underneath. The alchemist really had gone all out on this charade, and Roy couldn't be more grateful. His hand was already sliding up the inside of Edward's thigh, cupping the hefty bulge that was trying to fall out from constrictive underwear. The Full Metal Alchemist was already hot to the touch down there, stiffening and twitching around in anticipation. It was quite possible that the brat wasn't as experienced as Roy had first thought, thumbing a line down the covered hard-on.

He finally got a reaction from that. Edward's hips jerked up from the stimulation, making a muffled grunt underneath Roy's mouth. He only pushed in further, pressing his heavier weight onto Edward until the blonde finally broke free the kiss- gasping for air like a drowning man. Roy hadn't even realized how forceful he was being until Ed managed to get some room between them. Tan limbs were spread out underneath him, a heavy mechanical hand bruising his upper arm. It slowly came to Roy that Edward was almost completely naked while he still had his boots and pants on . . . along with the eye patch.

Edward hadn't been around after the battle calmed down to something that resembled sanity. He didn't know the story behind Roy's latest badge of war, physically imprinted onto his face. It was the first time he'd been wounded in such a way. The disfigurement had forced Roy to realize just how damn vain he'd been over the years, taking his handsome features for granted until he'd lost a near half of them.

Roy squared up his shoulders, moving away ever so slightly on the couch; enough distance for him to not be emotional. Edward seemed to catch hint of the seriousness, pulling himself up with a loud creak in his auto-mail. The blonde at least had the mind to sit up and look him in the face, though he didn't seem to much care for his own nudity.

"Are you sure that you're alright with this?" Roy had to ask it, looking Edward straight in the face as he pulled down the eye patch. He watched as that golden gaze was drawn to the scarring. Roy was lucky that the lead had gotten embedded in his skull before actually going into his brain. He might not yet be fully recovered with small twitches caused by damaged nerves, but Roy was an expert on hiding weaknesses. He could still stare Edward down, waiting for the horrified reaction that was sure to follow. Even Riza hadn't been able to keep the shock from her face when the bandages had first come off.

Edward smirked. Without even saying a word or twitching an eyelid- he just grinned at Roy like he was dealing with an extremely slow child. Edward closed the distance between them rather quickly, silently climbing over Roy's lap to plant his lips on top of the permanently closed eyelid.

The skin had been damaged, but the nerves were still working properly- in fact, they were sending electric shock through his head. The soft pressure of Edward's kiss slowly let up before Roy even had a chance to recover. He could only sit there in complete oblivion with Edward perched on top of his thighs.

"You've got to kidding if you think this would gross me out," the Full Metal Alchemist rolling his artificial shoulder for good measure. Roy was left with his mouth hanging open. The most obvious answer had been right in front of him the whole time, and it had never once come to mind. Of course a little facial scarring wouldn't repulse Edward. He had lost both an arm and a leg to Equivalent Trade, mangling his body in impossible ways that didn't even compare to Roy's own wounds.

He buried his face into Edward's shoulder, wrapping his arms around the smaller frame and crushing the blonde to his chest. He inhaled the flowery perfume and the basic scent underneath, of the warm, human body that wasn't another bad dream brought on by too much alcohol. Only Edward was able to upset his balance like this. No other person, be them past superior officers or old flings, had managed to get so thoroughly underneath his skin. He could actually get pissed off at the boy, or worry himself senseless; depending on how trying Edward was being at the moment. Very few people even dared to test his patience like that, but Ed did it on every possible occasion.

Eventually, his hands managed to drift down the bony expanse of Edward's spine, past the divot of his hips, and began kneading the fleshy globes of his ass. It was a dream come true. Roy was barely able to hold himself in, wondering when the oldest Elric had become so developed. Unlike the rounded curves of a woman, the Full Metal Alchemist was nothing but flat muscle. A few of his bones still protruded out, enough for Roy to grab hold of and clench tightly. Edward had no idea how long it had been since he'd been able to admit this sort of need for another person, so trained to the ideal of an unshakable Fuhrer.

Roy went still, hunched over Edward's shoulder even though the blonde was sitting on top of his lap. He knew Edward would be upset if he knew how much Roy had come to adore that short, compact figure. Roy just liked how Edward could conform to his own body . . . small enough to still hug and protect from the rest of the world, except there was nothing but muscle and metal underneath criminally smooth skin.

Edward obviously grew tired of being slowly suffocated against his chest, making a few muffled protests before he outright pushed Roy away. He couldn't quite recover from the shock, wondering if he could have possibly done something to offend- . . . and found himself left without a proper defense as Edward's mouth pressed against his forehead. He was kissing the wrinkles there for no reason at all, a hand threading through his hair and tilting Roy's head back to an angle that Edward preferred. Roy was more than content to let the blonde take charge as Ed dropped back down to his mouth and continue their kiss from before.

The Full Metal Alchemist could be aggressive as well, drawing Roy into his own pace without thinking. He finally let his finger drift downward, past the small crevice of flesh and into a waiting hole. The blonde was hot inside, once Roy got past the dry resistance of muscle. Soft and wet beyond any woman; the tightness of the Full Metal Alchemist's anus around his knuckle was enough to make Roy drip against the fabric of his pants. Edward made a few hitching breaths of irritation, obviously uncomfortable but refusing to say so. He didn't know if he would be able to restrain himself any more, about to force himself on the blonde without another consideration fo-

"Oh, damn, I nearly forgot!" Edward cried out suddenly, jumping away from Roy without any notice. The little shit didn't seem to care about his bare, untanned butt as he began to randomly kick at the discarded clothing on the floor. Edward was unpredictably caught up in finding something, leaving Roy with his hands still around the air where the blonde should have been.

He seriously considered hitting the Full Metal Alchemist.

Edward didn't have the slightest clue to how easily he'd ruined the mood, finally making a noise of triumph as he snatched up his jacket. Something was pulled out of a pocket before Edward spun around; hiding whatever it was behind his back. That motion made heavy balls and a semi-aroused cock flop about below slightly darker golden curls . . . swinging with a hypnotic power that only grew worse as Ed began to walk back to him.

Roy tried to remember that he was angry with the blonde, gaze locked down at his crotch. Roy hadn't taken the time to really look before, too caught up in his own passion, but now he noticed that Edward was certainly well endowed. It was like some sad, bizarre compensation for the poor kid never being able to make it past five feet tall.

When Edward finally came close enough, Roy was already stretching out his hand without thinking. He easily palmed up the thick shaft, fingers clasping the underside of Edward's genitals. Roy squeezed gently, wishing to feel the soft and wrinkled skin, test the weight . . . but, above all, make Edward's breath hitch and cause an irrepressible blush on that usually arrogant face. No matter what may have happened in the years that Edward had disappeared, but Roy could still be confident that he had much, much, MUCH more experience than the little brat. He had the complaint list of official papers to prove it.

So, he was quite ready when Edward's knees trembled before finally giving out. He guided the Full Metal Alchemist down to land on top of his thigh, straddling his leg pleasantly. Edward was still caught up in his own body's reaction, hips jerking into his hand instinctively. Both hands caught down on his leg, one made of unforgiving metal. Roy didn't mind about the painful aching that was sure to turn into bruising tomorrow. He cared more about thumbing a line along Edward's penis, enjoying the way the blonde twisted about. Roy had never actually been in control of the Full Metal Alchemist before, so he was determined to enjoy every moment of this.

Edward finally made a weak little purr, obviously trying to stay completely mute and failing miserable. Roy laughed softly at that, pressing the tip of his thumbnail into the little ridge of flesh around the twitching head. Edward fell forward against his chest at that, hauling himself up along Roy's leg until he was close enough to bury his face into his neck. Wet lips attached to his shoulder, distracting him for a moment-

The blonde struck like a cat, his hand snapping down to the front of Roy's pants and ripping the fly open. Rou couldn't help but make a surprised grunt, hunching down as Edward pulled out his own erection. The little snot had the nerve to put a knee up onto the couch, hoisting himself up as if that was all it would take for sex between two men. Roy might not have much knowledge on the particulars, but there was definitely a need for some kind of lubricant.

"W-wait a second . . . let me think of something," Roy halted, miserably realizing he just couldn't take Edward dry, even if he had already stretched the boy out somewhat. He lifted his hand up to his mouth, wondering if licking his fingers might do the trick before Edward caught his arm. The blonde shook his head with yet another smirk on his face, wondering just what it could be this fucking time.

Edward pulled up Roy's now-limp hand, depressingly away from his crotch. Roy was wondering if he just might have gone too far this time, but he was surprised again . . . as if the oldest Elric had made a sport out of constantly keeping him confused and off-guard.

A brand new package of lube was slapped into his hand, accompanied with an even larger smile than before. Roy could honestly say that he had never seen Edward look so happy before, emotions finally reaching those deep, golden eyes.

" . . . I love you so much," Roy had never been choked up with emotion before, actually finding it hard to talk.

"Blah, blah, blah. Let's get busy," Edward shut him up quickly, waving at the air like he could brush away every single worry. The idiot always acted without considering the consequences. If he did, Edward would have never ended up with mechanical implants for his limbs. Roy shook his head, unable to keep from smirking at his own foolishness. He kept on underestimating the blonde, and now he actually had a chance to make it up to Edward . . . an opportunity Roy thought he had lost long ago.

He had to kiss Edward first as a reward for being able to surprise him time and time again. This was by far the best damn birthday present he'd ever gotten. Roy had to run a hand through his hair, cupping the back of his neck to tilt Edward's head back for a better angle. His tongue was in that warm, velvety mouth before Roy even thought about it, just focusing on tasting Edward's own lips and saliva.

Edward wrapped both arms around Roy's shoulders, hauling his lithe body up along Roy's leg until their erections brushed against each other. They both hissed at that, breathing into each others' mouths at the simple closeness.

Roy left Edward responsible for supporting himself, since both hands were required for twisting off the tricky cap for the lube. He managed to open it up behind Edward's head, messily squeezing out large globs onto his fingers. Some dripped down onto the blonde's back as well, but neither of them really seemed to notice at the time. He tossed the crumpled metal tube aside, already tracing a greasy line down to the cleft of Edward's buttocks.

It was strangely rewarding to finally slide an explorative finger inside the Full Metal Alchemist. How long had he imagined having this sort of power over the oldest living Elric? It wasn't like Edward didn't call it upon himself with stupid stunts time and time again . . . like using drag as disguise to sneak into the heart of military intelligence and have sex. Roy would have suspected this was all nothing more than a dream, if Edward's muscles were clenching so tightly around his knuckle in stark contrast to the warm and soft inner skin.

Edward made a small, mewling yelp against his chest, jerking forward when Roy brushed against some unknown spot. He was already adding a second finger, beginning to worry that he might not be able to hold himself in. Roy refused to think about it any more, no matter how much the blood was rushing to his loins. He would have Edward properly or not at all, concentrating on stretching out the resisting flesh surrounding his fingers.

Hot and sticky moisture began forming on Roy's stomach. He had to look down to confirm that it was Edward, sperm starting to leak from an engorged head. That, along with the flush covering Ed's cheeks and the dazed, stupefied golden eyes locked on his own was enough to tell Roy that the blonde was finally ready. He pulled out, using the sloppy mess left behind on his hand to coat his own erection. He kept his palm underneath the pulsing organ, using his other arm to hoist Edward up even further.

Roy guided his erection into the loosened ring of Edward's anus, only to find more opposition further in. He had to clench his eyes against the painful cry Edward made.

No matter how much he tried, there would still be the initial hurt of entry. Roy whispered a promise that it would get better while he continued to lower Edward down. He was lying, and Edward knew it, but was still managing to grit his teeth and clench his eyes shut. The heavy weight of Edward's own body suddenly dropped down onto Roy's lap, thighs giving out in one quick motion. He wondered for a moment if Edward had just thought it better to get the worst over with, grunting and choking in an obvious attempt to keep from crying out.

Then, Roy was completely encompassed by the feeling of Edward being wrapped around the most sensitive organ on his body. Tight, pulsating flesh was pressing against every part of Roy's cock, buttocks settled nicely on top of his balls. His fingers dug into the back Edward's hips, forcing the blonde to stay there as Roy simply enjoyed the sensations, like the minute trembling that was running down Edward's spine. The impressively fine gold of the Full Metal Alchemist's eyelashes. The way his whole body clenched around his dick with every drawn-out pant.

He had to grab at Edward's hair and crush their lips together yet again. Apparently Edward had the same thought, because their tongues clashed together and began to fight it out for dominance. Roy wasn't about to be outdone by some naïve pup, one that he'd witnessed going through an agonizing slow maturity along with voice changes and a tendency to grow a splotchy bit of facial hair if he got too caught up in studying some archaic volumes in the library. His other hand absent-mindedly went to the forgotten erection that had been slapping against his stomach for quite some time now.That caused an immediate reaction; a loud whine up into Roy's mouth, knees tightening against his hips as Edward rose to meet him. The blonde was much more sensitive there, genitals or not. He'd been managing to do a good job of restraining himself up until now. But, when Roy had his fingers wrapped about the length of Edward's penis and his thumb resting over the head, the blonde seemed unable to do anything beyond rubbing his whole body against Roy's. Damn it all to hell if the brat wasn't trying to turn him on with that movement.

Edward lifted himself up ever so slightly, thighs and shoulders trembling as he almost managed to pull off of Roy's heated erection . . . than slammed right back down, grinding his pelvis into Roy's hips. The Full Metal Alchemist finally screamed aloud at his own actions, shuddering before he easily came to his own climax. Hot and sticky sperm spilled out between their groins, Edward sliding forward limply.

Roy would have assumed that the blonde would have had more stamina, but he found the sudden lack of resistance strangely endearing. He grabbed at Edward's ass yet again, determined to ride the boy out to completion. There was only warm and supple opposition- the simple shape of Edward's insides not yet accustomed to his own girth.

If this had been with a woman, Roy would have tried to be more gentle, slow down just in case he might be hurting his partner. But, this was the eldest living Elric left; certainly more than used to a little bit of pain. Roy was sure he was leaving bruises on the blonde's skin, holding on with desperation born of years of not knowing where Edward had been. Roy wasn't going to let go so easily, ever again, no matter how much he might hurt Edward. The Full Metal Alchemist didn't even cry out when Roy ejaculated deep inside his guts, clenching his arms around Edward's backside.

He stayed there panting heavily over the blonde's shoulder, keeping his flaccid organ buried up inside Edward. Roy couldn't even believe it was over already, dreaming of this exact moment for so long that he didn't quite know what to do now. It certainly hadn't matched up with many of his fantasies, except the part with the miniskirt and pigtails . . .

"Why do you have to be so much damn trouble?" Roy sighed, shaking his head against Edward's warm and sweaty shoulder. There wasn't an answer from the boy, seeming content to just daze against him. All Edward needed was to start purring to be the epitome of a happy cat. Roy considered getting angry with the selfish and inconsiderate Alchemist . . . and then just squeezed his arms tighter around Edward. Just a few days ago, he wouldn't have even thought it possible for the brat to be alive. Not that he would admit to having such little hope.

Roy felt like a huge weight had been lifted, having the peace of mind to actually just sit there and stroke Edward's hair. He could honestly say he had gotten everything he'd wanted for his birthday for the first time in his life.

He finally had to pull himself away from Edward's shoulder, glancing down at the floor to find his jacket. Roy slipped a foot underneath the coat and lifted it up a bit . . . stretching out an arm to grab at it awkwardly. Edward grunted his displeasure at getting squashed even further against Roy's chest, rolling down to escape. Roy made quick business of fishing out a packet of matches and carton of cigarettes from the side pocket, tossing the jacket away before it could possibly get in the way.

At least Edward didn't seem too displeased with the interruption; probably because Roy was a little bit more tactful about it than the Full Metal Alchemist had been only minutes ago. He hadn't been displeased with Edward for thoughtfully bringing lubrication, but the arrogant brat had gone about it in a way that had nearly destroyed the mood. Now that the passion of the moment was gone and Roy wasn't so scared that this Edward was only a figment of his imagination, he wanted a nice stick of nicotine after such a mind-blowing experience.

Edward still was silent, showing a bit of maturity in the aftermath of their lovemaking. He palmed up his hair, scooping the bulk of it around his neck before settling down on Roy's lap. Edward's shoulders stuck to the mess left behind on his thighs and groin, but the blonde didn't seem to care about it in the slightest. He just grabbed one of Roy's arms and forced it over his shoulder, making a simple cushion of the military's Fuhrer.

Roy shook his head at that daring attitude, actually beginning to feel his age as he remembered all the times Edward had completely ignored the authority he was supposed to have. It was nostalgic as all hell, except for the fact he had finally managed to get Edward exactly how he'd wanted. Maes was probably laughing it up in Heaven right now for Roy taking so damn long in the first place.

All the deep thinking and regretting only made the cigarette taste better when Roy finally lit up. He leaned back against the couch, closing his eyes and simply appreciating the warm weight Edward made against his body. His hand was already absently running along the boy's shoulder and the small divots his ribs made along his chest . . . secretly assuring himself that Edward was still there. He just might be old enough to start going senile, having too many delusions of this very same situation before to be convinced.

"I could go for one too, right about now," Edward suggested in no uncertain terms, waving his hand underneath the drifting smoke.

Roy raised an eyebrow at the naked blonde sprawled out across his legs, easily managing to snap him back to reality with only a few words. He didn't know if he should be surprised or not that Edward had started smoking. There was certainly worse that the Full Metal Alchemist could do, but Roy's protectiveness of the blonde had suddenly doubled. Sex could do that to a man, especially when he had been wanting it for so damn long.

"You can't smoke. It's bad for you," Roy answered back, ignoring the contradiction he made as he kept on inhaling. Edward's brows instantly came together, scowling up at him in familiar irritation. Roy couldn't help enjoying himself. It had been so long since he'd gotten a chance to tease the infamous Full Metal Alchemist, always finding Edward's reactions rather amusing.

"Then, you shouldn't smoke either," Edward stated the obvious with a dark frown. His lips were making a hard line of displeasure, but it was offset by the fact they were turning a dark red from being kissed too hard.

"This is my birthday, after all. I can do what I damn well please," Roy reminded him. Edward grumbled out something under his breath, snapping his face away in disgust. All Roy could catch was something about a dirty old man and his stamina, and he could easily guess that Edward hadn't meant it in flattering terms.

"I will have you take that back," Roy demanded, letting his fingers tighten on the fleshy ring of Edward's nipple. There was a visible jerk along his body, but otherwise the Full Metal Alchemist managed to keep grinning despite the stimulation.

"Just try and make me," Edward shot back arrogantly, eyes twinkling with further mischievous. Roy was more than ready to meet the challenge, smashing out the cigarette on the low table. Edward made a small protest at the waste, obviously still after a little a bit of nicotine, but he really couldn't really say anything. Not when Roy was already back and kissing Edward just as passionately as before.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I tried to make up for lost time. I really did. There's enough fanservice in here to kill a man (or woman), so I can only hope that works out nicely for an apology. DevineWaterDragon and Alphonze get major props for being on my ass at least once a month since the last chapter. That kind of hounding does get the job done. And, of course, undying gratitude to my muse Iie Nome for reading through the sex scene for errors. Otherwise, I just pretty much took the animeverse and mutilated it to my own liking. Jyan!

But, last but not least, you for reading this.

Fanfiction is made possible by people like you.

All you haters can go eat a dick.

Lots of Improper Lovin' for my readers!

The Gher