Of Wagging Tails and Sniffing Butts

Chapter 5:

Oh, Howie!


A/N: Dude. I'm home sick today, but dude. The radio just went off . . . and it's 12:30, and I like freaked out . . . AND THEY'RE PLAYING 'CREEP'! . . . and yeah

I'm weird today . . . so just read the friggin story . . .


Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN TEEN TITANS! Or . . . Anything, really.



Later that night, the doggy whom had been abused by evil Adonis arrived at its destination - Titan's Tower. The canine bounded up to the front door, scratching repeatedly with its nails on the metal surface, which kind of would have hurt human and doggy ears.

The scratching echoed throughout the tower, and Raven, who was laying across Beast Boy's lap on the sofa, immediately sat up abruptly, ears perked. The introvert began barking loudly, which terrified the napping Beast Boy (who had been napping) awake, causing him to shove Rae off of him.

"It's probably just a squirrel," he told her in a grumble, rubbing his eyes. "Go back to bed."

But Raven refused to let her bark die down. She ran around in a circle, barking and yipping repeatedly. Eventually, which was a few minutes later, Beast Boy realized that Raven WASN'T going to give up, so to prove to her that there was 'no one' there, he stood, scooping her up into his arms.

"You're so stubborn," he muttered, stroking her silky fur. Raven almost purred, which would have been very out of place for a dog, and he ran downstairs, clutching the dog.

"You're so deaf," Raven replied, rolling her eyes. "I definitely heard something down there." Her eyes bugged out of her head as she licked her nose and whiskers hungrily. "A male dog."

"You could detect all of that just from . . .?" Beast Boy's eyebrows arched.

"No, you retard. I still have some of my powers in this form, like my empathy. So I kinda could tell who was out there . . . and now it's obvious because the damned scratching is getting louder and piercing my ears and can YOU PLEASE JUST GET THE FUCKING DOOR?"

"Right, right . . ." Beast Boy pressed the button on the side of the door, opening it up automatically. A golden retriever stood there, wagging its tail, barking. (Yes, the golden retriever was the doggy that pizzled all over Adonis's yard and got his doggy but kicked)

"Uh . . ." Beast Boy began, rubbing his forehead after setting Raven down on the ground. The golden retriever barked at him, whipping its tail.

" . . . Timmy's trapped in a well?" BB exclaimed, jumping. "We have to go s-"

"No, you idiot," Raven growled. "He said that he was just attacked by a . . . steroid-ed out human."

"Oh. Well in that case . . . We better bring this little guy in for some hard-core interrogation!" To punctuate this, Beast Boy slammed his right fist into his left palm, smirking. "I always wanted to do this. But it was always left to Roooobin . . . and Cyyyyborg . . . and even Starfire and you! I mean, DUDE! If anyone should do it, it should be-"

Raven tore the spandex obscuring Beast boy's leg with her incisors with a growl. "Shut up, please." Turning to the dog, she smiled sweetly and almost . . . seductively, saying, "Follow me." She turned, leading the dog upstairs into the interrogation room. The Golden Retriever's eyes turned to hearts, and it panted, following eagerly.

Beast Boy felt jealousy incinerate his insides, and he clenched his fists, stomping after the pair of dogs.


Raven's expression changed a lot during the interrogation. From glares to BB, flirtatious smiles to the Retriever, and to 'extreme thinking' contortions, it was kind of plain to see exactly what she was thinking in dog form, which is kind of ironic but true, for she hardly ever showed emotion in her human form. Probably because she had more dignity in that form.

Beast Boy was petting her back, and he hissed into her ear at one point, "You're MY girl-friend, Raven. Remember that. And that means NO FLIRTING WITH OTHER DOGS!"

Raven only barked to the other dog, who was yapping away, and finally, Beast Boy grew weary of it. He morphed into a dog, nuzzling his snout under Raven's, and smirking at the retriever.

The retriever, who revealed himself as Howie, told them of how he had once been a business executive at Wayne Enterprises, until one day he was walking home, and there was a flash of light, and suddenly, he was a doggy.

The rest of this, since all 3 of them could understand dog now, I will put in regular quotations.

"Yeah, the same thing happened to me. Except some steroided-out guy named Adonis did it," Raven told Howie.

Howie nodded. "Yeah, from your description, I think he did the same to me."

Beast Boy laid his head on the smooth interrogation table, rolling his eyes. It was bad enough having Raven be moody as a dog, but now, with this stupid retriever closing in on her, and her showing signs of WANTING him to, it was just . . . ugh. Too much for him. Raven was HIS girl-friend, and he wanted her back in human form! In dog form, she was too flirty and untrust-worthy, yet he never thought he'd be even THINKING those words about her, let alone admitting them.

"So what?" he finally growled. "You're a dog, and so is he. DEAL WITH IT!"

Raven glanced at BB. "Don't mind him, Howie. He's just . . . in heat."

"But he's a guy," Howie told her, blinkingly.

" . . . Exactly."

True, it was more amusing having Raven as a dog. She couldn't blow anything up from sudden outbursts of emotion, so she was kind of out of character and funny, and cute. But Beast Boy was determined to find a way to get her back to normal.

"Look, guys," BB said, sitting up straight. "Adonis is trying to turn the entire human race into canines. DUH! We already got past this point! We just have to figure out why!"

" . . . For power, of course," Raven told him.

"Well, yeah! But why not . . . Cats? Or Wildebeasts? Or bunny rabbits?" he questioned, rubbing his temple with his paw.

" . . . Because dogs . . . we have so many breeds . . ." Raven started, thinking.

"And we're obedient!" Beast Boy suddenly shouted, standing up. "I mean . . . DOGS are! I mean, I could change back at free will, but dogs are domesticated! So they're BRED to be obedient! That way, Adonis could tell any of us what to do, and we'd do it!"

Raven gasped. "For once, you actually made sense."

Howie was washing himself, so no comment was ever documented from him.

"Exactly! So now, we have to track him down!" Beast Boy brought his paw down hard on the table as a doggy fist.

" . . . How?" Rae asked.

BB smirked at her, and she caught on.

Both of them looked at Howie.



A/N: Blechhh . . . sorry it's so short . . . as I said, I'm not feeling well but I also have extreme w.b. for this . . .