CREDITS (quite some interesting stuff here)

Chip and Dale were created by Jack Hannah, I think.

Gadget Hackwrench, Monterey Jack, Zipper, Plato, Aldrin Klordane, and Fat Cat were created by Tad Stones and Kevin Hopps, I think.

Foxglove and Winifred were created by Bruce Talkington, I think.

Tammy, Bink, and their mother were created by Tad Stones and Dev Ross, I think.

Midge was created by Sindy McKay and Larry Swerdlove, I think.

Camembert Kate was created by Bruce Reid Schaeffer, Ken Koonce, and David Wiemers, I think.

Cheddarhead Charlie and Ditz (and his friends) were created by Mark Edens, I think.

"The Red Badger of Courage", Rat Capone, Arnold Mousenegger, and Sugar Ray Lizard were created by Michael P. Nelson and Burt Brown, I think.

Iron Goose and Queenie were created by Tad Stones and David Wise, I think.

Sureluck Jones was created by Eric Lewald, I think.

Clarissa, Chi-Chi, Lucy, Chattie, Zip and Zap, Chet, Granny Chippy, Cyril Chipmunk, Chester Chipmunk, and Gerry Squirrel (and Cyril's bull incident) were created by the writers of "Disney and Me", of whom Disney had the rudeness of not acknowledging in those comics.

Clarice and Club Acorn were created by Nick George and Bill Berg, I think.

The name "Colby" was coined by Art Cover, Lydia Marano, and Bryce Malek, I think, suggested for Monterey's last name by Carlton "Wescott" Edward Baird II.

Sparky and Buzz were created by Kevin Hopps, I think.

Harpo Mouseo was created by Dean Stefan, I think.

Chirp Sing was created by Tad Stones, I think.

Tom and Butch were created by David Wise, I think.

Sam, Sue, and Elwood were created by Lynn Barker, I think.

Canina LeFur was created by Doug Hutchinson, I think.

Melody was created by David Schwartz, I think.

Dale's workout suit (and all original wardrobe) was designed by Ken Boyer and Kenny Thompkins, I think.

The Ranger Wing, the Ranger Plane, the Ranger Skate, and Ditz's spaceship was designed by Rob Laduca and Terry Hudson, I think.

All characters are © Disney (and used without permission, but it's doubtful that they mind) EXCEPT FOR:

Otis and Uncle Phinehas, and the *Fur and Feather Journal and Picayune*, who are © Roy Neal Grissom, who also conceived the armadillo thing, the luna moth thing, Foxglove's Steeple, part of the Park Incident, the language thing, the theories concerning Foxglove's past, Fat Cat's Letter, Dale and Foxglove's Greeting, Foxglove's Worst Insult, Foxglove's Original Final Moments, the "A Elbereth Gilthoniel!" reference, and Dale's Original Proposal. Used with permission.

Pierre and Dalee Oakmont, Chap and Nikoma Maplewood, Tac, Clark Jent, Feyyanna, Janice, Marcus, Richard, Rosie, Dusk, Dawn, Curtis, Grace, Leticia, Irene, Dawn, Aurora, Alicia, the *Vegas Furries*, The Nutshell, the squirrel emcee, Mortimer, Clarice's Band, Kyle, Dr. Qandlier and his wife, Dr. Johanna, the chipmunk cub, Strigidæ/Ima, the prairie dog bouncers, Dr. Jay, Tyndal, Anna, James, and the bellhop, who are © The J.A.M.

Mulder and Scully, who are © 20th Century Fox. Used without permission.

Luke Skywalker, Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader, Han Solo, The *Millennium Falcon*, and "The Empire Strikes Back", who are © Lucasfilm. Used without permission.

"An American Tail", which is © Amblin Entertainment. Used without permission.

Rocky Balboa, who is © Metro-Goldwin-Mayer/United Artists. Used without permission.

Captain Jean-Luc Picard, who is © Paramount Pictures. Used without permission.

Sergeant Slaughter, who is © Hasbro. Used without permission.

Bernard, Bianca, and The Rescue Aid Society, who are © Margery Sharp. Used without permission.

and Godzilla, who is © Toho. Used without permission.

Original casting by Olivia Miner.

Additional casting by The J.A.M. and Roy Neal Grissom.


Chip Maplewood
Dale Oakmont
Gadget Hackwrench
Monterey Jack Colby
Zipper Lightringer
Foxglove Oakmont

Pierre Oakmont
Dalee Oakmont
Chap Maplewood
Nikoma Maplewood
Cheddarhead Charlie
Camembert Katie
Tammy Hazelnut
Midge
Phinehas Maplewood
Otis
Clark Jent
Clarice Tamiassara
Feyyanna
Janice
Marcus
Richard
Rosie
Curtis
Grace
Dusk
Dawn
Sparky
Buzz
Squirrel emcee
Mortimer
Winifred
Rat Capone
Arnold Mousenneger
Sugar Ray Lizard
Dr. Qandlier
Harpo Mouseo
The chipmunk cub
Dr. Johanna
Strigidæ/Ima
Chirp Sing
Chattie
James
Zip
Zap
Granny Chippy
Chet
Sam
Sue
Elwood
Canina LeFur
Mrs. Hazelnut
Bink
Melody
Queenie
Kyle
Bianca
Bernard
Chester
Chi-Chi
Lucy
Cyril
Clarissa
Gerry

and

The Bellhop

is
is
is also
is
is also
is

is
is
is
is
is also
is
is also
is also
is also
is also
is
is
is also
is also
is
is also
is
is
is
is
is
is
is also
is
is
is also
is also
is also
is
is
is
is also
is also
is
is also
is also
is also
is also
is also
is
is also
is
is also
is
is
is also
is also
is
is
is
is
is
is also
is
is
is
is
is

is

Tress MacNeille
Corey Burton
Tress MacNeille
Jim Cummings
Corey Burton
Deborah Walley

Frank Welker
B.J. Ward
Peter Cullen
Noelle North
Jim Cummings
Fran Ryan
Noelle North
Tress MacNeille
Peter Cullen
Corey Burton
Kenneth Mars
Susan Blu
Susan Blu
B.J. Ward
Marshall Efron
Frank Welker
Tara Charandoff
Brian Cummings
Cathy Cavadini
Rob Paulsen
Alyson Court
Danny Gans
Danny Gans
Dan Gilvezan
Bobcat Golthwait
Tress MacNeille
Jim Cummings
Brian Cummings
Chuck McCann
Michael Fantini
Himself
Alyson Court
Tress MacNeille
Jackie Burroughs
Jim Cummings
Cathy Cavadini
Frank Welker
Tara Charandoff
Tara Charandoff
June Foray
Chuck McCann
Josh Rodine
Josh Rodine
Pat Musick
Carol Channing
Tress MacNeille
Noelle North
Russi Taylor
Sindy McKay
Henry Gibson
Eva Gabor
Bob Newhart
Henry Gibson
Louise Vallance
Pauline Renniee
Hal Smith
Jennifer Darling
Alan Oppenheimer

The J.A.M


Additional special appearances by David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson.

Additional wardrobe designed by The J.A.M.

Props by Tinker-Toys.

Some ærial manœuvers were suggested by The E.Q.U.I.N.N.O.X. (a student of mine).

Hotel accommodations by Hyatt Regency Cancún Furry Division.

The name Maplewood was coined by Michael "Questy" Demcio.

The name Oakmont was coined by Michael "Questy" Demcio with collaboration from Jeff Pierce and Meghan Elizabeth Brunner.

The names Lightringer and Hazelnut were coined by Natasha Kashefipour.

The name Tamiassara was coined by The J.A.M.

The Mohawk names: Segoleh (he who laughs), Yegoleh (she who laughs), and Hastahah (he who grieves), were coined by The J.A.M. with collaboration from Kevin "KS" Sharbaugh.

Small Mammal Health Consultant: John W. Nowak.

Weather Consultant: John W. Nowak.

Io Consultant: John W. Nowak.

The Dale-hanging-from-his-ankles thing was also originally conceived by John W. Nowak.

The Sparky-and-Buzz-at-MIT thing was originally conceived by Michael "Questy" Demcio.

Foxglove's flashback with Winifred, and the "hardball" quote were originally conceived and written by Bruce Talkington.

The New Zealand incident was originally conceived and written by Julia J. Roberts.

The South America incident, and Gadget's quote, were originally conceived and written by Dev Ross and Tad Stones.

The Paris incident, and Gadget's quote there as well, were originally conceived and written by Dean Stephan, Ken Koonce, and David Wiemers.

The super spy reference was originally conceived by Julia J. Roberts and Tad Stones.

Gadget's original run-in with the FBI was originally conceived by Robert "Robo|\|erd" Hollinshead.

The quotes from "Rocky" were originally conceived and written by Sylvester Stallone.

Some of the choreography for "Born To Be Alive" was suggested by The R.R.O.S.I.E. and The C.A.T.M.A.N.

Hebrew consultant: Roy Neal Grissom (you're one of the good ones, Mr. Grissom!!!)

Both of Foxglove's kidnappings were originally conceived and written by Roy Neal Grissom.

Gadget's Cabinet, Translator, Elevator, and Foxglove's Original Short Wave Radio were designed by Roy Neal Grissom.

Foxglove's New Digital Short Wave Radio was designed by The J.A.M.

The Ceremony was also originally designed and orchestrated by Roy Neal Grissom. Additional orchestrations by The J.A.M.


"In My Arms Again" is © 1998 Milene Music, Inc./Deer Valley Music (administered by Milene Music, Inc.)/ASCAP/Lil' Yeila House Music/BMI/Lola Max Music/ASCAP. Written by Michael W. Smith, Joanna Carlson, and Cindy Morgan. Performed by Michael W. Smith. Orchestrated and conducted by Tom Howard. Programming and Keyboards by Michael W. Smith and Bryan Lenox. Guitars by Brent Barcus. Used without permission.

"Somewhere Out There" is © 1986 MCA Records. Written by Cynthia Weil. Music by James Horner and Barry Mann (Grammy Best Song in a Movie Soundtrack 1987!). Performed by Corey Burton and Deborah Walley. Used without permission.

"Desesperada" (Desperate Woman) is © 1994 Polygram Latino Records. Written by Steve Singer and A. Roberts. Adapted by Carlos Toro Montoro. Performed by Martha Sánchez. Used without permission.

"My Destiny" is © 1950 Mack David (lyrics) and Jerry Livingston (music). Popularised by Billy Eckstine. Performed by Tress MacNeille, Corey Burton, and Susan Blu. Used without permission.

"Little Girl" is © 1931 Madeline Hyde and Francis Henry. Popularised by Guy Lombardo. Performed by Tress MacNeille, Corey Burton, and Susan Blu. Used without permission.

"Every Breath You Take" is © 1983 A&M Records. Written by Sting (Grammy Best Song 1983!). Performed by Corey Burton. Used without permission.

"I Want To Know What Love Is" is © 1984 Atlantic Records. Written by Mick Jones. Performed by Susan Blu, Tress MacNeille, Cathy Cavadini, B.J. Ward, Rob Paulsen, Frank Welker, Peter Cullen, and Corey Burton. Used without permission.

"Just Another Day" is © 1992 SBK Records. Written by Jon Secada and Miguel A. Morejón. Performed by Deborah Walley, Tress MacNeille, Susan Blu, Cathy Cavadini, B.J. Ward, Rob Paulsen, Frank Welker, Peter Cullen, and Corey Burton. Used without permission.

"Total Eclipse Of The Heart" is © 1983 Columbia Records. Written by Jim Steinman. Performed by Deborah Walley, Tress MacNeille, Susan Blu, Peter Cullen, and Corey Burton. Used without permission.

"End And Credit Theme" (Theme of Indiana Jones) is © 1983 Polydor. Written by John Williams. Performed by Corey Burton. Used without permission.

"Born To Be Alive" is © 1979 Radmus Publishing. Written and performed by Patrick Hernandez. Used without permission.

"Theme of Big Red" is © 1982 Wrigley's. Who knows who wrote it. Performed by the entire cast. Used without permission.

"Wind Beneath My Wings" is © 1988 Atlantic Records. Written by Jeff Silbar and Larry Henley. Performed by Corey Burton. Used without permission.

"My Heart Will Go On" is © 1997 Sony Classical Records. Written by Will Jennings. Music by James Horner. Performed by Deborah Walley, Tress MacNeille, and Peter Cullen. Used without permission.

"(I've Had) The Time Of My Life" is © 1987 RCA Records. Written by Donald Markowitz, John De Nicola, and Frankie Previte. Performed by Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes. Used without permission.

"When A Man Loves A Woman" is © 1991 Columbia Records. Written by C. Lewis and A. Wright. Performed by Michael Bolton. Used without permission.

No copyright infringement is intended or implied. I did all this for the fun of it.

All of the characters, places, and events portrayed in this fanfic are fictitious. Any resemblance to any real persons, places, or events is unintentional and purely coincidental. Trust me on this one, guys. Even if you feel that I took some events from Real Life (or even some fanfics other than the ones mentioned, please believe me, Indy, Mr. Silva, and Mr. Plotecher!), trust me, I wrote them down LONG before they actually happened.

SPECIAL THANKS

To Microsoft's Encyclopædia Encarta '99, for all the scientific classifications.

To Hershey's, for furnishing most of the candy used in this fanfic.

To Wrigley's.

To Roy Neal Grissom (who else), for sorta starting this whole thing off, with his fanfics: "Home Is Where You Hang Upside-Down", and "Consummation", of which I make numerous references here. I couldn't have done it without you.

To Roy Neal Grissom and John W. Nowak, for the joke material. I know I modified it a trifle, but thanks anyways.

To John W. Nowak, for taking his time in proofreading this story.

To Kevin "KS" Sharbaugh, for his assistance in providing Dale's and Foxglove's middle names.

To Christopher Silva, for his contribution: "Dale's Lament", on TESSARES - I AWOKE AND LAUGHED NO MORE. Beginning with "Do you know what it feels like to be insignificant, Chip?" to "Imagine these things and know what it is like to be Dale," that segment was originally conceived and written by him. I made some changes to allow it to flow with the story, but I know you won't mind. For the original "Dale's Lament", contact him.

To Natasha Kashefipour (I LOVE saying that name!) for all the info and pics of Clarice, Cousin Chet, Sam and Sue, and Elwood. You're the best!
KashefipourKashefipourKashefipourKashefipourKashefipour—

AHEM! To Ruslan Matvienko, also for his Clarice pics. Did you think I'd forget you?

To Carlton "Wescott" Edward Baird II, for the lyrics of the second segment of "Little Girl". I was about to put the Amy Grant lyrics ("HEY Little Girl, running out so fast…"), but you saved the day. Thanks.

To *both* Natasha Kashefipour *and* Carlton "Wescott" Edward Baird II, for their joint contribution of the lyrics of the *first* segment of "Little Girl", as well as its orchestration.

To David Junker, for the info on Chirp Sing.

To Christopher "Dale" Birkett, for all the info on Lucy, Chi-Chi, Clarissa, Cyril Chipmunk, Chester Chipmunk, Gerry Squirrel, Granny Chippy, Chattie, and Zip and Zap.

To John Alan "Q" Davidson, for the "Rocky V" quote. Thanks a bunch!

To both Matt Plotecher and Christopher "Dale" Birkett, for the voice lists.

To Christopher Silva, Matt Plotecher, and Stephen "Indy" Hamrick, for their little (but important) bits of input.

To Roy Neal Grissom (one more time), and Riga's very own, Aivars Liepa, for their owl idea and for their assistance in the various ways of saying "END".

Also to The P.E. for *his* contribution in the various ways of saying "END".

And to CD, for the correction in the origins of "My Destiny" and "Little Girl".


TREMENDOUSLY SPECIAL THANKS

To Roy Neal Grissom. You're an incredible writer as well. Thanks for the inspiration. This story would not have existed without you.

And to Natasha Kashefipour—KashefipourKashefipourKashefipourKashefipourKashefipour—AHEM! For going through land and sea to get the info I asked for, and for being an incredible friend as well.

And yes, I was counting the chapters in Greek.

Also, Chapter DODEKA - DEATH OF A DREAM is dedicated to Julie Bihn and all her disciples who so ardently follow and defend the equation: C+G=NowayJose!

And no, none of the Rescue Rangers or the hotel staff gave the Oakmonts that giant Hershey's Kiss (or the luna moths or the foxglove petals). That was a gift from…

ME!!!!!!!!!! So…

Until next time, remember:

I AM THE J.A.M.

Good evening.

[WARP!!!]