Disclaimer: Nothing. Belongs. To. Me. Okay?
You do not want to hear about this day. If I were you, I'd go right back to what you were doing and continue with it. So go ahead. Because I'm not certain I can contain myself from telling my horrendous recap of what you are supposed to call a day.
A nightmare, perhaps.
Don't say I didn't warn you…
Okay. So, I was at the station, everything's going just dandy and great, like it does every year. Right? Right. The first years are being the daft little dimwits they are wont to be (everybody was a dimwit when they were in first year. I even admit to it.). Hysteric mothers are sobbing and whatnot. The usual, right?
See, that's where you're wrong. It got much, much worse.
About fifty gazillion times worse, I would say, if that were not such a kindergarten-ish thing. (You know, with the stuck out tongue and the—I hate you times fifty gazillion bajillion so THERE!)
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. The train station.
Well, Mum of course made the tearful goodbye scene like she does without fail, year after year. But that's not the issue. I'm used to it by now. By the fifth time I had to go back and hug her AGAIN, I put my foot down and continued on to the train. (Mum still crying and waving madly in the background. Honestly, people were beginning to stare—I mean, and who could blame them?)
And who, do you guess, was boarding the exact same time as I was?
James bloody Potter.
Anyway, he was all grinning and "Evans! Long time no see!" and cheekily flirting in that particularly annoying way of his. Okay, I could ignore that, right? He followed me onto the train, and really, was I going to complain when he put my trunk away? I mean I'm trying my best to forget that last time when it (the trunk, duh) slipped out of my hands and knocked that second year unconscious…but okay, that's another story…
Urgh. This is where it really gets bad. If you want to run right away now, I would completely support your decision. Go. Shoo. I can't contain myself for much longer.
Once we enter the big hall-type thing that connects all the compartments, it happened. Oy. It hurts to write it, but I must. He catches me completely off-guard, grabs me and starts carrying me (like his hands are under my back and under the crook of my knees, places I washed most thoroughly in the shower—they were bright red from being scrubbed when I was done with them) through the bustling hall. People are staring. And I don't blame them. Because, do you know why they would have reason to stare?
Well, now you will know. If it wasn't bad enough he was carrying me about like an idiot. He played this tape that was about was about the loudest thing you ever heard. It was blasting and practically blowing everybody's eardrums off. And do you know what it was saying, what EVERYBODY was hearing, in a loud, annoying voice?
Lil-yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy….. Lil-yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy…………………..will you go out with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?
It went on like that for some time. I was mortified. It was the loudest, most embarrassing thing ever! I must have literally become a beet. It's not difficult, seeing my hair. I wouldn't be surprised if I just heard a loud pop! And James would be holding a freakishly large beet in my place with some red hair sticking out of the top.
Or just some carrot sticks, maybe, in my hair's place. Great! Now I'm turning into a freaking salad! Slap some balsamic vinegar on and everything. Just what I always aspired to in life, to be a salad...really, it's great….
Before I turned into a live beet, I quickly jumped angrily out of his (stupid, stupid, stupid!) arms. And I ran, ran away to the compartment that I, Minnie and Tessa stay in every year. It has even surpassed my most embarrassing moments by far! (Namely the time when I was in first year, and was sat on by a large, large seventh year because I was too small to see…spent the whole year with horrible bruises all over me) And he thought it was romantic.
Well, I have news for him. He couldn't get less romantic if he TRIED!
Minnie and Tessa tried to console me but to no avail. I locked the door to the compartment to so nobody could come in. (We could hear Potter banging on the door for at least an hour… I am not going to give him any satisfaction of talking to him! No, I am not. Not after he embarrassed me out of my wits…)
After dinner I ran up here, to my lovely bed, and now lying under the covers, lest anybody should see me. Lovely, lovely bed. It's the only thing that won't annoyingly burst into song—"Lihhhleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…..will you go out with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee", as some annoying are annoyingly doing.
I probably am still blushing. Just to put the darned cherry on top. Why couldn't I have been born like, a blonde, or a brunette at least? People who don't blush every other minute in their lives? Like me. Oh, those lucky people. They don't realize how very fortunate they are...
Waking up at 5:30 so as to eat breakfast alone. With nobody repeating that irritating song at me again! Nobody should be up at this ungodly hour except for those disgraced by the annoying James Potter. Well, I suppose there'll be a whole crowd of people at breakfast then…oh great, I get to eat breakfast with Snape…what I've always dreamed of.
Not quite as bad as all that. Although there are, like, two other people in the great hall. Happily, Snape is not one of them. No offense to him but he does smell a bit on the greasy turnip-ish side…am sitting alone. Reading Hogwarts, a History. You really can't read it enough times, it, after all, is 1,659 pages…
The boy just can't leave me alone. No, he just can't. I was innocently eating my jam and toast (it has to be blackberry-apricot, luckily the house elves make it fresh every day. Because otherwise I would have to combine the two separate flavors, and they don't taste nearly as good that way…anyway, back to my story.)
So I was sitting there, eating and reading. A little peace in my life. But oh noooo, that is just impossible. And who is suddenly breathing over my shoulder, just inches from me?
Why, now, couldn't you guess. The love of my life…not. Potter.
I was so surprised because I was really immersed in the book that I nearly jumped out of my skin. Well, not out of my skin, but out of my seat. In short, I sent him crashing to the floor and me running out of the hall. He tried to follow but I was too quick for him.
The people at breakfast were all staring at my soap-opera-ish behavior. I suppose that there isn't much action at the 5:30 breakfast shift.
It should stay that way, in my opinion. It should also stay a James Potter-free zone. Sadly, this morning the lovely James-Potter-free-ness has gone. Sadly.
It's really all my fault. Well, no, his. It's HIS fault he embarrassed me in front of the whole, entire train…oh Lord. I won't forget this as long as I live. Thanks a lot, Potter…
Am considering skipping History of Magic. Binns probably wouldn't even know I was missing…ooh, temptation. However, I have never skived off a class and don't particularly want to start now. After all, like Mum says, if you give in and hide, it shows that the other person winning and everything…oh, forget what Mum says. I can't face the world! The world is not kind. Especially not to human/beets such as myself. (A fact I know very well, and the last day has proved.)
In History of Magic. What an utter joy. Did you really think I'd skip it? No, I'm too much of a studying geek, which also has the issue of transforming into a human beet when she blushes. A rather convenient situation, if I do say so myself. I wouldn't even have to go to this stupid class if that were the case! I could just…what do beets do all day? Beets me. (Corny, corny, corny joke. Dad would be proud…they are his one and only variety of joke. Trust me, it gets really annoying after just an hour of a car trip.)
This is why I am not a permanent beet-because the two options of being one end in:
a. Being sliced up and served in a salad, or cooked…and eventually being eaten! Eurgh, I feel really sorry for vegetables right now…I never thought I'd say that.
b. Be left smushed in the corner of a refrigerator drawer and be forgotten about, and get all moldy and disgusting.
Neither of which are very appealing to me.
What is this, Throw Lily Notes So She Can't Concentrate On Taking Notes Day? TLNSSCCOTND, for short. We should really make it a national holiday or something, as nobody is allowing me to take my horrendously boring notes in peace and quiet! First it was Tessa:
Lily? Will you talk-Tessa
Why, I believe I am faintly familiar with that skill. Who knew?
Then it was Minnie. I thought she was practically in a coma, she was actually sleeping. Just a little bit ago she apparently woke up…and for joy, yet another slip of paper was magically thrown to my desk.
Lilsykins…come on! Don't be upset…you've been acting really, really weird. Even weirder than normal I might add! Everybody has probably forgotten by now anyways…
Just then a really, really annoying boy (Christopher, maybe? Curly blonde hair, face like a constipated rat…okay, okay) started humming the Li-leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee will you go out with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-tune. Stupid constipated rat.
I looked at Minnie and made a face. This is far from over…
Oh my Lord.
I was just in Defense Against the Dark Arts and…oh, I feel as if I'm going to vomit. What did I do now?
Okay, Okay, I'll explain. I was just sitting there in class, innocently minding my own business, taking detailed notes on the Poppleyponse—a really weird horse-like creature that has the properties of a unicorn but can turn really nasty when provoked…but back to the matter at hand.
And then this random fourth year appears at the door and is all, "Professor Griggins? Er, Professor Dumbledore asked to see Lily Evans."
I am in a state of shock. I was never asked to "see" the headmaster. Never in my life! It was always Sirius or James or Remus or Peter, sometimes all together. What did I do? I'm most certainly not a trouble maker! Ack! So nervous, and following the fourth year still. After all—I've never been to Dumbledore's office before! How am I to know where it? Oh no!
Everybody was looking as I went out of the class, numb from shock.
We are here…oh Lord, just kill me now and get it over with, why don't you…
If I wasn't dead earlier, I might as well be now.
Only not for reasons you might suspect.
I'm not expelled. Was it possible to be more embarrassed than I was in that bloody office? Sorry Dumbledore. Oy. I don't even want to talk about it.
However, I know I'll end up recounting it at some time, so…might as well be now. Just great.
So we (me and the fourth year—who knows what his importance is, certainly not me) reached Dumbledore's office. I think I said this before but I'd never been there before…it was all whirly silver gadget thingies and eclectic artifacts and a pretty gold-and-red bird. I think I read somewhere that it's a phoenix, but anyway.
Dumbledore was sitting behind his desk. Well, obviously. But who was also sitting there, on one of the chairs? I swear, the guy must be stalking me!
Mr. Potter. Why am I so not surprised?
So I am probably standing there with my mouth hanging open, but Dumbledore beckons me to the chair next to James. I sit in it. Really, how can you disobey the headmaster? He has the very great power to expel people and cool stuff like that. Super powers, I tell you.
He's all "Lily, sit down. I have something to tell you that concerns Mr. Potter."
I tried to keep my face neutral. It was not easy. I think I managed a nod, hopefully.
"Well—Mr. Potter has just mentioned to me that there was an—oh, we'll call it an—incident—on the train."
Some incident, I was thinking darkly. That Potter had better not told DUMBLEDORE of all people about the horrendous asking-out-while-playing-a-scary-tape-in-front-of-everybody, or else I would kill him. Probably wouldn't go down too well with Dumbledore, which is why I sat in my chair, nodding like a nitwit to everything he said.
"He tells me that when he was trying to gain entry to your compartment" (gain entry? More like force the wall down) "…but failed. I had asked him to tell you something, but it is quite alright, for I think a day hardly makes a large difference."
I nodded again, really quite puzzled. What could I possibly have to do with Potter? This had to be some horrible misunderstanding. Oh please…
"He was trying to tell you that both of you have been appointed to the Heads positions!" Dumbledore announced joyfully to both of him.
I think I must have been gaping at him for quite a while then, like a stunned fish or something. How stupid could I have been, really? It'd totally slipped my mind when I'd entered the train…why, I'd been too mortified to remember! And that's why he had been banging annoyingly on the compartment door for such a long time. Ooooh…
And. I. Am. Head. With. POTTER!
What does this world have against me? Seriously, I would really like to know. Maybe I was born under an unlucky star, although I've never really believed in Divination. Bunch of loonies in weird costumes predicting wildly your future. But still. I would totally believe the unlucky star thing. It is, so, so true. It would explain a LOT.
Dumbledore blabbered on about a bunch of stuff I was too busy being shocked to listen to properly. The long and short of it is that Potter is head boy! And I am head girl.
I am thinking of resigning. Can you do that?
Am in state of shock. Wandering round the halls like a green-eyed zombie.
Was planning on waking up earlier like yesterday, however the plan backfired because I slept in. When I woke up (10:00, a far cry from yesterday…4 and a half hours after in fact) I saw Minnie and Tessa ogling me with really weird googly eyes. Kind of standing over me. Waiting for me to wake up. How creepy is that?
Oh, I suppose I should talk a little about my friends. That's what diaries are for, right? Writing about your friends and your day. Sadly, all that's in this thing is Potter.
Which is pretty pathetic, if you think about it. But whatever.
Anyway, Minnie and Tessa are great. Tessa's sort of dark (she was born in Egypt) and has lovely big deep brown eyes and black hair that's naturally straight and pretty (lucky her!). She's got a sense of humor and is kind, obviously. I met Tessa first—we were both scrawny little first years (her probably being a prettier-scrawny first year, if that's possible) without any known friends. We met up right away and starting chattering. We've been friends ever since…aww, sob story. I've got to go hug Tessa now.
-Back. Okay, they were both whispering (are they plotting against me? I totally wouldn't doubt it) and glancing at me and Tessa looked really confused when I hugged her. But, moving on.
Minnie's a lot different. She has kind of sharp blue eyes (but they're still pretty) and really white skin, and dark brown hair. She has very sharp-featured, straight nose and deep red lips. She's also impossibly thin as a yardstick. She's not exactly beautiful, but her face isn't unpleasant. Tessa and I had found her in an argument with a Slytherin about God knows what. Her tongue is just another something sharp about Minnie. (It's short from Minuetta—she hates it, and she'll hex anybody into next Tuesday is they call her by her birth name.)
Ho hum. Going to go now.
Found a letter slipped into my bag when I was taking my Transfiguration text book out to finish my stupid essay on the proper wand-movement of changing an alligator to a piano.
It was on a crumpled sheet of parchment (probably crushed by my abundance of books…) and written rather messily in scribbled ink. Like a six-year-old's handwriting. I opened it up with some interest—after all, who would be giving me a note? Minnie and Tessa don't need a note…they share a bloody dormitory with me! So I quickly opened it up and read the crumply parchment…
Meet me in the common room, Sunday the 4th at 12:00 at night. Don't be late.
Oooh lala, suspenseful…
A/N: Erm…well. I hoped you liked it and everything, I personally thought it was really refreshing, writing a diary fic…okay. Well…review please? If you like the story…reviews encourage me SO much to keep going, and make me spit out the chapters so much quicker. If you didn't like it…I don't really mind flames, or constructive criticism. Ok! If you have any suggestions or ideas or comments whatsoever…please, review! I'll love you forever and give you my famed imaginary cupcakes (imaginary sprinkles included). Okay…bye! (And don't forget about the blue button down there…it's calling your name!)