Disclaimer: I don't own FullMetal Alchemist AT ALL, I merely take the characters and use them for my own twisted purposes and without making a cent, I might add, so don't sue.

Warnings: Yaoi (or malexmale sexual relationships), chan (or underage sex), incest, and a sort of unaware molestation (or, more blatantly, a hand job without the receiving party knowing it), no spoilers to speak of. If any of the things I have just mentioned either make you uncomfortable, are something that someone of your age shouldn't be reading, or are just not your cup of tea, then please turn back now. I WILL NOT tolerate closed-minded-ness in any review and said review will be posted in my GreatestJournal, yakuengichan, to be scorned and laughed at by myself and my friends. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Notes: This is only my second attempt at an FMA fic, and my first attempt at a first-person POV and the EdxAl pairing. I guess the pairing's kind've growing on me... Though RoyxEd will always be my OTP X)


I Just Wanted to Feel You Again

It's been so long, nearly four years, since I've looked into those golden eyes. They're only a few shades darker than mine, the same as your hair. You've got this innocent look that I couldn't even pull off when I was innocent. Well, I guess neither of us are innocent anymore, but you still have that same quality, haven't lost it even with all you've been through...all we've been through, and I almost envy you for that. I almost wish I could go back and change everything, so that maybe I'd be more like you, looking out at the world and everything in it as if it were brand new and the most wonderful thing you could possibly imagine... But that's all it would be, a wish; can't go back and change things now; all we can do is try to make up for our sins.

And I realize, as I look from the cold empty suit of armor that has housed your soul for what seems like a lifetime and let my eyes rove over that body that I knew so well - that dark golden gaze, dusty-blonde hair, the two-inch height difference that you've always had over me since you hit the age of four - that maybe...we have.

"Al..." I nearly whimper, taking a few hesitant and shaky steps towards you, almost waiting for you to morph back into that seven-foot-tall suit of armor the second I lift my left hand to your cheek and feel the warmth of your skin. "Did it really work"

I'm a little worn out by the process (an odd sensation, considering no other transmutation has ever taken so much energy, save one), and you quickly tighten your arms around my waist as I start to sag slightly, holding me against your body as you lower both of us to the ground. "It really worked, Brother." you murmur cheerfully, holding me close and breathing in deeply of my scent. I'm not really sure what it is you're smelling for, but I notice, as I press my face to the crook of your neck, that you smell exactly as I remember you did. "Brother..." I can hear your voice shaking and I immediately pull away, searching your eyes hurriedly for the reason behind the tears brimming them...before I see the smile on your lips. "Brother..." you repeat, and I lean into your hand softly cradling my neck"I missed you so much."

And suddenly, all traces of my weariness are washed away as your lips brush against mine, softly, hesitantly, searchingly. It's been four long years speaking of only the Philosopher's Stone between us, neither of us was sure what would happen once your body had been restored. But both of our desires had been the same, which is apparent from the way we kiss each other now, hungrily and desperate for that intimacy we'd lost when I'd lost you your body.

I moan softly into your mouth as you push the black jacket from my shoulders, the gentle touch of your soft hands raising goose bumps on my left arm. As your hand drifts questioningly down to the button of my pants I easily arch into it and move to mirror the action on your own clothing, and suddenly we're both kneeling up, pressing our hips to each other enough to excite both of our long-repressed bodies but not enough to hinder either of our movements.

You finally break our desperate kiss in a deep gasp of pleasure as I push your pants from your hips and brush my fingers over your hardened flesh and your hands falter for a moment as they seek out my own arousal. But they soon find it and I note that your hands are a bit colder than they should be, but soon forget the oddity as I moan softly against your ear even as I close my hand around your length and begin stroking you slowly. You're suddenly whimpering and writhing under my grasp but still manage to compose yourself enough to send me into the same state of writhing pleasure as you mimic my gestures on my own body.

We're soon panting against each other's cheeks, the breath sending shivers through our bodies as it puffs over perspiration-slicked skin and I moan your name as you quicken the pumping of my shaft in response to mine. We both want more, so much more; to feel the other writhing beneath him as they're entered, the irreversible intimacy of the act, but it's always been an unspoken rule between us that if we didn't go any further than this, than maybe it wasn't truly a sin. It was mostly for your benefit, but I can live with just this, as long as it's with you.

You're moans have become almost pained as I bring you closer and closer to that climax you'd been cheated out of these past four years and I murmur soothingly to you as I nuzzle your neck, though my own voice is a bit strained as I, too, hover just beyond the edge of finish. You finally cry out as you come, your bright eyes glazing over in that pure moment of ecstasy where all thought ceases and your body is nothing but the pleasure arcing through it. I hold back a whimper as the warmth spreads on my hand, accenting the fact that the motion on my own throbbing member has stopped, but that's soon rectified as you come back to your senses. Within moments my hips buck into your grasp as I moan hoarsely against your throat and I vaguely register your hand stroking my hair as I release onto your hand.

"Brother...I'm sorry..." I hear you murmur guiltily. I can't imagine what you could possibly be feeling guilty about and I pull away from you, having trouble opening my eyes as my body suddenly feels like it's coming out of a deep sleep. My eyebrows furrow slightly as I see a face of armor turned slightly away from me and I unclench my hands from the sheets beneath me as a distinct stickiness cools on my stomach. "Al..." I murmur in my state of groggy confusion, only to see you rise from your position crouched beside my bed, your voice and the slump in your seven-foot armored stance the only clues to your thoughts. I watch you curiously as you meander off towards the bathroom before your quiet voice floats back to me.

"I just wanted to feel you again..."