8. Things Unsaid
OMG guyz, I'm sooooo sorry i haven't written in a while. It's report card time, whic means I'll have a cuple weeks away from the computer. Anyways, I finished. After this only three chapters. Its almost over folks. Tell me how its been or how it is. I live offa reviews.
"Raven, I've known you almost three years. All these years and I have never said a single word to you. Today is the day I start talking. Today is the day I say the things we've left unsaid.
As time grows short, I realize the gravity of departure. In a few short days you will exit my life forever. I cannot bear the thought of never having confessed my feelings to you, and never seeing you again.
I am too much of a coward to tell you myself, but I tell you nonetheless. I've known you for three years, and ever since I first met you… I have loved you. I have loved everything about you, Raven. And now, I face the inevitability of losing you. But, before we go, I just wanted you to know.
I love you Raven. I have always loved you."
Beast Boy read, then re-read his note. He knew it was cheesy. He knew it was terrible. He had been writing it for over a year, he was just waiting for the right moment to give it up. The day before the last time he would ever see her seemed as good as any. He folded the note, and stood up. He walked down the hall and towards Raven room.
He raised his hand to knock, then paused. He hesitated, and put his hand back at his side. What if she doesn't like me? What if she rejects me?…Now is not the time to worry about this.
He took another deep breath and raised his hand once again, confidence building every second. The door opened before he even had a chance to knock, his hand was still up in the air.
"Raven! Umm…" He snuck a quck glance at her. There was something different. She seemed… changed, not herself.
"What is it Beast Boy?" Her voice carried gravity, not like her usual cynic drawl. Something was wrong and Beast Boy wanted to scream it out.
"I just… I just…" Beast Boy looked down at his feet, he couldn't face Raven. He instead raised his hand, and left the rest to her. "I just wanted to give you this." He finally choked out, and scampered away.
Raven held the note in her hands, knowing full well what it was. She was almost scared to open, scared of what it could mean.
She slowly unfolded it and looked over Beast Boy's messy scribbles. There were ripped corners, and countless words scratched out, he had clearly revised this many times.
Finally, she swallowed her fears, and began to read. Raven, I've
known you almost three years…
Beast Boy was kicking himself. I shouldn't have ran. I should've stayed. I should've read it to her. I should've been there. I should've held her. I should've told her.
Now, all he could do was wait. Wait for her to either never talk to him again, or wait for her to come running, two things he was equally dreading. He had made the mistake of not being there. Now, he would face the repercussions. He would either never see her, or he would never see his love returned. Most likely both.
He sighed. Then, came a knock at the door.
Raven raced through Titans' Tower. She had to find Beast Boy. She had to find out what this was all about. She had to hear the words. She had to know if this was how Beast Boy really felt. The hallways twisted and turned, merely obstacles in her quest to find what she was deathly afraid of, yet wanted more than anything in her life.
She found herself suddenly I front of Beast Boy's door. She reached to let herself in, but the door slid open without her touch. She looked up to face Robin, stony-faced as ever, not throwing Raven a single glance as he shoved past her.
She watched him go, then shook herself into the moment at hand. Beast Boy was standing, his head hung low, slowly shaking in disgust, sadness, pain, or all three.
"What is this Beast Boy?" Raven choked out, unable to hide her tears, and inevitable sobs.
"I…" The world stood still as Raven awaited the long sought after words. The words she had wanted to hear so badly. The words that would finally release her from the shackles of loneliness. "I…didn't mean for things to… end this way." He said, never looking up. He too shoved past her, shaking a few tears from his face as she went.
The world was dark, and lonely. Darker and lonelier than it ever was. Raven's happiness was but a stone's throw away, but the powers that be grabbed the stone and chucked it a thousand miles in the opposite direction.
So, Raven sat, the lonely night closing in on her once again. Tears streamed endlessly down her cheeks, and the carpet dug deep into her legs. This was truly the end. She had had one shot. One moment to make everything better again, to salvage what was left of her life. And then t was over. No retries, no resets, no words whatsoever.
She cried, and cried. But, nothing came. Nothing exploded, nothing shattered, nobody came to see what was the matter. Raven was just there, by herself, with not even herself to turn to.
Beast Boy's door swished open once more. Raven looked up hopefully. Instead of Beast Raven's sad eyes rested upon Robin, who was standing, his face, again, giving nothing away. He said three words, the three words that changed this night forever. Three words that revived the Teen Titans from their weeklong death.
"We're going now."