Title: Yet Now I See
Disclaimer: Yuugiou is owned by Takahashi Kazuki. Since Bakura Ryou isn't a sarcastic little sumbitch and Anzu has yet to declare herself Lady of the Dance, I'm not Takahashi-san.
Warnings: Angst and the vaguest suggestion of sexual activity. Not really enough for a strong R but that's my rating just to be on the safe side.
Yet Now I See
He couldn't remember when he opened his eyes.
For well over a year he and his 'lover' had been meeting secretly, using one another in place of the one they both wanted. It had been his idea; misery loves company and all that.
It had been easy to pretend, to close his eyes and see with his mind. So long as they didn't speak his name both young men could lock themselves in their own separate fantasies.
Until he opened his eyes and looked at the man over him, inside him, and he knew. He could no longer pretend that it was Yuugi he was with. No matter how many times he closed his eyes, no matter how hard he tried to replace the other in his mind, he was hyperaware that he was in bed with Yami no Yuugi... with Atemu.
So he stopped pretending. True, he still closed his eyes at the beginning of each of their rendezvous, but as they moved against one another he'd find his eyes sliding open, Every time he watched Atemu, knowing that the other wasn't really there, wasn't seeing him,. But Katsuya knew who he was with.
The third time after he opened his eyes he gasped out Atemu's name. The Pharaoh had not heard it. One slip lead to a second, and a third. Soon it was no longer the hikari haunting Katsuya's heart and mind and dreams, but the yami.
And still he opened his eyes, memorizing his lover's face even as they rocked together in the hotel bed. His eyelids would flutter, but never close until the last moment, when the physical pleasure became too much. Then he'd close his eyes and whisper his lover's name, hoping that he would not hear yet wishing Atemu's passion was for him.
He opened his eyes, saw that the other's were closed. A soft sigh escaped him and he let himself fall limp on the bed, legs sliding from around Atemu's waist. For as long as he was able, Katsuya simply watched his lover breathe, enjoying the comforting weight on top of him.
As he drifted towards sleep, he felt his lover shift to leave. In his near-dream state he reached out, a quiet 'temu' passing his lips. When he sensed the warm weight settle next to him, Katsuya curled up against the other man with a content sigh.
He didn't hear me, the blond mused lazily. He doesn't see me. I'll take what I can.
His final thoughts before falling asleep were, Please, see me someday. Please love me.
Yeah, I know, I was mean to them again. But like I always say, it's good for the boys to suffer a little for their happiness.
And don't worry, there is a sequel in the works for this one.